words in movies
Joey: Oh no, no, no, let your dad get this.
Monica: Please... honey, leave the details to me. Now I wanna make this day as special for you as I can. Now, ok, I was thinking that the harpist should wear white.
Chandler: You look great. I'm so glad we're having this rehearsal dinner, you know, I so rarely get to practice my meals before I eat them.
Rachel: Well, this is really awkward (staring at the floor) Oh, and I can leave!
Chandler: This is like figure skating team all over again. (Phoebe and Ross glare at him astonished) I mean synchronized swimming. (they continue to glare) I mean- I mean the balance beam. (to Ross) Help me!
Ross: I can't believe we're gonna be the only people that aren't in this wedding.
Mike: You know, I really don't feel very comfortable making this decision. You know, Phoebe knows you better, I'm gonna let her choose. (he leaves)
Phoebe: And... moment's over! (Rachel, Joey and Chandler all turn and look disapprovingly towards Monica but she just shrugs it off) So, ok, uh, I can forget that. I can forget that and uhm... (she's flipping cards skipping half of them) Oh this is funny! Oh, but you need to know that to... that, to... Oh, ok, well, uhm, I (Monica is miming CUT). Ok, ok, I, ok, I.... MONICA I CAN'T DO IT LIKE THIS! THIS IS MY WEDDING! OKAY, I DON'T WANT THIS (she mimes Monica's when she was twirling her hands) OR THIS (she taps her watch) OR THIS (she mimes CUT) OK? I JUST WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING! WHERE MY FIANCEE CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM ANYTIME HE WANTS! (pause) You know what? You're done.
Rachel: Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.
Phoebe: Wow, this is a lot!
Monica: Uh-huh, but I'm sure you can handle this. I mean, I have won awards for my organizational skills, but, uh, I'm sure you'll do fine.
Ross: I have to talk to her about this groomsman situation, ok? I'm not gonna watch Chandler up there while I'm sitting in the seats like some chump! (he goes to Rachel's room, knocks the door and enters the room). (very fake gasp) Oh! My God! You're breathtaking!
Rachel: Oh, Ross, c'mon, please! Don't make this harder than it already is!
Mike: (looking around the room) This is... great...
Joey: Have a seat. (Mike sits on his bed, and Joey towers over him. He starts talking in an Italian godfather-type voice) Last night, I tried to welcome you into my family... and instead, you disrespect me... (shakes his head) I cannot allow this.
Joey: I want you to take this seriously! Phoebe is very very important to me, ok? And I wanna make sure that you are gonna take care of her.
Chandler: Hey, can I talk to you about this groomsman thing? If you pick Ross, he'll walk you down the isle just fine. But if you choose me, you'll be getting some comedy!
Chandler: Let me tell you why you need to pick me. (Goes to sit on the couch facing backwards to the kitchen. Rachel gets a chair and sits opposite him) See, when I was a kid, I was always left out of everything, you know, and it really made me feel... insecure. You know, I was always picked last in gym. Even behind that big fat exchange student who didn't even know the rules to baseball. I mean, this guy would strike out and then run to third. Anyway, If I'm the only one left out of this wedding, I just know that all those feelings are gonna come rushing back.
Joey: I'm glad we had this little talk.
Monica: (Obviously enjoying this setback) Ugh, I guess it got sent to the billing address as opposed to the shipping address. (by now she can barely keep herself from smiling) Uh! What a pickle.
Phoebe: (starting to panic) Oh my God, everything is such a mess. Why is this happening to me?
Ross: (barely containing himself at this point) Well, you have fun tonight.
Rachel: You know what, I can't do this. I don't know which one of you guys to pick.
Rachel: (sarcastic) Wow, this is a tough one. I think I'm gonna have to go with the dog.
Rachel: Well, look, it's hardly snowing anymore. I mean you couldn't ask for a more romantic setting. This could be the simple wedding you've always wanted!
Mike: (to Chandler and Ross) You know, Chappy's too small to handle all this snow. Someone's gonna have to walk him down the aisle.
Chandler: So technically, would this person be in the wedding?
Monica: Level 1 alert. I repeat, level 1. This is not a drill. Okay we've got a situation. The minister just called. He's snowed in. He can't make it.
Monica: So, you're ready to do this?
Phoebe: Uhuh, uhuh... Oh my God! This is really happening.
Monica: Okay. (in her microphone) It's zero hour. All teams execute on my count. (to all) Let's get this bad boy on the road.
Joey: Friends, family, dog... Thank you all for being here to witness this blessed event. The cold has now spread to my special place... so I'm gonna do the short version of this. Phoebe and Mike are perfect for each other. And I know I speak for every one here... when I wish them a lifetime of happiness. Who has the rings?
Joey: Oh, okay. Phoebe, do you take this man to be your husband?
Joey: Mike, do you take this woman to be your wife?
Ross: Come on Chappy, do your business. MAKE! MA-AKE! I did not sign on for this.
Ross: I see... Thanks very much. (he gets up and walks to the door. On his way out he looks at the photographs Mr Zelner has near his door. He picks one up.) Is this your son?
Chandler: So, this isn't over?
Voice: (on phone) Hey! Hey! Hey! This is 92.3, WXRK, K-Rock for our $1,000 daily challenge.
Rachel: This one? (Picks it up.)
Amy: This might be my one chance to have a baby Rachel. I mean, you know that I have been so busy focusing on my carrer.
MONICA: Yes but my mom got me this job.
Ross: No but but still you cant possibly do this alone.
Ross: Hey, youre not going to believe this. I made up a joke and sent it in to Playboy. They printed it!
Dina: Look, Rachels told me how much easier youve made all this on her. Why cant you do that for me?
Monica: Boy, I love carrots! Oh! (She picks up a bunch of them and holds them between her fingers.) Sometimes I like to put them between my fingers like this and-and hold them down here while I talk to you. (She is rubbing her hip with the carrots.) Umm, and-and-and y'know if I get really hot umm, I-I like to pick up this knife (She picks up a knife without putting the box down. She's holding the box between her cheek and shoulder) and-and umm, I-I put the cold steal against umm, (Pause) my body. (She doesn't have any exposed skin within reach of the knife, so while holding the carrots in one hand and the box between her face and shoulder, she rubs the knife on her stomach.)
Phoebe: I feel really strongly about this, Rachel. Please, don't use this gift certificate. I'm asking you as a friend.
Monica: Do you see this? (Mimics him drooling over a womans breasts.)
Chandler: Oh, oh, a quality, good, because I was worried you guys were gonna be vague about this.
Ross: This is my wedding.
Joey: Wow. Hey look, if it helps, I dont want to feel this way. Honest. I just keep thinking, "Ah, Ill get over this." Yknow? I justIt just keeps gettin harder. I dont, I dont know what to do. Yknow? What do I do?
Phoebe: Check it out. Okay, I can play this when the guests are coming in. Okay. (Singing)
Joey: Oh wellHey-hey! Maybe, maybe uh, maybe this is a good thing. Yknow? Itll-itll give you a chance to shake things up, play different characters. Youre so talented.
Joey: Or maybe it's because this guy's doing so good they wanna put more people on it. (Chandler pours some juice in a glass.) You should see this guy, Chandler, he goes through two bottles a day.
Earl: Its just that I uh, have been working for ten years now at this meaningless, dead-end job and nobody here even knows I exist!
Rachel: What? Uhh, Phoebe, honey, honey, I know you're quirky and I get a big kick out of it, we all do actually, but if you destroy a coat like this that is like a crime against nature! Not nature, fashion!
Kate: And then right, right when the scene ends, he could take her with this raw, animal....
Mrs. Geller: (lying) Ive gotta call my friend Mary and tell her how good this is, from Monicas room.
MONICA: Oh, gosh, this is so weird. I mean, his whole life was in this apartment, and now it's gone. You know, I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments, for Mr. Heckles. I mean, he was kind of a pain, he was, but, he was a person. You're all going to hell.
Monica: You are both idiots. The joke is not funny, and its offensive to women, and doctors, and monkeys! You shouldnt be arguing over who gets credit, you should be arguing over who gets blamed for inflicting this horrible joke upon the world! Now let it go! The joke sucks!
Phoebe: Y'know, I dunno who this is, but it's not Debbie. (Hands back the pencil)
Rachel: Ross, I am trying to help her become a better person. This is a huge breakthrough for her! She just offered to do something for another human being!!
Rachel: Oh, this is great! I am gonna call him right now! (Jumps up.) Oh, thank you!
Ross: Okay, you are totally making this up.
Monica: (looking at her hand) Yknow what shoes would look great with this ring? Diamond shoes! (Sees Chandler sitting on the bed.) Youre not getting dressed. (Chandler quietly folds over the comforter on the bed making a spot for her.)
MNCA: Oh, isn't he? Oh, you know, I really think this time it may work with him. I mean, he just makes me feel so good and I've been feeling so lousy this last couple of months, no job, no boyfriend. Well, at least my cup is half full.
Phoebe: Oh, I thought this was your party and it turns out its a party for Howard. He's just the sweetest little man! (A guest walks up to her.)
Phoebe: (sees a little kid playing with a race car bed) (to kid) Hi. Y'know in England this car would be on the other side of the store. (the kid just stares at her, and she makes the that went right over your head motion) Woo!
Monica: You are insane! You-you gotta give this up!
Chandler: Did you see our bank statement? Can this be right?
Phoebe: Um-hmm. Oh wait! This is Bonnie. (who has hair by the way)
Joey: No, come on Ross! (He grabs his bag so he cant leave) Look, Ross, we have to get past this.
Rachel: Yeah, I know. I had the greatest day though, I got to sit in on the meeting with the reps from Calvin Klien. I told my boss I liked this line of lingerie, she ordered a ton of it. How was your day?
Rachel: Ooh, is this one of those things where you throw it in a bag with some graveyard dirt and hang it from a north-facing tree?
Paul: I wanted a big wheel. And instead my parents got me this little plastic chicken that you hop around on. It was embarrassing; kids made fun of me. That was a pretty tough year.
Chandler: Well, as old as he is in dog years, do you think Snoopy should still be allowed to fly this thing?
Chandler: (holding a tissue) And is this in case the house sneezes?
Danny: Okay, listen, I really like you. Okay? I think this can go somewhere. So what if I'm close to my family, are you gonna let that stand in the way of us?
Cecilia: All right Joey, I will help you. Not because I-I owe it to this stupid show, but because I owe it to Jessica.
Ross: Here we come, walkin' down thethis doesn't smell like Mom's.
Joey: Wha-a how about this: Another table leaves, right? But there�s still some food left on their place, okay, what�s the restaurant�s policy about people eatin� that?
Monica: Wow! Play that message for Emily and this whole problem goes away!
Rachel: Hey, yknow what? Youre the one who wants to make this big change and move in with Chandler! You should be the one to go! Why should I have to leave?!
PHOEBE: OK, is this really my father?
SUSAN: Ok, this could go on for a while.
Monica: Ok, thank you.(the man leaves) Uh, well this is it. Are you OK?
Phoebe: Because I was ashamed ok? I sold out for the cash! And then they give me benefits like medical, and dental, and a 401K. But you know... you pay a price. Now I'm this Corporate stooge and punching a clock and Ugh! paying taxes!
Steve (staring at Rachel): I - I just have to say this; you're really beautiful.
Monica: I know this is embarrassing, but nobody cares! No one here even knows you!
Rachel: Well okay, how about four hours in a freezing museum auditorium listening to Professor Pitstains and hes Hey everybody! Remember that thing thats been dead for a gazillion years. Well theres this little bone we didnt know it had!
Joey: Okay. Now this is just for tonight. Starting tomorrow, you gotta make a change. This has gone on long enough.
Phoebe: I can't believe this!
Rachel: No! I mean come on! This is a huge deal! (She sits next to him on the couch.) Fine I wantI need more details, who-who initiated the first kiss?
Rachel: Woow!I haven't seen you this worked up since you did that dog food commercial and you thought you were gonna be with a real talking dog!
Ross: And she just gave you this?
[This starts another series of flashbacks about Joeys hobbies. The first one is from Episode 703: The One With Phoebes Cookies, Rachel is teaching Joey how to sail his boat, the Mr. Bowmont.]
Joey: That, is not a cat! {I have to agree with Joey on this one.}
Housekeeper: This is the housekeeper speaking. And by the way, young lady, that is not how one addresses oneself on the telephone. First one identifies oneself and then asks for the person with whom one wishes to speak.
Monica: So great! He showed me where the restaurant's going to be. It's this, it's this cute little place on 10th Street. Not too big, not too small. Just right.
Phoebe: Okay y'know what you have to choose. All right, if-if the most important thing on the planet to you is this cat poopy thing then, okay you can have Smelly Cat, but we wont be partners. So whats it gonna be?
Ross: You gotta hear this story.
Monica: Seriously, what is this supposed to mean?
Jason: Y'know Phoebe, Im gonna make this real easy for you. (walks out)
Monica: Rachel, what's going on? I mean isn't this the same Barry who you left at the altar?
Joey: Relax. Here hold this (hands her his beer). This old stuff just comes right off. (he bends down to try and lift some tile right in the middle of the floor, in his tight pants.)
Monica: Ok. Great. I am so glad that you are here. We’re really excited about getting this process started.
Monica: Oh!! (hits Chandler and Joey in the head) You guys knew about this and you didnt tell us?!
Carl: Exactly! And you just know I'm gonna be the guy caught behind this hammerhead in traffic!
Phoebe: Oh, Greg and Jenny yuck! (Angrily) Hi Greg, Im Chandler this is Monica. Hi Monica, this is Jenny. Hi Jenny. Hi Greg.
Phoebe: (leaning to him) She said, "Hes obviously still in love with this Rachel girl." (He glares at her.)
Monica: As a joke, this customer at work who has a crush on me gave me a $20,000 tip. His number is on the check, he just did so Id call him.
Chandler: We dont have to come up with this now.
Chandler: Please let me stay on this side of the door.
Phoebe: Oh, I believe it. I think the baby can totally hear everything. I can show you. Look, this will seem a little weird, but you put your head inside this turkey, and then we'll all talk, and you'll hear everything we say.
Rachel: Oh yeah! Of course, I mean, shes gonna get over this, yknow? I mean, so you said my name! Yknow you just said it cause you saw me there, if youd have seen a circus freak, you wouldve said, "I take thee circus freak." Yknow, it didnt mean anything, its just a mistake. It didnt mean anything. Right?
Joey: Not if you're gonna be like this!
MONICA: Oh, why does this bother me so much? I mean I don't wanna be one of those people who tells their boyfriend they wanna spend 24 hours a day with them.
Joey: Is this movie gonna be my big break?
Ross: What, now youre not even taking to me? (moves over to the coffee table) Look Rachel, I-Im sorry, okay, Im sorry, I was out of my mind. I thought Id lost you, I didnt know what to do. Come on! Come on, how insane must I have been to do something like this? Huh? I-I dont cheat right, I, thats not me, Im not Joey!
Janice: Okay. All right. This is what we're gonna call it: 'Joey and Janice's DAY OF FUN!'
Lydia: No, this is a loaner.
Rachel: Well, I havent discussed it with him yet, but I know hes gonna be relieved. Last week, he brought this girl over and I started talking to her about morning sickness and then I showed her pictures from my pregnancy book.
Emily: Its not the pants. Its you that is backwards. And if, and if you dont understand how important this is to me, well then, perhaps we shouldnt get married at all! (She storms out.)
Rachel: You guys this cat is nothing like my grandmother's cat. I mean, it's not sweet, it's not cute, I even dragged that little string on the ground, and it just flipped out and scratched the hell out of me. And I swear, I know this sounds crazy, but every time this cat hisses at me I know it's saying, "Rachel!"
Mrs. Potter: Phoebe, we have rules here, this isnt that kind of place.
[Scene: The delivery room, Ross has returned with another doctor. This one, is well, younger.]
Emily: All right. I'll come to New York and we'll try and make this work.
Rachels Boss: Now Mr. Kaplan Sr. likes his coffee strong, so your gonna use two bags instead of one, see. Now pay attention, cause this parts tricky, see some people use filters just once.
Pete: So ah, there was this thing I wanted to talk to you about.
Ross: Can we, can we just forget this ever happened?
MONICA: Aren't you afraid that Joey's going to figure all of this out?� (pause)� I heard it.
Monica: This bottle opener. (She grabs it off of the freezer door.)
Monica: (on phone) Could you please tell me what this is in reference to? (Listens) Yes, hold on. (To Rachel) Um, they say there's been some unusual activity on your account.
Phoebe: This is so cool!
Chandler: OK, is there a mute button on this woman?
Ross: (Entering) What is this dive? Only you could've picked this place.