words in movies
Rachel: Well obviously I wont be able to come, for those of you who havent checked their calendars today is my due date. Well yknow, I just want to take a moment and thank you guys for how great youve been during this time. I really couldnt have done it without you. And I have loved these last nine months! And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna miss being pregnant.
Rachel: You. Like you havent done enough.
Rachel: They sent me home from work. They were like, "Start your maternity leave now! Just rest, get ready for the baby." Well yknow what? Screw em! If they dont want me there, Ill just hang out with you guys.
Joey: You said you didnt want to go.
Rachel: I dont. But I would still like to be acknowledged. What? Just because Im pregnant you think Im invisible.
Monica: Well, well Ross didnt care enough to be here, so I think hes out. You snooze you lose.
Chandler: I havent seen this dress.
Monica: Wait a minute, just because he paid for your head shots youre gonna take him? Joey, I dont think youre comprehending just how slutty this dress is!
Joey: Its not just the stuff he paid for, I mean its-its everything. Yknow? He read lines with me. He-he went with me on auditions when I was really nervous, and then he consoled me after I didnt get parts that I really wanted. You always believed in me man. Even, even when I didnt believe in myself.
Rachel: Oh, I have to pee. If I dont come out in five minutes its because Ive choked to death on the potpourri stink. (Goes into the bathroom.)
Phoebe: I dont know. I-I think its still gonna be a while.
Phoebe: Until then, General Grant, why dont you set up camp (She puts the bill in her bra) right there.
Ross: People ask me why were not together, I just dont know what to tell them.
Ross: Really? You dont think thats a little inappropriate. (Shes wearing a tank top and has her belly sticking out.)
Phoebe: Good God man dont anger it.
Rachel: Oh uh-uh pal! Dont call me mommy! Its bad enough you call your own mother that. (He looks at Monica.)
Ross: Yknow what? The doctor will be in soon, why dont we not speak until then.
Joey: You fell asleep!! There was no kangaroo! They didnt take any of my suggestions! Thats for coming buddy. Ill see you later. (Starts to walk out.)
Chandler: Dont go! Im sorry. Im so sorry! (Sees another guy who is still asleep.) Look! This guy fell asleep! He fell asleep too! Be mad at him! (Looks at him more closely.) Or, call an ambulance.
Rachel: Well, there is one thing that we havent tried, but someone thinks that, (mimicking Ross) "That will open up a can of worms."
Phoebe: Oh I-I dont know about that. No, I think that if the two of you had sex the-the-the repercussions would be catastrophic.
Monica: All right, lets be practical, if Ross isnt willing to do it, hes not the only guy in the world you can have sex with. You can borrow ChandlerChandler is good!
Monica: Okay fine! I keep betting Phoebe that youre gonna have the baby and I dont want to lose again!
Rachel: Oh honey, dont worry. I really do feel like tomorrows the day.
Joey: Give me a number, I dont want to owe you anything!
Chandler: You dont owe me anything, I dont want you money
Chandler: I dont know, five hundred dollars?
Ross: Okay here, have one of these peppers. Oh ha Oh God! So so hot! (Rubs his eyes.) Oh my(Laughs.) By the way, you dont want to touch the pepper and then touch your eye.
Rachel: Oh, I know it. Youre right. Thats not sexy. Oh Oh! (Drops a fork on the floor.) Whoops! Oh, I seem to have dropped my fork. Let me just bed over and get it. (Tries too, but cant quite seem to make it.) Oh God!
Rachel: I didnt uh, really have time to read this part of the books, but do you think we have time to
Monica: Thats it. Im done. I dont care when the baby comes, no more betting.
Monica: You know everything!! Oh wait, double or nothing. I bet you the baby is over seven pounds. (Phoebe isnt interested.) I bet you it has hair. (Shes still not interested.) I bet you its a girl.
Chandler: No, I ah, I didnt do them.
Rachel: Ross, it just wouldnt have been feasible.
Joey: Oh, hey, dont forget your shirt.
Guy: I hope you dont think Im crazy but I feel like I was meant to pick this up, do you believe in that kind of thing?
Phoebe: Yeah, and yknow what? I dont give a tiny rats ass.
Monica: Hey, dont mix those up, you could really ruin that lollipop.
Rachel: I dont know!
Monica: What, he doesnt like Josh?
Rachel: Joey, just because theyre not getting married doesnt mean this is going to be a disaster. Maybe they have a plan!
Rachel: (not sure of what to do) Yknow what? I dont, I dont think Phoebe really wants to come.
Joey: Yeah, I (Shuts off the TV.) I dont want Stevie to see her like this.
Ross: You dont want to believe me, Im Mr. Funny to you. Mr. Funny (turns around and almost spills his coffee on Tommy)
C.H.E.E.S.E: Oh yeah? Well then how come I cant get my VCR to stop blinking 12:00?
Joey: Now, dont argue with me
Chandler: Oh no-no-no, no more offers. You cant offer anything to us!
Rachel: No I know, because to be a grandmother you have to be married and have children and I dont have any of those things. Thats why its so funny. (Runs into her room crying.)
Rachel: Oh, I can not believe you didnt tell me!
Mac: Well, I couldnt have done it without you buddy. Youre a genius.
Emily: We dont have to.
Ross: I cant ask people to do that? Would you ask people to do that? (Holds out his pants)
Monica: No that was Jarred! Wow! I havent thought about him in a long time (Stares off into the distance lost in thought.) (Pause) Anyway, umm Wills, Wills here on business and he didnt have a place to go so I invited him here.
Rachel: Yeah, I cant live with Joey once the baby comes. I dont want my childs first words to be, (in a babys voice) "How you doin?"
Frank: Oh, well y'know, I wouldve called but I lost your phone number and then ah, my Mom locked me out of the house so I couldnt find it. And then, I tried to find a pay phone, and ah, the receiver was cut off. So...
Phoebe: God. Do think it really doesnt hurt? Cause how can they do that?
Joey: You bet I do! I just ah, wasnt listening then, thats all.
Joey: Yeah, not it here it isnt.
Joey: No, I dont think so.
Monica: Oh, stop beating yourself up! People make mistakes! These things happen! There arent any message youve forgotten to give me are there? (Chandler has a disgusted look on his face.) Apparently youre not very good at it! I
Ross: Yeah, yeah. (opens the door) It wasnt every morning.
Monica: I dont understand, I mean am I so hard to live, is this why I dont have a boyfriend?
Chandler: I dont know. Should we try it?
Phoebe: No, actually I dont eat
Mrs. Potter: Phoebe, we have rules here, this isnt that kind of place.
Emily: I left a bra drying on the shower rod, you dont think your son will think its yours and be horribly traumatised?
Ross: What, that wasnt the great news?
Joey: Dont you think I asked him that before he got in?!
Rachel: Phoebe, we cant, we just cant just let it happen! Okay, we have to do something! We have to break them up! Okay? Just go in there and like, shave her head! You owe me one bald girl!!
Chandler: I dont want to look.
Monica: Aw, Im sorry sweetie that she doesnt feel the same way.
Phoebe: Hey Ross! Doesnt Ben go to the Smithfield Day School?
Joey: Yeah! Well, I think well see if they actually let you play. Huh? I mean they tell you anything you want to hear like-like, "You look 19," and then they just take it away like-like, "No you dont."
Rachel: (to the cowgirl) And you are so in style right now. Yknow, I work at Ralph Lauren and the whole fall line has got this like equestrian theme going on. I dont suppose you saw the cover of British Vogue, but
Ross: Okay, you dont have to stop, Im invisible, Im not here. (lights a candle)
Ross: (crying) Yeah, but this cant be it, I mean.
Ross: Okay, fine, fine. You dont want to believe me? No, thats fine. (starts to leave)
Ross: Why-why cant you take a couple of days off?
Monica: We havent eaten yet!
Ross: (laughs) That uh, that was pretty funny. Wasnt it?
Monica: Oh, I-I dont know.
Joey: Well, why dont you tell me what youre supposed to be! Huh? Because I sure as hell cant figure it out! I talk to you and its nothin. You look at me, and nothin. (He kisses her, more passionately this time) Nothing.
Rachel: Cant I just look at the handles on them?
Monica: Y'know what, dont tell us. Well just wait until Chandler gets home, (to Phoebe) because itll be more fun that way.
Chandler: To her face? Look its the end of the date, Im standing there, I know all shes waiting for is for me to say Ill call her and its just y'know, comes out. I cant help it, its a compulsion.
Chandler: Luckily, the guy she settled for cant hear what youre talking about.
Mrs. Green: Oh no-no-no-no sweetheart, you stay put. Ill let myself out. Its like Im not here, which I almost wasnt.
Rachel: Oh, come on Joey! You will totally keep it in check this time, and plus yknow the publicity would be really good for your career! And you deserve that! And if you do the interview you can mention, oh I dont know, gal pal Rachel Green?
Chandler: No we didnt!
Phoebe: I cant follow Ross! Itd be like those bicycle ridding chimps that followed The Beetles. No.
Chandler: Look, forget it. We tried, but Phase Three is a lost cause, Okay? Those strippers were insanely hot, and I couldnt picture myself with any of them. (Sits back in disgust.)
Phoebe: I havent really had any yet.
Chandler: Is this why they dont like me or why you dont like me?
Ross: Oh, I dont, I dont, I dont know
Rachel: But, Pheebs, you can still use the copy machine where I actually work. But, just come by at lunch so my boss doesnt see you. Cause Kim will just freak out and she already doesnt like me very much.
Rachel: Dont worry, were just gonna search here for an hour, them were gonna go over to Joeys and search, OK?
Ross: Thanks guys! (They both sit down on either side of him.) I really appreciate this, yknow, but you dont have to rub my butt.
Rachel: Okay, well cant you just try it one more time Ross? For me? For me?
Chandler: But only because I was up all night worried about this meeting, aint that funny? Irony? Not a fan, alright (he sits down). See, heres the thing. I went home and told my wife about Tulsa and she wont go. See, me, I love Tulsa! Tulsa is heaven! Tulsa is ItalyPlease dont make me go there!
Joey: (asleep) So why dont you give me your number?
Chandler: Yeah, well, I dont dance at weddings.
Mac: (on TV) Well, if we learned one thing today C.H.E.E.S.E. is that cheerleaders and high explosives dont mix. (Cut to Joey laughing while Rachel, Chandler, and Monica arent amused.)
Mr. Geller: My joke wasnt funny.
Mrs. Waltham: I know, its horrible isnt it?
Joey: I saw this movie once where there was a door and no one knew what was behind it, and when they finally got it open millions and millions and millions of bugs came pouring out and they feasted on human flesh. Yknow it wouldnt kill ya to respect your wifes privacy! (He walks away and into his apartment and looks the door.) Stupid closet full of bugs!
Gym Employee: You do realize that you wont have access to our new full service Swedish spa.
Ross: I was hugging her as a friend. Its not my fault her-her hair got in my face, shes got a lot of it and it smells all-all uh coconutty. (Phoebe raises her eyebrows.) What?! Oh, that doesnt mean I have feelings for Rachel! Maybe it means I have feelings for coconuts!
Joey: Why dont you tell me something I dont know! (He storms out, and once Treeger closes the door behind him, Joey makes an Oops! have.)
Mr. Waltham: Dont take that tone with me. (She looks evilly at him.) All-all right you can. (He looks over at Ross and Shrugs.)
Monica: Oh my God, you cant even see where the Titanic hit it.
Tag: No. We had a really good talk. I dont think Im gonna do that bar scene anymore.
Rachel: (yelling from the living room) Oh wait-wait-wait!! No! Dont go in there! Dont go in there! I need another soda!
Joey: (getting out) Awww, man! He promised he wouldnt take the chairs!!
Chandler: An invitation for the At First Sight premiere? Oh my God! Val Kilmer didnt wear this in Batman! He wore it to the premiere of some tooty-fruity love story where he played a blind guy!
Monica: I dont believe you spent my wedding fund on the beach house!
Hillary: Ive probably been talking too much. Why dont we talk about you a little bit?
Chandler: So apparently we just dont pay for food anymore. (Rachel laughs then Chandler notices something.) Do you see what I see?
Joshua: You really dont seem like you do. Thats
Ross: ....right? Right? I mean its pretty unbelievable y'know, I mean they just took off, took off without even looking back. Y'know I dont, I dont need them, huh, Ive got you guys now as friends, you and Susan.
Emily: And that big bloke with the beard, he has got a trick hip. Yeah. And uh, and David over there, I heard he doesnt wear a cup.
Phoebe: Theres sooo much you dont know.
Earl: (To All) Did you hear that?! I dont need you guys to care about me! Because the universe cares! The whole universe! (Laughs as everyone ignores him.) (To Phoebe) I really wished theyd care just a little bit though.
The Producer: Im sorry, why dont we do that right now? Hes right here. (Points to a guy.)
Ross: Emma left her stuffed t-rex at my house. You know she can’t sleep without it.
Rachel: Thats not her name! Im sorry, she just doesnt feel like an Isabella.
Joey: Why dont you like PBS, Pheebs?
Kitchen Worker: Well, I dont know what to tell ya!
Joey: Come on Ross! Look, I-I dont have any brothers; Ill never get to be a best man!
Joey: No, no, I didnt mean you. But, you believed me, huh?
Ross: Hate him? I No, I dont hate him. (Pause) Its just its Rachel, yknow?
Rachel: (crying) No. I cant, youre a totally different person to me now. I used to think of you as somebody that would never, ever hurt me, ever. God, and now I just cant stop picturing with her, I cant, (Ross stands up and backs away) it doesnt matter what you say, or what you do, Ross. Its just changed, everything. Forever.
Monica: They really were pretty, werent they? (Rachel and Phoebe both agree)