words in movies
RACHEL: Mom, would you relax. That was 10 blocks from here and, the, the woman was walking alone at night, I would never do that. Mom, c'mon, stop worrying. This is a safe street, this is a safe building, there's nothing [a pigeon flies in the window and lands on the table] OH MY GOOOD, oh my God, oh I gotta go, I gotta go, I gotta go. [hangs up] OK, that's fine, you just read the paper, I'm gonna get a pot, it's not for you. [grabs a pot and lid] OK, that's fine, read the Family Circus, enjoy the gentle comedy. [puts pot over the pigeon] Aaahh, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, aaaaahh. [knock at the door] It's open you guys.
RACHEL: Hi, hi can I help you?
STRANGER: Hey, how, how did you do that?
JOEY: This is unbelievable Phoebs, how can you be married?
MONICA: I can't believe you married Duncan. I mean how could you not tell me? We lived together, we told each other everything.
PHOEBE: I'm sorry Monica but I knew if I told you, you'd get really, like, judgemental and you would not approve.
MONICA: Of course I wouldn't approve, I mean, you were totally in love with this guy who, hello, was gay. I mean, what the hell were you thinking?
ROSS: You see, and you thought she'd be judgemental.
MONICA: Please, when he left town you stayed in your pajamas for a month and I saw you eat a cheeseburger.
MONICA: Well, didn't you?
MONICA: I can't believe you didn't tell me.
PHOEBE: Oh, c'mon, like you tell me everything.
MONICA: What have I not told you?
PHOEBE: Oh, I don't know. Umm, how about the fact that the underwear out there on the telephone pole is yours from when you were having sex with Fun Bobby out on the terrace.
MONICA: Wait a minute, who told you? [turns to Chandler who's looking sheepish] You are dead meat.
MONICA: Oh it's not big, not at all, you know, kinda the same lines as, say, oh I don't know, having a third nipple.
PHOEBE: You have a third nipple?
CHANDLER: You bitch.
JOEY: I can't believe you. You told me it was a nubbin.
ROSS: Joey, what did you think a nubbin was?
JOEY: I don't know, you see somethin', you hear a word, I thought that's what it was. Let me see it again.
ROSS: You were in a porno?
JOEY: What happens if you flick it?
ROSS: So, uh, does it do anything, you know, special?
JULIE: You know, in some cultures having a third nipple is actually a sign of virility. You get the best huts and women dance naked around you.
ROSS: You know, you are so amazing, is there anything you, you don't know?
MONICA: Look honey, I wanted you to hook up with Ross as much as you did. But he's with her now and you're just gonna have to get over it.
JULIE: Where you goin'?
ROSS: [holding cream pitcher] Oh, darnit, we're all out of milk. [holds pitcher in front of Chandler's chest and flips the lid] Hey Chandler, would you fill me up here?
ROSS: OK sweetie, I'll see you later.
JULIE: See you later Rach.
ROSS: Can I ask you somethin'?
RACHEL: Why? Who's not having. . . Are you and Julie not, are, are you and, are you and Julie not having sex?
ROSS: It's just, it's, it's me. You, you know I've only been with one woman my whole life and she turned out to be a lesbian. So now I've got myself all psyched out, you know, and it's become, like this, this thing and I. . . Well, you just must think I'm weird.
RACHEL: No, no, no, no I don't think it's weird, I think, I think umm, in fact, in fact you know what I think?
RACHEL: Let me tell you something. As a woman there is nothing sexier than a man who does not want to have sex.
RACHEL: Oh yeah. In fact you know what I'd do?
RACHEL: Oh yeah, I don't care how much she tells you she wants it, I don't care if begs, she pleads, she tells you she, she's gonna have sex with, with another man. That just means it's working.
DUNCAN: Ahh, look at you, you look great.
PHOEBE: Do I? Thank you, so do you.
PHOEBE: Sparkly. So, wow, this is pretty wonerful, huh. Mr. major capades guy. I, I remember when you were just, like, King Friday in Mr. Roger's Ice is Nice.
DUNCAN: You always said I'd make it.
DUNCAN: I missed you. [they hug] I'm gonna get changed.
ROSS: Julie, can you hold this for a second, thanks. [hands her a bowl and kisses her]
CHANDLER: Sorry, you had a paleontologist on your face. But, uh, it's gone now, you're alright.
ROSS: [pulls Rachel aside] I just, I wanted to thank you for our uh, our little talk before.
ROSS: Well, I was going to, but after I talked to you, I talked to Joey.
ROSS: Basically he told me to get over myself and just do it, ya know. So I though about what you said and I though about what he said and, well, his way I get to have sex tonight so. . .
RACHEL: Well, well um, you know, these movies are offensive and uh, degrading to women and females. And uh, and the lighting's always unflattering. And, Monica help me out here.
JOEY: Shh, OK, here I come, here I come. See I'm comin' to fix the copier, I can't get to the copier, I'm thinkin' what do I do, what do I do. . . so I just watch 'em have sex. And then I say, wait, here's my line, [Joey from TV] you know that's bad fo r the paper tray.
JOEY: Thank you. Wait wait wait wait, you see me again. Hang on, the guy's butt's blockin' me. There I am, there I am, there I am, there I am, there I am. . .
PHOEBE: So um, so what's up, you came to see me yesterday.
DUNCAN: Oh God, I don't know how to tell you this. I'm straight.
PHOEBE: I, I don't, I don't understand, how can you be straight? I mean, you're, you're so smart and funny and you throw such great Academy Award parties.
DUNCAN: I know, that's what I kept telling myself but you just reach a point where you can't live a lie anymore.
PHOEBE: So how long have you known?
DUNCAN: Well I guess on some level I always knew I was straight. I though I was supposed to be something else, you know, I'm an ice dancer, all my friends are gay, I was just tryin' to fit in.
DUNCAN: Well, I've never told you this but, there were one or two times, back in college, when I'd get really drunk, go to a straight bar and wake up with a woman next to me. But I, I, I told myself it was the liquor and e-everyone experiments in college.
PHOEBE: I, I don't know what to say. I mean, you know, you're married to someone for six years and you think you know him and then one day says, 'Oh, I'm not gay.'
PHOEBE: Why couldn't you have just figured this out six years ago?
MONICA: You know, it still smells like monkey in there.
RACHEL: No, no, I mean, no, c'mon you guys, I mean, c'mon look it's only eleven thirty. Let's just talk, we never just hang out and talk anymore.
RACHEL: Well, you have been in our lives for nearly two months now and we don't really know you. I mean, who is Julie? I mean, what do you like, what don't you like? We wanna hear everything.
PHOEBE: So, um, have you told your parents?
PHOEBE: [handing him the papers] Here you go. You know what, I just have one more question, um, if you had figured this out sooner and um, I had been around, do you think that I would have been the one who. . . no, um, I'm sorry, don't tell me, I don't th ink either answer would make me feel better.
DUNCAN: I love you Phoebe. [they hug and kiss]
RACHEL: Oh, well, are hey, are you nervous?
RACHEL: Uh, OK, I mean uh, what, how are you gonna handle it. I mean, are, are ya gonna, are ya gonna talk about it before hand, are you just gonna pounce?
RACHEL: Nothing, I mean, um, it is your first time with her and, you know if the first time doesn't go well, well then that's, that's pretty darn hard to recover from.
RACHEL: Maybe you should put it off.
ROSS: No, no, I don't wanna put it off, I just, God I just, I spent last year being so unbelievably miserable, ya know, and now, now I'm actually happy. You know, I mean, really happy. I just, I just don't wanna, I don't wanna mess it up, ya know.
RACHEL: Maybe it, maybe it doesn't have to be this tough. I mean, maybe you were on the right track with this whole, you know, spontaneous thing. I mean, women really like that.
RACHEL: Yeah, I mean, you know it, I mean, if it were me I, I, you know, I'd want you to, I don't know, like catch me off guard, you know, with like a really good kiss, you know really, sort of um, soft at first, then maybe um brush the hair away from my face, and look far into my eyes in a way that let's me know that something amazing is about to happen.
RACHEL: And then, I don't know, I mean you'd pull me really close to you so that, so that I'd be pressed up, you know, right against you. And, um, it would get kind of sweaty and uh, and blurry, and then it's just happening.
Mike: But if you wanna get married why didn't you say something before?
(Chandler takes Monica's hand, and gets serious) Look, before we sign anything we really have to talk...(pause) We're not who you think we are.
Chandler: Ok, so now that you're in, what are you gonna do if we win?
Phoebe: How can you let him talk to your crotch like that?
Phoebe: Oh can I? Vegetarians never get to do the wishbone. It's really not fair either! You know, just because we don't eat the meat doesn't mean we don't like to play with the carcasses!
Joshua: (turning around) Oh! You know what I need?
Joey: (looks at her for a moment) What the hell are you talking about??
Monica: Joey!! What the hell were you doing?!
Monica: All right, well call you when we get back.
Chandler: Okay. Thats better. Now I want you to both apologize to each other and mean it.
Chandler: Whoa-ho, whoa! No, I was thinking about y'know for me, as a part of that whole getting over Janice thing you were talking about.
Phoebe: Yeah, okay, Ive-Ive been dating both of you, and its been really horrible. Cause y'know its been a lot of fun, for me. Umm, but I-I like you both, and I, and I didnt know how to chose, so... Im sorry, Im just, Im terrible, Im a terrible person. Im terrible.
Ross: I just wanted to tell you something before you heard it from someone else and I hope this isn't too weird, but uh, I had uh, a thing with Janice. (He laughs, his real laugh this time.) What you're-you're not mad?
Phoebe: Yes, yes I do. God, oh its just perfect! Wow! I bet it has a great story behind it too. Did they tell you anything? Like yknow where it was from or
Chandler: I'm sure it's somebody for you. Now, go hide. (Ross hides in the bedroom again)
Monica: Well, after 15 years of mom and dad keeping it as a shrine to you, its time the velvet ropes came down.
Ross: Thanks you guys. (Walks away happily and his parents smile.)
Phoebe: Oh my God, you guys are selling the entertainment center?
Chandler: Well I'm not showing you my 'tat.'
Dr. Harad: Okay. You ready to push again?
Ross: You're just jealous because you couldn't pull this off. Yeah, now if you'll excuse me (getting up and taking his coat) I have a date. (As he is walking out, everyone turns and stares at him) See? (To Joey) ALL eyes on ME!
Tim: Thank you so much! Cause I-I know I can do better!
Phoebe: (to Robert) Youve have lipstick right here (points to her cheek). Thats okay, its mine, we just kissed.
Woman: (To Ross and Rachel) Congratulations you two!
Joey: Okay. Now youre gonna want to have sex with me when you hear it, but you have to remember it is just the story.
Monica: (still talking to the woman) All right, Ill do it just this once! But you cant tell anybody!
Rachel: Yeah! I'm going to Paris. Thank you, Ross!
Monica: Isn't that sad? I mean, can you see how pathetic that is? You shouldn't be jealous. You should feel bad for him.
ROSS: You got me a cola drink?
Phoebe: I'm sorry, Frank. I didn't realise things were so bad. You know, I'll help out more. I can - I can babysit any time you want. You name the day, and I'll be there.
Joey: If you want, Ill sell my friends and use the money to buy you presents.
JOEY: Hey, look, since we're neighbors and all, what do you say we uh, get together for a drink?
Receptionist: The doctor will be right with you sir.
ROSS: No no, no, that, that's your Christmas tip, alright. Oh, hey, do you think there's a chance you could fix that radiator now?
Joey: Calm down, do you want this unit or not?
Chandler: I thought maybe you got me porn for Valentines Day.
RACHEL: But I do not want to have everything decided for me. I spent my whole life like that. It's what I had with Barry, that was one of the reasons I left. I, I like not knowing right now and I'm sorry if that scares you but if you want to be with me you are gonna have to deal with that.
Joey: (standing behind her) Uh, you gotta press the button. (Does so.)
Rachel: Do you have any ice?
Chandler: No, I invited him to dinner so you could get a chance to get to know him! I mean, if we go through a sperm bank you never meet the guy, get to check him out.
Joey: You were right before. I mean, friends are so important.
Rachel: (coming down the stairs) Hey! (Ross jumps up, and quickly puts the letter back together, pretending like he has just finished it.) What happened to you? Why didnt you come up?
Monica: (To Rachel) Apparently you were umm, a little mean to him in high school.
Steve: Yeah, he's the handy man. He's gonna be retiring next week and everyone who lives here is kicking in a 100 bucks as a thank you for all the hard work type of thing.
VAN DAMME: You don't think I'm cute?
Rachel: Ross! I think she is trying to make something happen with you to get back at me!
Joey: Oh hey, you should be excited about him. Theres nothing wrong with him hes a good guy.
Joshua: All right, thank you so much for all your help.
Rachel/actress: It's over! You have to accept that.
Joey: Whoa-whoa you guys, it's not a cat!
Ross: (on the phone) Ive been thinking, this is crazy, I mean dont, dont you think we can work on this?
Phoebe: If you wouldve let me finish, it goes on to say that hes probably not gay.
ROSS: What? You have a date? Who with?
Joey: Youre not stupid. Youre meaner than I thought.
Rachel: Since when do you watch the news?
Phoebe: So have you decided on a band for the wedding? Because, yknow, Im kinda musical.
Monica: Are you serious? (they all look) Oh my God.
Rachel: Well, you more then me, but he cant stay to mad at me. I mean, I just had his baby.
Melissa: Hmm Phoebe, were you ever in a sorority?
Rachel: Do you want me to quit?
Joey: Maybe you could take Charlie shopping.
PHOEBE: No. What do you, what do you want me to be, like some stupid, big, like, purple dinosaur?
Joey: You were supposed to duck!!! Why didnt you duck?
Charlie: And you know, you can just give me my stuff whenever you want.
Chandler: So, how would you like to have a baby that's half yours and half his!
Judge: Now it also says here that you lied about your sexual preference before marriage?
Mindy: (to Rachel) You did it twice?
Rachel: I mean, do you think there are people who go through life never having that kind of...
Chandler: Why are you so sure I didn't watch this tape?
MONICA: Hey, you got me, put it in.
Rachel: Yeah, you got like 14 hours until she has to be at the airport, and youre sitting here in the hallway with a 28-year-old cheerleader with a fat lip.
Monica: Okay. Umm, y'know, I dont think, I dont think I told you this, but umm, I just got out of a really serious relationship.
Dina: I I dont care about fashion! Im pregnant! And I know you are too, so you gotta help me!
Chandler: Youre turning into a woman.
Amy: (thinks about it) You’re right, you’re right! I’m gonna do it!
Phoebe: Yeah! It really has been great too, you know, some of this people must have seen me play before because they were requesting a bunch of my songs! Yeah, "You suck" and "shut up and go home".
Ross: Look, I-I know its not a proposal and I dont know where you are, but with everything thats been going on and with Emma and Ive been feeling
Janice: Im telling you Rachel, listen to Janice. They all say theyre gonna be there until they start their real family.
Janine: Hey! Youre a good dancer!
Ross: Why aren't you guys dressed?
David: Wow, you look even... more beautiful than you did yesterday.
Rachel: Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed?
Lizzie: Would you like my tin-foil hat?
Monica: Who do you wanna fool around with?
Chandler: Wh-How did you lose at Cups?!
Chandler: No! Youre the sweetest! (He tries to kiss her but Monica backs away with a look that could kill on her face.)
Ross: Hey! Hey! Hey! I get to choose my best man, and I want both you guys.
Monica: (Takes it) That's Mindy? Wow, she is pretty. (Sees Rachel's look) Lucky. To have had a friend like you.
Joey: I was going for quiet desperation. But if you have to ask...
Rachel: No honey, we're sorry, we didn't mean it. I love you. I love you.
Rachel: (Looking through her purse.) Okay, you know what? I dont have it, but I can tell you exactly where it is on my night stand, and...okay. But you know what? I have my drivers license and I have a twenty. (She slides it across the counter.)
Monica: Look! You knew this about me when you married me! You agreed to take me in sickness and in health. Well, this is my sickness!
Chandler: So, ahh, how are ya? How ya...How ya... You okay?
Joey: Come on man, just-just let the girls stay, Ill do whatever you want.
Monica: I was just saying that because I was ovulating and you said you wouldn�t have sex with me while we�re fighting.
Robert: Ah, good to meet you. Robert.
Phoebe Sr: What are you doing here?!
Phoebe: Youre kidding! And he plays rugby?! Thats so funny. (Realises) Ohh! I see how you did that. All right.
Rachel: Well, it gets worse. When asked if you take initiative I wrote, "Yes, he was able to unhook my bra with minimal supervision," and under Problems with Performance I wrote, "Dear God, I hope not," and then uh, then I drew a little smiley face, and then a small pornographic sketch.
Phoebe: Thats the same month as Halloween. So, um, what kinda things do you like to do at home?