words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica, Rachel, Ross, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is looking out the window.]
CHANDLER: So whaddya got there Monica?
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
MR. TREEGER: Uhh, you said there was a party.
JOEY: Uh, listen Phoebs, I know you're not goin' in there but do you think it'd be alright if I went in and used his bathroom? Oh, that's fine, never mind. Cool, snow, kinda like a blank canvas.
PHOEBE: Yeah, yeah, no it's OK 'cause, I mean, I know he's there, so, that's enough for now.
Chandler: Theres no back to this couch!
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Phoebe: Oh, its bad. Its really bad. The only thing in there that isnt burned is an ass. Which I do not remember buying!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are there.]
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there.]
Phoebe: Ah! Well! There you go! Last to know again! And I'm guessing... since nobody told me... this is Paolo.
(Theres an awkward silence.)
Janice: Im telling you Rachel, listen to Janice. They all say theyre gonna be there until they start their real family.
Rachel: Get your hands out of there! No!
[Scene: Chandler's office. Joey is there.]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Joey and Chandler are there, waiting for their dates to show up.]
Gunther: (In his head) Say Rachel, I was wondering if youd like to go to a movie with me sometime. As my lover! Nnnsch, to out there. Maybe youd just like to ah, get something to eat with me sometime? As my lover.
Monica: Oh my God, that place has the creamiest frosting! I use to hitchhike there when I was a kid.
Rachel: Well yeah, but then I remembered I started it and there was this pep rally and I was, I was on top of the pyramid but anywayumm, what is this book about?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Ross, Joey, and Phoebe are there waiting for Chandler's cyberchick to arrive]
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
[Scene: Estelle Leonard Theatrical Agency, Joey is there to see his agent.]
Joey: Its uh, right through there. (Points.)
Monica: (to the restuarant customers) Excuse me, excuse me, hi, I'm Monica Geller..I'm the head chef here.. (pauses as if waiting for something).. Ok, I was actually expecting a little applause there, but whatever! Ok, quick question: by a show of hands, how many of you were bothered by this woman's singing outside? (a few people raise their hands)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there. Chandler enters.]
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Monica: Phoebe! You're sick, you shouldn't play. You should just go home, get in bed, and stay there.
Chandler: Im sorry man, theres never a good time to (pauses) stop catching on fire.
Joey: Uh, well he did not get sick somewhere in there and it was immediately found and properly cleaned up!
Joey: No you dont, I just saw you go in there with Monica!
Phoebe: Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in case Rachels dessert is...[about to say bad] so good that I eat all of it. Theres none left for anybody else!
[Time lapse. Melanie, Joey's girlfriend, is there with Joey, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel. Ross is gone.]
Ross: Is there somebody else?
Joey: Okay, but lets say there was. How might that go?
Chandler: There are snow cones! (Monica glares at him.) Snow cones! Yuck!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there, waiting to tell Frank and Alice the news.]
(There is a knock on Rachel and Phoebes door.)
Chandler: You just thought of that in there?
Joey: Shes right in there. (motions to the living room)
Ross: Oh, oh there go the clothes.
Ross: But, Elizabeth and I are-are both adults and so I dont think theres really anything you can do about it.
Chandler: Honey, it is not a date! I havent talked to her in ten years! You cant just call up somebody you havent talked to in ten years and ask them for a favor. There are rules, yknow? You gotta, you got to put in some time.
Joey: He can still catch her! Come on, get out of there! (He opens the box) Get out of there!
Dr. Leedbetter: There may have been a-a joke or a limerick of some kind.
Gunther: I thought you were Chandler. But umm, one of who is over there.
Chandler: No, there were two.
Joey: (shocked) Thats mean! You really had me going there!
Gunther: (to Chandler) Oh, no-no, no-no-no, theres none of that in here.
Phoebe: No, you can't go there! You know how I feel about these "big massage places"! They're putting people like me out of business!
Chandler: Thats still in there?!
Chandler: Oh? Did somebody miss me? Is there a child to raise poorly?
Estelle: Well, I think uhh, someone out there may have been bad mouthing you all over town.
Ross: Hey there little fella! Hey, uh-hey, why dont we get some shoes on ya, huh? Hey, why dont you show dad how you can put your shoes on, in your room! Yay!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone is there. Monica is watching stock prices on a business channel.]
Rachel: (to the closed door) Hang in there. You hang in there. (Gives him the raspberry.)
[Scene: Carol and Susans, there is a knock on the door and Carol opens it to reveal Rachel.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. The others are still there.]
Janice: (entering) Hey there Ross!
Chandler: All right, check it out. Check this out. It says here that theres a place you can go to rent videos of all the museums! (Reading from the book.) "Its almost as good as being there."
Chandler: I dunno, aren't there tests for these things, right?
Monica: Absolutely! (He goes to kiss her, but she stops him and rubs his head and says...) Now get out of here you!! (Pete leaves) (to the gang) Okay, Im running out of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am I only attracted to guys where theres no future? Either theyre too old, or theyre too young, and then theres Pete whos-whos crazy about me, and whos absolutely perfect for me, and theres like zip going on! I mean, seriously, does it sound like somethings wrong with me?!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are there]
Joey: Oh thats too bad. Ive kinda been saving up. (She just looks at him in horror.) Uh, are you sure theres no studies I can participate in?
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Jill enters.]
Ross: I got held up at Dr. Gettleman's office. There was some guy that freaked everybody out.
Phoebe: Are there anymore from the good batch? Cause we could just work off of those.
Joey: There you go! That's the spirit I'm looking for! What can we do? Huh? All right who's first? Huh? Ross?
Ross: What? Oh, okay. Wait here. (Goes to get it, but before he gets there Aunt Millie sits down on it forcing him to pull it out from behind her which gets her attention.)
Chandler: Theres a Mr. Bing!
[Joey's place. He goes to say something to Chandler in the other chair but no one's there. He goes to call Chandler but decides not to and throws the phone back down.]
Rachel: No! (Gets up to leave.) (Under her breath.) If there was I wouldn't tell you.
Joey: And scene! Huh? Wasnt that fun? We did a little improv there. Yeah! Okay! So you-you-you-you were saying?
Joey: I know, there are gonna be some pasty folks by the pool tomorrow! (A woman goes towards them)
Susan: Oh yeah, Im so excited, Ive never been there.
Ross: I told you it wasn�t long, but there is an amazing connection between us.
[Scene: Chandler's bedroom, Chandler wakes up, and finds someone else's hand on his chest. He rolls over and is shocked to see Janice there.]
DUNCAN: Well, I've never told you this but, there were one or two times, back in college, when I'd get really drunk, go to a straight bar and wake up with a woman next to me. But I, I, I told myself it was the liquor and e-everyone experiments in college.
Chandler: (To Ross) Well, there you are! So what did Elizabeth say?
Chandler: Okay, Ms. McKenna, she kind of works above my boss, she asked me to move to Tulsa and be the president of our office there, and I was sleeping and apparently, said yes.
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe, Rachel, Ross, and Ryan are there. Ryan is in uniform, getting ready to leave.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Joey are there.]
Joey: Uhh, do you mind sitting there. Im-Im saving this for my friend Ross.
Monica: What is it? Is there something fundamentally unmarriable about me?
Director: (To Joey) Okay, youre dancing with that girl over there.
Phoebe: There he is! (Points.)
The Museum Official: (on phone) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller. I want to let her know that there was a cancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, it is available (Chandler runs to answer the phone.)
Chandler: You okay over there?
Joey: Yeah, are you just going down there to gawk at that hot girl with the belly button ring again?
CHAN: [through gritted teeth] Alright. [clears his throat] "It was summer, and it was hot. Rachel was there. A lonely gray couch. 'Oh, look,' cried Ned, and then the kingdom was his forever. The end."
Mr. Geller: Well, I dont know whats in the boxes down here, but I do know there are six or seven Easy Bake Ovens in the attic.
Chandler: Don't ask me, I was in there canoodling you!
Rachel: Yeah honey, Im standing right there! Why didnt you just tell him about the mole I havent got checked yet.
Joey: There are?
(Theres a knock on the door, he shuts the TV off, and answers it.)
CHANDLER: For a minute there I thought you were actually tryin' to smell something.
Joey: I guess I'm going to have to come up with a really good reason why I wasn't there. The producers are going to be so mad at me. They sat us all down yesterday and said "Everyone has to be there at 6:00 AM sharp, that means you Tribbiani." Like.. like I was some kind of idiot.
[Cut to London, Chandlers hotel room. He is getting ready for bed by doing push-ups. One push-up. Just as he gets under the covers, theres a knock on the door.]
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, Im going to be out there spreading joy to the people. I mean, last year, I spread a little joy but not really enough. So this year, Im going to do the whole city.
Joey: Yeah for like a half an hour one night! Chandler, she wants you for the rest of her life! Youre so lucky! Look what I missed out on by not being there! Although you know what? It could never have worked like you guys did, cause you guys are perfect for each other. Yknow, we look at you and-and we see you together and it just it-it fits. Yknow? And you just know its gonna last forever.
Rachel: Alright. In high school I was the prom queen and I was the homecoming queen and the class president and you... were also there! But if you take this monkey, I will lose one of the most important people in my life. You can hate me if you want, but please do not punish him. C'mon, Luisa, you have a chance to be the bigger person here! Take it!
Rachel: Pheebs, this whole apartment thing is just a nightmare! Every place I can afford comes with a roommate who is a freak. I mean, look at this; (Points to one and starts to read it.) "Wanted. Female roommate, non-smoker, non-ugly." Its just, there is nothing! The citys full!
Ross: Hey Chandler, theres a party tomorrow, youll feel better then.
Ross: Okay, okay. If that is what it takes to show you how much you mean to me, and how much I want you there. Then that's what I'll do.
Monica: Well, it was the first time. Yknow, theres not always a lot of agreement the first time.
Megan: Oh no, these dresses are all so amazing but there is no way I could afford one.