words in movies
RACH: Ross kissed me.
[Scene: Ross' apartment. Ross, Chandler, and Joey are there eating pizza.]
ROSS: And, uh, and then I kissed her.
ROSS: Yeah.
[Ross enters, distraught.]
ROSS: Hi.
ROSS: That, that is funny. That is painfully funny. No, wait. Wait, yeah, that's just painful
ROSS: Yeah, it was, but...I get home, ok, and I see Julie's saline solution on my night table. And I'm thinking to myself, oh my god, what the hell am I doing? I mean, here I am, I am with Julie, this incredible, great woman, who I care about and who cares about me, and I'm like, what, am I just gonna throw all that away?
ROSS: Believe me, I've been dreaming about me and Rachel for ten years now. But now, I'm with Julie, so it's like me and Julie, me and Rachel, me and Julie, me and... [Rachel enters, carrying a tray]... Rachel. Rachel, Rachel.
RACH: [to Ross] Hey, you.
ROSS: How are you?
ROSS: Good.
ROSS: Hi, Julie. [nervous] Hi, Julie. Julie, um, how are you?
ROSS: [uncomfortable] Good, so everybody's here. Everybody's good. So, were you gonna play something, Phoebe?
ROSS: [impatient] Play it.
ROSS: [to Joey] Ssshh.
[Ross and Rachel look at each other and then at Phoebe, realizing the song is about their situation.]
RACH: Did uh, Ross call?
RACH: Why didn't he call? He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? He's gonna stay with her and she's going to be all, "Hi, I'm Julie, Ross picked me, and we're gonna to get married, have a lot of kids and dig up stuff together."
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Ross is up in arms about the Rachel/Julie situation.]
ROSS: I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like a complete nightmare.
JOEY: Hey, here's a thought, Ross. [reaches for the computer]
JOEY: Ross, listen. I got two words for you. Threesome.
[Ross gives him an insulted look.]
ROSS: Can't we just use a pen?
ROSS: I don't know. I mean, all right, I guess you can say she's a little spoiled sometimes.
ROSS: And I guess, you know, sometimes, she's a little ditzy, you know. And I've seen her be a little too into her looks. Oh, and Julie and I, we have a lot in common 'cause we're both paleontologists, but Rachel's just a waitress.
ROSS: I don't know.
ROSS: [long pause] She's not Rachel.
[Ross enters with a melancholy look.]
JOEY: [to Ross] Hey, so how'd it go with Julie? Did you, did you break her heart?
ROSS: Yes, it was horrible. She cried. I cried. She threw things, they hit me. Anyway, I did the right thing.
RACH: Hey, do you guys have...[sees Ross, pauses]...hi.
ROSS: Hi.
ROSS: I uh, I just got back from uh, from Julie's.
ROSS: No, no, uh, it's not what you think. It's um the other thing.
[Joey is looking at Rachel, smiling, and gesturing his head towards Ross.]
ROSS: Well, uh.
ROSS: Really. It's always been you, Rach.
[Ross and Rachel hug.]
ROSS: I know, I know, it's, it's almost...[turns around, sees Chandler and Joey] What do you say we go take a walk, just us, not them?
ROSS: Ok. No, hey, whoa, whoa, I'll get your coat.
[Ross leaves.]
[Ross walks back in, Rachel's coat in hand.]
ROSS: Hey, someone order a coat?
RACH: Ross, Chandler wrote something about me on his computer and he won't let me see.
ROSS: He won't? [remembers what it is] He won't! Because, isn't that, isn't that the, the short story you were writing?
CHAN, JOEY, ROSS: No!
[Ross and Chandler stare angrily at Joey, who thinks he has come up with a good idea.]
ROSS: That's it? That's all you wrote? You're the worst writer in the whole world.
ROSS: No, you don't.
RACH: What is this? Ross, what is this?
ROSS: Ok, just, just remember how crazy I am about you, ok?
ROSS: Now that's a little spoiled. He was supposed to type "little", the idiot.
ROSS: No, that, that was, I mean, as opposed to uh, the uh, ok. Is this over yet Rach?
[Rachel leaves, and Ross follows her into the hall.]
ROSS: No, no, wait, ok, ok, look at the other side. Look at Julie's column.
ROSS: No, Rach, come on. Rach! Rach, no, no! She's not Rachel, she is, she is not, Ra--Rachel?
PHOE: I... I cannot believe Ross even made this list. What a dinkus.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting on the couch, eating candy. It is raining out. Ross climbs up the fire escape and is knocking on the window.]
ROSS: Rach! Whoops! Rach, hey, open up, please!
RACH: [coldly] When somebody does not buzz you in, Ross, that means go away. That doesn't mean please climb up the fire escape.
ROSS: I just wanna read something. It's your pro list.
ROSS: [reading his list] Ok, ok, number one: The way you cry at game shows. Number two: how much you love your friends. Number three: the way you play with your hair when you're nervous. Number four: how brave you are for starting your life over. Number five: how great you are with Ben.
ROSS: Number six: the way you smell.
JOEY: [opens the drapes] Hey, Ross! What are you doin'?
ROSS: Hey, Joey. You wanna open the window?
[He opens the window, Ross comes in, soaked.]
ROSS: I am, uh, I am...
[Ross runs to Rachel's bedroom, knocking on the door.]
ROSS: Rach, come on, open up. Rach, come on, come on, Rach. You got to give me another chance.
ROSS: No?
ROSS: Rach, come on, look, I know how you must feel.
RACH: [near tears] No, you don't, Ross. Imagine the worst things you think about yourself. Now, how would you feel if the one person that you trusted the most in the world not only thinks them too, but actually uses them as reasons not to be with you.
ROSS: No, but, but I wanna be with you in spite of all those things.
RACH: Oh, well, that's, that's mighty big of you, Ross. [to the others] I said don't go!
ROSS: You know what? You know what? If, things were the other way around, there's nothing you could put on a list that would ever make me not want to be with you.
[She closes the door in his face. Ross walks sullenly back to the couch and sits down. A moment of silence ensues.]
JOEY: [quietly] I never know how long you're supposed to wait in this type of a situation before you can talk again, you know? [Ross stares blankly at him] Maybe a little longer.
[Ross is at his apartment.]
ROSS: Hi.
MNCA: [to Ross] Listen, I... I don't think this is the best time.
ROSS: Look, can, can you do something for me?
RADIO: The next one's dedicated to Rachel from Ross. Rachel, he wants you to know he's deeply sorry for what he did and he hopes you can find it in your heart to forgive him. (With or Without You plays)
[Rachel seems touched. She pauses for a moment, then picks up the phone and starts to dial. Cut to Ross at his apartment.]
RADIO: Uh, we've just gotten a call from Rachel, and she told us what Ross did. It's pretty appalling, and Ross, if you're listening, I don't wanna play your song anymore. Why don't we devote our time to a couple that stands a chance? Avery, Michelle's sorry she hit you with her car and she hopes you two will work it out.
Ross: Hold on.
Joey: Ross? You okay?
Ross: If it does? Then you're an amazing friend of mine.
Ross: Well, the doctor says he's gonna be fine, he's just sleeping now.
Ross: I know I am! (Ross now starts to cry) ...And when it's summer, and it's hot, why can't you wear a tank top?
Ross: (angrily) I knew you were gonna throw that in my face!! That was three years ago! She apologized and she apologized! What more do you want?!!
Ross: I had a problem.
JOEY: [to Ross] You're getting a cat?
Ross: No-no, we talked about it. We dont want to know. All we care about is that its happy and healthy.
Ross: I wasn't- I mean, I-
Ross: You know what, he's a big boy, I'm sure he'll find us, ok?
ROSS: Yeah, I know, it's my birthday. We all should be here.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Ross, and Monica are there.]
Ross: And, I dont know, if it starts to rain
Ross: (To Rachel) So umm, where are the other guys?
Ross: of course she has. if she'd never had a serious relationship I'd go round broadcasting it like some unstoppable moron.
Joey: Hey Ross!
Girls: Yes, you're having a boy! (Monica runs over and hugs Ross)
Ross: Hey, at least you have a wife! I-I keep getting divorces and knockin people up! And Im dressed as doody.
Ross: 'Cause, I'm a stupid, stupid man.
Joey: Oh, ah, tour guide at the museum. Yeah, Ross got it for me.
Ross: (visibly nervous) Uh, that, that, that would be a judgment call.
Ross: Uh Dad, Emmas in the nursery. Ill take you now. If you want, but (To Rachel) I really want to talk to you.
Ross: (leaving) I just have to go, all right? Do I need a reason? Huh? I mean I have things to do with my life, I have a jam packed schedule, and I am late- for keeping up with it. Okay?
Ross: I'm fine! I saw a psychiatrist at work today.
Ross: Oh! You are gonna love it! (The girl is looking in the other direction as Ross is taking off his own coat, revealing the pink and white ladies shirt) and I'm so glad, we're finally doing this.
[Scene: The rugby game, Ross is getting killed.]
Ross: No! No! No!
Ross: Yeah. Theres no breaking them up, is there?
Ross: You go get em. (to Monica) What did I do to you? Did I hurt you in some way?
Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean you dont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.
Monica: God, I feel so guilty about Ross.
Ross: Its not a big deal? Oh, Im sorry I just um, I what about all the stuff you-you just said? I mean how about, I likeyou-you cant stop thinking about her. Like how you cant sleep?
(Ross enters.)
Ross: Just, y'know out.
Ross: I don't know. Soap?
Ross: It's from Ross, it's a love bug.
Ross: (entering, carrying a basket) Hi!
Rachel: Ross! Janice?!
ROSS: Hey Joey I have to cancel racketball for tonight, that was Marcel's trainer. He's gonna let me have him for a couple of hours.
Ross: I am gonna see her again.
Ross: Yeah, Im-Im sure. (Deadpan) Yeah, get out of here before I change my mind. (She exits)
Ross: (He thinks about it) Of course I am. I just have to make a call.
Ross: (entering) Hey guys!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is reading a cereal box as Ross enters wearing the red sweater.]
Ross: (to Rachel) So, were off.
Ross: All right look, I-I realize it upsets you.
Ross: This couch, is cut in half! I would like to exchange it for one that is not cut in half!
Ross: The game, Rachel, the game. You owe us money for the game.
Ross: You're nose is bleeding!
Joey: Umm, listen, Ross do you really think this moving in with Rachel is a good idea?
Ross: Still I could tell. She was into me. (Joey rolls his eyes.) Well, why dont you set us up?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Janice are sitting on the couch.]
Ross: Thanks!
Ross: Oh
Ross: Huh?
Ross: Dude, we got to talk.
Ross: OH MY GOD!!
Ross: I am now.
Ross: Okay.
Ross: All right.
Ross: Ah, somebodys at the door on the ceiling.
Ross: Ive been back and forth.
Monica: That's because as far as my parents are concerned, Ross can do no wrong. Y'see, he's the Prince. Apparently they had some big ceremony before I was born.
Ross: (walking up with Rachel and carrying coffee) Hey.
Ross: He said he liked that!! Oh youre right, youre right. Im sorry.
Ross: Sorry.
(Ross runs from the table, over the couch but slips and falls onto the floor)
Gunther: Oh, Ross? Ross! You can't put up flyers in here.
Ross: Is everything okay?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, and Ross are sitting on the couch.]
Ross: Look uh, if were gonna do this
Ross: You sang Baby Got Back didn't you?
(Ross does not approve of Chandler's daft theory.)
Ross: All right. (Takes another copy.)
Ross: No-no, one daddy, two mommies. All right, its all yours. (Ross pushes him off.)
Ross: Ehh, I dont, I dont think so. Shes already talked about yknow, dating other guys.
Ross: Coffee sounds great. (They get up) Wait, so, so you live in Montreal?
Ross: Your make-up!
Ross: (seeing the thumbs up) Ahhhh!! (Hugs Rachel tighter.)
Ross: Hey, how are you holding up?
Ross: Okay, gimme my monkey back.
Ross: Then where the hell have you been?!
Ross: Hey. (Phoebe sees his bags)
Ross: What happened?
Ross: Excuse me, do any of you know how to play?
Ross: Wh-what did he say?!
(Ross fastens his seat belt.)
Ross: So, what's going on now?
Ross: (a little embarassed by their conversation) I'm good, I have dinner plans (moves away from them).
Ross: I'm having a baby in here! Ok, everyone stand back. (Walks backwards as if he is going to break down the door, but steps in a bucket and falls) Ow.
Ross: Is that what I want?
Ross: (grabbing a notepad and sitting down) All right, we'll start off slow. The only thing you have to do tonight is come up with the name of your main character.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is watching TV, but turns it off, and Rachel is sleeping on the couch. Ross puts a blanket over her.]
Ross: Oh, we were helping Chandler write his vows, but he kicked us out because Joey kept making inappropriate suggestions.
Ross: (puts his head near the baby) Hello! (to Dr. Franzblau) Oh, sorry.
Monica: Okay its time for the toast! Umm now-now, I know that Ross usually gives the toast, but this year Im going to do it.
Ross: Thats a different issue. Uh, the point is, when the baby comes I will be there to to feed her and bathe her and change her. And more than that I want to do all those things.
Ross: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa, Joey!
(And with that everyone starts playing tonsil hockey. Chandler with Monica, Ross with Phoebe, and Joey with Rachel.)