words in movies
SUSAN: The other us.
ROSS: Why wouldn't I want to come? I had fun at the first wedding.
JOEY: It really hit me last night. I'm gonna be on Days of our Lives. And then I started thinkin' about all of u, and how these are the days of our lives..
MONICA: They want me to do it, which is really cool, seeing as I've never catered before, and I really need the money, and this isn't a problem for you, is it?
MONICA: They love each other, and they wanna celebrate that love with the people that are close with them.
CHANDLER: [singing to the tune of Mister Rogers' Neighborhood] Who's the bitterest man in the living room, the bitterest man in the living room? Hi, neighbor.
JOEY: Hey, if she were marrying a guy, she'd be like the worst lesbian ever.
JOEY: Yeah, and she's really nice too. She taught me all about how to work the cameras, and smell-the-fart acting.
JOEY: I'm afraid the situation is much worse than we expected. Your sister is suffering from a..subcranial hematoma. Perhaps we can discuss this over coffee.
JOEY: All right, all right. "Damnit Braverman, it's right there on the chart!"
PHOEBE: Um, no, huh-uh. One of my clients died on the massage table today.
PHOEBE: Yeah, it's just so strange. I mean, she probably woke up today and thought, "ok, I'll have some breakfast, and then I'll take a little walk, and then I'll have my massage." Little did she know God was thinking, "Ok, but that's it." Oh, but the weirdest thing was, ok, I was cleansing her aura when she died, and when the spirit left her body, I don't think it went very far.
CHANDLER: Well, of course, lambs are scarier. Otherwise the movie would've been called Silence of the Ducks.
ROSS: Oh, I believe I had the half-drunk cappuccino with the lipstick on the rim.
CHANDLER: Yes, and this with the cigarette butt in it, is that decaf?
RACHEL: I know, but it's just it's the first time, and I just don't want her to think that because I didn't marry Barry, that my life is total crap, you know?
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] Talk about crap. Try listening to Stella Niedman tell the story of her and Rod Steiger for the hundredth time.
MRS GREEN: Sweetie! So this is where you work? Oh, it's wonderful! Is it a living room? Is it a restaurant? Who can tell? But I guess that's the fun.
MRS GREEN: So, what do you think of my daughter in the apron with the big job?
MRS GREEN: If you didn't pour the coffee, no one would have anything to drink.
MRS GREEN: This is just so exciting. You know, I never worked. I went straight from my father's house to the sorority house to my husband's house. I am just so proud of you.
PHOEBE: I know who it is you remind me of. Evelyn Dermer. 'Course, that's before she got the lousy face lift. Now she looks like Soupy Sales.
MRS GREEN: Oh my god, there's an unattractive nude man playing the cello.
RACHEL: I know. And Mom, I realize you and Daddy were upset when I didn't marry Barry and get the big house in the suburbs with all the security and everything, but this is just so much better for me, you know?
MR A: Well, I don't know what to tell you dear. The only thing I can think of is that she always used to say that before she died, she wanted to see everything.
MRS GREEN: Oh, look, here's Barry. Did he have to come straight from the office?
RACHEL: Actually, what I think you said was, "don't touch that, and get the hell out of my kitchen."
PHOEBE: [enters] Hey. What a day. I took her everywhere. The Museum of Modern Art, Rockefeller Center, Statue of Liberty.
PHOEBE: Yeah. I guess she hasn't seen everything yet. I'll be right back, she has to go to the bathroom again. [Takes Mrs. Green's chin in her hand and says, in Mrs. Adelman's voice] Oh, such a pretty face.
MRS GREEN: This is so much fun, just the girls. You know what we should do? Does anybody have any marijuana?
MRS GREEN: The only man I've ever been with is your father.
JOEY: I'm sorry, it's the pigs. they're reluctant to get in the blankets!
MONICA: All right, look, Ross. I realize that you have issues with Carol and Susan, and I feel for you, I do. But if you don't help me cook, I'm gonna take a bunch of those little hot dogs, and I'm gonna create a new appetizer called "pigs in Ross". All right, ball the melon.
CHANDLER: Hey! How come I'm stuck dicing, when he gets to ball the melon.
[knock at the door]
ROSS: What's the matter?
CAROL: Nothing. Ok, everything. I think we're calling off the wedding.
ROSS: Carol, what's the matter? What happened?
CAROL: And then Susan and I got in this big fight because I said maybe we should call off the wedding, and she said we weren't doing it for them, we were doing it for us, and if I couldn't see that, then maybe we should call off the wedding. I don't know what to do.
ROSS: Well then that's it. And if George and Adelaide can't accept that, then the hell with them. Look, if my parents didn't want me to marry you, no way that would have stopped me. Look, this is your wedding. Do it.
MONICA: You heard the woman. Peel, chop, devil! I can't believe I lost 2 minutes.
[at the wedding]
JOEY: It just seems so futile, you know ? All these women, and nothing. I feel like Superman without my powers, you know? I have the cape, and yet I cannot fly.
CHANDLER: Well now you understand how I feel every single day, ok? The world is my lesbian wedding.
[Monica pushes Ben down the aisle in a stroller. Susan is escorted by both her parents. Carol is escorted by Ross.]
[At the reception, Monica and Ross watch Carol and Susan getting their picture taken.]
JOEY: [to a wedding guest] How's that pig-in-the-blanket workin' out for you? [the guy nods] I wrapped those bad boys.
[Chandler tries to warn Phoebe that the woman is coming on to her, but Phoebe doesn't see him.]
CHANDLER: [to an attractive woman] I shouldn't even bother coming up with a line, right? [The woman walks away]
MRS GREEN: Oh, am I! I just danced with a wonderfully large woman. And three other girls made eyes at me over the buffet. Oh, I'm not saying it's something I wanna pursue, but it's nice to know I have options.
CHANDLER: [to the woman who just rejected him] All right look. Penis schmenis. We're all people. [She walks away again.]
MONICA: Ok, which one of us do you think is gonna be the first one to get married?
JOEY: I got one. Which one of us do you think will be the last to get married? [They all look at Chandler]
JOEY: Incredible! I met the director this time and you'll never believe who it was.
Phoebe: Hi! Oh, Alice, hi! Thanks. Im so glad you could come, cause Ive got a real umm, Home Ec emergency. (Points to the table cloth, which has a huge mustard stain on it.)
(Ross closes the door slowly.)
[Scene: The Bings�. Monica in bathrobe, merely covered. Someone�s knocking at the door.]
Joey: Well, the duck
[Scene: Outside the restaurant, Melissa, Phoebe, and Rachel are emerging.]
Rachel: So how is the uhm... baby styling business going?
Phoebe: (calling from her room) Are you under the sheet?
Joanna: (answering the phone) Yes. (listens) Uh, cant you wait until tomorrow? (listens) All right. (hangs up) Unbelievable!!
(They go into the hall.)
Chandler: No, the little girl creeps me out.
[Scene: The Set, everyone is dancing.]
Joey: (Jumping out of his way) See ya!! (To the girls.) What the hell was that?!
Chandler: Y'know what, I'm, I'm gonna spend some alone time with the pen.
Jake: All right. Bye. (Backs out the door.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is on the couch as Ross enters.]
Monica: Oh, is that so? Ok. If that's really what you want, then here... I give you the headset. Well, I don't really want to give you the headset. Well I guess if you're taking over, you should probably return these messages. (hands her a stack of papers with messages and calls to return)
Chandler: No-no all kids are embarrassed by their parents, youd have to come up with a whole new word for what I went through. When I was in High School, he used to come to all of my swim meets dressed as a different Hollywood starlet. Yknow its hard enough to be fourteen. Youre skinny. Youre wearing speedoesThat your mom promised that you would grow into! And you look up into the stands and theres your dad cheering you on dressed as Carmen Miranda. We was wearing a headdress with real fruit that he will later hand out to your friends as a healthy snack!
Phoebe: Ok, this is not about the MONEY, ok? It's about... it's about corporate greed destroying our hearts and leaving us... the hollow shells.
Joey: Hey, I got one keyhole and about a zillion keys. You do the math.
JOEY: (entering) Man, I got this close to him (holds up his fingers) and Monica kneed me in the back. What's going on?
Ross: Oh yeah! Wasnt she uh (Does the international sign for big boobies.)
JOEY: Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'
Chandler: (To Ross) Thanks for picking out the earrings man.
Chandler: Yep! From now on its gonna be the four of you guys and me and the misses. The little woman. The wife. The old ball and chain.
Ross: Oh whats the big deal?! I wasnt even invited to the ceremony, just the reception. And-and yknow what? If it makes you feel any better, Joan and I will just make an appearance and then, and then well-well leave early as a sign of protest.
(Meanwhile the race has been won by Phoebe's bear, followed by Joey's robot)
Ross: Then we have to await the data from recent MRI scans and DNA testing which call into question information gathered from years of simple carbon dating.
Rachel: Oh, I have to go tell Monica what a wonderful brother she has! (Kisses him on the cheek and exits.)
Rachel: (hanging up the phone) I got the job!
Rachel: Oh Ross, come on! This is not, this is not a marriage!! This is the worlds worst hangover! Ross, listen, if you do not get this annulment, I will!
JOEY: No, as part of the audition. See, I'm up for this part of this guy, who the main guy kisses.
CHANDLER AND JOEY: Hi. We're the guys who called about the baby. We left the baby on ths bus. Is he here? Is he here?
Joey: Look, I got to apologize on the behalf of Carl.
Chandler: Make sure you put all that stuff back in the closet, okay?
Ben: (singing) Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer...
Rachel: You're sister? You're sister's asleep on the couch? (Danny nods, "Yes.") Ohhh! I saw her with you on the subway and now she's asleep on the couch!
Joey: The vicar!
Monica: What is wrong with this freezer?! (She jabs her arm into the freezer and a piece of ice flies into her eye.) Ow! Ow!!
Monica: Well, this is the last box of your clothes. Im just gonna label it, "What were you thinking?"
Joey: And, a brownie! (Hands her a bag with the brownie in it.) Well, half a brownie. Actually, its just bag. Its been a long walk from the flower shop and I was startin to feel faint so
(Ursula opens the door and hands her the note.)
Phoebe: You mean the chocolate chip cookie recipe?
Chandler: Hey! Hows the boat?!
Joey: Why would I do that? It took three guys to get the thing in there!
Chandler: Yeah it is really pricey. I mean, I freaked when I first heard the numbers.
Phoebe: Right, yeah, ok, I'll ask the butler to fetch my diamonds out of the vault.
Chandler: Oh, so youre going with the teacher, huh?
The Cooking Teacher: Okay Joey, youre up next. (Tries one of his cookies.) This are good! This is amazing! You get an A!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is looking at the wedding book as Monica enters.]
Phoebe: Wait. Why was he yelling at her? Hes the one who slept with someone else.
Monica: What did I tell you about the hall?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Ross are inspecting the damage to the dollhouse.]
Phoebe: Yeah, but you have to keep the name too!
Joey: Hi! How are the Gellers?
Joey: Fine! (He slams on the brakes, stopping the car on the bridge to the sound of numerous car horns.) Get out!
Rachel: Dont say that I have no sentiment! (Starts to show Ross whats in the box.) This is a movie stub from our first date! This is an eggshell from the first time you made me breakfast in bed! (Holds up a bone) This is from the museum from the first time we were together. Okay, maybe I exchange gifts sometimes, but I keep the things that matter!
Chandler: What the hell happened?!! How were you locked in?!! And where the hell is all of our stuff?!!
Joey: Yeah, he did, look... look, it's right there on the counter! Ha-ho-ho!
Ross: Oh... (to the others) Little heads-up would have been nice.
Monica: He took up the carpet, and now you can hear everything.
Ross: (starts to cry) FINE BY ME!! (he opens the door and traps Chandler behind it)
Joey: (realizing) Oh, that's what she meant! (pause) You know, if they're gonna shorten it, they should call it the MUSE! You know, short for museum, and avoid all the confusion!
Phoebe: (answering the phone) (whispering) Ross, thank God.
Rachel: (Running back out the door with her passport.) Bye, Pheebs.
Passerby: Maybe because youve got the keys?
Hold Voice: Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
(The phone rings.)
Rachel: Oh my God! I bet thats him. My digital fairy tale is about to begin. I wonder how I should be? Should I be uh (In a sexy voice) Hello? Or should I be (Happily) Hi! Its Rach (Phoebe knocks the phone out of Rachels hand, catches it, and answers it.) Would you stop doing that?!
Phoebe: What the hell is this, herbal tea? I hate herbal tea!
Paul: I wanted to be one with the waves, yknow?
Joey: But between you and Phoebe, Id have to give the edge to Phoebe.
[Scene: The hospital. Rachel is pouring her self a cup of coffee. Ross approaches from behind.]
Monica: It's in the kitchen, I'll go get it.
Phoebe: Did you find the dress?
Phoebe: No that's just me coughing! (Doing some weird coughing noises and the dog barks again. Phoebe comes out of the room.) Oh, good, there you are! Listen, um, I have a dog in my room.
Larry: Just walking past the kitchen I saw 10 violations! I'm shutting this place down!
Ross: See but, Pheebs that-that is the exact opposite intent of my music. Yknow my music is-is meant to inspire, and if it bothers you this much, then I I wont play anymore.
[Scene: Phoebes, Frank and her, are sitting on the counh, watching TV]
Monica: (coming out of the bedroom) You jerk! You know how much I love that kid! (starts to chase Ross around the living room)
Cheryl: Okay, um, don't take this the wrong way, but your place kinda has a weird smell.
Ross: Okay Phoebe, I guess youre next (To Joey) although I really dont see the point.
Phoebe: Are you leaving "The Supremes"? (Monica and Phoebe go to one side)
MONICA: Huuh, alright, Danny Arshak, ninth grade. Oh, c'mon Rach, you know the bottle was totally pointing at me.
Phoebe: Thats right, exactly. (sees them) All right, its a good bye kiss, thats good. (Frank picks Alice up and they move to the couch) Bye-bye. (They both lie down on the couch and start to make out.) Okay, no, the important thing is that you see what Im saying, y'know, just y'know, this is clearly wrong. (They ignore her) Okay, Ive decided Im gonna let this happen! Okay, can I just get my purse? (She reaches in and Alice moans) Okay, all right, good. (leaves).
Alice: (running in from the elevator) Am I too late?!
[Cut to the inside of the apartment.]
RACHEL: I can not believe I have to walk down the aisle in front of 200 people looking like something you drink when your nauseous.
[Scene: The house Monica and Chandler are viewing. Janice comes down the stairs.]
Rachel: Wow. (she exhales in amazement, blowing the candle out)
Chandler: I haven't... I haven't even thought about the results yet... I just assumed that everything was gonna be ok.
Joey: Hey, I wasn't the only one who looked like an idiot. All right? Remember when Ross tried to say, "Butternut squash?" And it came out, "Squatternut buash?"
[Scene: Rosss office, hes opening the door to Elizabeth.]
[Scene: The airport, Elizabeths flight is about to leave and Ross is there to send her off.]
Judge: Would you like to spend the night in jail?
(Inside the apartment the phone rings.� Ross answers it.)
Monica: The basket is totally empty! My God, the neighbors ate all the candy!
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont, is tied up alongside the pier; Joey and Rachel are relaxing.]
Chandler: That's perfect! That's brilliant! (Starts going through the photo album)
Rachel: (to Ross) I can't believe you don't want to know. I mean, I couldn't not know, I mean, if, if the doctor knows, and Carol knows, and Susan knows....