words in movies
ROSS: I don't know, I don't think mom and dad would mind. Remember when you were 9 and Richard was 30, how dad used to say, 'God I hope they get together.'
[Scene: The Gellers' house. Monica, Ross, and Richard are arriving to Mr. Gellers birthday party.]
RICHARD: Happy birthday.
MRS. GELLER: No, Richard Burke gave them a ride.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's party. Mr. Geller and a friend are questioning Richard while Ross observes.]
RICHARD: I am not telling you guys anything.
RICHARD: Jack, would you let it go?
RICHARD: Guys. Seriously, it is not like that.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Monica is in the bathroom and Richard comes in.]
RICHARD: How ya doin'?
RICHARD: Really? I'm a hero.
RICHARD: Yeah, I know. I hate it too. Look, maybe we should just tell them.
RICHARD: My parents are dead.
RICHARD: I know, I know. Just hang in there, OK. OK, I'll go out first, alright.
RICHARD: [walks out of the bathroom and runs into Mrs. Geller who is going to the bathroom] Judy, going to the bathroom, good for you.
MRS. GELLER: Thank you Richard, I appreciate the support.
MRS. GELLER: I have no idea. Did you know Richard has a twinkie in the city?
MRS. GELLER: I just never would have pictured Richard with a bimbo.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Monica and Richard are alone in the kitchen.]
RICHARD: What?
RICHARD: Humm, really?
MRS. GELLER: Richard. Richard. Your son isn't seeing anyone is he?
RICHARD: Uhh, not that I know of.
RICHARD: That - that's an idea.
RICHARD: Oh?
MONICA: No, a doctor of meat. Of course he's a real doctor. And he's handsome, and he's sweet, and know you'd like him. [she puts her arm around Richard]
RICHARD: It is Judy.
MRS. GELLER: It seems your daughter and Richard are something of an item.
RICHARD: She's not a twinkie.
RICHARD: Really?
MONICA: Dad, dad this is a good thing for me. Ya know, and you even said yourself, you've never seen Richard happier.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are setting the table.]
RICHARD: No, it's been a long time since your dad and I went running.
RICHARD: Very tasteful.
RICHARD: What're we looking at? That blue freckle?
Monica: (crying) So, I went down to the post office, and it turns out it was those videos that I ordered for Richard about the Civil War. He loved the Civil War.
MONICA: I've got a question. Richard made plans again with the guys.
RICHARD: See, if anyone overheard that, I didn't come off well.
Richards Date: Hi, Im Lisa.
Richard: Oh. Good to see you guys.
Monica: (to Richard) Its good to see you
Chandler: Richard!
[Scene: later, Richard and Monica are dancing]
Richard: Hi!
Monica: Richard!
Richard: Why?
Richard: You are?
Monica: Yeah! Richard!
Joey: Richard told Monica he wants to marry her!
Richard: Hi.
Richard: (standing up quickly) Drink?
Richard: Who is it?
Richard: Ahh.
Richard: Oh really?
(Richard mouths, "Wow!")
Richard: Excuse me?
Richard: Oh. (Laughs.) Whew!
Richard: I think thats fair.
Richard: I know. (Backs away.)
Richard: Well she said she had to think things over.
Richard: Chandler.
Richard: Okay, she was here, but she left.
Richard: Well Im sorry.
Richard: Well all right, one thing happened?
[Scene: The Restaurant, Monica and Chandlers and Richard and Lisas tables have been pushed together and theyre all eating and talking.]
MONICA: It is nothing like the Hobbit. It's like reading about every relationship I've ever had, except for Richard.
RICHARD: Hear that? She likes me best, and apparently there've been a lot.
Chandler: Richard used to do it, didn't he?
Richard: Well, my nose got lonely.
Rachel: Richard? I'm not gonna go see your ex-boyfriend!
RICHARD: Phoebe's got another job, right?
RICHARD: Uh, they're not in it.
Richard: Working with blind kids.
Monica: Oh God, maybe he wont see us. Richard!
RICHARD: A moustache comb.
RICHARD: I guess we just keep dancing.
Richard: Okay, okay, one things changed. But we still want different things and we know how this is gonna end.
Richard: That might be fun. (Richard and Lisa sit down.)
Monica: And y'know what, I just realised, in the last year Ive only gone out with two guys, Richard and Julio. You gotta help me out here, you gotta set me up, you gotta get me back in the game.
Richard: Uh, no! No! Thats art! If it bothers you I can put my art out.
RICHARD: That's it? That's the giant number you were afraid to tell me?
Monica: (very excited) Oh, and you know who's selling a great apartment? Richard!
Richard: Nice to meet you Joey.
Richard: You too, you let uh, your hair grow long.
RICHARD: You're gonna do what to my clocks.
Richard: No I didnt.
Richard: Yeah, sure.
Richard: All right.
Richard: I think I lost. Three times.
RICHARD: Glad to be of help. Matches. [walks out to the balcony]
Richard: Great!
Richard: Oh, thanks.
Richard: I found the picture!
Richard: Well of course I am!
Richard: I found the picture!
Richard: No!
Richard: You wouldnt happen to have a very big fork?
Richard: Well have we finished the scene?
Richard: Why? Are we done for the day?
Richard: As were you.
Richard: Now, that can be arranged! (He brings his sword back and drops it, causing it to fly over the wall.) Slippery little bugger!
Richard: It was great seeing you the other night.
Richard: Oh, Im sorry. (Introduces them.) Lisa, (nodding at each) Monica, Chandler. We used to date.
Nurse: Dr. Richard Burke is out of town. Dr. Timothy Burke, his son, will see you now.
Monica: Okay, you can not tell Chandler. Okay? That I ran into Richard.
RICHARD: If I have to I'll, I'll do all again , I'll do the 4 o'clock feeding thing, I'll go to the P.T.A. meetings, I'll coach the soccer team.
Richard: (still spitting) The platoon is dead! Face facts Tony!
Chandler: If you're cooking on the stove, does that mean that your new secret boyfriend is better in bed than Richard?
Monica: What are you guys doing? (Monica hears the moaning coming from the TV and looks at it) Oh my God, is that Richard? (It only takes a split second for Joey to realise, he pulls Monica down by her jacket, and she falls, face down next to Chandler. Chandler gets up a bit, and Joey quickly covers Chandler's eyes with his hand.)
Phoebe: That’s right, I've prepared a song for Emma. From my heart to hers. For there’s no greater gift, than the gift of music. (she starts singing) Emma! Your name poses a dilemma. 'Cause not much else rhymes with Emma! Maybe the actor Richard Crenna, he played the commanding officer in Rambo. Happy birthday Emma!
(Joey and Richard both wipe their faces and are given towels.)
Joey: I dont know. Ooh, I bet its Richard.
JOEY: No no, seriously, Chandler and I were just talkin about this. He is so much cooler than our dads. [Chandler starts kicking him below the table] I mean, you know, our dad's are ok, ya know, but Richard is just- ow, ow. What are you kickin me for? Huh? I'm tryin to talk here.
(Richard thrusts, misses Joey by several feet and Joey screams in pain and drops to his knees.)
(Richard squishes a little too hard and some lands on his shirt.)
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! (She frantically tries to clean up the bedroom as Richard starts the tour.)
Joey: Well off the top of my head uhh, maybe shes having her cake and eating it too. You being the cake and Richard being the too. Or!
Richard: No! I came here to tell you something else. (Pause) I came here (Pause) to tell you I still love you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica enters her bedroom with a roll of duct tape. Richard is sitting on the bed.]
Richard: Oh shoot! Maybe next time. (yawns) Thanks for a lovely evening. (shows her out)
Richard: on the rocks with a twist? I remember. (Goes to make her drink.)
Joey: (glances at Richard) No. Nope, I uh I thI thought it might be kind of a cool character thing. Yknow? Hes uh, hes a face toucher. (Behind his back, Richard is nodding no.)
The Director: Look Joey, theres nothing I can do. Besides, youre probably gonna be out by four anyway. Weve just got one short scene. Its just you and Richard, and God knows hes a pro. Youll be fine. (Walks away and sees Richard entering.) Morning Richard.
RICHARD: Now I do. [they kiss and fall to the bed]
[Scene: The Movie Set, Richard and Joey are doing a scene.]
The Director: I dont think so. Lets take it back to Richards last line. (Walks off.) Action!
MONICA: Hey, have you guys eaten, because uh, Richard and I just finished and we've got leftovers... Chicken and potatoes... What am I wearing?...Actually, nothing but rubber gloves.
Richard: (To Joey) Are you a little off today? Its going terribly slowly.
Chandler: Richard was there so I couldnt do it!
Richard: Just the last two pages.
Chandler: Why would she use them with Richard and not me? I can be kinky! I once did a naked dance for her... with scarves!
RICHARD: Woah, woah, no wait a minute now. C'mon it's your turn. Oh c'mon. Ya know, I don't need the actual number, just a ballpark.
Monica: Yeah, I do think its better this way. (listens) Yeah, were being smart. (gets up to answer the door) (listens) Yes, Im sure.(she opens the door and its Richard)
Chandler: Because that's who I am, okay? I'm sure a mature man like Richard could see a tape like that and it wouldn't bother him. Just'd be another saucy anecdote for him to share at his men's club over brandy and moustaches.
Richard: Yeah! Youre saying, you need to be with someone more mature. Maybe someone with, a license to practice medicine. Or a mustache.