words in movies
Monica: Oh, the way you crushed Mike at ping pong was such a turn-on.You wanna...? (plays with her finger on Chandlers chest)
(they start to get ready, but then Phoebe enters through the door from Ross's room)
Phoebe: Well, okay, Mike's taking a shower, which by the way there's no law against. And then we're gonna grab some food, so if you want...
(they all put their ear against the wall to be able to hear what's being said. We move to Ross's room where he and Charlie are kissing.)
Monica: No I'm not sure that it's the best way to hear everything. Someone get me a glass!
(Phoebe starts to listen at the other wall, where Rachel's room is. There, Joey and Rachel are kissing.)
(Chandler and Monica take a sprint to the other wall)
(In the rooms next door, Joey, Rachel, Ross and Charlie stop kissing and try to understand what the yelling was about. After a while they continue kissing. We're back in Chandler and Monica's room. Monica has some of her own hair stuffed in her mouth by Chandler.)
Rachel: What? Ross and Charlie? (Joey nods) Wow! She's really making her way through the group, huh? Ah, who am I to talk?
Chandler: How about the dinosaur twins in the other room? No-one is manning that wall!
Monica: Not until you said it. Somebody switch! (Chandler makes a clicking sound with his fingers and Phoebe runs to the other wall. Monica returns to Chandlers wall.) Wait a minute... Ross and Charlie, Joey and Rachel, Phoebe and Mike! We're the only people leaving with the same person we came with.
Monica: Okay, I've had it with the hair jokes. Tomorrow morning, before we leave, I'm going to the salon.
Charlie: Ooh... Is it because of what might be on the bedspread, because I saw that news report too, with the infra red and the ... I could just...
Ross: No, NO! (they're moving to the side of the bed, where they sit down) Look, I need to talk to Joey. I mean, you guys just broke up. Before anything more happens between us, I need to know he's okay with it.
(Chandler and Monica's, all three of them are listening at the wall to Ross and Charlie's)
Phoebe: That's the door. He's gone...
Chandler: And she's... turning on the TV... and watching... Miss Congeniality!
(They are still listening at the wall, when Ross enters their room)
Phoebe: Oh, we're just... we're sad to go so we're just saying goodbye to the hotel. (hugs the wall) I love you... Paradise Hotel, Golf resort and Spa... (she walks away from the wall)
Monica: (also hugs the wall) Yeah, we had a great time, thank you! (walks to Phoebe)
Chandler: (caresses the wall with his finger) Bye!
Chandler: He's probably in his room with his current girlfriend Charlie. That's the situation as we know it... (walks to Phoebe and Monica)
Ross: Thanks! (walks out of the room and starts hugging the wall) Thank you! (closes the door)
(they rush to the wall to Rachel and Joey's, and we move to that room)
Ross: (knocks on door) Rach, you there? (Joey and Rachel both get up from the bed)
Rachel: Oh, ju-ju-just stay calm. Just be calm. For all he knows we're just hanging out together. Right? Just be nonchalant. (Joey like stands at attention with his chest forward and his hands on his sides, looking up at the ceiling with his lips pouted.) That's not nonchalant!
Rachel: Coming! Try under the bed, try under the bed!
(When Rachel starts to look under the bed if Joey would fit under there, Chandler opens the door inbetween the rooms, grabs Joey by his shirt and drags him to his room, and closes the door again)
Rachel: There's no room under the bed. (looks around because she can't find Joey anymore)
Rachel: Yeah... (still looking to see where Joey went, and opens the door)
Rachel: Yeah, sure... (looks outside into the corridor if Joey is there)
(Monica and Chandler's room. Phoebe, Monica and Chandler have their ears pressed against the wall, and Joey looks at them)
Phoebe: Shhh... This is the listening side of the wall.
(Now Joey also wants to listen, and wants to press his ears against the door, which has a big mirror on it, he hesitates seeing himself in the mirror, but still puts his ear against it. We move again to Rachel's room.)
Ross: And then she told me that she and Joey had broken up, and that part of the reason was that she had feelings for me.
Ross: And you know I wanted to ask Charlie out since the day I met her.
Rachel: (now looking up at the ceiling) That is hard to say, Ross. That is hard to say.
(Ross leaves the room)
(Joey now enters the room through the door, Monica, Chandler and Phoebe are following him.)
Monica: Yeah, but he wants to talk to you before anything really happens with her. And as his friend, I mean, don't you think he deserves the same from you?
Rachel: All right, look you guys... Look, we appreciate all the advice, but this is between Joey and me and I think we can handle it...
Chandler: Okay, well we'll go back in there, but will you do one thing for us? The people that care about you?
(They leave and Rachel locks the door.)
Rachel: (Joey walks to the door) Although...
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's room. Chandler is packing when Ross knocks on the door and enters...]
Chandler: Not quite. Monica's still at the salon, and I'm just finishing packing.
(Charlie now also enters the room, Chandler walks to the bathroom)
Ross: Uh, no... no. I couldn't find him. I'm just gonna talk to him on the plane.
Ross: Uh, actually I think she went to the salon.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, oh, she went to the salon alright...
(Monica enters, with her hair braided and little shells at the end)
(Chandler enters from the bathroom)
Monica: And listen to this... (shakes her body so the shells tingle)
Chandler: What d'ya know... It's a treat for the eyes and the ears.
[Scene: Boarding the plane.]
Ross: Oh, I uh, I mean, I... dude, I spent the whole conference with Charlie.
Phoebe: Uhm... You know, once we're in the air and the captain turns off the seatbelt sign... you feel free to roam about my cabin...
Mike: Maybe I'll sign for it. Tear it open. Pull out the packing material...
Ross: Right, I'm gonna go talk to Joey. I think this is the right time. He's always in a good mood after the flight attendant says "duty free".
Rachel: Okay, well keep in mind that by the time you're done, they'll probably be serving dinner.
Joey: I'm gonna get the lasagna.
Ross: Okay, last night after you guys broke up... so sorry to hear about that, by the way... Well, Charlie and I were talking, and..., well...
Ross: I am speachless... I mean the fact that you would put my happiness first like that. I mean, you're an incredible friend, you know that?
(They both hug, and Rachel, who was in the back of the plane, sees this and smiles.)
(Ross walks to the back of the plane, where Rachel is.)
[Scene: Mike's apartment. Phoebe's there and the phone rings.]
Mike: Oh, err... no, she's not here yet. You know, I think I'm just gonna take off and break up with her over the phone...
Phoebe: Her name is Precious? Is she a purebreed or did you pick her up at the pound?
Phoebe: Okay, oh and you know, if she gets upset, just scratch her tummy and give her a liver snout. (laughs and hangs up the phone)
(there's knocking on the door which Phoebe opens)
Precious: Phoebe? Mike's ex-girlfriend Phoebe, the love of his life? That Phoebe?
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Monica's carrying the laundry hamper to their coffee table.]
Monica: Oh, I can't wait for everyone at work to see these... (plays with her hair to make the shells tingle again) Ow!
Chandler: So if you want people to see them, then by definition you're not having them taken out... say, at the break of dawn?
Monica: Well, if I had them taken out, then I wouldn't be able to do this. (she pushes Chandler on the couch and brushes her hair and shells against Chandler's chest) You like that, right? (again, she brushes her hair against his chest and hums...)
Chandler: It's "Ride of the Valkyries" from "Apocalypse Now"... See, here's the thing: The corn rose were really a solution to your frizzy hair problem. And now that we're home, we don't have that problem anymore, so if you think about it... I hate them!
Chandler: Again, let's journey back... As I recall what Rachel said, was she had never notice the shape of your skull before. And Joey... Well, Joey didn't realise that there was anything different.
Chandler: Hit yourself in the tooth?
Monica: And the eye!
[Scene: Ross's apartment.Someone's knocking on the door. Ross rushes to the door and it's Rachel with Emma.]
Rachel: Okay, uhm... alright, here's the deal.
Ross: Duh, you think? (enters the kitchen)
[Scene: Mike's place. Phoebe is on the phone.]
Phoebe: Okay, bye. Alright, so Mike's on his way over. See, you thought you guys were meeting here, and he thought you were meeting at the restaurant, so you know... Doesn't really matter who's right or wrong. Point is... I'm gonna take off.
Phoebe: Yeah, I can't say that. uhm... Susie, I'm gonna be straight with you... Mike and I are back together... and uhm... unfortunately that effectively ends your relationship with him. And he's very sorry about that and wishes you the best of luck in all your endeavours.
Precious: I mean, what the hell am I supposed to do now?
Phoebe: Damn it woman, pull yourself together! Have some pride, for the love of God.
Phoebe: Okay, not a fan of the tough love.
Precious: He proposed to you? This is the worst birthday ever. (she starts to cry again)
(Mike enters the apartment.)
(she slaps him in the face, Mike looks like he doesn't believe what just happened. Precious leaves, and he turns to Phoebe.)
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's. Only Chandler is in the living room and walks to the bathroom.]
(Chandler enters the bathroom, and Monica is standing there in a towel, with her hair stuck in the shower curtain.)
Monica: Oh, well, I can move... (she moves back and forth the shower curtain rail, opening and closing the shower curtain with her hair as she goes)
Chandler: If I untangle you, will you please get rid of the corn rose?
Joey: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no... I think it's better if you tell him, you know. It's easier for a woman. That way, you know, if he gets mad, all you have to do is go... I didn't mean it. I'm so so--ooory. (he pushes his breasts together from the side)
Joey: Yeah! Good night! (they give each other a small kiss on the mouth, and stare at each other for a while)
Monica: Look what I found in the drawer... (Chandler looks up from his book.) And you said I'd never wear this...
Chandler: (Picks up the "Miss Congeniality" DVD) She's an FBI agent, posing as a beauty contestant.
THE END
The Guys: Yeah!
(Another sweaty woman comes to the door and speaks to her friend)
(Jamie Buchman and Fran Devanow enter the coffee house. They look about them as Jamie removes her coat and scarf.)
Joey: Oh, .. uh... uh... pass. (Next word: "Rotunda") Pass. (Next word: "Filibuster" stares at it a moment) Pass. (Henrietta is looking very confused) (Next word: "Addendum" 4 seconds remaining) Okay, the little thing that hangs down at the back of your throat.
CHANDLER: April 18th, excessive noise. Italian guy's gay roommate comes home with the dry-cleaning. Well that's excellent.
Rachel: Ohh, you're so sweet! (She kicks Katie in the shin.)
Chandler: My favorite part was when Superman flew all the Jews out of Egypt. (Glaring at Joey whos nodding.)
[Scene: The Jewelry Store, Phoebe is busy trying on virtually everything in the store. Shes got earrings, rings, bracelets, and enough necklaces to put Mr. T to shame on.]
Phoebe: Oh, I have dinner plans with Joey. We get together about once a month to discuss the rest of you guys.
Monica: Y'know, I-I-I don't think that I can. So if you don't mind, maybe this will be it for me on the work things.
Phoebe: Okay, well Ill bring them by tomorrow morning. Okay, and uh, by the way, theyre not actually puppies, theyre Frank and Alices triplets. Okay, see ya! (Exits.)
Monica: Yeah, you really shouldn't. (to Ross, sarcastically) By the way, how was that year-long dig in Cairo?
Tim: Wow! Umm, okay. Umm (To Phoebe) I-I-I realize I came on a little strong but, its only because I think youre so amazing. (To Monica) And uh, I-I just wanna, I just wanna tell you how much I appreciate you giving me an opportunity here because Iyoure the most talented chef Ive ever worked for. Anyway (Starts to leave and Phoebe and Monica trade looks.)
Rachel: Oh well, y'know, the gala had to end sometime.
Phoebe: Okay! (Runs that way and hears another whistle blast.) Hey! (Heads the other way and hears another blast.) What do I do?!! (She runs in the second direction and finds that the whistling is coming from inside a rack. She moves the dresses out of the way to find Rachel curled up in a fetal position frantically blowing on the whistle.) What are you doing? (Rachel doesnt stop.) Did you find the dress? (Rachel wont stop so Phoebe pinches her nose shut which causes her to spit the whistle out.)
Chandler: Oh, it wasn't a big deal. I just went to a couple of bookstores, talked to a couple of dealers... called a couple of the author's grandchildren.
Ross: Uh, you know, you can't always get a seat on the subway, so... (laughs stupidly)
Joey: Its the chick! Shes going through some changes.
[Scene: The Moondance Diner.]
(They both try to slowly extricate themselves from Ross, but theres a knock on the door that awakens him.)
Chandler: Thanks. (He takes off the vest and throws it on the floor.)
Tour Guide: Maybe its crazy in a perfect world, a world without lab coats and blazers, but you not in a perfect world, you in a museum now. See that scientist in the classes, he and I used to play together all the time in grade school, but now (Turns around) Peter! Hey, Peter! Its me Rhonda! From PS-129! I shared my puddin which you man! I gave you my Snack Pack! (to Joey) See, he pretend he dont even here me!
Joey: Whats the matter, Pheebs?
Monica: (Into the phone) Hello? Chandler, what's wrong? (She listens) Oh my God, are you alright? (listens some more) Yeah, I'll be right there. (She hangs up and speaks to Amanda) I'm so sorry, but Chandler was in a car accident. (She gets up)
Frank: (noticing the puppy) Oh, whos this little guy?! (Grabs the puppy)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time lapse. Rachel is entering the living room from her bedroom as Monica enters.]
(Joey turns and is angry that Chandler didnt come up with the answer.)
Phoebe: What the hell is this?! What, did you actually thought it would make me feel better to give me stuff that I cant use for another two months?! This sucks! All right, whats my next present?!
Joey: Home sweet home, huh? Nice to, uh, get back to reality. Plus we know how the New Years gonna go off. I guess theres no reason for all that Y2K panic, yknow? Anyway, gnight!
All: Yeah! Yes! (They all right into the living room, all excited.)
Joey: Oh, hey listen! The Soapies called today and I also get to present an award.
Ross: No, four minutes ago you had a half hour, we have to be out the door at twenty to eight.
[Scene: A Theater, the gang is in the audience wating for a play of Joey's to start.]
Ross: Than I want mine, too (takes the bowl from Joey)! And if I win I'm gonna put it all into a very low-yield bond.
[Pete enters with his entourage all pumped up, and Ross and Monica are the only ones who stand up and cheer.]
Dr. Long: (To Joey) Uh, if you have any questions, heres some information on Braxton-Hicks. (Hands Joey a pamphlet.) Oh and by the way, you did the right thing by bringing her in. Youre gonna make a wonderful father.
Monica: Ohh Oh, thats okay I hate when people come back to complement the chef. Like I have nothing better to do! So whats up?
Donny: ...should be playing with the star of "General Hospital" Leslie Charleson. (applause) Welcome everybody. Good luck to all of you. Let's play Pyramid. All right? Now... we flipped a coin before the show, Gene, you won the toss, so you're gonna start. Which category would you like?
Carol: (answering the door) Hi!
Ross: No ah-ah-ah! Do not start this car! (She starts the car.) Okay! Okay! I will give you twenty bucks if you get out of this car right now! (He looks for the twenty Rachel stole and doesnt find it.)
[knock at the door]
Chandler: (to Rachel) You know what I just realized? We have no idea what we're doing in the wedding tomorrow.
Monica: Are you nuts?! We've got George Stephanopoulos' pizza! (Rachel pays him, Monica grabs some binoculars, and runs to the window.)
RADIO: The next one's dedicated to Rachel from Ross. Rachel, he wants you to know he's deeply sorry for what he did and he hopes you can find it in your heart to forgive him. (With or Without You plays)
Phoebe: Wow, that's great! I liked that better than the law thing, so...
Ross: Ooh. What is the name of Chandlers fathers Las Vegas all-male burlesque?
[All by myself is playing. Chandler is sitting in front of a window while it's raining outside. We see Joey through a rainy window. The camera zooms out to show it's just his tabletop water sculpture.]
(Monicas entrance makes Phoebe try to hide the ring by putting it in her mouth.)
CHANDLER: Oh it's uh, over there on the table.
CHANDLER: Hey, how's the first day goin'?
Phoebe: (Removing one of the strips) Ow-ow-ow-ow! Oh my God!!!
Emily: Ohh, I dont think so. I mean it would be different if it was way into the future and-and-and we were getting married or something.
Mr. Geller: Oh my God! This is so exciting! Well, get back in there! (Points to the closet) Ill guard the door!
Rachel: Well, yeah, yknow how Ross and I were on again, off again, on again, off again? I guess I just figured that somewhere down the road, we would be on again.
Ross: Fun? Where was the fun? Tell me specifically, which part was the fun part? Where's my puck?
Ross: I was kinda, supposed to be on TV tonight for The Discovery Channel.
Mr. Thompson: And finally, our biggest item of the night, the 22-foot gentlemans day sailer sailboat. The winning bid was a whooping $20,000! (Joey suddenly gets excited.)
Rachel: has your girlfriend got the butt?
Ross: Nothing, ah there was this thing at the museum. Come on. (they go into her apartment) Easy.
(Monica enters and Chandler screams stuff at the TV.)
[Scene: The Set, Joey, Janine, Ross and Monica are walking in.]
[the tape cuts to Monica's parents under the covers]
Chandler: (shocked) Well I mean, let me get the door first. (Goes and opens the door.) Oh, hi! No one. (Exits.)
Chandler: Oh, who should I blame? The nice bell man who had to drag out luggage to 10 different rooms?
Chandler: (to the girls who are staring at him) What?
Rachel: How was the beach?
Ross: Ooh, hey Ben, what if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the Festival of Lights?
CHANDLER: I was looking forward to playing basketball, but I guess that's out the window.
Jason: Ahh-ahh, we'd better call the fire department!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachels, Monica has finally given up on her search to find what the light switch does and is now flicking it on and off aimlessly.]
[Scene: The Theatre, Joey and Kate are rehearsing.]
(Ross flips the coin again.)
[Scene: Central Perk. Everybody's sitting on the couch and Monica is eating a chunk of cake.]
Phoebe: (to the person that answered the door) Hi, Ursula.
Chandler: Oh no-no-no, I will do it. Honey, you have to learn to sit down and relax and let your husband take care of things once and awhile. (Tries the door.) Its locked, you have to help me. Why is it locked?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is reading The Shining, as Monica enters.]
(The door across the hall opens and a guy walks into Ross's apartment.)
Ross: Ok, no, no, you hang up. You, you, y(Rachel grabs the phone and hangs it up for him.)
Monica: Oh, and by the way, hes lost a bunch of weight. I mean he looks goo-ood! Okay, I mean really, really gorgeous! (Joey clears his throat.) I still love Chandler.
Monica: (puts down the lasagne) I just... can't do it.
Ross: Nooo, I had to return it to the costume place.
Phoebe: (To Ross) For what it's worth, we would have caught her if we were at the right airport.
[Scene: Central Perk, ??????? is playing, as Chandler peaks his head out of the storage closet and sneaks back to his seat and pretends he's reading something. Then a short while later Monica pokes her head out of the closet and sneaks back to her seat and sits down, pretending as if nothing has happened.]
Ross: Ross has the blender! Ugh, everything's just falling apart!
Monica: Chasing him all around the room?
Phoebe: Okay. All right you yellow-bellied-lilly-livered-DRAW!! (they both kick up the foot rests like an old fashioned gun fight.)
Rachel: Its good. Except he makes us watch the Discovery Channel all day long. Did you know that something really boring happened to someone really ugly in the Middle Ages? (to the waitress handing her a cup of coffee) Oh, thank you. Ill see you guys later.
(Mr. Douglas screws up his eyes, trying to credit what Bing has just said, but turning to follow Nina down the corridor, he realises Bing must be telling the truth, since he would not have any personal interest in the girl, would he?)
Monica: All right, we still have a minute and a half to go, and were down by two points. Two points.... (she gets interrupted by the guys, who are doing a slow-motion high five.) Phoebe you do a button-hook again. Rachel, you go long.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is talking on the phone.]
Chandler: Pulling flowers out it makes the bag look a lot more masculine.
[Chandler and Monica are by the window pressuring Ross to tell his parents the truth.]
Monica: Youre wrong! The centerpieces are fine! Do you ever get scared at all?
[Scene: Central Perk. Charlie is sitting on the couch and Ross enters.]
Rachel: (coming from the bathroom) Hey Pheebs?
(She turns and looks in the mirror, and its way, way over done. She looks like she has two black eyes.)
MRS BUFFAY: Schnoodle. Oh my God, what the hell happened to my dog?
Rachel: You know the book says that whenever shes sleeping I should be sleeping so (She gives Monica thumbs and goes to lay down)
[Scene: Monicas childhood bedroom (which has been turned into a gym), Monica is lying on the treadmill as Phoebe enters.]
Rachel: So whats the final head count on my baby shower?