words in movies
Ross: Nono, me neither. Although, uh, y'know, back in college, Susan Sallidor did.
Ross: No. No, it's just 'cause, uh, I kinda wanted to go out with her too, so I told her, actually, you were seeing Bernie Spellman... who also liked her, so...
(Joey congratulates Ross, sees Chandler's look and abruptly stops.)
Chandler: Ross is smart and funny, d'you ever think that about him?
Ross: (to Joey) So he's calling from Rome. I could do that. Just gotta go to Rome.
Monica: Hey dad, what's up? (Listens) Oh God. Ross, it's Nana.
[Scene: The Hospital, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there, along with Aunt Lillian. Ross and Monica enter and everyone says hi and kisses.)
Ross: So, uh, how's she doing?
(Monica strides over to Ross, who is making coffee, and talks to him aside.)
Ross: Okay, relax, relax. We are gonna be here for a while, it looks like, and we still have boyfriends and your career to cover.
Ross: Oh! ...Yeah, they were gross. Oh, you know what I loved? Her Sweet 'n' Los. How she was always stealing them from- from restaurants.
(Everyone stands up. Cut to Ross and Monica in Nana's room.)
Ross: She looks so small.
Ross: Well, at least she's with Pop-Pop and Aunt Phyllis now.
Ross: Bye, Nana.
(He goes to kiss her but she moves. Monica screams. Ross shouts and stares in disbelief. Monica runs out of the room.)
Monica: Ross!
(Ross runs out too.)
Ross: Y'know how-how the nurse said that-that Nana had passed? Well, she's not, quite..
Ross: She's not- past, she's present, she's back.
Ross: I, uh, I'll go see. (He goes in)
(Nana passes for the second time and the nurse pulls the blanket over her. Ross and Monica go to tell the family)
Ross: Now she's passed.
(Monica and Ross enter.)
Ross: Twice.
Ross: I dunno, it's weird. I mean, I know she's gone, but I just don't feel, uh...
Ross: Nono, she's gone.
[Scene: Nana's house, Ross, Mrs. Geller and Aunt Lillian are going through clothes.]
Ross: I thought it was gonna be a closed casket.
Ross: (sarcastic) I don't see why not.
Ross: Here's my retainer!
[Scene: Nana's Bedroom, Ross is holding a dress out from inside the closet.]
Ross: (holding a dress out from inside the closet) This one?
Ross: I have shown you everything we have. Unless you want your mother to spend eternity in a lemon yellow pant-suit, go with the burgundy.
Ross: Oh! A fine choice. I'm coming out. (Starts to climb over the furniture)
(Ross falls back inside)
Ross: Okay. Um, how about these? (Holds out a pair)
Ross: And where she's going everyone else'll be dressier?
Ross: (forages around) Okay, I have nothing in an evening shoe in the burgundy. I can show you something in a silver that may work.
Ross: No! Nonono, wait a sec. I may have something in the back.
Ross: Oh my God..
Ross: Yeah, just... just Nana stuff.
Ross: (entering) How we doing, you guys ready?
Ross: Some days it's all I can think about.
Ross: What, we-uh- we don't have shoes here, or...?
Ross: Oh, I hope they're not ruined.
Ross: I know, uh, the air, the-the trees... even though Nana's gone there's, there's something almost, uh- I dunno, almost life-aff- (Not looking where he is going he falls into an open grave)
All: God! Ross!
Ross: I'm fine. Just-just... having my worst fear realised...
[Scene: The Wake, at the Gellers' house. Ross is lying on his back, with Phoebe squatting over him, checking to see if he's injured.]
Ross: What, what is it?
Ross: Oh! No-n-
Mrs. Geller: Here, sweetie, here. I took these when I had my golfing accident. (Hands Ross a bottle of pills. Then turns to Monica and pats her hair over her ears)
(They shake hands. Cut to Ross emerging from a hallway, grinning inanely. He is obviously very stoned)
Ross: I feel great. I feel- great, I fleel great.
Ross: Not the first two, but the second two- woooo! ...I love you guys. You guys are the greatest. I love my sister (Kisses Monica), I love Pheebs... (Hugs her)
Ross: ...Chandler!
Ross: (hugs him) And listen, man, if you wanna be gay, be gay. Doesn't matter to me.
Ross: Rachel. Rachel Rachel. (Sits down beside her) I love you the most.
Ross: No.
Ross: Oh.. you don't get it! (Passes out and slumps across her)
Rachel: (still trapped under Ross) Pheebs, could you maybe hand me a cracker?
Ross: That little naked guy would be me.
Ross: Yes, yes, fine, that is my penis. Can we be grown-ups now?
Ross: Got me.
Ross: Looks like a fun gang. (They all look at each other and smile)
Ross: (looking) Nono, that would be me again. I'm, uh, just trying something.
Ross: Thank you so much for that gift!
Ross: (Watching Marcel and talking to Rachel) I wanted this to work so much. I mean I'm still in there, changing his diapers, pickin' his fleas... but he's just phoning it in. Just so hard to accept the fact that something you love so much doesn't love you back.
Ross: Yknow this is actually not a great time for me.
Ross: Sure.
(Ross, Chandler and Monica are in the kitchen area)
Phoebe: So! Ross doesnt really decorate his tree with floss, but you dont hear him complaining do you? God! (Phoebe hits her guitar which wakes up Ross with a start.)
(The phone rings, Ross picks up)
Ross: Joey! You're in charge, ok? You make sure nobody leaves! (leaves)
Ross (stops recording): Ok, cut! Great. That was... that was just... yeah!
Ross: Look at you two, bonding, making us late for the airport so
Chandler: (aside, to Ross) What!? They are totally ripping us off!
Ross: You're right. There isn't a decent outlet.
Ross: Yeah, well... I think I know how to dazzle him.
Ross: Oh wow! I mean, wow! I mean, I-I-I think shes cute but I-I would never have thought of going out with her, never!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is trying to comfort Chandler. Joey is absent.]
Ross: RACHEL!
Ross: Yeah?
Chandler: (To Ross) Okay, you get her in here. (To Joey) You bolt the door. Ill be in the closet.
Ross: (sarcastically) I can't believe they gave you a ticket. You're such a good driver.
Ross: Rach, she's not going to remember this.
Ross: Mississippilesly? (pause) Well, how bad is it?
Ross: (looks back at the cake) Hey!
Joey: So, did you bring a little something for Ross?
Ross: It's not bad.
Rachel: Well, there is one thing that we havent tried, but someone thinks that, (mimicking Ross) "That will open up a can of worms."
Ross: (recognizing her) Oh my God! Rachel Green?
Phoebe: Hey, are Ross and Rachel back?
Ross: (To Phoebe) Im sorry. Ugh, Pheebs, you were, you were right about her. Yknow, she did try to use sex as a weapon! Yeah, I hurt my back a little.
Joey: (to Ross and Rachel) I've been here the whole time!
(Ross and Rachel enter.)
Ross: What's wrong? Are you okay?
Ross: Okay, you ready?
[Scene: Professor Sherman's office, Ross is relating to Professor Sherman]
[Scene: Ross, Charlie and Professor Spafford are sitting at the table in a restaurant]
Ross: (surprised) Oh... (he pauses) (sounds disappointed) Ohh... I'd love to but I really have to grade these papers.
Ross: Damnit!
Ross: (Writing on the papers) B, B, B, B, B!
Ross: Hey...
Ross: (he opens the door) Hi Amy!
(Ross enters the apartment with Amy)
Ross: Well, it had some good ideas, take off your shirt.
Ross: (gives up) Yes, yes, you did.
Ross: Ehm... Her name is Emma.
Joey: What? No! No Ross! No-no! Stop! Im not jumping! Okay, look I have an audition tomorrow and I cant go if I break my leg.
Ross: (to Joey) Oh my God!
Ross: Why don't you use your Thesaurus?
Ross: What... what you working on?
Ross: Okay, Phoebe, this Dr. Oberman. He has no strong feelings about Fonzie or any of the Happy Days gang.
Ross: Uhh, yes I did but there isn't. Okay, here we go.
Ross: Oh nice tan!
[Scene: Joey’s Apartment. Ross is filming his parents ]
Monica: He was in Rosss class marching band kinda overweight? Well, really overweight. I mean I was his thin friend.
Ross: (in his head) Say something clever! (Pause.) Okay, doesnt have to be clever, it just has to be words. Say some words. (Pause) Any words will do. (Pause) Oh my God! This is the longest that anyone has not talked ever! (Pause) There is nothing you can say to make this worse!! So just say something!! (Pause.) (To her) I-I, I uh havent had sex in a very long time. (She leaves.) (In his head) Yeah, you really shouldnt have said anything.
RACHEL: Ross, Ross, please listen to me. Ross, you are so much better for me than Paolo ever was. I mean you care about me, you're loving, you make me laugh.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is coming out of the living room carrying his salad and a puzzlebeer! Cold beer. And he decides to fold up Phoebes massage table, but being Ross has trouble with it as there is a knock on the door. He sets the table back up and opens the door to reveal a beautiful woman.]
Ross: Do you perhaps seeing a note on top of it?
Ross: (embarassed) Me neither.
Ross: Look, this is hard enough! I really need you guys right now.
Ross: Seriously?
Joey: Fine, I'll rent a car and drive...! Ross, you have to get that job!
Ross: Well, do you wanna marry him?
Ross: No, I barely even got to three Mississippi.
Ross: Um, I do not want her baby-sitting our child.
Ross: I don't think that's what this is.
Ross: I... I don't know..
Ross: I loved this place! To tell you the truth, I wish I didn't have to move.
(Ross enters)
Ross: (sees how strangely Monica, Chandler and Rachel are looking at him) What?
Ross: Hey guys. Monica and Chandler: Hi Ross.
Joey: But Ross, Ross. What do you, what do you think she's going to say?
[Monica and Chandler both are shocked. Ross gives Monica a take that! look.]
[Scene: Outside the Nursery, Ross is looking at Emma as Phoebe walks up.]
Ross: Why not?
Ross: Do you remember the scene with, um, Jabba the Hut? Well Jabba had as, as his prisoner, um, Princess Leia.
Ross: (in his head) Shes your cousin. Shes your cousin! If she knew what was going on in your head shed think you were sick! (She grabs some popcorn.) Or would she? Lets back up a second. She was the one who suggested opening a bottle of wine. She was the one who turned down the lights. She was the one that wanted to rent Logans Run, the sexiest movie ever. (She grabs the blanket from behind him and looks at him.) Oh, I know that look. Forget it. I want it. She wants it. Im going in.
Ross: That's not a thing!
Ross: Listen, you are hearing one side of the story, okayand F.Y.I she mustve shown Kyle over 30 paint samples before she painted that room! And his response to each one was, "I dont give a tiny rats ass."
Ross: Hey Mon, that was really nice of you to loan Rachel your car so she could go and get the cake.
(Amy looks at Ross, angrily. Rachel clearly doesn't understand what he meant and looks at Ross who gestures "later".)
Ross: I can't believe you'd rather go out with him than me.
Ross: Pheebs, what's wrong?
Ross: Hey! (she turns to him) Well...? (in expectation)
Ross: Of course you would, your brains are smaller than mine!! (Rachel nods) Man, I can't compete with the guys she goes out with, they are so out of my league! oh my God!
Ross: I have to talk to her about this groomsman situation, ok? I'm not gonna watch Chandler up there while I'm sitting in the seats like some chump! (he goes to Rachel's room, knocks the door and enters the room). (very fake gasp) Oh! My God! You're breathtaking!
Ross: (to Charlie) Hey!
Ross: Yeah. Why?
Ross: Your ex-boyfriend?
Ross: Well, if you think it would help.
Ross: Ok, now, is there anything I can do to... you know, butter him up? Anything he really likes?
Ross: We'll see how dinner goes.
Ross: (taping Joey with the cam) Hey, there is uncle Joey!
Ross: How come its always us left in the field holding the ball?
[Sequence 4: Ross hikes the ball to Chandler, and the camera pans down to show Rachel standing deep in the end zone, playing with her gum. Something hits her on the head and she looks up to see where it came from.]
RACH: Oh my God. Oh my God Ross, no, hang up the phone, give me the phone Ross, give me the phone, give me the phone, give me the. . . [jumps the couch and lands on Ross's back, finally getting the phone from him. Ross has a confused expression on his face.]
(They disappear into the bedroom leaving Ross standing in the living room holding Susans coat.)
Ross: I'm ok.
Ross: Perhaps I can persuade you. What if you can give your son this (Takes a huge egg out of his back) genuine pterodactyl egg (whispers) replica.
Benjamin (to Ross): You weren't there!
Ross: What?
Ross: Did you just say "break up with Charlie"?