words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is introducing Phoebe, who is playing her guitar for the crowd.]
Rachel: Everybody? Shh, shhh. Uhhh... Central Perk is proud to present the music of Miss Phoebe Buffay.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone with her mother. Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross are there.]
Rachel: Wow, this is so cool, you guys. The entire city is blacked out!
Rachel: Wow, you guys, this is big.
(Monica and Rachel look at Phoebe strangely.)
Rachel: That had to hurt!
Rachel: Alright, somebody.
Rachel: Um... Ross?
Phoebe: Oh, Rachel.
Rachel: Oh come on, I already went.
Rachel: Oh, alright. The weirdest place would have to be... (sigh)... oh, the foot of the bed.
[Time lapse, Ross and Rachel are talking, Joey is on the couch, and Monica and Phoebe are out of the room.]
Rachel: I just never had a relationship with that kind of passion, you know, where you have to have somebody right there, in the middle of a theme park.
Rachel: There, well, see? Barry wouldn't even kiss me on a miniature golf course.
Rachel: No, he said we were holding up the people behind us.
Rachel: I mean, do you think there are people who go through life never having that kind of...
Rachel: Yeah right.
Rachel: (sigh) OK.
Rachel: You don't.
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: You do?
Rachel: Oh Ross, you're so great. (she playfully rubs his head and gets up)
Joey: You and Rachel.
Joey: Yeeeeaaaahhh! What's messing you up? The wine? The candles? The moonlight? You've just got to go up to her and say, 'Rachel, I think that...' (Rachel comes into the room behind them)
Rachel: What are you shushing?
Rachel: Ahhhh!
Rachel: Huh. (she agrees, but looks very confused)
Joey: OK. (Ross goes out on the balcony to talk to Rachel)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Ross and Rachel are talking.]
Rachel: Hmmm... this is so nice.
Rachel: OK.
Rachel: Ohhh!!!! (looking at something behind Ross)
Rachel: Oh, look at the little cat! (a small kitten is on the roof behind Ross)
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
Rachel: During a blackout? He'd get trampled!
[Scene: The hallway of Monica's building. Phoebe and Rachel are trying to find the cat's owner.]
Rachel: Oh. (they knock at the next door, Mr. Heckles answers) Hi. We just found this cat and we're looking for the owner.
Rachel: Bob Buttons?
Mr. Heckles: (as Phoebe and Rachel leave) You owe me a cat.
[Scene: Rachel has gone off on her own to look for the cat's owner.]
Rachel: Here, kitty-kitty. Here kitty-kitty. Where did you go, little kitty-kitty-kitty? Here kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty...
(While looking at the floor for the cat, Rachel runs into a pair of legs. She slowly gets up and sees a gorgeous Italian hunk holding the cat. Who, by the way, you'll hate very, very soon. The man. Not the cat.)
Rachel: Wow. (she exhales in amazement, blowing the candle out)
Rachel: (entering with Paolo, arm in arm) Everybody, this is Paolo. Paolo, I want you to meet my friends. This is Monica.
Rachel: And Joey....
Rachel: And Ross.
Rachel: (proudly) He doesn't speak much English.
Rachel: Look at that!
Rachel: Oh... Italy, I think.
Rachel: Well, the cat... the cat turned out to be Paolo's cat!
Ross: That, that is funny... (to Joey).... and Rachel keeps touching him.
Rachel: Oh, I found him. He was Paolo's cat.
Rachel: Ah, Paolo, this is Phoebe.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Paolo are at the window. Ross and Joey are watching disgustedly.]
Paolo: (something romantic in Italian about Rachel and the stars)
(Rachel walks away from Paolo, laughing.)
Rachel: I have absolutely no idea.
Rachel: (to Monica and Phoebe) Oh my God, you guys, what am I doing? What am I doing? This is so un-me!
Phoebe: I know, I just want to bite his bottom lip. (Rachel looks at her) But I won't.
Rachel: God, the first time he smiled at me... those three seconds were more exciting than three weeks in Bermuda with Barry.
Rachel: Y'know, I know it's totally superficial and we have absolutely nothing in common, and we don't even speak the same language but Goooooooddddddd....
Ross: Listen. Um, listen. Something you should... know... um, Rachel and I... we're kind of a thing.
Ross: No, no, no. Technically the... sex is not... being had, but that's... see, that's not the point. See, um, the point is that... Rachel and I should be, er, together. You know, and if you get in the.... um...
(The lights come back on, and Rachel and Paolo are making out. Ross clutches his chest.)
Rachel: Ubb.
Rachel: That was amazing. I can't even send back soup.
(They hug. And quickly that hug turns into a heated make out session, right there on the waiting room couch. Chandler, Rachel, and Monica quickly make their exits.)
(Rachel enters from her room.)
Rachel: Honey, someday you are gonna make some man the luckiest guy in the world.
Rachel: Who is being loud?
(Rachel yanks on his legs again and he groans in pain.)
Phoebe: Goodie! Thanks. So, how is it living with Rachel again? I mean, apart from the great food.
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Phoebe is eating breakfast with Monica while Frank is playing with num-chucks on the balcony]
Rachel: Well, you know, no suds, no save.
Rachel: Y'know I cant believe I even thought about getting back together again! We are so over!!
Rachel: Are you drunk?!
Monica: I don't know. Rachel I'm-I'm sorry that I hurt your ankles.
[Phoebe turns back around but Rachel is gone. Ross enters.]
Rachel: (on phone) Yeah, oh my God, tomorrow! That, no, its perfect. Oh God, thank you soo much. Great! Bye! (hangs up phone) I got the interview!
[We then go into another set of flashbacks of famous fights. The first is the second breakup of Ross and Rachel from The One With The Jellyfish.]
Rachel: (on phone) Hi, Mindy. Hi, it-it's Rachel. Yeah, I'm fine. I-I saw Barry today. Oh, yeah, yeah he-he told me. No, no, it's okay. I hope you two are very happy, I really do. Oh, oh, and Mind, y'know, if-if everything works out, and you guys end up getting married and having kids- and everything- I just hope they have his old hairline and your old nose. (Slams the phone down.) (To everyone) Okay, I know it was a cheap shot, but I feel so much better now.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Shhh! Im on a call! (On phone) Umm well yeah, you can pick it up tonight, say 8:30? At-at my apartment. Its umm, its umm 5 Morton Street, Apartment 14, umm and then maybe yknow after we can grab a bite to eat or whatever. (Listens) Okay, well okay Ill see you then. (Listens) Bye. (Hangs up.)
Rachel: Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet. I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo, I mean he had already named both my breasts! ...Ooh. Did I just share too much?
(Ross sadly hangs up the phone, while Phoebe looks at him. Cut to Rachel at the gate. She gives her boarding pass to the gate attendant, and she goes onboard. The gate attendant closes the door and locks it.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering the living room from her bedroom.]
Rachel: If you hold a spider.
Rachel: Yeah its umm Yeah its uh It-its yknowIts nothing.
Rachel: Hey, Chandler, don't freak out! I'm telling you something you already know! Come on, she broke up with Richard because he didn't want to have babies. And she's a woman, and she's almost 30, and y'know it's Monica.
Rachel: Monica? Monica!
Rachel: Okay Monica, what are you doing? You're gonna lose your job! This is not you!
Rachel: No, Ive just always wanted to do that. Can you help me clean this up?
Joey: I thought you paid. (Rachel does not answer and seems puzzled) Ha, guess we won’t be going back there!
Rachel: You know, Ross, just keep making your jokes. How are you gonna feel if we actually do win?
Rachel: Well, she told me. She said shes kinda a loner.
Rachel (as Monica): You know what, it's feeling a lot better, thank you, um... Well, listen, why don't you two sit down and, and we'll get you some glasses... okay... (They don't know what to do with their coats and Monica points to the living room) STAT!
PHOEBE: I'm so sorry honey, but, okay, Rachel gave this guy her number and, um, she doesn't want Ross to answer the phone.� So, you have to intercept all his calls.
Rachel: Well, this is really awkward (staring at the floor) Oh, and I can leave!
Rachel: Okay, well, I'm gonna clear out some of these boxes. (She grabs a couple of the old pizza boxes and exits.)
Rachel: Hello? Yes, she is, hold on a second, please. Monana, it's for you, the credit card people.
Rachel: Alright, I don't wanna alarm anybody, but Monica's hair is twice as big as it was when we landed!
Ross: What a great idea! That will get Rachel to forgive me!
Rachel: Oh no!!!! Oh my God!! This is all making so much sense to me now! This is why Adam Carter wouldnt go out with me! This is why Billy Tratt would just stay in this region! (Motions to her breasts.) (Joey has turned around.)
Rachel: It's so that I can spend Thanksgiving with my family. See, every year we go skiing in Vail, and normally my father pays for my ticket, but I sort of started the whole independence thing, you know, which is actually why I took this job.
Ross: So, uh, Rachel, what are you, uh, what're you doing tonight?
Rachel: Do you even know what a vicar is?
Rachel: (to Joanne) So what's going on with you?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Phoebe, Joey, and Rachel are there.]
Rachel: And the ring, was the size of my fist (makes a fist)!
Rachel: So, um, did she...
Rachel: What?
Rachel: ...So a bird just grabbed it, and then tried to fly away with it and, and then just dropped it on the street?
Rachel: Oh my God! Oh my God, look at these pelts!
Rachel: He was right there. He got down on one knee and proposed.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is opening the door.]
Ross and Rachel: Goodnight.
Joey: Estelle said I didn't get it. (Sits down next to Rachel on the couch.)
Rachel: Okay, fine. Gunther, y'know what, I am a terrible waitress, do you know why Im a terrible waitress? Because, I dont care. I dont care. I dont care which pot is regular and which pot is decaf, I dont care where the tray spot is, I just dont care, this is not what I want to do. So I dont think I should do it anymore. Im gonna give you my weeks notice.
Monica: No! Rachel, you didn't find anyone so you can't tell him.
Rachel: Oh, you-you mean your earrings?
Rachel: (entering) You guys, youre never gonna believe what I just found tacked up on a telephone pole! (Shes holding a flyer.) Look kinda familiar?
Ross: Hey! I did not dump Rachel! (To Mona) Nor are we still together. (The phone rings and Ross goes to answer it, only hes trapped behind the apothecary table by Dr. Green.) Can I just (Dr. Green glares at him.) Why dont we just let the machine get that?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are eating breakfast.]
Rachel: You!
Rachel: So, got any advice? Y'know, as someone who's recently been- dumped?
Rachel: (on phone) Daddy, I just... I can't marry him! I'm sorry. I just don't love him. Well, it matters to me!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe.]
(Barry and Rachel look at each other.)
Rachel: I was laughing! You made me laugh! (Monica and Rachel start to squabble)
Rachel: (entering) Joey, what are you doing with the bag? You're audition is not until tomorrow.
MONICA: Yeah, well you promised Barry, you'd marry him. (Rachel glares at her, and she retreats to safety between Richard's legs)
Terry: Rachel, Rachel, sweetheart. You're a terrible, terrible waitress. Really, really awful.
[Scene: Chandler's apartment. Chandler is sitting between Rachel and Ross.]
[Scene: Monica's eye doctor's office, Monica and Rachel are waiting in an exam room and looking at this big white thing used to check eyes. I have no idea what it is, and if an ophthalmologist happens to know what that is, let me know.]
Rachel: Okay, you look in the kitchen, I will look in the back closet.
Rachel: Yeah, well it was. I, I broke a cup.
Monica: (turns his back to the stairs) Oh, it's a great party! Great food. Y'know, most parties it's all chips and salsa, chips and salsa. (As she's saying this Rachel tries to head downstairs but is blocked by people coming upstairs. She quickly retreats back up the stairs.) (Sees that she has to keep him distracted longer.) So umm, what's this? (Points to his plate.)
Rachel: Thanks, you can just put it on the table.
RACHEL: So wait, this guy goes down for like two years at a time?
(Rachel enters.)
Rachel: Yeah! Ive been sailing my whole life. When I was fifteen my dad bought me my own boat.
Rachel: Oh my god.
Rachel: Thank you. Thank you so much!
Rachel: Saw what?
(Rachel enters, excited.)
Rachel: Ok, I'm gonna get my stuff.
Monica: Hello? Hello? Oh! Rachel, it's Paolo calling from Rome.
Rachel: Ok.
Rachel: I can't, I gotta go.
Rachel: Oh? Yeah! Sure!
Rachel: Noo!! No! You thought, you actually thought I wanted to have sex with you?!
(Amy looks at Ross, angrily. Rachel clearly doesn't understand what he meant and looks at Ross who gestures "later".)
Rachel: Because!
Rachel: Because!
Rachel: Well, you should have.
Rachel: No! No! Seriously, whats wrong with the dog?! Wait a minute, what are you doing home so early? What happened to your date?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: By all means.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, the whole gang is there, except for Ross and Rachel. Joey is trying to eat Chinese with chopsticks and fails miserably. Theres a knock on the door, and Chandler answers it to reveal Rachel]
Rachel: Oh my God! Yes, I would love that, oh, that is soo sweet, Joey.
[Cut to later, the party is in full swing. Rachel is in the kitchen and Chandler goes over to talk to her.]
Rachel: (as Monica) Aahh, I'm a... chef at a restaurant uptown.
Rachel: (pretends to be stunned) Oh! Wi... in the dres... in the dressing room!? Well, that's so weird! Phoebe and I were just trying on clothes in the dressing room. God it's just such a small world!
Rachel: Yeah, when were in the audience he doesnt talk to us, but he does wave.
Rachel: I know. Joey: I don't get it. I mean, I was so sure this was what I wanted.