words in movies
RACH: Ross kissed me.
[Scene: Ross' apartment. Ross, Chandler, and Joey are there eating pizza.]
ROSS: And, uh, and then I kissed her.
ROSS: Yeah.
[Ross enters, distraught.]
ROSS: Hi.
ROSS: That, that is funny. That is painfully funny. No, wait. Wait, yeah, that's just painful
ROSS: Yeah, it was, but...I get home, ok, and I see Julie's saline solution on my night table. And I'm thinking to myself, oh my god, what the hell am I doing? I mean, here I am, I am with Julie, this incredible, great woman, who I care about and who cares about me, and I'm like, what, am I just gonna throw all that away?
ROSS: Believe me, I've been dreaming about me and Rachel for ten years now. But now, I'm with Julie, so it's like me and Julie, me and Rachel, me and Julie, me and... [Rachel enters, carrying a tray]... Rachel. Rachel, Rachel.
RACH: [to Ross] Hey, you.
ROSS: How are you?
ROSS: Good.
ROSS: Hi, Julie. [nervous] Hi, Julie. Julie, um, how are you?
ROSS: [uncomfortable] Good, so everybody's here. Everybody's good. So, were you gonna play something, Phoebe?
ROSS: [impatient] Play it.
ROSS: [to Joey] Ssshh.
[Ross and Rachel look at each other and then at Phoebe, realizing the song is about their situation.]
RACH: Did uh, Ross call?
RACH: Why didn't he call? He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? He's gonna stay with her and she's going to be all, "Hi, I'm Julie, Ross picked me, and we're gonna to get married, have a lot of kids and dig up stuff together."
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Ross is up in arms about the Rachel/Julie situation.]
ROSS: I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like a complete nightmare.
JOEY: Hey, here's a thought, Ross. [reaches for the computer]
JOEY: Ross, listen. I got two words for you. Threesome.
[Ross gives him an insulted look.]
ROSS: Can't we just use a pen?
ROSS: I don't know. I mean, all right, I guess you can say she's a little spoiled sometimes.
ROSS: And I guess, you know, sometimes, she's a little ditzy, you know. And I've seen her be a little too into her looks. Oh, and Julie and I, we have a lot in common 'cause we're both paleontologists, but Rachel's just a waitress.
ROSS: I don't know.
ROSS: [long pause] She's not Rachel.
[Ross enters with a melancholy look.]
JOEY: [to Ross] Hey, so how'd it go with Julie? Did you, did you break her heart?
ROSS: Yes, it was horrible. She cried. I cried. She threw things, they hit me. Anyway, I did the right thing.
RACH: Hey, do you guys have...[sees Ross, pauses]...hi.
ROSS: Hi.
ROSS: I uh, I just got back from uh, from Julie's.
ROSS: No, no, uh, it's not what you think. It's um the other thing.
[Joey is looking at Rachel, smiling, and gesturing his head towards Ross.]
ROSS: Well, uh.
ROSS: Really. It's always been you, Rach.
[Ross and Rachel hug.]
ROSS: I know, I know, it's, it's almost...[turns around, sees Chandler and Joey] What do you say we go take a walk, just us, not them?
ROSS: Ok. No, hey, whoa, whoa, I'll get your coat.
[Ross leaves.]
[Ross walks back in, Rachel's coat in hand.]
ROSS: Hey, someone order a coat?
RACH: Ross, Chandler wrote something about me on his computer and he won't let me see.
ROSS: He won't? [remembers what it is] He won't! Because, isn't that, isn't that the, the short story you were writing?
CHAN, JOEY, ROSS: No!
[Ross and Chandler stare angrily at Joey, who thinks he has come up with a good idea.]
ROSS: That's it? That's all you wrote? You're the worst writer in the whole world.
ROSS: No, you don't.
RACH: What is this? Ross, what is this?
ROSS: Ok, just, just remember how crazy I am about you, ok?
ROSS: Now that's a little spoiled. He was supposed to type "little", the idiot.
ROSS: No, that, that was, I mean, as opposed to uh, the uh, ok. Is this over yet Rach?
[Rachel leaves, and Ross follows her into the hall.]
ROSS: No, no, wait, ok, ok, look at the other side. Look at Julie's column.
ROSS: No, Rach, come on. Rach! Rach, no, no! She's not Rachel, she is, she is not, Ra--Rachel?
PHOE: I... I cannot believe Ross even made this list. What a dinkus.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting on the couch, eating candy. It is raining out. Ross climbs up the fire escape and is knocking on the window.]
ROSS: Rach! Whoops! Rach, hey, open up, please!
RACH: [coldly] When somebody does not buzz you in, Ross, that means go away. That doesn't mean please climb up the fire escape.
ROSS: I just wanna read something. It's your pro list.
ROSS: [reading his list] Ok, ok, number one: The way you cry at game shows. Number two: how much you love your friends. Number three: the way you play with your hair when you're nervous. Number four: how brave you are for starting your life over. Number five: how great you are with Ben.
ROSS: Number six: the way you smell.
JOEY: [opens the drapes] Hey, Ross! What are you doin'?
ROSS: Hey, Joey. You wanna open the window?
[He opens the window, Ross comes in, soaked.]
ROSS: I am, uh, I am...
[Ross runs to Rachel's bedroom, knocking on the door.]
ROSS: Rach, come on, open up. Rach, come on, come on, Rach. You got to give me another chance.
ROSS: No?
ROSS: Rach, come on, look, I know how you must feel.
RACH: [near tears] No, you don't, Ross. Imagine the worst things you think about yourself. Now, how would you feel if the one person that you trusted the most in the world not only thinks them too, but actually uses them as reasons not to be with you.
ROSS: No, but, but I wanna be with you in spite of all those things.
RACH: Oh, well, that's, that's mighty big of you, Ross. [to the others] I said don't go!
ROSS: You know what? You know what? If, things were the other way around, there's nothing you could put on a list that would ever make me not want to be with you.
[She closes the door in his face. Ross walks sullenly back to the couch and sits down. A moment of silence ensues.]
JOEY: [quietly] I never know how long you're supposed to wait in this type of a situation before you can talk again, you know? [Ross stares blankly at him] Maybe a little longer.
[Ross is at his apartment.]
ROSS: Hi.
MNCA: [to Ross] Listen, I... I don't think this is the best time.
ROSS: Look, can, can you do something for me?
RADIO: The next one's dedicated to Rachel from Ross. Rachel, he wants you to know he's deeply sorry for what he did and he hopes you can find it in your heart to forgive him. (With or Without You plays)
[Rachel seems touched. She pauses for a moment, then picks up the phone and starts to dial. Cut to Ross at his apartment.]
RADIO: Uh, we've just gotten a call from Rachel, and she told us what Ross did. It's pretty appalling, and Ross, if you're listening, I don't wanna play your song anymore. Why don't we devote our time to a couple that stands a chance? Avery, Michelle's sorry she hit you with her car and she hopes you two will work it out.
Ross: Monica's crying. She's very upset about this whole Clunkers thing.
Elizabeth: This is my father, Paul Stevens. Dad, this is Ross Geller.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebes, Ross is on the phone, as Phoebe is walking by carrying a lamp.]
Ross: Oh really! Why is that?
Phoebe: Oh Ross, calm down, Ill give you the 80 cents. (Ross glares at Rachel)
Rachel: (holds a pair of panties in front of Ross) Ok, Well, what about these are white cotton panties. Would they go with whites or delicates?
Ross: You sure?
Ross: (pauses) I know.
Ross: Yes! Yes! Yes!! (Everyone stands and claps.)
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: (shocked) What?!
Ross: Phoebe! You and I have never played chess!
Ross: That is so unfair!
Ross: Ohh.
Ross: Years and years ago there were these people called the Maccabees...
Ross: You like it?
Ross: Wha-what?
(Ross enters.)
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: Ahh.
Ross: Y'know what I didnt wear this suit for a year because you hated it. Well, guess what? Youre not my girlfriend anymore so...
Phoebe: (gasps) Oh my God Ross!!
ROSS: Oh, mine too. Isn't that neat, scotch neat. Would you excuse me? [walks out in the hallway, Mr. Greene is walking out of Chandler and Joey's apartment] Hey, hey, where you uh, sneakin off to mister?
Ross: Phoebe really likes the bike huh?
Ross: Wait a minute, she was walking the bike? Both times?
Ross: By the way, the week before your wedding you may not see a lot of me. (She glares at him and he quickly makes his way to Phoebes room.)
Monica: Sounds like you need to think about what you want, talk to Gavin, and you definitely should talk to Ross
ROSS: Look, you wanna get off my back?
Ross: No!
Ross: All right. Feel good?
Ross: Thats it, your doing great.
Ross: I swear!
Phoebe: So far, it kinda blows. I dont know, I just thought y'know that hed feel more like a brother y'know, like you and Ross, just like close and connected and....
Ross: Hum...So...hum...Oh hey I noticed you were reading the paper...another flood in Europe? Here�s a question: "Would you...would you rather drown or be burnt alive?"
Ross: Need some help?
Ross: I-I just thought you were doing so well. I
Rachel: And uh, yeah, I didnt really, I didnt want to say anything, but it kinda it just, it kinda kept coming back to me, and umm, remember we were in the casino and for some reason thought it would be funny to eat a lot of grapes. And uh, and I thought it would be funnier if we got married. So as a, as a compromise we decided first to get married, and then (Ross joins in) to eat a lot of grapes. So umm, sorry I got us into this mess.
Ross: (Watching Marcel play with Phoebe. To Chandler) Look at him. I'm not saying he has to spend the whole evening with me, but at least check in.
Ross: (loosening his tie) Oh, who cares?
Ross: Phoebe.
PHOEBE: Uh, Ross, those are the only lines we have, sorry. OK, you guys, once more.
Ross: Great! Great! (He runs to the door.) Youre making the bike very happy.
Monica: (trying desperately to change the subject) So, Ross, what's going on with you? Any stories? (Digs her elbow into his hand.) No news, no little anecdotes to share with the folks?
Phoebe: What?! (Ross rings the bell.) What the hell?!
Ross: Rach, you don't have to call whenever you have a little question, okay? Trust me, I know this.
Joey: We love you, man. (Kisses Ross)
Ross: Come here to me. No-no, you come here to me.
Ross: Hey, theres uh, some people outside, askin about candy.
MRS. GELLER: [to Ross on the stairs] I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
Ross: Oh, no, it's great. It's great. He is... He is an amazing guy.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is getting ready for his date with Kristen.]
Ross: Hey! Whats up?
Ross: So listen uh, I know you and I havent really had a chance to talk since uh, Emily and I decided to get married, and uh, I was just wondering how you were.
Ross: Well, y'know, these people are pros. They know what they're doing, they take their time, they get the job done.
Ross: Pheebs, what, is it the age thing?
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: Hmm.
Ross: Oh thanks!
Ross: Ohio!! Thank you!
Ross: Im sorry, okay, Im sorry. I wa-I was disgusted with myself, and this morning I was so, I was so upset and then I got your message and I was so happy, and all I wanted was to get her out of my apartment as fast as possible.
Ross: Phoebe, you cant massage people in my apartment!
Ross: (disappointed) Yes! Santa's coming!
Ross: I am dressed.
Ross: Its a great class.
(Monica opens the door to Ross and Rachel.)
Ross: Unless (Rachel groans.) You anticipated that I would figure all this out and you know that it actually is a girl, and you really do want her to be named Ruth! Well, Im not falling for that! Okay? Ruth is off the table!
Ross: (on phone) Hello? Hi.
Ross: Well I uh, I skipped forth grade.
Ross: Hey!
Ross: I gotta get to work.
Ross: Oh, come on, Rach, he's a guy!
Ross: No, these are my pants.
MONICA: Damnit Ross, get your butt out of the bathroom.
Ross: (to Monica) Santa was unavailable so close to Christmas.
Ross: Because its the highest. (Joey shrugs his shoulders) Okay, Rachel youre up first. (Rachel stands up and gets ready.) Situation No. 1: Youre with Monica, the wedding is about to start when Monica gets cold feet. Go! (Joey is playing the part of Monica.)
Ross: Yeah!
Ross: (gasps) You are? Me, too!
Ross: What are you doing here, Santa?
Ross: Thank you, but, but you gotta leave.
Ross: Thats right.
[Ross turns around and walks back to Ben.]
(Ross opens the door to reveal Whitney standing there.)
[Scene: N.Y.Us University Library, Ross is entering with Chandler.]
Ross: Fine, I-I give up. Santa, Santa can stay.
Ross: Bummer.
MONICA: Not that, this, US. Oh my God, Ross, you-re, you're, it's jus-, you-, ever sin- you been here.
Ross: Well, I thought it first, Holmes.
ROSS: I'm tellin' you. You can't do this.
Ross: Yeah?
Chandler: Your parents caught Ross smoking pot in college and he blamed it on me!
Ross: Thats right, and thats why we celebrate Hanukkah today. The end.
Ross: Years and years ago there were these people called the Maccabees...
Ross: Oh you guys, I-I really think just one of us should go out there so she's not overwhelmed...
Ross: Thanks. (Phoebe gets up to get a refill.) (To Monica) Oh! So for tomorrow, do you want to rent a car and drive down together or what?
Ross: Oh Donald that-that would be great. I am totally ready to come back to work. IWhat? (He notices something through the window.) No! Wh What are you doing?!! (Dr. Ledbetter is slowly backing away.) GET OFF MY SISTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ross: No.
Ross: Look, I am totally, totally over her, OK, I just... (Rachel comes over, Ross lays head on table): Hiiii!
Ross: Oh yeah? What are you gonna do?
Ross: Yknow, she tried to undress me too.
Ross: Cousin Frannies wedding, its tomorrow night.