words in movies
Joey: (impressed) Wow, that was great! You really wrote that?
Monica: It's so unfair, you don't even like your job!
Monica: It's just... It's hard enough not seeing you during the week, but for Christmas... alright, if this is what you have to do, I understand.
Chandler: Thanks. (they kiss) I'll see you New Year's Day.
Chandler: All right everybody, I know that it's Christmas Eve and you'd rather be with your families, but there's *no* call (he takes it off) for writing "Screw you, Mr. Bing!" on the back of my chair! (he looks at it) -- By the way, you can all call me Chandler.
Chandler: Hey. Where've you been?
Chandler: (to the others) You hear that? You may not be with your families, but at least it's gonna smell like ham in here.
Chandler: Y'know what, I know what will cheer you guys up! (he starts spreading envelopes among them) I had a little talk with the boys in New York, told 'em about all the hard work you've been doing and that a little Christmas bonus may be in order.
Chandler: Well, that's like money in your pocket! - Alright look, you want me to say it? This sucks. Being here sucks! This work sucks!
Chandler: I'm sorry. Hey, at least you guys get to go home and be with your families tonight. I have to go back to an empty hotel room and lay down on a very questionable bedspread. And then tomorrow morning, you get to have Christmas morning in your own houses, wich, by the way, none of you have invited me to.
Ken: You can come to my house!
Wendy: So, if you were home right now, what would you be doing?
Chandler: Typical Christmas-y stuff, you know? Our holidays are pretty traditional...
"Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap. Asked him to bring my friends all kinds of crap. Said all you need is to write them a song. Now, you haven't heard it yet, so don't try to sing along. No, don't sing along.
Rachel: Okay, Pheebs, you look in the kitchen, I will look in the back closet.
Chandler: I can save you time ladies, I'm right here.
Phoebe: Yeah, Chandler why don't you take a walk? This doesn't concern you.
Chandler: No not okay, you can't look for Monica's presents!
Chandler: No, you don't have to, and you can't because I, I live here too.
Phoebe: Well then, you should look with us.
Rachel: Chandler, aren't you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
Rachel: Chandler, that's not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And you've just gotten her one great present? I mean that's just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
Rachel: (Reading from a tag that's attached to the shoe) "Dear losers, do you really think I'd hide presents under the couch? P.S.: Chandler, I knew they'd break you."
Joey: Rach, these are for you.
Joey: No, but with this new car smell, you'll think you do.
Phoebe: Ahh, toilet seat covers! Is that what you were doing while I was getting gas?
Phoebe: You guuuyys.
Ross: You got me a cola drink?
Ross: Well this, this is too much, I feel like I should get you another sweater.
Ross: Ooh, hey Ben, what if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the Festival of Lights?
Ross: What are you doing here, Santa?
Chandler: Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here, weird...turtle-man?
Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
Monica: Okay Ben, why don't you come open some more presents, and Santa, the Armadillo and I have a little talk in the kitchen? There's a sentence I'd never thought I'd say.
Ross: (to Chandler) What are you doing?
Chandler: You called everyone and said you were having trouble finding a Santa costume, so I borrowed one from a guy at work!
Ross: Thank you, but, but you, you gotta leave.
Monica: (to Chandler) Hey, you think, you can keep it another night? (She has a really teasing look on her face and keeps twirling Chandler's beard.)
Chandler: You know what, everybody? Go home. You should be with your families. It's bad enough that we're working New Year's Eve.
Wendy: Naah... I couldn't leave you alone.
Monica: Hi Honey! We're all here; we just want to wish you a Merry Christmas.
Chandler: Ahh, Merry Christmas; I miss you guys!
Chandler: It is. Did I... not tell you about her?
Monica: Umhmm, umhmm, about the time you told me about New Year's Eve. Where is everybody else?
Monica: Ohh, you are such a good boss! Is she pretty?
Chandler: I don't think of her that way, you know, she's a, she's a colleague.
Monica: Alright, well, maybe I should let you and the second prettiest girl in Oklahoma get back to work.
Chandler: Merry Christmas, you guys!
Chandler: Ah well, she's got this weird idea, that, uh, y'know, just because you and I are alone, that something is gonna happen.
Wendy: You are to me... (She gets closer again, putting her arms around his torso.)
Chandler: Well look, it's not easy to spend this much time apart, you know. She's entitled to be a little paranoid... or, in this case: right on money! ... You know, she's amazing, and beautiful, and smart, and if she were here right now, ...she'd kick your ass. Look, you're a really nice person... ham stealing and adultery aside. But, what I have with my wife is pretty great, so nothing is ever gonna happen between us.
Wendy: Okay, let me ask you something: if what you and your wife have is so great, then why are you spending Christmas with me?
Chandler: I mean, you were the most beautiful woman in the room tonight!
Chandler: You kidding? You're the most beautiful woman in most rooms... (She jumps up and kisses him.) (Breaking the kiss.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What's going on? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
Chandler: How drunk are you?
Monica: Drunk enough that I know I wanna do this. Not so drunk that you should feel guilty about taking advantage.
Chandler: Well, I have kissed over four women. (They kiss again.) Do you wanna get under the covers?
Monica: Wow! You are really fast!
Chandler: It bodes well for me that speed impresses you.
Monica: Do you wanna do it at the same time?
Chandler: So, are you really gonna go out with that nurse man?
Monica: Well uh, you and I are just goofing around, I thought, why not just goof around with him.
Chandler: Y'know, I don't know if you've ever looked up the term goofing around in the dictionary... Well, I have, and the technical definition is, two friends who care a lot about each other and have amazing sex and just wanna spend more time together. But if you have this new fangled dictionary that gets you made at me, then we have to, y'know, get you my original dictionary. I am *so* bad at this.
Monica: I think you're better than you think you are.
Monica: You're so efficient. I love you!
Monica: Listen umm, I've been thinking, it's not fair for me to ask you to spend all of your money on our wedding. I mean, you work, you work really hard for that.
Monica: Eh, you work for that.
Monica: You do?!
Chandler: Yeah, I'm putting my foot down. Yeah look, when I proposed I told you that I would do anything to make you happy, and if having the perfect wedding makes you happy, then, then that's what we're gonna do.
Monica: You thought about that?
Monica: What else did you think about?
Chandler: Sure you do.
Monica: No, I want everything that you just said. I want a marriage.
Chandler: You sure?
Chandler: I love you so much.
Monica: I love you. (They kiss.)
Phoebe: (at the window) Hey look, you guys, it's snowing!
Monica: Okay, fine. Let's talk about snow. -- Do you think it's snowing in Tulsa, where my husband is having sex on a copying machine?
Monica: What are you doing here?
Chandler: I wanted to be with you. I missed you so much.
Joey: Hey, hey, uh, who did you miss the most?
Chandler: I never want to leave you again!
Monica: But I thought if you left, you get fired.
Ross: What, you, you really quit your job?
Chandler: Yeah! It's a stupid job, and I could not stand leaving you. And why should I be the only one who doesn't get to do what he *really* wants to do?
Rachel: What do you really want to do?
Chandler: I know, I, I should have talked to you first about it.
Monica: No, I think that this is what you wanna do, I think it's great!
Phoebe: (to Chandler) Thank you.
Ross: (reading off his card) "A donation has been made in your name to the New York City Ballet." -- How did you know?
Rachel: Wha... are you kidding? I can't return this.
Chandler: I... thought it was a timely start to thinking about other people. Besides, this gift still says I love you guys.
Chandler: Actuary... no. Book-keeper... no. Topless dancer... (he looks down on himself, checking, then nods satisfied and marks the offer with a pen) (to Monica:) Hey, d'you know what I just realized? You are the sole wage earner. *You* are the head of the household. I don't do anything - I'm a kept man!
Monica: You are! (she picks up a bill from the table, handing it to Chandler) Hey, here's twenty bucks. -- Why don't you go buy yourself something pretty while I'm at work tomorrow?
Phoebe: Well, I think I broke it. But thats all right, heres the number you can call.
Joey: (seeing what theyre doing) What do you got there?
Chandler: (annoyed) Do you know why?
Ross: Yeah, you didnt get one.
Chandler: Wow, y'know when you say it, it doesn't sound so scary.
Rachel: What a jerk! You want me to kick his ass?
Phoebe: You know, if you tilt your head to the left, and relax your eyes, it kinda looks like an old potato.
Joey: Bikini, French cut, thong! And-and the fabrics! Youve got cotton, silk, lace! And yknow what Ive always wondered about?
Phoebe: Okay. Okay. IOkay umm this I-I sent my friend Joey in here to find out stuff about you. Umm yknow, if it helps you came off great. A lot better than Im coming off right now.
Director: (To Joey) Okay, youre dancing with that girl over there.
Rachel: Oh what do you know? Virgin!
Ross: Yeah, yeah you have the ring?
CHAN: I'm telling you this thing won't print. Yes, I pressed that button like 100 times. You know, for a hot line you are not so hot. What? What is that in the background? Are you watching Star Trek?
Phoebe: Okay, so what do you guys really think of Chandler?
Janine: Well, if thats what you want. Ill just put it all in my room.
Rachel: Well, if you see him, will you please tell him that Im looking for him and that this I am not gonna throw up!
Phoebe: You were great. But they still made fun of you.
Joey: Come on man theres gotta be something that gets you choked up! Like uh, uh oh, what if you saw a three-legged puppy?
Bitsy: Oh, please darling, let's be honest. You can have all the... sailor fun you want with that one, but... let's be real...
Joey: Oh uh, can I give you a hand?
Chandler: You still can't stand her can you?
Monica: You cant say that!! You-you dont know!! I mean I thought I was gonna pass out from the pain! Anyway I-I tried, but I-I couldnt...bend that way. So... (looks at Joey.)
Emily: Oh, blimey, I still cant believe youve got an earring!
The Casting Director: So uh well the director is insisting that whoever play that part be authentically, anatomically not Jewish. Do you know what Im saying?
Ross: Look, Mon, do you want us to uh, come back later?
Chandler: Look, Im telling you this is just like my parents divorce, which is when I started smoking in the first place.
Rachel: Wait, what do you mean youre getting a new brain?
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Look!
Ross: So, what do you want to do tonight? Theres a Ukrainian film at the Angelica thats supposed to be very powerful. Interested?
Phoebe: You guys, why didnt you tell me you were eloping?
Rachel: What are you doing?
Monica: Are you okay?
Chandler: Well maybe you dont have to tell him anything.
Joey: All right look, Ross, hes right. Emilys great, shes great! But this way too soon, youre only gonna scare her!
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: (laughs) Are you sure youre okay?
Monica: (hums for a while, then gives up, and in her head) If it bothers you that much, just go out and get the shoes. No. Don't do this. This is stupid! I don't have to prove anything, I'm gonna go get them...But then everyone will know. Unless I get them, and then wake up really early and put them back! ...I need help! (She buries her head in her pillow.)
MR, GELLER: Wait, how do you zoom out? [zooms out and we see an extremely overweight Monica eating a big sandwich] There she is.
Monica: Yeah, well I dont think it really counts if you have to read them off the back of your hand after you fall asleep on the couch.
Chandler: Okay look, don't...don't be mad okay? But after I unpacked the boxes I wanted to do something nice for you, so, I-I-I cleaned the apartment. So I moved everything around and then I forgot where it, where it went back and I'm sorry, I'm very sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Chandler: Love her! That's right, I LOVE HER!!! I love her!! (They walk together and hug.) I love you, Monica.
Phoebe: Please, I think you know why.
Chandler: Yes! Im fine. In fact Ive been fine for a long time now and I think, the reason is you.
Monica: Hey, its good to see you!
Monica: (to Richard) Its good to see you
Rachel: You think I trust you with it?! No! Were gonna split it! You take half and I take half!
Richard: Oh. Good to see you guys.
Joey: Estelle, you gotta get me some work. I-I lost my health insurance.
Rachel: (on tape) Oh, I remember how we almost. Do you think we wouldve gone through with it? Yknow, if we hadnt gotten caught. Do you think we wouldve done it?
Monica: Why would you do that?
Phoebe: I had to bring them! We killed their mother, they're our responsibility now. You know, they require constant care. You should know that, Rachel, you're a mother.
Rachel: Well, now, how come you guys have never played poker with us?
Chandler: Thank you! Today, my boss keep slapping my butt and he was acting like it was no big deal.
Joey: Ow, I'm just going over the script now! You wanna read lines with me?
Monica: Rachel, if you want the little round waffles, you gotta have to wait until I find the little waffle iron.
Rachel: (seeing the ring and gasping) Oh my God, they let you keep that stuff?!
Joshua: Anyway, hopefully, Ill see you around sometime. (He goes out the door.)
Chandler: Nothing happened? Nothing? So you didnt tell my girlfriend that you love her?
Joey: Well, given that he's desperately in love with you, he probably wouldn't mind getting a cup of coffee or something.
Mr. Heckles: (to Eric) Who are you?
Chandler: Oh you knew that. Good!
MR. GELLER: You know, that Steffi Graf has quite a tush. I'm just saying, it's right there.
Rachel: (shakes her head) I guess... Oh, I just had such an idea of what this day would be like, you know? Emma laughing and everybody gathered around her cake singing "Happy Birthday". Then we would all go into... HEY GET OUT OF THE ROAD YOU STUPID STUDENT DRIVER!!! (honks furiously, and Ross looks at her in disbelief and Rachel looks at him.) They have to learn!
Joey: I wish. See, I guess another thing I probably shouldve told you about Ginger is that she kinda has a ah, artificial leg.
Joey: Ross, you dont have to yell.
Chandler: (To Monica) You are beautiful.
Chandler: No, you shNo you said you made that up!!
Ross: (hitting Monica with his suitcase) (to Charlie) We should probably get going, you know, we got a lot of ground to cover.
Ross: Oh, yeah, last week you had a wonderful, nutty, chocolatey kind of a cakey pie thing. (Rachel gives him a dirty look) Nothing, just, just, I'm fine.
Joey: All right, look Im sorry you guys, but its just that I gotta get these new head shots made. And theyre really expensive, yknow? Im down to like three! Well, actually two cause one of em I kinda blackened in some teethWhy did I do that?! (Hits himself in the head.)
Joey: Are you kidding me?! Shes gonna this boat!
Rachel: But Joey you dont have $20,000!
Frannie: Oh, I hate you, I'm pushing my Aunt Roz through Parrot Jungle and you're having sex! So? Who?
Amanda: Oh! Gosh! This is brilliant. Gosh, it's just like old times. I'm so happy you two are friends again!
Chandler: Luckily, the guy she settled for cant hear what youre talking about.
Ross: So, I'm guessing you had an extra ticket and couldn't decide which one of you got to bring a date?
Phoebe: Should I not have told you?
Phoebe: Oh, oh, but y'know, you always see these really beautiful women with these really nothing guys, you could be one of those guys.
Ross: I'm hurt! I'm actually hurt, that you would think that I would send you any of those things out of any thing other than love. Hurt! Hurt!
Kathy: Um, thank you for the gift.
Woman: No! Its where you put the dirty ones!
Dr. Long: Congratulations. Ill give you two a minute.
The Fan: Are you Phoebe Buffay?
Monica: What are you up too?
Chandler: I don't know. I can't--I just, I can't get her out of my head. Y'know? I mean, I'm a very bad person. I'm a very, very bad person. I'm a horrible person. (he waits for a reaction, when he doesn't get one) No you're not Chandler! We still love you Chandler!
Chandler: Now, that's a lot harder than it sounds. You always forget at least one, or in some cases... fourteen (looks over to Monica).
Elizabeth: You suck!!
Phoebe: Oh God, Im so glad you guys are happy, I was so afraid you were going to be all freaked.
SUSIE: Well um, why don't you call me in 20 years and tell me if you're still upset about this. [she leaves with his clothes]
Monica: What uhWhat did youWhat?!
Joey: (to Ross) Just get in there and make a face to face apology, you know? Look them in the eye. I know I can get them to forgive us.
Richard: You are?
Phoebe Sr.: You do?! Wait, I like umm, the Beetles.
Joey: Hey uh, have you guys scene Chandler?
Chandler: So how are you doing?
Mr. Thompson: Nice to see you Rachel.
Steve: I'm not funny either. So, if you were thinking, "well, he's not that good-looking, but maybe we'll have some laughs"... That ain't gonna happen.
Rachel: No! You gotta hold my hand!!
Ross: Hey, if there is ever, anything I can do for you...
Ross: Okay, okay, Im sorry, it will never happen... (closes eyes) Uh-oh! Wait a minute! Wait-wait, now there are a hundred of you and Im the king.