words in movies
Chandler: Gee if only she were one and had no idea what the hell a birthday was!
Rachel: You know Pheebs, when I was little, on my birthday, my daddy would hide a present in every room of the house, and then he would draw a treasure map to help me find 'em all.
Joey: Oh, yeah! How was I supposed to know?
Chandler: Oh, sure, she was probably up all night, excited about the party she knows is happening.
Judy: (to Monica) I remember your first birthday! Ross was jealous of all the attention we were giving you. He pulled on his testicles so hard! We had to take him to the emergency room! Ross: (pointing the camcorder at himself) There's something you didn't know about your dad!
Joey: Hey Pheebs, you know what? I was thinking... since you wrote a song, maybe I could do something for Emma using my talents! Phoebe: So you’re gonna... hit on her?
Rachel: (crying) Wow! That was amazing!
Chandler (nearly weeping): I was not ready for this today!
Ross (stops recording): Ok, cut! Great. That was... that was just... yeah!
Monica: Oh my God, that place has the creamiest frosting! I use to hitchhike there when I was a kid.
Ross: Hey Mon, that was really nice of you to loan Rachel your car so she could go and get the cake.
Chandler: Was that Emma? Is she up?
Jack: Last winter I went up on a church lawn and drove right through a manger scene. The papers thought it was a hate crime.
Judy: Anyway, it was lovely seeing you.
Joey: A monologue? I don't have.. (sees the book he was reading before for his "dramatic reading") I got it. (hangs up) (announces to the room) Aah! so... I'm gonna take off!
Monica: No! No, no... wait! We didn't lose. (turns to Chandler) The rules clearly stated that the last one to cross the finish line was the loser. Well, our dog never crossed the finish line, so technically...
Chandler: I was kidding.
Joey: What is wrong with me. It looked more delicious when it was a penis.
Rachel: Okay. (they both look into the camera, and Ross waves.) Hi Emma. Well, your first birthday is over, and it was really...
Ross: Nothing, ah there was this thing at the museum. Come on. (they go into her apartment) Easy.
Phoebe: So instead you told me Monica was pregnant.
Phoebe: I was in charge of cups.
Rachel: Well, not at first, but it was very intricate work and they said even though they lost their sight, it was all worth it.
Ross: Uh-huh. Well, when the psychiatrist told me I had to take a leave of absence because I yelled at my boss I started to get worked up again, so he offered me a tranquilizer. And I thought was a good idea so, I took it.
The Cute Guy: Wow! Uh, this is kind of embarrassing. I was actually coming over to talk to your friend.
Phoebe: (angered by the rubbing) Yes! I know! I know! Yeah! So the baby is totally craving meat. This afternoon I tried tricking it, I made it a soy-burger to make it think it was getting meat, yknow? And I got nauseous.
Chandler: Well that was before all the vaporizing action.
Phoebe: I know you didnt, I was talking about Monica.
Monica: Of course it was! Trust me, when it comes to psychology I know what I'm talking about. I took two psych classes in college.
Rachel: Oh and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic, although you missed a button.
Rachel: Umm that kiss before we left the apartment. That was some-something huh?
Ross: Funny, my birthday was seven months ago.
Chandler: HA-HA! All you got was Monica's stinky Brussels sprouts!
Monica: I am not 'so'! OK, I was a teensy bit weird at first, but... I'll be good. I promise.
Ross: Dad, before I was born, did you freak out at all?
RYAN: If I had one wish, it would be to build a time machine, go back to when I was 7, when Jimmy Hauser had the chicken pox. I would grab that kid and rub him all over my face.
Rachel: No! Yknow what? No! No! You thing was so stupid anyway, this was ridiculousWere gonna flip a coin! (Phoebe gasps.) All right?! (She flips the coin.) Heads! (Looks at the coin and grunts in disgust.)
Mindy: Oh God! You see, that's what I was afraid of!
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachels father. Look I I made a mistake, but its only because I really, really like you. Really!
Joey: Well, let me ask you something, was Kip a better roommate than me?
Ross: Yeah! And! And, it was the easiest 400 bucks Ive ever made.
Rachel: Oh you missed it. She was laughing. Oh it was amazing. It was amazing. It was the most beautiful, beautiful sound that...
Chandler: Hey, that was really good!
Rachel: Yeah, but that was different. Yknow? I mean, we were, we were going out then, now I think its weird.
Ross: No, no, that's not where I was going. Er, if you get in the... way, of us becoming a thing, then I would be, well, very sad.
Joey: That part was perfect for me! I can't believe I didn't get it!
Rachel: Okay! I was thinking if its a girl, how about Sandrine? Its French.
All: Oh! That was Lambchop!
Ross: This year was supposed to be great! But, it's only the second day and I'm a loser with stupid leather pants that don't even fit!
Joey: Uh, I dont know. Ya see, its just, see I was a regular on a soap opera yknow? And to go from that to this, I just Plus, Id have to wait on all my friends.
Chandler: I always thought having a heart attack was natures way of telling you to die! (Phoebe glares at him.) But youre not gonna die. I mean, you are going to die, but youre not gonna die today. I wish I was dead.
Monica: Michelle! Of course, it was Michelle! Did it sound like Michelle?
Eric: Well I was just so excited to see you.
Monica: Um, well, I was going to, I-I-I really was. But um, then somewhere, just out of nowhere, I didnt.
Joey: Apparently he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered all these people. You'd think you would've known that!
Chandler: Phebes, it was your birthday, like, months ago.
Ross: It was my first time.
Chandler: Well, this was great. Ill give you a call. We should do it again sometime. (Rachel is disappointed)
Ms. Geller: I understand, separation is hard. One time I was about to leave Ross to go to the beauty parlor and he got so upset, he took off all his clothes, tucked his ??? between his legs and cried out: �Mommy, I�m a girl, take me with you.�
Monica: Oh my God, I was thinking four.
Phoebe: Okay. There may be a way that we can get the other ring back. Cause I heard the guy tell the jeweler where he was going to propose. So maybe we can get him to trade rings or something.
Rachel: (interrupting) I bet he sensed that I was ready to have sex with another guy.
Chandler: No-no-no-no! That was the joke!
Joey: C'mon, you guys, it wasn't that bad. It was better than that thing I did with the trolls, at least you got to see my head.
Joey: (sees Rachel) Oh, uh, hey Rach. I uh, I was just coming over here to uh Oh wait, I dont have to lie to you, you dont live here anymore. Uh, Im eating their food. What are you doing?
Ross: Well uh, yknow what? Even if she doesnt know anything, I do! I have a son. And his mother and I didnt live together, and whenever he was with me I took care of him all the time, by myself.
Mrs. Burgin: Hello. Well, Joshua, that $500 was for groceries.
Janine: Well, I dont know tonight when they yelled cut and we didnt get to kiss, I was really, really, disappointed, and I just, really wanted to kiss you
Monica: Yes smokie, that is what it was. I just can�t get enough.
Joey: We, we come back from our walk and the- the phone was ringing...
Monica: Yeah but it was because I-I had an eye exam and I dont like my new eye doctor.
Rachel: (as Monica) And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school, I was a cow?
PHOEBE: Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll have something nice to say.
Monica: With good news? (very quickly and wringing hands) Of course it is not good news, you just said (deadpan) "Doctor Connelly just called". If it was good news you would have said (excitedly) "Doctor Connelly just called! " But so what is it? Is there a problem, uh? Is there a problem with me or with you?
Chandler: (entering, slowly) Yknow I was thinking, what if I uh, unpack here?
Ross: Was your basket on top?
Phoebe: Yes, when I first met you, you were like, "Blah, blah, blah." I was like, shhh!
Chandler: She did not have to tell me, I saw the play, and there was no heat. Back me up here, Ross!
Gunther: Oh, I was going to offer you my apartment.
Joey: Oh, it was a lot of fun right up until Chandler got a finger in the eye!
Chandler: Ooh! Ahh, Pheebs, was gonna tell a story.
Phoebe: (sees Rachel's face) What? Did you go to a costume party? Let me guess umm Pancho Vila? (Points at Rachel) and you're Bob Saget. (An old lady has sat down at the slot machine Phoebe was just at.)
Tom: Hi, you're Chandler Bing, right? I'm Tom Gordon, I was in your class.
Chandler: It's OK. It's OK. I was always rooting for you two kids to get together.
Joey: Sorry! Sorry, Im late; sorry, Im late! My duck and my chick and a fight, it-it was ugly.
Rachel: All right Monica, do you want to know why I was with Ross tonight?!
Joey: Sorry, that was wax.
Monica: Hey Frannie, welcome back! How was Florida?
Joey: Well, this-this-this was great. Didnt everybody have a great time?
Chandler: Hey Joe! I was just watching a movie-e-e (Notices that the TV is turned off.)
Melissa: anyway, his name is Allan and weve been going out for three years. He was my first client when I became a party planner. He was planning a party for his girlfriend at the time. Oh well. (Rachel and Phoebe politely laugh) And he was Theta Beta Pi at Syracuse.
Rachel: And the ring, was the size of my fist (makes a fist)!
Rachel: He was right there. He got down on one knee and proposed.
Chandler: Hey, y'know what you should do? You should take her back to the 1890's, when that phrase was last used.
Joey: Oh hey whoa-whoa, dont worry. Okay. When my sisters were pregnant they got every weird feeling in the book, it was always nothing.
Rachel: I dont care how long ago it was! You told people that I was half and half! Yknow what? I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you in high school.
Rachel: Oh, and then, we got into this big, stupid fight. I just, it was awful. I told him he treats me like a park ranger, or something, oh and then I told him I wanted to take a break, I dont want to take a break.
Big Nosed Rachel: Guess what?! All that stuff about Nancy Branson being a slut was all a rumor so Chip dumped her and he wants to come over to my house tonight!
Monica: It was a really beautiful service.
{Transcribers Note: There was no credits scene with this episode.}
Rachel: Oh, well maybe there was a dog lookin at him.
Ross: Joey had an imaginary childhood friend. His name was?
Joey: It wasnt my ring! Its Rosss ring! Thats why I felt so bad Rach, because he was going to propose.
Monica: Oh nothing Im justjust was yawning. (Mimics the groan from before and stretches.)
Monica: Because... I'm Monica Geller. It was my credit card you were using.
Monica: (Tiny laugh) I am really an idiot. (Tiny laugh) you see, I was filling out my friend's form, and instead of putting her information, (tiny laugh) I put mine.
RACH: Yeah, what're you saying, you just sort of put away feelings or whatever the hell it was you felt for me?
Ross: I was barefoot. Now tell me, the toilet thing is the only thing you taught him right?
Monica: We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this (she puts a box on the table and opens it). I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
Rachel: Yeah, well it was. I, I broke a cup.
Chandler: (to Kim and Nancy) Oh, hi! Excuse me, is uh Rachel Green here? I was supposed to meet her for lunch.
Ross: I dont know, I-I was all high.
Rachel: Now you're probably going to hire one of the people who did not ah, (She puts her hands on his desk blotter and he moves it. Rachel then doesn't know where to put her hands.) who did, who did not umm, yell at you and storm out, and I think that's a big mistake and here's why. I made a huge fool of myself and I came back, that shows courage. When I thought you wanted sex in exchange for this job, I said no. That shows integrity. And, I was not afraid to stand up for myself and that shows courage. (Suddenly realizes that she said courage twice.) Okay umm, now I know I already said courage, but y'know you gotta have courage. And umm, and finally when I thought you were making sexual advances in the workplace, I said no and I was not litigious. {By the way, litigious means to want to litigate and litigate is to make a lawsuit against. So she didn't want to sue him. Don't worry, I had to look it up too.} So there you go, you got, you got (counts them off with her fingers) courage, you got integrity, you got (Pause) courage again, and not litigious. Look Mr
Chandler: Im sorry. Im-Im-Im sorry that I said I was going to when Im not. Look, this has nothing to do with you, y'know? And this isnt Rachels fault. Its me. I have serious, serious problems when it comes to women. I have issues with commitment, intimacy, (pause) mascara goop. And Im really sorry, its just that this is not, this isnt going to work out.
Ross: All right, lets not jump to any conclusions. All right? There was some sexual chemistry between them.
Rachel: Well, he didnt say, but it was a fire. Im guessing not very good. Come on, we gotta go!
Gunther: Im sorry. Was I not supposed to?
Joey: See, there was kind of a mix up in my agent's office, but I'm still on TV and that's good exposure.
Monica: Oh no, was I cleaning in my sleep again?