words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler walks in and starts raiding the fridge. Then Rachel comes out of the shower with a towel wrapped round her waist, drying herself with another towel. Chandler and Rachel startle each other and she drops the towel for a second and snatches the rug off the couch.]
(She storms off)
Phoebe: Oh, honey, honey, tell them the story about your patient who thinks things are, like, other things. Y'know? Like, the phone rings and she takes a shower.
Rachel: I know, I mean, why can't parents just stay parents? (She walks over near Chandler and his gaze stays very obviously on her chest) Why do they have to become people? Why do they have... (Notices Chandler) Why can't you stop staring at my breasts?
Ross: Y'see, that's where you're wrong. Why would I marry her if I thought on any level thatthat she was a lesbian?
Rachel: Perfect. Fasten your seatbelts, it's peepee time. (She goes into Joey and Chandler's apartment, where Mr. Tribbiani is reading the paper) Hey, Mr. Trib.
(She opens the door and whips back the curtain. It's Joey. They both scream)
Mrs. Tribbiani: Why did you have to fill your father's head with all that garbage about making things right? Things were fine the way they were! There's chicken in there, put it away. For God's sake, Joey, really. (She gives the sofabed a tiny push and it folds away)
Joey: Yeah. You're ten times prettier than she is.
Roger: Aaaah, what's wrong, c'mon. (Pats his leg. She lies down and rests her head in his lap)
Joey: Yeah. He's gonna keep cheating on my ma like she wanted, she's gonna keep pretending she doesn't know even though she does, and my little sister Tina can't see her husband any more because he got a restraining order...which has nothing to do with anything except that I found out today.
(He leaves. Cut to Monica entering Chandler and Joey's apartment. She sneaks up to the shower door)
(She whips back the curtain to reveal Joey's dad)
Mr. Tribbiani: Oh! ...Hello, dear. (She whips the curtain shut in horror)
Chandler: She doesnt know. Says she loves us both. Y'know I woke up this morning and I was in love, well I was happy. Y'know it serves me right for buying that twelve pack of condoms. And now I cant even return them, because she choked on the reciept!
Joey: I hate this woman!! I hate her! She told everyone in the company about that info-mercial, and now they all keep asking me to open their drinks. Okay, and whenever I cant do it, theyre all like-like laughing at me.
Aunt Lillian: You know, whatever we pick, she would've told us it's the wrong one.
Monica: In. (She joins in the dancing. She still flounders)
Joey: Oh Rachel look, don't say that, I think you just need a hug from Joey. Come on. Come on. (She hugs him and Joey looks out the window.) She's back! Hot girl's back!
Frank: Well, when I tell my friends about her she will be.
MONICA: I've not seen her since high school graduation. Oh my God, that night she got so dru. . . motional.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebes baby shower, she is holding those leather pants, and isnt happy about it.]
Phoebe: Hell yeah! Ill marry you! (She grabs the ring and puts it on.)
Ross: Oh! ...Yeah, they were gross. Oh, you know what I loved? Her Sweet 'n' Los. How she was always stealing them from- from restaurants.
Rachel: Oh. (She tries to walk away from Josh, by he keeps holding her) Stop it!
Phoebe: Y'know, if you want, you can call her machine, and if she has a lot of beeps, that means she probably didn't get her messages yet.
Monica: I can't believe they called, and we're actually getting a baby. (she kisses Chandler)
Phoebe: Really? So she said, she didnt wanna live with me anymore?
(She leaves)
(She walks down the hall)
Aunt Lillian: She may have died?
(They quickly take their places and Here Comes the Bride Begins to play. Everyone seated looks back. Emily is being escorted up the aisle by her father. She kisses him on the cheek and takes her place by Rosss side.)
Chandler: Shes just doing her job!
Katie: No, you make them funny. You're the funny one! (She punches him again and he retreats to the arm of the couch.)
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. You looked at her. You never look. You just answer, it's just a reflex. Do I look fat? Nooo! Is she prettier than I am? Noo! Does size matter?
Ross: Well, okay, what-what did she say?
Rachel: All right, okay, Laurie proposes to Jo, and she says no, even though shes still in love with him, and then he ends up marring Amy.
Rachel: Yeah, you know, was I looking forward to going to Paris? Sure. You know, was I excited about working in the fashion capital of the world? Ooh, absolutely... Oh...! Yeah, but you know, this is... it's fine. I'm fine going back to a job where I've pretty much gotten everything out of that I possibly can... (she sits down, and Ross who is stunned to hear all this follows her example)
Joey: Oh, hey. Come on man, don't look at me like that, she used to drive you nuts before too, remember?
Mrs. Green: Now dont worry! Everythings gonna be okay. (Hugs Rachel while she is standing and Rachel is sitting, seeing this Monica decides to join in on the hugging by hugging Mrs. Green from behind her back.)
Monica: People! People say it! Come here! (She grabs him and kisses him.)
Phoebe: Yeah! Sure! Ooh, I left my purse up at Monicas. Ill be right back. (She goes to get it.)
Rachel: Oh thank you! (Wiping her nose.) Oh God! (She throws it out.) Can I have another one?
Monica: Oh my God! Oh, this is incredible! Ohh! (she rolls over and kisses him on the cheek) All right, y'know what? Im just gonna roll right into that office and-and quit!
Monica: Ooh... she backed out.
Phoebe: Shes made it pretty clear, it is not going to happen.
Ross: Yeah, and she still wants to go! It's pretty clear where she is.
Joey: Wait! Wait! Maybe shes a hooker and a stripper, but she got confused about what shes supposed to do.
Phoebe: Well, I think you're gonna appreciate it the crap out of this one (she gives him a check)
Phoebe: Well, 'cause then they'd be like my mom used to make them, you know, before she died.
Amy: No, she was this really dorky girl in high school that used to follow Rachel around like a puppy dog.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, oh, she went to the salon alright...
Rachel: Shell be out in a second. So, Chip, hows umm, Amy Welch?
Ross: Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I had no idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological age difference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, it doesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one dating Elizabeth, not you!
Ross: Come here (Removes Emma's hat) Oh! There she is! Hi!
Rachel: I wanna sleep, I wanna eat, I wanna take a shower, I mean before she wakes up and we gotta do this all over again.
Joey: And you never knew she was a lesbian...
Rachel: What?! Wait a minute! No wait a minute! (She does so.) Okay? Look, that night was the one wild thing I have ever done in my entire life, and Im not gonna let you take that away from me! Okay, so if you dont remember that, maybe you will remember this! (She grabs Melissa and kisses her on the lips.)
[Scene: Elizabeths apartment, she is packing for her trip as Ross watches.]
Phoebe: well there is no Vicrum, Ross made him up because I never really have been in a long-term relationship, I've never lived with a guy, and I've never even celebrated an anniversary so. (Pause) if that's too weird for you and you wanna leave I totally understand. In fact I'll close my eye's make it less awkward (She sits with her eyes closed and Mike kisses her, Phoebe opens her eyes and like a little child says.) You kissed me.
Phoebe: Because you'll date her once, sleep with her and then forget she exists!
Ross: Hi. She said yes.
Phoebe: Right. (She turns and opens her eyes in shock.)
Joey: How's that different? (She looks at him until he gets it.) Oh! Yeah!
(Monica goes to the door.� Chandler slides behind it as she opens it slightly.)
Phoebe: (running up) Okay. Okay, heres what were gonna do. Okay, Im gonna break into this mini-van and put it in neutral. You guys push it forward so Ross can drive out of his spot. Okay? All right, here we go. (She opens her coat and reveals that thing car thieves use to break into cars as Ross jumps in behind the wheel. She inserts the device, unlocks the door, opens it, and the alarm goes off.) Haul ass!!!! (Runs off.)
(They look at each other. We switch back to Monica. Chandler opens the door and she turns to look at him.)
Ross: Yeah. Shes putting her down now, thats her. (Points to the nurse putting Emma now.)
(She goes into her apartment and sees Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross sitting there.)
Phoebe: Okay. (Starts to spin) Ooh, y'know we could just do this. (She stops at Chandler)
(She kisses him passionately,then leaves.)
Joey: Well, not so good. She definitely thinks tonight is the night we're gonna... complete the transaction, if you know what I...
Rachel: Oh..Go..Oh..and I told my boss that someone made out with Ralph Lauren. If she finds out that I lied to her, she is going to hate me even more. Phoebe!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is holding a book as she, Rachel, and Monica drink some tea as Chandler looks on.]
Ross: You had a rough day, huh.. c'mere. (She sits down and Ross strokes her forehead.)
Joey: Hey, hey, Chan. She could work for you.
Ross: She was blonde? (he looks surprised for a while, but then gets a "gotcha" expression on his face... There's knocking at the door.) Just a sec.! Okay, okay. This one's name is Sandy. She's got a degree in early childhood education, uhm... she worked for her last family for three years.
Mr. Geller: Well, shell understand right? Its not like I did it on purpose.
Ross: Oh! Oh! Shes upside down but shes coming! Shes coming!
Monica: Im fine. (She goes into one of those half sneezing, half-coughing fits that you get with a bad cold or flu.)
Chandler: (to Joey) I wasnt doing anything. (Joey starts angrily throwing his stuff down.) Uh-oh, what did she do now?
DR. BURKE: Ah, that's OK, come on in. Um, I'm sorry, is Monica Geller coming? I was told she was.
Phoebe: Oh! Oh, I can't believe it! I mean I think it's great! For him. She might be able to do better.
Ross: Now, hold on! Hold on! (Stops him) Look, look, your daughter and I are supposed to leave tonight for our honeymoon, now-now you-you tell her that Im gonna be at that airport and I hope that shell be there too! Oh yeah, I said Rachels name, but it didnt mean anything, Okay? Shes-shes just a friend and thats all! (Rachel sits down, depressed.) Thats all! Now just tell Emily that I love her and that I cant imagine spending my life with anyone else. Please, promise me that youll tell her that.
(She kisses him, he holds her, and kisses her passionately.)
Chandler: Yeah, yeah, she works over at that place, uh...
Rachel: Jill, honey, I think this is the best thing that couldve ever happened to you. I mean you needed to get out on your own anyway! And you know when I did it, I-I-I at first I was scared, and look at me now! Im the only daughter dad is proud of! Okay, well this is, this is what youre gonna do. Youre gonna get a job, youre gonna get an apartment, and then Ill help you and you can stay with us. Right Pheebs, she can stay with us?
Monica: Ohhh, oh my God! Oh my God! She knows about us!
Ross: (she lets him in) Okay! (to her son) Hey Tommy.
Phoebe: Oh thats good, I guess shell have a choice between my guy and your weirdo.
Monica: This baby has got everything. Take yknow, locations for instance. (She opens up the binder to the locations chapter.) First, organized alphabetically, then geographically, then by square footage.
Ross: Some would say shes attractive, yes.
Rachel: Joey? Could you get that? (There is no answer and she goes and opens the door to Joey.) What are you doing here? I thought you were in your room?
[Scene: Rachels bedroom, shes in her closet bringing down her pair of roller blades from a top shelf.]
Rachel: Chandler! Chandler, please, I have to get you locked up back the way you were, I am sooo gonna lose my job, shes very private about her office. Now I know why.
Chandler: Why dont you use ours across the hall, cause she has problems.
Joey: She is so hot!
Joey: I know, but I dont think thats what she wants.
Phoebe: Rachel Green? (angrily) Son of a bitch, she came back?
Phoebe: Oh well, what do you know, there goes my identical twin sister. Just walkin' along looking like me. What, is this just like a freakish coincidence, or did you know she takes this train?
[Scene: Monica's restaurant, she is getting inspected by the health department, Phoebe is watching.]
Monica: (She gives Joey a you-are-so-stupid-look) Ok, ten.
Joey: I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
Rachel: Whoa! (Laughs) Y'know what Katie? I gotta tell ya I-I-I-I think you are the one who is too much. (She punches Katie back.)
Joey: She was nothing compared to you.
Rachel: Oh, howd she take it?
[Scene: Ursula's apartment, Phoebe is about to break the bad news to her sister. She knocks on the door.]
Rachel: Oh. Thats so Monica can keep track. That way if one on them is missing, she can be like, Wheres number 27?!
Ross: All right, look, look, youve got to do this yourself, okay in person. At least you know her name. You just go to the house and you ask for Mary-Angela, okay, when which ever one she is comes to the door, you take her for a walk, you let her down easy.
Ross: I have been down in your store for twenty minutes trying to get a tie! What do I have to do to get some service?! (turns to Rachel) Hi Rach. (He's puts his hand on her shoulder and she knocks it away.)
Ross: Uh, yeah! I still cant believe she hates Pottery Barn!
Joey: Yeah, but, hey look, dont go through her stuff. She gets really mad.(Chandler gives him a look and walks to the door of his old room.)
Tag: Yeah, so she went back to Ohio.
Monica: You do know that was me who just said that right? (He doesnt respond and she turns on the light, waking him.) Hey. As long as were both up