words in movies
Monica: Six? I just had it for one night. Its three.
Clerk: Eight oclock is the cut-off and, (looks at his watch) aww, its 8:02.
Monica: (removes them) Thats because I-I was just grabbing some things out of the dryer, and its static cling. Or maybe its just that God knew Id be running into you and saw an opportunity.
Richard: Its good to see you.
Monica: Its good to see you too.
(They hug, and Richard notices a stocking stuck to Monicas back, which he removes for her.)
Monica: You see that guy? Hes in classics now, but y'know as soon as we leave hes going straight to the porn.
Richard: Hes gonna go up to the counter with Citizen Kane, Vertigo, and Clockwork Orgy. (they both laugh) This is nice.
Monica: Oh, um, I dont know if thats a good idea.
Monica: No, I just I think that its too soon.
Richard: No its not too soon, I had lunch at a eleven.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Ross. Joey, and Rachel are eating breakfast. Chandler is holding a bottle of Herseys Syrup.]
Rachel: Oh I dont know honey. Its gonna be really late.
Rachel: I will wake you up in a way thats proved very popular in the past.
Phoebe: Oh! Since tomorrow. I met this really cute guy in the park and he like y'know, jogs, and blades, and swims, and so y'know we made a deal thats hes going to teach me all sorts of jock stuff.
Phoebe: Oh, theres no such thing as an innocent burger.
Chandler: Well, she spent the last six months getting over him, and now shes celebrating that by going on a date with him.
Monica: Its not a date, okay. Im just gonna teach him how to make lasagne for some pot luck dinner he has.
Monica: Were not gonna have sex! Okay, nothings changed here. He still doesnt want children and I still do, so thats why were just gonna be friends.
Joey: Check the freezer. If theres none in there, then were probably out. Are you just getting in from work? Its late.
Rachel: But ah, youre safe from it if its in the freezer?
Rachel: Well, umm, I guess I read Little Women more than once. But I mean thats a classic, whats so great about The Shining?
Joey: The question should be Rach, what is not so great about The Shining. Okay? And the answer would be: nothing. All right? This is like the scariest book ever. I bet its way better than that classic of yours.
Phoebe: (to Robert) Youve have lipstick right here (points to her cheek). Thats okay, its mine, we just kissed.
Ross: Okay. (goes over to the counter) (to Chandler) What ah, what is the matter with you? Whats going on?
Chandler: Roberts coming out.
Chandler: No. He.....hes coming out of his shorts.
Ross: No, no, that wont be ah, that wont be necessary (leans down and looks up Roberts shorts, seeing Roberts package.)
Monica: You touch peoples eyeballs every day and this feels weird.
Richard: Yeah, well, sure I touch them, but I spent years learning not to squish them. (Monica grabs his hand in the tomatoes.) Thats my hand.
Joey: Oh yeah! Amy just burned Jos manuscript. I dont see how he could ever forgive her.
Ross: Umm, Jos a girl, its short for Josephine.
Joey: But Jos got a crush on Laurie. (Ross nods his head) Oh. You mean its like a girl-girl thing? Cause that is the one thing missing from The Shining.
Chandler: No, actually Lauries a boy.
Ross: Calm down. Theres no reason to get testy.
Monica: So, howd the lasagne go over? (listens) Really?! Good. So you owe me three pretty things. (listens) Yeah, Ive been thinking a lot about you too. (listens) I know. Its hard this whole platonic thing. (listens) Its a word!
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Monica: Yeah, I do think its better this way. (listens) Yeah, were being smart. (gets up to answer the door) (listens) Yes, Im sure.(she opens the door and its Richard)
[Scene: Monicas bedroom, shes in bed with Richard.]
Richard: Just your dad. (pause) Although thats actually racquetball. You know I-I do have a blind date with my sisters neighbour next Tuesday.
Phoebe: Yeah. And, first heres a gift.
Phoebe: Thats all right, thats well, I figured.... (they start to leave as Joey enters.)
Joey: Hey! (starts to laugh.) Hows it going?
Joey: Oooh, the next parts the best, when that dead lady in the bathtub...
Chandler: Hmmm, thats very cool.
Joey: Oh, all blank, and no blank, makes blank a blank blank. Oh no-no-no, no, the end when Jack almost kills them all with that blank, but then at last second they get away. Aww!
Rachel: All right, okay, Laurie proposes to Jo, and she says no, even though shes still in love with him, and then he ends up marring Amy.
Ross: Joeys asking if youve just ruined the first book hes ever loved that didnt star Jack Nicholson?
Phoebe: Listen, Roberts gonna be here any second so, will one of you just tell him?
Phoebe: Please, right now, no, every time I see him its like Is it on the lose? Is it watching me?
Ross: Hes right, even if its to say something complementary. (He stops and thinks about what he just said.)
[Scene: Richards bedroom, Monica has covered it in rose pedals and candles. We hear Richard come in to the apartment, and Monica frantically throws the rest of the pedals on the bed, and jumps onto the bed and puts a rose in her mouth, and bites a thorn.]
Richard: (outside the bedroom) Really?! Well, its just like everyone elses apartment. Its got rooms, walls, and ceilings.
Richards Date: Well, I just wanted to see where you lived. Now, give me the tour.
Richards Date: Impressive.
Richards Date: Oh, thats real pretty. Wait a minute, dont I get to see the bedroom?
Richard: The bedroom. Well its pretty much your typical... (opens the door as Monica hides under the covers, and quickly closes the door before his date can see the room.) bedroom.
Richards Date: Were still on this side of the door.
Richards Date: Yeah, but I didnt get to see it.
Richard: Wow. Y'know were back where we were. Honey, I would love to do all that, but nothings changed.
Monica: Thats not true, you dont have a moustache.
Richard: Okay, okay, one things changed. But we still want different things and we know how this is gonna end.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering, and hes very dejected.]
Joey: Jos there, but I dont think theres anything she could do.
Ross: No, Monicas restaurant got a horrible review in the Post. (They all gasp.) I didnt want her to see it, so I ran around the neighborhood and bought all the copies I could find. (He hands the paper to Phoebe and they all read it.)
Rachel: You guys, theres a little girl in Soho looking for this cat. I mean, you know what that means?!
Monica: (to Joey) Whats so funny?
Joey: What-whats so funny?
Chandler: (to Rachel, whos entering) Hey! Howd the interview go?
Rachel: (to Ross) Whats your problem?
Joey: Well. I guess you think youre pretty special huh? Sittin up here in your fancy small hall building. Makin stars jump through hoops for ya, huh? Well yknow what? (Throws the script away) This is one star whos hoop This is a star that the hoopthis hoopI was Dr. Drake Remoray!
Phoebe: Ugh, its so exhausting waiting for death. Ohh, by the way, do you think you could(Groans, hacks, and then freezes with her eyes open and her tongue hanging out.)
Frank: Yeah, so we just thought wed stop by and let you know theres still no pressure.
[Scene: Outside Chandlers Office, Chandler is just about to go into his office when Bob calls for him from behind.]
Phoebe: What, hes 18.
Monica: It was okay. Shes still kind of depressed because she broke up with her boyfriend.
Chandler: Okay, thats like the least fun game ever.
Monica: Youre right, Im sorry. Its not like youre yknow, going out with an ex-girlfriend.
Joey: No, not really. They give you all the information, its uh, its like memorizing a script. (Making like a tour guide) "And on your left, you have Tyrannosaurus Rex, a carnivore from the Jurassic period.
Ross: Yeah, thats the one. Listen, I dont want to hurt her.
Chandler: Its the semi-finals of her botchy ball tournament.
Rachel: This bench, its hollow! I cant believe I never knew that! (She pushes all the pillows off it and opens it up) Oh, the presents!!!
Phoebe: Thankfully you dont need me at all (gets up and to leave) so Okay Super aunt see you later! Rachel lets give it six to eight months (she leaves).
Monica: Hows the big anniversary dinner?
Ross: No the mans right, thats what I had with Rachel.
[Scene: Chandlers bedroom, Chandler is listening to the hypnosis tape.]
Wayne: It can do this. (He moves C.H.E.E.S.E.s arm close to Joeys special area and he jumps back.)
Chloe: Hey, come dance. What? Are you married? Cause thats okay.
Chandler: Its horrible.
Joey: Hey-hey, whos your friend? (Erin turns around to face Joey, startling him) Hey!!
Monica: Oh, thats sounds great.
Pete: Thats about 60 cents.
Rachel: Ross, she still has not noticed that the baby�s sock is on the ground.
Ross: Cause Carols a lesbian. (Phoebe is shocked) And, and Im not one. And apparently its not a mix and match situation.
Kathy: Umm, (moves her hands down to his butt) I love this touchy. Can I take it to work with me?
Monica: Heres your key. All right, you have to christen it! Now, go out and come back in!
Monica: All right, yknow what? We really are late! Lets go! Lets go! Lets go!!
The Director: Joe. Hows it going?
Monica: Its gonna be so great.
[Scene: Rosss Classroom, he is writing on the board and Alan is coming in to see him.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is showing Monica where Sergeis country is.]
Ross: Well Im sorry but, that-thats really not my problem.
Rachel: Oh please, theyve been going out a week. They havent even slept together yet, I mean, thats not serious.
Ross: My son? Pretty serious. (Theres a knock on the door and Ross answers it.) Oh hey Katie! (The cashier from before) What uh, what are you doing here?
Ross: Its still a gift! I got it from the gift shop!
Monica: Noo! Ill stay. Hes my brother.
Joey: Oh yes I do. Otherwise whats next? Today Im just a guy who cant finish a turkey, but tomorrow Im the guy who eats half a Powerbar, wraps up the rest, and puts in the fridge? No! No, I just I justI gotta change my pants. (Gets up and heads for the door.) Jeans have no give. (Exits.)
Phoebe: (thinking to herself) Okay, baseball. Rick, playing baseball. Okay, slides into second, maybe even his pants come down a little Oh nowait no, no! No! Okay, all right, sandwiches, sandwiches. Umm, okay, on a plate, maybe Ricks pants come down a little. No! No! Okay, Chandler! Okay Chandler, ooh, thats working.
Phoebe: Okay. But the question is whos gonna go first. Cause whoever goes second is the bitch.
Monica: (hearing that) Thats it big girl! (Hits Janine in the butt with the garbage bag) Come on!
Ross: Hey, its been like three weeks!
Chandler: Its incredible, I mean one minute shes inside you and then 47 hours later here she is.
Mark: Thats okay.
Monica: Its not?
[Scene: Joshuas parents apartment, Rachel and Joshua are entering.]
Joey: (holding an empty tissue box) Wheres all the tissues?! (Throws the box down in disgust.)
[Scene: Central Perk, the gangs all there discussing the incident.]
Monica: So, Chandler, whos on your list?
Monica: And what if I was still fat? (To Chandler) Well, you wouldnt be dating me, thats for sure.
[Rachels boss, Joanna, enters]
Chandler: Thats the stuff! (quickly grabs it)
Joanna: (to Rachel) So ah, whats wrong with him?
Monica: Whats this?
Ross: Sure, whats up?
Phoebe: Umm, Im sorry. Wont-wont Jacks father be joining us?
Ross: Hey, whats this?!
Rachel: Whats this?
Chandler: (entering) Hey, my Fathers house does that!
[Scene: Rachels office, Joannas telling Rachel, her side of the story.]
Rachel: Youre right. Youre right. I mean Im about to have a baby, I can tell my mother that I dont want her to just be sleeping on my couch! Oh my God! Shes gonna want to sleep in my bed with me. This cannot happen!
Chandler: So um, Mary-Angela, whats your second favorite?
Phoebe: Yeah. (Looks.) Oh, thats gone too. This is Monicas bathroom right?!
Joey: And a 50. (The salesman stops suddenly) Huh, these must be Chandlers pants.
Monica: Youre kidding?! Thats great!
Chandler: Thats what you say at the end of a date.
[Scene: Rachels office.]
Phoebe: Oh, the Angelica!! Go! Go! (She bangs on the cabs roof and it pulls away.) (To Ross) You didnt get the annulment?!!
Joey: Aww, man. Thats the girl I was hiding from. When she finds out hes my roommate, shes gonna tell him what I did.
Rachel: Thats fine!
Ross: Oh, fire! There, theres a fire! Fire!!
Joey: Oh yeah, and shes really nice too! She taught me about yknow, how to work with the cameras and smell-the-fart acting.
(They move on the couch and start kissing again. Joey does his grazing on Rachel’s thigh and she slaps his hand)
Ross and Chandler: Its my joke.
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is waiting for Tim who enters.]
Chandler: Oh my God! Whos gonna watch that?!
Jennifer: Lisas laugh though TheresIts so infectious. Its one of those things just forget about it. Once it starts, its all gone.
(She slaps Rachels side and Rachel screams in pain.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachels, Monica has finally given up on her search to find what the light switch does and is now flicking it on and off aimlessly.]
Monica: Thats Bill Clinton.
Monica: Okay. Heres the thing.
Joey: Maybe, my rulers wrong.
Pete: Wait, wait, wait, wait, thats-thats what youre worried about? If thats the problem, weve got no problem.
Joey: Whats not to like? Custard? Good. Jam? Good. Meat? Goooooood.
Joey: Hows she doing?
Joey: Well yeah, dont-dont you think its a she?
Joey: Thats not a bad idea. Yeah. Okay, but if I got to turn on the charm tomorrow Im not wasting anymore of it over here with you guys. (Starts to leave, but stops and turns to Phoebe.) Well, actually I got a little bit saved for you Pheebs. (Exits.)
Phoebe: Oh, hi, Mrs. Waltham. I need to speak with ether one of the best men, or Rosss sister Monica.
Joey: Thats not what I said. Okay, I just meant...
Rachel: Chandler, thats not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And youve just gotten her one great present? I mean thats just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
Joanna: Just a little gag gift somebody gave me. (Shes holding a pair of handcuffs) Put your hands together.
Joey: Correct! Theres a possible backwards bonus!
Parker: Dahaaa! (Punches Chandler in the arm and he makes a face of pain.) Im going to find the mens room, be right back.
Joey: Its the chick! Shes going through some changes.
Monica: Hes not boring! Hes just-hes just low key.