words in movies
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe, are you still on hold? I was supposed to call my Dad back like two hours ago.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, he clipped on, he said call him as soon as you get a chance, hes at Flimbys.
Joey: Two it is. Ross, how about you?
Joey: But you said one.
Joey: Okay. (to Phoebe and Chandler) Did ah, you guys mean you plus one?
Ross: All right, Ill see you tonight.
Joey: Oh, hey, you guys are finally gonna get to meet Kate!
Monica: Joey, what are you doing?! Its never gonna happen, shes seeing somebody.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Here you go. You can wear this. (hands her a sweater)
Monica: Okay, wait, you gotta hang up cause were gonna be late.
Hold Voice: Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
Phoebe: Yes!! Yes!! Im the next caller! You were gonna have me hang up.
Chandler: (entering, carrying the chick and duck) Hey! Can you take a duck and a chick to the theatre?
Rachel: How are you? (She goes to kiss him on the cheek, but stops because of the dates and pats him on the shoulder.)
Cailin: Ill join you.
Ross: Oh! Well then this is awkward. So what do you uh
Ross: Okay. (sees two people sitting in their seats.) Uh, huh. Excuse me, Im sorry, I-I think you may be in our seats.
Tommy: Oh, you thought, huh? Yeah, well that didnt really work out too well for you did it you idiot!! What are you?! A moron!! Huh?! It says D-13! Okay?! Look youre surrounded by even numbers!! Did that give you some clue?!
Tommy: Oh! Oh! The usher must be right! What, with all that training they go through! Get out!! (They start to leave.) Here! (He throws him back his ticket.) (to Ross, calmly) Hey man, you want the aisle?
Joey: (sees Kate) Oh-oh, hey-hey, Kate! Listen I want you to meet everybody. Everybody, this is Kate.
Chandler: So thats the girl you like.
Ross: (drags Chandler over to buffet table) Im telling you, this guy Rachel is with is crazy! Okay? He viscously screamed at total strangers! I think hes baaad news!
Chandler: Wait a minute, wait a minute, you dont like the guy Rachels dating? Well, thats odd.
Joey: Oh, hey, Lauren. Uh, you guys this is, this is Kates understudy, Lauren.
Rachel: Hey. Gosh, you look soo familiar.
Lauren: Oh, yeah! I-I ran into you in the hallway in your building. It was right after I slept with Joey. He dumped me the next day.
Cailin: So. Howd you guys meet?
Estelle: Joey, sweetheart, you were fabulous!
Joey: Hey you guys, this is my agent, Estelle.
Estelle: How do you do. (to Rachel and Monica) Ooh, you two girls were outstanding! (to Joey) Did they have representation?
The Director: Kate Millers awkward and mannered portrayal is laughable. (Kate walks away depressed.) Badda-badda-badda. Ah-ha! Here it is! The direction by Marshal Talmant is (stops, reads it again, and throws down the paper in disgust) Thank you, boys and girls, youve ruined my life. Please, stuff your talentless faces with my Mothers crab cakes! (starts to leave) Excuse me!!
Monica: Yeah. Where were you?
Hold Voice: Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
Monica: You were the next caller five hours ago. You must be going crazy.
Joey: Hey! Are you okay?
Joey: Listen, drama critics theyre nothing but, but people who couldnt make it as actors. You know what you should do?
Joey: Uh, de-clawing cats. Hey, tell ya what. Let me walk you home. Well stop by every news stand and burn every copy of their Times and the Post.
Joey: Oh, you didnt see the Post?
Kate: No. You?
Kate: (drunk) So you really think those newspapers are just jealous of me?
Joey: Oh, absolutely! Youre talented and youre good looking.
Kate: Oh, youre sweet and cute.
Joey: I, I dont get you. I mean first, you hate me. Then you sleep with me. Then you want nothing to do with me, now you want me again.
Kate: What? So you never went out with an actress before?
Joey: Kate, do you even like me?
Joey: Well so, how come you blew me off? Y'know? How come you were with him?
Kate: I dont know! I just, just do this! I-I always have to pick the like the smartest guy, or-or the most talented guy Why cant I just pick someone like you?
Kate: You know what I mean. I mean like the sweetest guy. Joey, youre just so, youre so, so (She passes out and slumps against his shoulder.)
Joey: (Checks to see if shes drooling on his shirt.) Okay. Okay, okay, hey. (Lays her down and covers her with a blanket.) There we go, lets get your feet up there. (Looks at her) Good night, Kate. Sweet dreams. (Picks up a garbage can) Im gonna put this can right here in case you have to hurl.
Hold Voice: Please stay on the line. Youre call is very important to us.
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) Pheebs, youve been up for 24 hours! Go to sleep, honey. Th-this isnt healthy.
Monica: Hey! Didnt you have that outfit on last night?
Phoebe: Im so, so, so sorry, Joey. I definitely am gonna see youre play. I swear youre play is very important to us, thank you for your patience. Youre play is the next play is the next play Im gonna see.
Monica: Joey, you had the night!
Monica: Did you like learn about her family?
Gunther: Sorry. She thought you were somebody else.
Ross: Look. Look, I wasnt going to say anything to you, but... All right, I dont think you should be seeing Tommy anymore.
Rachel: You dont?!
Ross: No! The guy is mean. I mean really mean. I think you should stay away from him.
Ross: Okay, fine, fine. You dont want to believe me? No, thats fine. (starts to leave)
Ross: You dont want to believe me, Im Mr. Funny to you. Mr. Funny (turns around and almost spills his coffee on Tommy)
Tommy: Hot coffee!!! You idiot!! You were gonna spill hot coffee all over me, huh?!! What are you just some big, dumb, stupid, doofy idiot, with a doofy idiot hairdo, huh?! Huh?!
Stage Manager: Look, we held the curtain for you buddy. Come on, lets go! Lets go!
Lauren: (answering the door) Vic! Where have you been, baby?!
Lauren: Ive been waiting up all night for ya. Where have you been? (Joey doesnt answer) Where have you been? Vic?!
Joey: Oh, ahh, go to the window. Im wanna run down to the truck and show you something.
Lauren: (at the window, shes looking down out of the window) What do you got down there, Vic? What do you got under that tarp?
Lauren: (whispering) Tonight. What are you doing?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Ross are in the kitchen, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the living room, and Phoebe is, you guessed it, still on hold.]
Chandler: Why dont you use ours across the hall, cause she has problems.
Ross: (coming out of the kitchen with a cup of coffee, almost running into Tommy) Oh-ho, whoa! Sorry, Tommy. I almost spilled this hot coffee on you.
Tommy: Yeah, but you didnt.
Rachel: Ross, would you just stop it! Its getting really old.
Phoebe: I do, I believe you.
Ross: You do Pheebs?
Tommy: (noticing the chick) Ooh, hey! Hey, there little fella. (picks up the chick) Mr. Fuzzy-Man, how are you doing? (starts to pet him) Aww. (The chick poops on his hand.) Eww! Oh! Eww! Gross! Idiot!! Stupid little, fuzzy, yellow creature!! Oh look at me, Im so cute, Im a little chick whos disgusting! God, youre so stupid, how are you not yet extinct!! (the duck wattles behind him and quacks) (to the duck) Quack-quack, quack-quack!! What are you quacking about?! Dumb Donald Doo-Doo!!
Tommy: Ooh, sorry little Mr. Chic-A-Dee, sorry you went doody in my hand! (starts to walk out and stops) (to Rachel) Well, I guess were not going out anymore. Whaa!!!
Kate: Im soo glad I caught you, I couldnt find you before.
Kate: Last night was wonderful. But I-I cant stay here just for you.
Joey: Well can you at least stay to the end of the play? I mean, Ill go to the airport with ya, I-I wanna say good bye.
Lauren: (yelling from onstage) Where are you Vic?
Joey: Yeah, I guess it is. (sees Kate is watching, he turns Lauren so that he can talk directly to Kate, but still look like he is talking to Lauren) Listen, I ah, I gotta say good bye, and-and I gotta say it quick cause this is killing me. One thing you gotta know, is that I will never forget you. But, youve got things you have to do now, and so do I. And so Im gonna get on this spaceship, (smoke starts pouring in from the ceiling, and a ladder comes down, with flashing, colored lights on the side of it) and Im gonna go to Blargon 7 in search of alternative fuels. But when I return, 200 years from now, youll be long gone. But I wont have aged at all. (gets on the ladder) So you tell your great-great-granddaughter to look me up, because Adrienne, baby, Im gonna want to meet her.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, except Joey, is there. Phoebe is, well you y'know.]
Phoebe: Sorry, Im so sorry, I will pay you back.
Phoebe: Well, I think I broke it. But thats all right, heres the number you can call.
Ross: You did it, man.
Monica: Hey! What did you decide to do about the movie?
Phoebe: Ross, how about you. What would you give up, sex or food?
Janice: We got the proofs back from that photo shoot, you know, the one with the little vegetables. Anyway, they pretty much sucked, so, I blew off the rest of the day, and I went shopping...(looks through her bags)... and I got you, I'm looking, I'm looking, I'm looking, I got you...
Dan: So, I'll call you tomorrow.
Joey: Oh no-no-no-no, she wants to talk to you!
Phoebe: Which one do you have?
Ross: I cant ask people to do that? Would you ask people to do that? (Holds out his pants)
Monica: Well, can't you just have the party when we get back?
Chandler: All right. I'll tell you what. When we're 40, if neither one of us are married, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
Ross: You really serve people sneezers?
Chandler: Look, I just wanted to apologize for last night. I got the feeling we made you a little uncomfortable.
Monica: Yes! Maybe its a false positive. Are you sure you peed on the stick right?
Ross: (on phone) Uh, hello dad! Monica and I just saw the house in the paper! (Listens) Yes were surprised! (Listens) Who did you leave a message with?
Mrs. Geller: (holding two pies) Monica, why don't you finish off these pies? I don't have any more room left in the fridge.
Chandler: Okay, worst case scenario. Say you never feel like a father.
INTERVIEWER: Now, I want you to tell me what you're doing while you're doing it.
Phoebe: No, not Phoebe, Dr. Philange. Oh no! You have it too!
Monica: Yeah, but I love you more. Besides yknow, nothing goes with Bing. So Im screwed. I mean (Rachel hands Emma to Monica.) Oh, hi Emma. Yeah, thats you. Youre our little Em. Oh whats that honey? What? Oh, you want a little cousin? (To Chandler) You want a cousin right now?!
Danny: I'd love to ask you in, but uh, my sister's visiting and I think she's asleep on the couch.
Sleepy girl, sleepy girl. Why won't you go to sleep? Sleepy girl, sleepy girl. You're, you're, you're keeping me uppp! (Yeah, that's to the tune of Smelly Cat.)
Phoebe: What are you, what are you talking about? How did this happen?
Joey: Maybe, I should call this place and get them to put my 'Days of Our Lives' on here. You know, juice this puppy up a little.
MNCA: Do you not see it?
Chandler: You have to really wanna see it.
Phoebe: Okay, so The Plaza! Okay, well get us some Mai Thais, (To Chandler) maybe no more for you though.
Phoebe: What-what are you talking about?!
Ross: Pheebs, youre talking about putting your body through an awful lot, I mean morning sickness, uhh, labour, and its all for somebody else!
Phoebe: Yeah, it's Y'know there'sno you may not!
Fat Monica: No. No, thank you!
Joey: No, no, I didnt mean you. But, you believed me, huh?
Chandler: So you might say, its a magic ring.
Phoebe: Hey Joey, yknow what? You are way to good for her.
Rachel: So Chandler, have you heard about Monica's secret boyfriend?
Monica: Youre supposed to double the tax. Not double the tax of Romania. I mean, whats-whats the deal? Are you, are you trying to buy me? Is this the way you get girls to go out with you?
Ross: Uh, so this play umm, what do you think? Its-its gotten great reviews! Yknow the uh
MRS. GELLER: Well, you kids thank Dr. Burke for the ride?
RACHEL: I did not sell you out.
Rachel: I dont care! All right, yknow what Im just upset that Im getting nowhere with Joshua thatyknow what still, you do not meet someone and go flitting off to Vermont!
Rachel: I can make you a legend. I can make you this generations Milton Berle.
JOEY: Phoebs look, if you want to know what the deal is, you're just gonna have to ask him.
Monica: What?! You can'twhat did you tell her?
The Cooking Teacher: (To Monica) Oh! Something smells good over at Monicas station! (She tries Monicas fettuccini.) Oh my God! This is absolutely amazing! Youve never made this before?
Fergie: Joey says you dont really like his hat, but I think its kinda dashing.
Chandler: Hey! You okay?
Monica: No, you cannot.
Chandler: Not if I kiss you first.
Janice: Uh-oh-okay. Uh-oh-okay. I know what you all are thinking. But Chandler is in Yemen! I'm a young woman! I have needs! I can't wait forever!
Chandler: Okay, no problem, just remember to wake us up before you go-go.
Rachel: Okay you have to realize, I was exhausted, I was emotional, I would have said yes to anybody. Like that time you and I got married! (Pause) Im not helping.
Mr. Tribbiani: I don't want you taking that thing.
Amy: (yelling from outside) Rachel!! Open up!! It's your sister!! (she knocks on the door again) I have to talk to you!!
Monica: Do you realize this is probably the last time well all be here in the coffee house as six single people?
Phoebe: Oh, I can't believe you called her fat.
Monica: You are insane! You-you gotta give this up!
Joey: (glares at him for a moment, then admits grudgingly) Maybe. Well, I just think you guys can do better than this house, you know? Or any other house for that matter.
Phoebe: No way! No way! You just broke with Tag a week ago.
Phoebe: It does! How would you feel if you couldnt share your cooking? Or-or imagine how Ross would feel if he couldnt teach us about dragons.
Rachel: Oh! I have your key. Here you go. (Hands it to Monica.)
Rachel: No, but it's good, you know, I'm gonna take some time off and do some charity work.
Fat Monica: Yeah, yeah, and you were going him y'know, your flower.
Chandler: Hey honey, you got the kind with the little girl, you said we were gonna to get the kind with the baby.
Chandler: Y'know what? You should go to my guy, because when I went in there with my third nipple. He just lopped it right off. Y'know? So I guess I'm lucky. I mean not as lucky as people who were born with two nipples.
MONICA: Remember it? What do you think this is, a freckle?
David: Sorry, I just... I wish there was something I could do, you know? Well, you know Phoebe...
Ross: I can't believe you let George Michael slap you.
Colleen: It's pretty much all the information you need.
Mike: You can't keep a rat in your appartment! They're extremely unsanitary, and they transmit leptospirosis and hantavirus.
Ross: No, no, no, no, no, I don't want to know, absolutely not. I think, you know, I think you should know until you look down there, and say, oop, there it is! (pauses) Or isn't...
Chandler: You got the lead in a movie? That's amazing! What's the movie about?!
Phoebe: (sighs) Honey, I wish you would get over her. I hate seeing you like this. Is there anything I can do for you? Do you want to look down my top?
Chandler: Or a job where you dont have to carry a table.
Rachel: No? So youre saying that if I called it, it wouldnt ring?
Jason: ...and I know I'll never miss doing it, but I gotta tell you, it's pretty cool knowing that you're making a difference in a kid's life.
Gunther: What if you put them here. (sets the empty tray on another stack of empty trays on the back counter.)
Ross: (on tape) Hello! Can I get you anything?
Chandler: You do know, I can just turn them the other way around, right?
Rachel: Well, congratulations, so do you love her?
The Teacher: Excuse me. Can, can I help you with something?
Phoebe: Ooh, now you lost me.
Rachel: (stopping him) Wh-whoa! All right, okay-okay, I see, I see what's going on here! Now listen, look-look, I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, but I am not some hussy who will just sleep around to get ahead! Now even though I (He tries to interrupt and tell her about the ink), hey-hey-hey, even though I kissed you, that does not give you the right to demand sex from me. I do not want, this job that bad. Good day, sir. (She storms out of his office.)
Joey: Uh, well yeah-yeah, I've got all of that going on. Yeah, listen uh, I want you to make sure you tell Chandler that he couldn't have been more wrong! Uh-oh! I gotta go Monica, my uh, my sushi's here!
Monica: No! Thats where we keep the canned goods! Have you completely forgotten everything you learned at orientation?
Ross: (pointing at Amy, shouting) No more falafel for you!
Monica: What do you say?
Ross: No. I think you misunderstood what I was saying. What I meant was
Monica: Wait a minute, she isnt Shes not the one who you
Joey: Okay, you picked the Gimmie card! You get all of Rosss points!
Joey: (aside, to Ross) Hey Ross! That art stuff worked, you hooked me up.
Rachel: No, I-I live with Phoebe. I mean youre [pity-tone] alone, alone. And I just-its just not the time for us. Im sorry.
Ross: That's funny, because you know, you are a huge crapweasel!
Monica: Wait. Rachel, no, hes married. Married! If you dont realize that, I cant help you.
Ross: Okay, I uh, I can't see you anymore.
Lizzie: No, no, I ha-I have to give you something.
CHANDLER: Would you come on! Come on! [waitress brings their coffee] Thank you.
RACH: Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross.
Rachel: You dont tell a guy that youre looking for a serious relationship! You dont tell the guy that! Now you scared him away!
Monica: What did you say?
Monica: Ill meet you there in two minutes.
Rachel: Return them?! Shh! Theyre gonna hear you!