words in movies
[Scene: The Hospital, Phoebe is arriving with Ross, Joey, and Rachel in tow.]
Ross: It's all right.
Nurse: Now, which of you is the father? (Points to Joey and Ross)
Ross: Hey, what took you guys so long? Your cab left when ours did!
(Both Rachel and Ross stare at her for a moment.)
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Ross are entering.]
Ross: Apparently she fell in the shower and hit her head.
Ross: Look, Pheebs-Pheebs, it's gonna be okay.
Ross: Yeah, he's head of the department.
Ross: Hello.
Rachel: What? What are you talking about?! You-you're the one who's been telling me to get over Ross and move on. I'm moving on, and you're moving on with me. Come on, give me one good reason why you don't wanna go.
[Scene: The delivery room, Chandler, Frank, and Ross are with Phoebe.]
Joey: (entering) Ross! Get a shot of this. (He's carrying an issue of the USA Today and hands Ross the camera.) Hey babies! These are the headlines on the day you were born! Okay, now girl baby turn away and boy babies (Throws the paper away to reveal a copy of Playpen, which is the TV version of Playboy Magazine.) Check it out, huh?! This is what naked women looked like the month you were born. All right, now let's dive right into the good stuff. (Joey opens the magazine and Ross sticks the camera in it.)
Ross: Hey, where are Monica and Rachel anyway?
Ross: To be fair, he doesnt seem to be impersonating Fonzie
Ross: Again, it's not that he
(Phoebe fakes pain to get Ross looking for another doctor.)
[Scene: The delivery room, Ross has returned with another doctor. This one, is well, younger.]
Ross: Okay, Phoebe, this Dr. Oberman. He has no strong feelings about Fonzie or any of the Happy Days gang.
Phoebe: (interrupting) Uh-huh, me too. Ross, maybe I should've specified that I'd be needing a grown up doctor.
Ross: (entering) Hey! I just heard. What's up?
[Cut to Joey's room, who's going throw his own contractions. Plus, he has Ross in a headlock.]
Ross: Breathe! Breathe! Breathe throw the pain.
Joey: I want the drugs Ross, I want the drugs! (He starts rocking back and forth, taking Ross with him.)
Ross: I do too! I do too!
Ross: Argh!
Ross: Argh!
[Cut to Joey's room, his doctor and Ross are there.]
Ross: You did it, man.
Joey: They're so small! (Both he and Ross look at them with satisfied looks on their faces.)
[Scene: The delivery room, everyone except Rachel is there. Phoebe, Monica, and Ross are holding the babies.]
Ross: Hey! Its 42-21!
(Ross flounders.)
Monica: Hey, hey, look. Look Ross, Ben drew a picture of you! (Shows him Ben's picture.) Huh? You're-you're a cowboy!
Ross: Yeah, most of it it's a place packed with confused angry baseball fans!
Ross: (entering) Uh fellas, (Does the maneuver and gives them a double thumbs up, which Chandler returns as he closes the door.)
Ross: And what did he ask you not to call him?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Sandy is knitting baby clothes. Ross and Rachel walk into the living room.]
Ross: Let go! Let go!
Ross: Yeah, losers talk!
Joey: (He turns around to Chandler looking for approval to go with Rachel, Chandler mouths Come on!) (turning back to Rachel) Ross, did ask us first, and we set that night aside.
Ross: Oh, thank you. (She goes to kiss him, but he holds her coat up between their faces to stop her.) Hey, hey. (opens the door, sees Rachel, and hides Chloe behind the door) Rachel!!!!
Ross: No! You let go!
Ross: Gimme the this!
Rachel: (entering) Hey Ross? Umm, I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway and-and uh, you must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought.
Ross: I know. I feel horrible. Okay.
Ross: Okay, y'know what, lets just cut to the chase here. Okay? Heidi, which of my boys do you like?
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah, Sarah, anything.
ROSS: As in, "I now pronounce you wife and wife" married?
Ross: We make a great foursome. We should do more stuff together. Ooh! Let's take a trip. Okay, where do you think we - we can go?
Ross: (puts away his wallet) And what is second prize?
ROSS: Oh, man. Oh, remember when I stuck that broom in your bike spokes, and you flipped over and hit your head on the curb?
Ross: Hi, Im selling Brown Bird cookies.
(She takes her hand off Erica. Ross enters the room)
Ross: All right!!
Ross: Well, that makes sense.
Ross: Mon?
Ross: Ill tell you what Mon, Ill give you the first box for free.
ROSS: Cannot feel my tounge.
Ross and Rachel: Oh!
Ross: ....and 12, 22, 18, four... (Chandler starts laughing) What?
Chandler: Yes, yes, its just that we ah, we kinda all ready, made plans with Ross.
Ross: It makes him miss the bowl, but whatever.
Ross: Okay, remember, we were young. Hey, Spring break, sophomore year, I got high in my bedroom and my parents walked in and smelled it and so I told them that you had gotten stoned and jumped out the window.
Ross: Well hey, who did these resumes for ya?
Ross: Its not a library...
Ross: What, that wasnt the great news?
Ross: (stopping quickly) Oh umm, theres also a book here by a woman named Wendy Bagina. (They both laugh, but stop when the hear moaning coming from the next aisle.) What is that?
Ross: I dont have too. I can just look at you.
ROSS: You, you know I, I don't, have a- have a problem with that.
Carol: Let it go, Ross.
[He opens the window, Ross comes in, soaked.]
Ross: Hi there!
Ross: (to himself) Not nice enough.
Ross: (to Phoebe) Sure, your dresser is missing but this she notices.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross are there.]
Ross: That's funny...Do you think you'll ever work again?
Ross: That word was swans.
Ross: Whats a scrud?
Ross: No.
Ross: My first time with Carol was... (He mumbles the last part)
ROSS: Ah?� (Mike nods.� Another pause.)� Well, he and I would probably have a lot to talk about.
Chandler: My Catholic friend is right. She's distraught. You're there for her. You pick up the pieces, and then you usher in the age of Ross! (Ross and Chandler look off into the distance. Joey, wondering what they are looking at, looks in the same direction)
Ross: Well I I told him that if he ever hurt you I would hunt him down and kick his ass! (The girls all laugh.) What?! What?! What is the matter with everybody?! I am serious! I would kick his ass! (The laugh harder.)
Joey: Ross and Rachel left us a message saying they were getting married! Isnt that why you guys are here?
Ross: No, I fold. (lays cards down, and gets up)
Ross: Hey Chandler, theres a party tomorrow, youll feel better then.
Ross: Nice to see you again Dr. Green.
Phoebe: Him? Him, Ross?
Phoebe: Ross, went to get a cab so we can all... No, wh-what are you doing! No, Monica, no!
Ross: I dont know, something girlie.
Rachel: Oh yeah! (She gasps.) Oh my God! That is our friend! (Monica covers her face.) It's Naked Ross! (Monica turns and buries her face in Chandler's shoulder.)
ROSS: Let's, let's take this outside? Who talks like that?
Ross: Well you sure used a large font.
Ross: (To Phoebe) Hey Pheebs! How's that uh, vegetarian pizza working out for ya? You and those vegetables have a real thing going on, huh?
Ross: Okay, the other night I was leaving the museum just as Laser Floyd was letting out of the planetarium, without even trying I sold 50 boxes! Thats when it occurred to me, the key to my success, the munchies. So I ah, started hitting the NYU dorms around midnight. I am selling cookies by the case. They call me: 'Cookie Dude!'
ROSS: Uh, excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe. Evolution is scientific fact, like, like, like the air we breathe, like gravity.
Ross: Hi!
Ross: Wow!
Ross: Phoebe, you cant get out of this! Okay? You have to learn how to ride a bike!
Ross: Hey, Joey. Are men ever nice to strange women for no reason?
[Joey and Ross go back out into the main area.]
Ross: Uh-huh.
Ross: Huh. Sounds like Mark Something wants to have some sex.
Ross: Thats excellent.
Ross: Hi.
[Another group of flashbacks begin with Episode 513: The One With Joeys Bag. Joey is carrying the bag and has entered Central Perk to the amusement of Ross and Chandler.]
Ross: Flip me for it? No, no, no... heads, heads, heads!
(Cut to Ross and Monica)
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Emily? Emily! Oh my God! Oh my God, it's Emily! (He picks up a lamp and hands it to Chandler, for no reason.) It's Emily everyone! Shush-shush-shhst! (to Emily) Hi!
Ross: It was, it was great. Oh, what happened?
Ross: Hey, Joey.
Ross: Thats okay.
Ross: (answering it) 1987, the day after Christmas, at Sean McMahons party. I played you one of my songs, yknow Interplanetary Courtship Ritual.
Phoebe: This is everybody. This is Ross.
Ross: Mary-Angela.
Ross: Come here. (he hugs Rachel) Listen, you deserve so much better than him...you know, I mean, you, you, you should be with a guy who knows what he has when he has you.
Ross: Ah, which, which one?
Ross: Well I had a great time! Umm, Chancy on the other hand
Ross: Ya wanna hang back and take our own cab?
Ross: (to Rachel) Oh hey! Hey uh, you remember the necklace I gave you last year? Can I see it?
Ross: Its okay. Come, come on in.
[Scene: Rosss, the gang, minus Rachel of course, is there. Chandler is forced to smoke by an open window.]
Ross: That is so made up!
Ross: There you go.
Ross: No.
Ross: Well, yeah!
ROSS: Oh, see from where I was sitting I uh. . .
Ross: (shyly) You grow up.