words in movies
Richard: (standing behind her, without his moustache) I can help with that.
Monica: Oh my God. Richard? (turns around) Hi!
Richard: Hi!
Monica: Wow! Your lip went bald. (Richard pays the clerk) Hey, thanks.
Richard: So, you look great.
Richard: No you do. You... just...
Richard: Youve got panties stuck to your leg.
Richard: Its good to see you.
(They hug, and Richard notices a stocking stuck to Monicas back, which he removes for her.)
Richard: Hes gonna go up to the counter with Citizen Kane, Vertigo, and Clockwork Orgy. (they both laugh) This is nice.
Richard: I missed this.
Richard: So, you wanna get a hamburger or something?
Richard: Oh. Look, just friends, I wont grope you. I promise.
Richard: No its not too soon, I had lunch at a eleven.
Monica: Yeah well, I ran into Richard.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is teaching Richard how to make lasagne.]
Richard: So when people complement me on my cooking should I, what do I say?
Richard: Ew, this feels very weird.
Richard: Yeah, well, sure I touch them, but I spent years learning not to squish them. (Monica grabs his hand in the tomatoes.) Thats my hand.
Richard: Okay.
Richard: Tomatoes are squishing.
(Richard squishes a little too hard and some lands on his shirt.)
Richard: Op.
Richard: Yeah.
Richard: What?
Richard: Ill just throw them out.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is talking to Richard on the phone.]
Monica: Yeah, I do think its better this way. (listens) Yeah, were being smart. (gets up to answer the door) (listens) Yes, Im sure.(she opens the door and its Richard)
Richard: You really sure?
[Scene: Monicas bedroom, shes in bed with Richard.]
Richard: Absolutely, this will just be something we do, like racquetball.
Richard: Just your dad. (pause) Although thats actually racquetball. You know I-I do have a blind date with my sisters neighbour next Tuesday.
Richard: You want me to cancel it?
Richard: Okay.
Richard: Exactly. (pushes her back)
(She goes into her bedroom, and sees Richard who has covered the room in roses and has two glasses of wine and a rose between his lips.)
Richard: Hello.
[Scene: Richards bedroom, Monica has covered it in rose pedals and candles. We hear Richard come in to the apartment, and Monica frantically throws the rest of the pedals on the bed, and jumps onto the bed and puts a rose in her mouth, and bites a thorn.]
Richard: (outside the bedroom) Really?! Well, its just like everyone elses apartment. Its got rooms, walls, and ceilings.
Richards Date: Well, I just wanted to see where you lived. Now, give me the tour.
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! (She frantically tries to clean up the bedroom as Richard starts the tour.)
Richard: Ah well, this is the living room.
Richards Date: Impressive.
Richard: All right. This is the kitchen.
Richards Date: Oh, thats real pretty. Wait a minute, dont I get to see the bedroom?
Richard: The bedroom. Well its pretty much your typical... (opens the door as Monica hides under the covers, and quickly closes the door before his date can see the room.) bedroom.
Richards Date: Were still on this side of the door.
Richard: Um-hmm.
Richards Date: Yeah, but I didnt get to see it.
Richard: Oh shoot! Maybe next time. (yawns) Thanks for a lovely evening. (shows her out)
[Cut to into the bedroom, with Monica still hiding under the covers. Richard enters and sits down next to her.]
Richard: Oh, (laughs) that was the blind date that I told you about, she called and switched it to today.
Richard: Well, you seem fine.
Richard: You mean like exclusive friends?
Richard: Wow. Y'know were back where we were. Honey, I would love to do all that, but nothings changed.
Richard: Okay, okay, one things changed. But we still want different things and we know how this is gonna end.
Richard: I know I couldnt. So....
(They both kiss, and Richard picks her up and goes over to the bed and starts to lie down.)
Richard: (lying down) Ow!!
Richard: You were gonna propose? (Sits on the arm of the couch.)
RICHARD: But... he gets it back, pass to the middle, lines it up and... BAM! Yes! Could that shot BE any prettier?
Monica: (on machine) "Hi, uh, Richard it's Monica, um, listen I did something kind of crazy tonight, um, maybe I'm getting my period or something, I don't know." Nooo!!
JOEY: Ok, uh, hey Richard, if you had an extra ticket to the Knicks game and you had to choose between a friend who smells and one who bruises you who would you pick?
Chandler: Richard! No one supposed to know about us! (Richard just smiles at him.) See I, did it again.
Richard: The picture of my wife! In your pack!
Paul: And in fifth grade I got into a fight. Well, it wasnt really a fight. Richard Darinvel bit me on the nose and, and I feel down. I still have a little scare right here (points to it) you can see it.
RICHARD: Hey come on, you haven't heard my reason yet.
Richard: Im wearing two belts.
Richard: Oh, thank you. Youre welcome. (He stands up, staggers to the couch, and starts to lie down.)
[Scene: at Barry and Mindy's reception, Monica and Richard are sitting at a table, and Monica is trying to throw a piece of candy into his mouth.]
Richard: I didnt ask. You wanna come in?
Monica: I mean, my feelings for Richard are certainly gone.
[Scene: Richards Apartment, Monica is looking around and notices an African mask hanging on the wall.]
RICHARD: Boy I would just uh, I would freak out.
Story by Mark J. Kunerth Teleplay by Richard Goodman Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are there. Phoebe enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are setting the table.]
RICHARD: Monica's making us watch Old Yeller.
MONICA: Hi. Richard just told me he loves me.
Phoebe: (sitting down) Oh good! All right, so you decided to tell him about the Richard thing.
Richard: I know this is crazy but am I too late?
Monica: This is crazy! I mean, it's such a stupid argument. I don't even wanna see Richard again.
RICHARD: Charlotte who?
MRS. GELLER: Richard. Richard. Your son isn't seeing anyone is he?
RICHARD: Yeah, if I have to. Monica, I don't wanna lose you, so if I have to do it all over again, then I will.
Richard: And-and then I sneak out and before Monica can her parents come in.
Phoebe: Richard Simmons?! Oh my God!
Richard: That can be arranged.
RICHARD: Yeah, just, I feel like I'm about a hundred. I thought I was just one of the guys.
RICHARD: Uh, in the future, if I could see the schedule beforehand...
Chandler: No! Her boyfriend Richard!
RICHARD: Hey, be right there.
RICHARD: Oh, hey. I love children, I have children. I just don't want to be 70 when our kids go off to college, and our lives can finally start.
MONICA: Ok. [Richard walks in] Hey, why don't you ask Richard?
RICHARD: Wow. Well being a huge Knicks fan myself, I think you should take someone who's a huge Knicks fan.
Dedicated to the Memory of Richard L. Cox, Sr.
RICHARD: That's fine. Well, your other dad and I are gonna go have a romantic evening and I guess I'll just see you kids around.
Ross: Well, this is ironic. Of your last two boyfriends, Richard didnt want to have kids, and from the looks of it, now Pete cant.
RICHARD: Uh, the guy was Lou Gehrig. Didn't you kinda see it coming?
Monica: No, my eye doctor is Richard! I cant go to him when I dont have a boyfriend!
Richard: Well yeah, Im sorry. I know this is the wrong time and the wrong place but I had to tell ya! I wanna spend my life with you. I wanna marry you. I wanna have kids with you.
MONICA: Hey. Where is he, where's Richard? Did you ditch him?
RICHARD: Oh honey, I'm fine.
RICHARD: Hey, you're gettin' better. I'm gonna keep this by the way.
[Richard enters]
Richard: We may not have any weapons, but we still have food. In the basement I saw potatoes and some dry pasta, and a few tins of tuna! (Joey backs away and wipes his face again.)
MONICA: You know what, I think it's cute, you trying to be more like Richard.
JOEY: How come Richard looks so much cooler with one of these than me?
MONICA: You're meeting Richard?
Richard: Oh, hey look nothing happened.
CHANDLER: Hey listen, we've gotta go, I promised Richard we'd meet him downstairs.
RICHARD: I know, I know. Just hang in there, OK. OK, I'll go out first, alright.
RICHARD: It's the basketball playoffs.
Richard: Oh, okay. Well, Ill just leave the door open and go sit on the couch. (Does so.)
[Cut to that same kitchen, only this is The One With The Proposal, Richard is telling Monica something.]
RICHARD: Hey Phoebs, what's happening?
RICHARD: Ok. [leaves]
PHOEBE: What, what's about to happen? [starts watching] I've never seen this part before. Hey, Travis, watcha doin' with that gun? Oh no, no no Travis, put down the gun. No no no no, he he's your buddy, he's your Yeller, no, no no, the end, THE END. [hear the gunshot from the TV] [Scene:Monica and Rachel's apartment. Richard is on the balcony smoking and Monica is on the phone.]
Monica: Me going out with Richards son.
Richard: Is that my ass? (Hes looking at Joeys.)
RICHARD: She's not a twinkie.
RICHARD: Happy birthday.
RICHARD: Guys. Seriously, it is not like that.
RICHARD: Jack, would you let it go?
RICHARD: How ya doin'?
RICHARD: What?
RICHARD: Oh?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are playing Richard at foosball.]
RICHARD: Really?
RICHARD: Oh, thank you Phoebs. That's very sweet.
RICHARD: Two.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Monica is in the bathroom and Richard comes in.]
RICHARD: Right, and...
RICHARD: Right.
RICHARD: Uh, Phoebe, I don't think your mom would want you to see what's about to happen.
RICHARD: No.
RICHARD: Shall we?
RICHARD: Monica.
RICHARD: Well, we had a table in college.
RICHARD: Hey.
RICHARD: Ok, just one more point.
RICHARD: Uh-oh.
RICHARD: Is everything all right?
RICHARD: No. You have got it completely wrong. John Savage was deerhunter, no legs, John Voit was coming home, couldn't feel his legs.
RICHARD: Well.
RICHARD: Well, that's not bad at all. I mean, you had me thinkin it was like a fleet.
RICHARD: Uh, you guys see me as a dad?
RICHARD: Ohh, brisk tonight.
RICHARD: Uh-huh, yeah.
Richard: Of course! Im-Im sorry. I-Id hate you to miss anything like that on account of me. I can do this!
RICHARD: Come on.
RICHARD: Oh, well that's not so crazy.
RICHARD: What're you doing?
RICHARD: Oh, alright.
RICHARD: Thank you.
RICHARD: You're strict.
RICHARD: No that's not true. That is not true.
RICHARD: Well, I'm confused. I thought we shared time.
RICHARD: Yeah.