words in movies
Ross: Oh, that's right! (to Emma) Daddy and uncle Joey are going on a trip today. We're going to a conference in Barbados, right?
Ross: (to Emma) Can you say Barbados?
Ross: Ok, I gotta say. I mean, it means so much to me that you guys are coming all the way over there to hear me do my speech! UH! And I've a surprise, uh... I had to pull some strings but I was able to get everyone passes to the entire conference! That's right! (he gives them their passes) This babies will get you into all the paleontology lectures and seminars.
Chandler: Yeah Ross, I mean... we're excited to hear the speech but the rest of the time we're gonna wanna do, you know, "island's stuff".
Ross: Oh, right, because he's a scientist!
Ross: Ok, we gotta go, yeah? So, we'll see you guys tomorrow.
Ross: It's a blanket Joe, not a cloak of invisibility!
Ross: (very excited) Look at all these paleontologists!!
Ross: Wow! This is very flattering, uh...
Ross: Uh, uh... Sure! Uhm... "Dear..." (he takes the notepad)
Ross: "... Sarah. I dig you", Uh? "Doctor Ross Geller".
Ross: Yeah, oh and Sarah... I'd like to introduce you to my colleague, uh, Professor Wheeler, a-and this is Joey Tribbiani.
Ross: Dude, it's just "Days of Our Lives"... there's no the.
Joey: (thinking he's kidding) Ok, Ross! It's... It's fun, yeah! No, I-I play Doctor Drake Ramoray.
Chandler: David, let me stop you there 'cause I think I see where this is going. I'm not very good at giving advice. So if you want advice, go to Ross, Monica, or... Joey, if the thing you wanna advice about is pizza toppings or burning sensation when you pee.
(Someone knocks the door, Joey goes to open it and Ross is on the other side)
Ross: Hey!
Ross: (Excited) You're never going to guess who I just saw downstairs!
Ross: Yeah, she never misses these conferences! (then to Charlie) No, I just saw Dr. Kenneth Schwartz!
Ross: Yeah... what am I going to say to Kenneth Schwartz?
Joey: You could say: "Hey Kenny, how come you're not Britney Spears?" (looks at Ross matter-of-factly)
Ross: (to Charlie) Ready to go?
Charlie: Oh I can't... I have seminars all day and I promised Ross I would look at his speech.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: (a little embarassed by their conversation) I'm good, I have dinner plans (moves away from them).
Ross: Uh, Joe, have you looked outside?
(Ross goes to the window and opens the curtains revealing that it's raining outside)
Charlie: There's an indoor pool, you can swim there! (Ross agrees)
Joey: Everything is upside down here! It rains all day long, nobody watches tv and Ross is famous!
Chandler: That's why our honeymoon photos look like me and Diana Ross!
[Scene: Ross's hotel room. Ross and is reading his keynote speech to Charlie from his laptop]
Ross: By using CT scans and computer imaging we can in a very real way, bring the Mesozoic era into the 21st century.
Ross: Oh and you know what, it will be even better tomorrow, because I won't be constantly interrupted by Joey checking to see if they put chocolates on my pillow yet. (Someone knocks on the door, Ross goes to open and it's Joey, Rachel and Chandler).
Ross: The chocolates aren't here yet.
Charlie: Ross just read me his speech. It's fantastic!
Ross: If you want to check your email, just ask! (Chandler tries to look offended)
Ross: Wha... what do you mean? (Goes to the laptop)
Ross: What, oh my God. What did you do?
Ross: Why, why would you open it?
Ross: What did it say?
Chandler: Nude... (Ross looks at him)... pictures of Anna Kournikova. I'm so sorry.
Ross: What... what am I gonna do? My speech is gone, Chandler!
Ross: NO! I don't!!
[Time lapse: Ross looks likes he's been trying to fix his computer but just closes it as if giving up]
Ross: Yep! I'd like to thank you guys for coming down here to complain about the rain and ruin my career!
Ross: Yeah, well you should! I mean, nude pictures of Anna Kournikova? I mean, she's never even won a major tournament!
Chandler: Well, I tried Billy Jean King, but... (Ross glares at him) you know, you and Monica have the same "I'm gonna kill you" look...? I can usually make it go away by kissing her... (Ross continues to glare at him and Chandler leans in as if he's going to kiss Ross)
Ross: Get out! (Chandler runs out)
Ross: Well, what do you do?
Ross: I can't believe this. I can't believe this is happening. I have to give the keynote speech tomorrow! Ok? I have to stand up in front of all these people. What am I gonna say?
Ross: I don't think that your monologue from Star Wars is gonna help me right now, Joe!
Charlie: Ross, we can solve this. I just heard your speech. We can recreate it! We've got all night!
Ross: Wha... what you really think we can do that?
Joey: Hey don't worry about that! I mean, Ross needs you! And Rachel and I will stay and help anyway we can.
Ross: Alright, ok, let's do it. (Ross sits down at the desk and they all gather around him) Uhm, I know we start by discussing the shortcomings of carbon dating... uhm, and then, then I move on to what is clearly the defining moment of the Mesozoic era, the breakup of Pangea, hello! (Rachel and Joey look confused) And then, there's the... eh... there's the overview of the Triassic.
Joey: Oh, oh! Any chance any of this happened in a "Galaxy far, far away"? (Ross turns aroud and glares at him. Joey and Rachel decide to leave).
[Scene: Ross's room. Charlie is sitting on the bed, while Ross is walking up and down nervously]
Ross: Yeah, that's it?
Ross: Oh my God, we did it! (he sits beside her and skims through her notes excitedly)
Charlie: Actually I did it Ross. You remembered shockingly little of your own speech.
Ross: Yes, but I did make a pyramid out of the bath products. This is amazing, thank you, thank you so much. (he leans in, and they look at each other for a moment) That's a pretty necklace.
Ross: Hey, what do you say we celebrate? Champagne? (he goes to get the champagne)
Ross: Oh my God, I love you.
Ross: That's Ben, my son from my first marriage.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: No. (they clink glasses and drink)
Ross: (embarassed) Oh, it was... it's complicated, you know? She... she was... eh... gay.
Ross: Ok, odd thing to get excited about!
Ross: Hey! High-five! (they high-five)
Ross: My wife had a workout friend she went to the gym with everyday for a year. She didn't get any fitter.
Ross: I know! It's like, if you knew, why didn't you tell me, you know? I mean, call, or leave a note: "Hi, I just dropped by to say your wife's gay"
Ross: And then, you try to make the best of a bad situation, so you float the idea of a threesome?
Ross: (embarassed) Me neither.
(Ross and Charlie walk into the hall from Ross's room)
Ross and Charlie: Hey!
Charlie: (to Joey) I just left you a message! Ross and I were gonna go grab a bite, but now that you're here, maybe we can go have that dinner.
Ross: Yep, we got it, we got it. (To Charlie) Thank you so much.
Ross: Good night.
(Ross and Rachel watch them walk away and sigh. They look at each other, embarassed.)
Ross and Rachel: Ok, good night!
Ross: (from across the wall) Walls are pretty thin, guys!
[Scene: Conference room. Ross is making his keynote speech]
Ross: Then we have to await the data from recent MRI scans and DNA testing which call into question information gathered from years of simple carbon dating.
Ross: Finally, factoring the profusion of new species recently discovered: Gigantosaurus, Argentinasaurus...
Ross: And that's just the herbivores. I'm not even gonna discuss the carnivores, their heads are already too big. Which is ironic considering their stunted cerebral development.
Ross: But all kidding aside, in much the same way that Homo ergaster [1] is now thought to be a separate species from Homo erectus...
Ross: ... and while there are certainly vast differences between these Mesozoic fossiles and the example of Homo erectus...
Ross: (concluding his speech)... in a very real way we can bring the Mesozoic era into the 21st century. (pauses) Thank you!
(Everybody stands up and applauds. Ross looks flattered and surprised. His friends and other members of the audience go to congratulate him)
Ross: Oh, thanks guys!
Man with a bow tie: (shaking hands with Ross) I thought... it was wonderful!
Ross: Oh!
Man with a bow tie: Jarvis Oberblau, Cornell. (sighs) I mean, the ideas you put forth and, and from someone... so... young... and... (sighs again and smiles at Ross blissfully).
Ross: (with a frozen smile on his face, realizing something's wrong with Jarvis) Ok... now... now we're just holding hands! (pulls his hand away)
Rachel: (to Ross, in a flattering tone) It was really... great!
Ross: Oh, thank you so much!
Ross: (puzzled) Ok!... All right, thanks! Thank you so much, you guys! (to Phoebe) Oh, I can't tell you how much it means to me that you were here!
(Ross is dumbfounded to see Mike instead of David)
Ross: (skating over, embarrassed) Ok!... Uh... excuse me? Yeah?
(Ross goes towards Charlie, who's conversing with a fellow paleontologist, and touches her shoulder to get her attention)
Ross: Hey! (she turns to him) Well...? (in expectation)
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: Oh, I can't tell you how great it was to look at the crowd and see your face! I mean... uh, did you know you were (giggles) mouthing the words along with me?
Ross: No, it's ok! Made me feel like a rock star!
Ross: (joking) I'd better not found you naked in my hotel room!
(Ross giggles, but Charlie isn't amused at all.)
Ross: (realizing his joke wasn't so good, but still giggling) Look, I took it too far!
Joey: I mean, she should be with someone like... Ross! You know what I mean, he uses all those big words too! Man, smart people are dull!
Joey: Because... look, no one wants this to happen more than me, ok? (in a trembling voice) I have gone over this moment in my head a hundred times and not once did I ever say no! (sighs) I couldn't do it to Ross!
[Scene: hotel's bar, Ross and Mr. Oberblau are talking]
Ross: Ooh, well. Ah, I kinda have got a lot on my plate right now, not that I wouldn't love a weekend in the country with a strange man. (Mr. Oberblau giggles)
Mr. Oberblau: (seeing her) Oh, you're back... (to Ross) this is my wife, Nancy.
Ross: Get Out!
Charlie: Ross, can I talk to you for a minute?
Ross: Yes, please! (they move and sit down on a sofa) So, what's going on?
Ross: Oh my God, wh-what happened?
Ross: I knew that was him!
Ross: (holding her hand) Hey, you ok?
Ross: Oh, professor Clerk we're kind of in the middle of a conversation, here.
Ross: (standing) Ok, gentlemen! Please! Aren't we a little old for this? I mean, we're scientists, right? We're academics. And most importantly I... you-you will have to catch us first. (he starts to run away with Charlie). GO, GO, GO! (the paleontologists starts chasing them)
[Scene: Hotel's bar. Ross is running to Charlie trying not to be seen with two cocktails in his hands. She's hidden behind a huge plant]
Ross: Hi.
Ross: Yeah. The bartender said that they split up into two search parties, the herbivores and the carnivores. (pause) You know, we as a group are not the coolest.
(Three paleontologists walk by and Ross hugs Charlie trying not to be seen)
Ross: I don't think they saw us.
Ross: (apparently unruffled) Oh. Can I... can I ask who?
Ross: I think I know too but I've been really wrong about this stuff in the past, so...
(Charlie kisses Ross, they stop for a moment and then he kisses her back)
Ross: I'm sorry... we... we can't.
Ross: I mean, you just went out with my best friend, and I just think it'd be a really really bad idea. (pause) Or-or not! (they kiss passionately)
(Joey walks in and sees Ross and Charlie kissing. He gives a faint, rueful smile, then he seems to recollect something and suddenly he moves back to Rachel's room. He knocks on her door and she opens)
Ross: You're right, I'm sorry. Will you marry me?
Ross: (on phone) Hey.
Ross: (Bangs on the bathroom door) Emily? Emily? Im coming in. (He opens the door to reveal that the window is gone, along with Emily.)
Ross: About four hours.
Emily: Ive uh, Ive come to talk to Ross.
Ross and Rachel: Noo.
Ross: Hi.
Ross: Ohh! Thank you.
Emily: Ross, I love you!
(Ross thinks it over, finally sits down and picks up his cards.)
Ross: Hey, if mommy can have a wife, daddy can have a bra.
Ross: Okay, but do you really need another friend? I mean...
(Ross keeps staring at her, head on table. Chandler smacks him with a newspaper. Joey enters, Ross and Chandler laugh at him.)
Emily: (laughs) Ross play rugby? I dont think so.
Ross: Oh, well this morning he got a call from who I think was our cousin Nathan, and frankly, it was a little more than I needed to know.
Ross: (triumphantly) Im gonna be on TV!!
Ross: Hey!
Monica: It is not over because she is going to call you and tell you she loves you. And the reason why she couldnt, is because her feelings were so strong, it scared her. Now you go home and wait for her call, she could be calling you from the plane! Come on now go! Go! (Tries to push Ross out the door.)
Ross: Yeah? Oh-oh, shed be so excited!
Phoebe: He is! But hes getting divorcedRoss! Maybe you know him.
Ross: You had fantasies about Emily?
Ross: Oh. Whats wrong with Ross?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Sandy sit on the couch. Sandy holds Emma. Ross enters the apartment. Sandy and Rachel wipe their tears away with handkerchiefs]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is working as Phoebe and Ross are sitting on the couch.]
(knock on door, Ross opens, it's a woman)
Ross: All right, bad ankle, got it!
Rachel: Okay, but Ross, eventually you and I are gonna be dating.
Ross: So umm, any word from Susan?
Ross: Am I?!
Ross: Am I?!
Ross: Yeah, well you never have the time. I mean, I dont feel like I even have a girlfriend anymore, Rachel.
Ross: I cant believe it. (Pause) Can I tell you something? Im a little mad at him now.
Ross: Uhm... Rachel and I hired a male nanny. (Joey makes a gesture and sound like "Can you believe that?")
Molly: (to Ross) I'm gonna take her back to the appartment.
Ross: She doesnt know which one of us she wants, me or this Colin guy.
Ross: (interrupting her) Oh, it's not the ideal way...
Ross: I like this one. (Points to it.) It seems to say, "I love you and thats why I have to kill you."
Ross: What?
Ross: Oh, wake up!
Ross: Excuse me?
Ross: It does not!
Ross: Oh come on! Here we go! (picks her up and puts her in the chair) Stand by for mission countdown!
Ross: This is not fun!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's balcony, Ross is about to be attacked by Paulo's cat.]
Phoebe: Yeah. The 92 Ross wouldnt.
Mona's Date: Its awfully pink. (Ross mouths, "Its salmon!")
Ross: In this life, Phoebe.
Ross: Oh, I missed you too.
Ross: Nice luggage.
Ross: Yes, thats what I was going to ask, thank you.
Ross: Hi!
Ross: and the miracle was that that little bit of oil that shouldve just lasted just one day, burned for
Ross: You're right. Yours is worse. You are the king of bad Thanksgivings.
Ross: Hey, yknow what? This is your fault! Youre the one that didnt move his-his appointment.
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross and Julie are setting the table.]
Ross: She already lives in London.
Ross: Yeah?
[Scene: The Philly, With or Without You is playing. (Which is the same song Ross played for Rachel in TOW the List.)]
Ross: Uh, I dont know, whatever.
Ross: So, then you can stay as long as you want.
Ross: One more day, seriously/
Ross: Look sweetie, I could be the bigger man, I could be the biggest man, I could be a big, huge, giant man, and it still wouldnt make any difference, except that I could pick your Father up and say Like me! Like me tiny doctor!
[Scene: Rosss Building, they are approaching the apartment of the woman who died. Ross knocks on the door and a woman answers it.]
Ross: Yeah!! Yeah!
ROSS: Oh my God, what happened?
Ross: Is that why in junior high you were the only one that hung out with that Ukrainian kid?
Ross: Ugh, shes saying good-bye to her uncle.
Ross: I mean, why not! I mean, I mean why not?!
Ross: I dont want to do that.
Ross: Well you said you couldnt go out so.... (pulls the cover off of the basket)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone except Ross is there watching Days of Our Lives.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross is reading a letter that Chandler wrote.]
Rachel: Ohh! (Realises that Ross is in the room.) Hi!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there but Ross and Joey. Gunther hands them the bill, and Chandler gives some money to pay it.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: I know.
Ross: (not wanting to tell her) Uh-oh, uh-oh, the laundry's done. It's, uh, it's a song. The laundry song that we sing. (singing) Uh-oh the laundry's done, uh-oh, uh-oh.
Ross: What?
Ross: No, no, dont. Why dont we?
Monica: Hello. (Listens) Oh, hey Ross!
Ross: Get married.
Ross: Yes!
Ross: Is thatare you saying yes? Is that yes?
Ross: Well, where do I start? This is Julie. Julie, this is Rachel.
Ross: Oh come on! Thats-thats true.
Ross: She's not even here yet.
Ross: Come on! Come on. Come on.
Ross: Hey!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross still has boxes all over the place. Joey is wearing a football helmet, and Chandler is spinning him around in one of the chairs and counting.]
Ross: (turning around.) Umm, uh, I was just telling the guys
Ross: Yeah, well my-my ex-wife and I share custody of Ben and umm, uh, and just so you know, Carol and I are on excellent terms as Im sure you are with your wife! (Realizes) Oh, Im sorry! (To Elizabeth) Its unbelievable!
Ross: Yeah. (They hug again.)
Ross: Yeah, I guess I should. (Starts to leave.) Man, yknow what I have to realize? Maybe Im just not the type of guy women can have just one night with. Yknow, they-they always seem to want a little bit more. I should remember that. (He pauses and then exits.)
Monica: By the way, Ross dropped by a box of your stuff.
Ross: Yeahno, just that last song.
Ross: Okay, that's, that's enough. (retreats to the bathroom)
[Scene: Joey's Apartment, Joey is reading a script as Ross and Chandler enter carrying a basketball.]
Ross: Yeah, but it didnt fit. Well, luckily theres a store here that has one left in her size, but Im the groom, Im not supposed to see the dress
Ross: (entering) Hey guys!
Ross: Thank you.