words in movies
Phoebe: Yeah. Well, uhm... listen he was supposed to get a weekend furlough, so he'd come to the wedding tomorrow, but he just called and... uhm... well, apparently stabbing Iceman in the exercise yard just couldn't wait till Monday.
Phoebe: (her mobile phone rings) Oh, it's my wedding planner. She's driving me crazy! (she answers) Hello... Hey, ok, stop screaming! Ok? So, halibut. All right, so salmon, either way. I don't-I don't... it doesn't matter to me!
Phoebe: Ice sculpture? That sounds really fancy! I told you I just want a simple wedding.
Monica: I made her. (Phoebe looks shocked) Steel drums don't really say "elegant wedding". Nor does Marjorie's overwhelming scent.
[Scene: The wedding rehearsal dinner.]
Chandler: No stupid jokes. I thought that was for the actual wedding.
Chandler: (to Rachel) You know what I just realized? We have no idea what we're doing in the wedding tomorrow.
Rachel: Uhm... you haven't told these guys what they're doing in the wedding yet.
Phoebe: Uhm... well, they're not in the wedding.
Ross: I can't believe we're gonna be the only people that aren't in this wedding.
Ross: And it's a wedding! It'd be weird if I'm not in it...
[Scene: Wedding rehearsal dinner. Joey and Mike are talking.]
Chandler: Mike didn't tell you? You have to chose one of us to be in your wedding. One of his groomsmen fell out.
Chandler: Just not enough to put us in the original wedding party.
Phoebe: And... moment's over! (Rachel, Joey and Chandler all turn and look disapprovingly towards Monica but she just shrugs it off) So, ok, uh, I can forget that. I can forget that and uhm... (she's flipping cards skipping half of them) Oh this is funny! Oh, but you need to know that to... that, to... Oh, ok, well, uhm, I (Monica is miming CUT). Ok, ok, I, ok, I.... MONICA I CAN'T DO IT LIKE THIS! THIS IS MY WEDDING! OKAY, I DON'T WANT THIS (she mimes Monica's when she was twirling her hands) OR THIS (she taps her watch) OR THIS (she mimes CUT) OK? I JUST WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING! WHERE MY FIANCEE CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM ANYTIME HE WANTS! (pause) You know what? You're done.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey's having breakfast; Phoebe enters the room carrying her wedding dress.]
Rachel: Happy wedding day!
Phoebe: Oh, happy my wedding day to you!
Chandler: Let me tell you why you need to pick me. (Goes to sit on the couch facing backwards to the kitchen. Rachel gets a chair and sits opposite him) See, when I was a kid, I was always left out of everything, you know, and it really made me feel... insecure. You know, I was always picked last in gym. Even behind that big fat exchange student who didn't even know the rules to baseball. I mean, this guy would strike out and then run to third. Anyway, If I'm the only one left out of this wedding, I just know that all those feelings are gonna come rushing back.
Mike: Yes. Yeah and thanks for all the wedding night advice. (walks away) That didn't make me uncomfortable at all! Alright, so I'll see everybody tonight?
Ross: (smiling to himself) Good. I'm just getting some coffee. So I'm alert for the wedding.
Chandler: You told us both we could be in the wedding? (they both stare at Rachel)
Chandler: I'll tell you at the wedding.
Ross: (to Rachel) Haha! Looks like you're not going to be in the wedding either. (Looks at Phoebe) So sorry Pheebs.
Rachel: Well, look, it's hardly snowing anymore. I mean you couldn't ask for a more romantic setting. This could be the simple wedding you've always wanted!
Chandler: So technically, would this person be in the wedding?
Ross: (takes Chappy from Mike) Well, I guess I'm in the wedding then. Ha haaa... (smells Chappy) He stinks!
Joey: Oh hey, don't worry. I'm still ordained from your wedding.
(She takes off the coat she was wearing over her wedding dress, which is violet and has a darker shade petticoat underneath which shows at one side where the dress is lifted up to about the height of her hip and connected to the petticoat. She's wearing a veil over her curly hair and a low cut top with straps only just hanging over her shoulders.)
(Mike takes off his coat to give to Phoebe and the steel band plays "The Wedding Song")
Chandler: That really was an incredible wedding.
Joey: So uh, hey, that uh, that wedding ring, huh? Man, thats nice!
Monica: Honey, as we get closer to the wedding, is there anything that you would like to talk about or share?
Monica: (grabs the guitar away from her) No, Phoebe, Ill tell you what, if you get ready now Ill let you play it at the wedding.
Mr. Geller: This bill for my half of the wedding. its insane.
(Ross and Emilys parents are seated at a table. Ross is between them and they are discussing the wedding bill.)
Rachel: (laughs) Yknow when I locked myself in the bathroom at my wedding, it was because I was trying to pop the window out of the frame.
Rachel: Whats this? Is this Rosss wedding invitation?
Ross: Yes. Yes. Dont worry. Everythings fine. Well uh, well see you tomorrow at the wedding.
Mr. Geller: (Looking at ht wedding bill.) What the hell!!!
RACHEL: I had a wedding.
The Director: Joey, you gotta stay until the end. We cant stop filming just for you. Its not like its your wedding. (Starts to walk away.)
Monica: Honey, umm I-I love you, (laughs) but umm, if you call our wedding a party one more time, you may not get invited. Okay? (Laughs) Listen, we could always earn more money, okay? But uh, were only gonna get married once.
The Museum Official: (on machine) I want to let her know that there was a cancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, it is available
Rachel: Yeah! Y'know, ever since I ran out on Barry at the wedding, I have wondered whether I made the right choice. And now I know.
The Museum Official: (on phone) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller. I want to let her know that there was a cancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, it is available (Chandler runs to answer the phone.)
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
Phoebe: Hey! Hey, did you get your invitation to Rosss wedding?
Rachel: Oh, I forgot this was in here. Umm, this was the uh garter that I was saving for my wedding and I wanted it to be Monicas something borrowed and its blue. (Starts to cry again.) Yeah
Ross: Wheres my ring? My dead grandmothers wedding ring? Where is it? Where is it?
Dr. Green: (laughs) Poppy. (To Phoebe) Oh, Im gonna be a poppy. (Stops laughing) So when is the wedding?
Ross: This is my wedding.
Monica: That was that girl Megan! She booked the Swing Kings on the day of our wedding and said that I couldnt have them back unless I gave her the dress!
Monica: The wedding is off, sloppy and immature!
Monica: Come on! So she comes to the wedding! I mean it wont be so bad.
Monica: Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, what was I supposed to do?!
Monica: What happened? You still have the Monica wedding fund dont you?
Phoebe: It’s ok, it’s ok. I made my decision. What I really want is a great big wedding (she covers her mouth)
Monica: (taking Rachels hand) Sweetie okay. Its okay. Everybody made it to the wedding. Im fine.
Phoebe: Look, I can't have a wedding with this money now. It's tainted.
David: Why not? It's brilliant! (talking to an imaginary Mike) Goodbye Mike, we'll see you at the wedding, fella! (pause) well, we probably won't invite you to the wedding... (to Chandler) Thank you, Chandler. Sincerely.
ROSS: Well then that's it. And if George and Adelaide can't accept that, then the hell with them. Look, if my parents didn't want me to marry you, no way that would have stopped me. Look, this is your wedding. Do it.
[There was no closing scene, only a preview of the wedding.]
Chandler: So did Monica tell you about this great band called the Swing Kings that were trying to get to play at the wedding?
(Another woman walks past Rachel carrying a wedding dress.)
[And with that we go into the save the budget portion of the show, which features flashbacks from previous episodes. The first set of auditions feature high lights or low lights of Joeys acting career. The first flashback is from The One With The Lesbian Wedding.]
Chandler: (interrupting her just in time) Hey! Heres a dollar, consider it a deposit. Please sing at our wedding.
Joey: Yeah! If you wanna sing at their wedding, well you sing at their wedding!
Monica: I cant believe it! That there is no money for my wedding?!
Megan: We met with him. Did he show you the photos of the nude wedding he did?
Joey: (holding a box) Well, remember when they got in that big fight and broke up and we were all stuck in her with no food or anything? Well, when Ross said Rachel at the wedding, I figured it was gonna happen again, so I hid this in here.
"First time I met Chandler, I thought he was gay. But here I am singing on his wedding day!"
Ross: My-my ring? My-my wedding ring? The-the stripper stole my wedding ring?! H-how?! How could this all happen?!
ROSS: So don't, I don't see why we have to go to this thing anyway, it's your ex-fiancee's wedding.
Charity guy: Please, take the check, go have a great wedding and a wonderful life together.
Aunt Lisa: Congratulations on the baby, and on the wedding
ROSS: Why wouldn't I want to come? I had fun at the first wedding.
Phoebe: Oh, have a great wedding!
Monica: Oh sweetie, you can never embarrass me. (Chandler grunts.) Okay, you can easily embarrass me. But come on, it doesnt matter. All right? I married you! So I want to dance on my wedding night with my husband. Come on. (They go onto the floor.) Just try not to move your feet at all. (Chandler starts to get into the groove and bust a move.) There you go.
(Monica enters wearing her wedding dress.)
Rachel: Yeah, so lets get started on the wedding plans!
Monica: (laughs) Yknow what? I-I dont want a big, fancy wedding.
Mike: Well, hey, at least you're getting a proper wedding. I mean, you really deserve that.
Ross: Cousin Frannies wedding, its tomorrow night.
The Wedding Guest: Hi!
Monica: No, Im wearing a wedding dress.
Eric: Well, I guess Ill see you at the wedding. (Exits and Phoebe follows him into the hall.)
Aunt Millie: Isnt it a beautiful wedding?!
Chandler: Oh you got a wedding dress? Thats great!
The Museum Official: (to the couple) You can put the aisle over here (points), and put the wedding ceremony right over here. (Points.)
Chandler: Yknow Im-Im really glad we decided not to sleep together before the wedding.
Phoebe: You guys kissed!!!!! What does this mean?!! Are you, are you getting back together?! Can I sing at your wedding?
Rachel: Yeah, I went to a wedding once where they had swing music and uh, two months later the couple got divorced. And now Im not saying that theres any connection here yknow, but they did tell me thats why they got divorced.
Monica: Oh how nice. Maybe later we can all go blow our noses on my wedding dress.
Chandler: The wedding pictures?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is entering and Mona from the wedding recognizes him.]
Phoebe: Okay, I can fix this! Okay Monica, Rachel thinks all you can talk about is the wedding. (Rachel glares at her.)
Monica: Shrill?! The wedding is back on!
Monica: (entering from her room, excitedly) Im getting married today!!! (She trips and falls.) (Getting up) I think I just cracked a rib. But I dont care because todays my wedding day! My day is finally here!! (Runs back into her room.)
[Scene: The Wedding Hall, Monica and Chandler have just said "I do," and the photographer is taking the required pictures. First of Monica, Chandler, Ross and Joey.]
Monica: The wedding starts at six.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are admiring Monicas wedding dress.]
WEDDING PLANNER: All rightie, everybody look at me. Good. All right, its time. Bridesmaids and ushers let's see two lines, thank you.
Woman At The Wedding: Why wont you take our picture?
Anxious Wedding Guest: Yes! Green-blue!
Woman At The Wedding: It didnt click.
Man At The Wedding: Uh, would you take one of us?
Chandler: Umm, so this Aunt Marilyn is-is-is-is she coming to the wedding?
Phoebe: Wait you stole those from these peoples wedding?
Anxious Wedding Guest: Yes!
Chandler: Oh, shes got you running errands, yknow, picking up wedding dresses (Laughs and makes like Indiana Jones and his whip) Wah-pah!
Phoebe: It’s for our wedding day! Right, now, is this guy gay or straight, because one of us gonna have to start flirting.
Anxious Wedding Guest: Yes!
Joey: That hot girl from their wedding?
Rachel: I know. I always thought if you and I got married, it would be the one that stuck. And it wouldnt be a secret, and we wouldnt have our wedding dinner at Pizza Hut. (They both laugh.)
Monica: I kind of have to don't I? Because of this stupid thing (Points to her wedding ring.)
Joey: What?! He got to do it at your first wedding!
Joey: Okay, the next situation is for Rachel. The wedding is about to start you walk into the back room and you find Monica taking a nap with Ross. (Ross lies on the floor.) Ill be Monica. Go! (He jumps down and cuddles up with Ross.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is looking at the wedding book as Monica enters.]
Ross: Well yeah, but she doesnt know that. I mean, the last time she saw you-you wouldve turned one of those little wedding chairs into kindling.
Man At The Wedding: Uh, your finger was covering the lens.
Rachel: Oh! Oh, I just thought of the greatest wedding gift to get you.
Ross: Im telling you, this looks exactly like your wedding! Arent these the same flowers?
Woman: And also, congratulations on your wedding.
Ross: (Stepping in between them.)Okay! Okay! Thats it!! Parents!! Parents!! Back away!! All right, this is our wedding day! From now on everyone gets along, and if I hear one more word. NO GRANDCHILDREN! (Pointing at his mother.) Thats right!!
Megan: I know! I almost called off my wedding. Oh, whos your band?!
Mrs. Geller: Youre not going to say anything? On our 35th wedding anniversary
Mrs. Geller: Oh, well Richard raved about the food at his party, of course you were sleeping with him. Then I heard the food at that lesbian wedding was very nice, I assume you werent sleeping with anybody there. Though, at least that would be something. (Leaves)
Chandler: Get ready to run. (Chandler walks over to the new bride.) Congratulations on your wedding. (He grabs her, kisses her, Ross takes the picture, and they both run out.)
Mr. Bing: But that was after the wedding, its not bad luck then.
CHANDLER: Well now you understand how I feel every single day, ok? The world is my lesbian wedding.