words in movies
[Scene: The Hospital, Ross and Rachel, whos in a wheelchair, are arriving in the waiting room for the maternity ward.]
Monica: How are you doing?
Nurse: Im sorry. Semi-private rooms are all we have.
Ross: Well then wed be in a lot of trouble, you dont know where any countries are. (Rachel glares at him.) Okay. (He goes over to the desk followed by Rachel.) Uh, say would you umm Would you mind checking again to see if any umm, private rooms may have (Handing her some money) opened up?
Rachel: How are you?
Julie: Yeah, we are going to share every moment of this with you. And I think were gonna have some fun.
Monica: What?! Are you kidding me?! You-you-you think were ready to have a baby now?!
Joey: (voice all high and weird) What?! Are you crazy?!
Ross: Are you kidding? Look, were not gonna be together just because were having a baby. Okay?
Ross: Wow! Sorry. So uh, how are the new people?
Evil Bitch: Are you looking at her?!
Monica: What is going on with you? Since when are you so crazy about babies?
Monica: We are pretty good.
Monica: So were gonna try? I mean, are we trying?
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Evil Bitch and Sick Bastard are gone and Ross has just finished talking to a nurse as Rachel stands and stretches.]
[Scene: Another Waiting Room, Phoebe and Joey are trying to find out where the guy with the broken leg is.]
[Scene: Outside Room 816, Phoebe and Joey are approaching.]
Dr. Long: We are moving along, just slowly. (Rachel lies back and sighs.) Dont worry, youre doing great. Ill be back soon. (Exits.)
Joey: Okay. And uh, are you married.
Cliff: Are all the questions this personal?
Joey: Excellent! Excellent! And uh, finally, are you into any weird stuff yknow, sexually?
(Ross and Rachel are, needless to say, stunned at the arrival of Janice.)
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Chandler and Monica are entering to see if they in fact did hear Janice.]
Monica: I cant believe this is taking so long. How are you doing?
[Scene: Room 816, Phoebe and Cliff are eating some pudding with spoons.]
Rachel: Are you okay?
Rachel: So? You guys are all sleep deprived. I dont see you weeping because you put your slippers on the wrong feet. Oh God. (Starts to cry harder.)
Rachel: Well what are we going to do?
Ross: Ugh, easy for you to say, you already know what your kids names are going to be.
Rachel: Well tell us! What are they?
[Scene: A Janitorial Closet, Monica and Chandler are emerging slowly.]
Janice: Hes a keeper. How are you feeling?
Janice: I hate to be the one to say it, but honey you two (Her and Emma) are on your own.
Ross: Oh what are you kidding? Shes gorgeous, its all Rachel.
Phoebe: Im sorry, for the last time, why arent you two together again? (Silence from Ross.) No, I know. I know, because youre not in that place. Which would be fine, except you totally are.
Rachel: Ive just been thinking about how my baby and I are gonna be all alone.
Joey: What are you talking about alone? What about Ross?
Joey: Hey, listen to me, listen to me you are never ever gonna be alone. Okay? I promise thats not gonna happen.
Joey: Yeah, what are ya gonna do?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting at the kitchen table, talking.]
Chandler: Hey, what are you doing here? Shouldnt you be at work?
Rachel: Um, ok, uh, oh god, um, when you and uh Ross first started going out, it was really hard for me, um, for many reasons, which I'm not gonna bore you with now, but um, I just, I see how happy he is, you know, and how good you guys are together, and um, Monica's always saying how nice you are, and god I hate it when she's right.
Rachel: Dont!! (Joey backs away frightened.) (To Jill) Honey, what are you doing here?!
Ross: Rachel! What are you doing here?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is working as Phoebe and Ross are sitting on the couch.]
Jill: (entering, carrying a bunch of shopping bags) I just had the hardest day. Those bags are so heavy. (Sets them down.)
Joey: (to a customer) Are you all finished here?
Rachel: You went shopping?! What, and then you just came in here and paraded it right under Jills nose when you know shes trying to quit. Wow, you guys are terrible!
Phoebe: And, and then I got uh, these are apartment pants.
Rachel: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. (She sits down next to him.) All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in your h(sees that hes bald)arms! You-you get all that peace and quiet that youve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! You canooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when youre old, Cappy.
Monica: (wiping her nose) Are you saying that you dont wanna get with this? (Tries to do a little sexy body rub, but it doesnt work all that well with the big robe.)
Chandler: I was asleep. (She takes off her robe and starts to shiver) Oh no! No-no honey! Yknow whats sexy? Layers. Layers are sexy. And blankets are sexy. And oh! Hot water bottles are sexy.
Chandler: No-no-no-no-no-no-no, you are not getting me this way.
Rachel: Hi! Wh-what are you doing here?
Jill: This is where Ross and I are meeting for our date. So, what do you think? (She spins to show Rachel the outfit shes wearing.)
Monica: Im with you Chandler! I mean I cant have sex with a sick person either, thats disgusting! But Im not sick! Let me prove it to you. We are two healthy people in the pribe of libe.
Rachel: Uh, Im just, Im just looking out your window. At-at the view. What are you guys doing?
Chandler: (calling from the bathroom) What are you doing here?
Rachel: (on tape) (Ross hands her a glass of wine) I cannot believe that I did this. Especially after Monica just went on and on and on about it! (Mimicking Monica) "Okay Rachel! Here are the invitations Rachel! Now be very careful Rachel! Please, drinking no liquids around the invitations Rachel!" (She tilts her wine glass above and moves it back and forth across the invitations) Whoa oh! Oh-oh-oh! Oh oh-oh-oh
Joey: (sees Rachel) Oh, uh, hey Rach. I uh, I was just coming over here to uh Oh wait, I dont have to lie to you, you dont live here anymore. Uh, Im eating their food. What are you doing?
Monica: Are you kidding me?! Is this; is this turning you on?
Monica: (To Rachel) Oh, are the drapes still closed hon?
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Rachel are there. Phoebe enters carrying video tapes.]
Rachel: Oh Ross, hi! Hey, how are ya? There you are!
(She grabs his arm and drags him over to a table where three beautiful women are sitting. Now, Im going to go out on a limb and say that their names are Stephanie, Karin, and Meg. Okay, so I looked at the credits. Of course, only Meg is named later on, so Ill have to guess who is Stephanie and who is Karin. But, well cross that bridge when we come to it.)
The Fan: Are you Phoebe Buffay?
Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
Jill: Why are you so jealous of me?
Phoebe: Are you leaving "The Supremes"? (Monica and Phoebe go to one side)
Chandler: You didnt get more movies that are gonna have us reaching for the tissues all night did you?
Monica: Yes, but you are dead inside.
Monica: Why are you reading this? You hate this kind of stuff.
[Scene: The Hallway between the apartments, Joey, Janine, Chandler, and Monica are returning from a double date. Chandler is telling a joke.]
Rachel: (on phone) What is my sister doing there?! And why are the drapes shut?!
Ross: Slides are almost ready.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, time lapse, Ross is entering. Chandler and Monica are at the kitchen table. Rachel is on the couch reading.]
Jill: (To Ross) And you! I throw myself at you and you say no, how gay are you?
Rachel: Hey, you guys! Guess what? Barry and Mindy are getting a divorce!
Rachel: Wow! How are you?!
Joey: (shrugging his shoulders to go along with it) Vomiting stories are funny...
Gunther: Okay, here are the tips for this morning. Jen gets 50, 50 for me, and Joey owes eight dollars.
Monica: You are so sweet to notice! Yes, I lost three and a half pounds!
Rachel: Oh yeah. Right. So now, aredo you, do you still do music?
Rachel: (stunned) You are friends with Dr. Drake Remoray?
Monica: (laughs) You realize what you are dont you?
Joey: (entering) Hey there you are!
Chandler: Phoebe, are you having a heart attack?!
Chandler: But the Kit-Kats are all right?!
{Transcribers Note: This is an hour-long special episode. Which means that the first part of this episode is episode 615. The second part of this episode is episode 616. Since episodes 615 and 616 are combined into one file, thats why there is no episode 616 in the season 6 table of contents and the numbers jump from episode 615 to 617.}
[Scene: The hospital, Chandler and Monica are there with Phoebe as Ross enters.]
[Scene: A hospital, Phoebe is recovering from her heart attack as Ross, Monica, and Chandler are there to comfort and support her.]
Chandler: (entering) Oh hey Rachel, sweetheart? You have got to tell the post office that you have moved. Okay? We are still getting all your bills and stuff. (Hands her all of her bills and stuff.)
Chandler: I always thought having a heart attack was natures way of telling you to die! (Phoebe glares at him.) But youre not gonna die. I mean, you are going to die, but youre not gonna die today. I wish I was dead.
Chandler: But those are the words! Those exact words!
[Scene: A judges chambers, Rachel and Ross are filing their annulment papers.]
Chandler: I dont wanna know what Monica got me. Yknow? I mean, look, Im sure she worked really hard at getting you a present, and wanting to surprise me, and you guys are gonna ruin that, and I, look we have to put these back, this is not what Christmas is about.
Monica: Yknow what? You are right?!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
[Scene: The hospital, Ross and Monica are in Phoebes room. Phoebe is in the bathroom and Monica notices smoke coming out from underneath the door.]
CHANDLER: Alright you guys are off to party number one [ushers 3 guys into Monica's apartment] and you, you are off to party number two [ushers four women into his apartment. Two guys try to follow and Chandler blocks them and shoos them off to Monica's apartment] Alright fellas, let's keep it movin', let' keep it movin.
Ross: So honey this uh, this threesome thing umm, I mean how-how are you gonna start to find
Phoebe: What are you two girls whispering about over there?!
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are eating Monicas dinner.]
Chandler: No you are not! You are sweet and wonderful and this is gonna happen for you.
Joey: When was the last time someone told you just how beautiful you are?
Joey: Come on man! (To Gary) Listen so uh, are you gonna squeeze the perps shoes a little bit before he lawyers up?
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, continued from earlier. Monica and Chandler are still discussing the previous question.]
Monica: I know! Ill tell you something, we are gonna do that again!
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa! Youre not gonna use the pay phone to call work, are ya?
[Cut back to her room, Joey and Ross are sitting there waiting for her.]
Monica: Are you okay?
Jack: What are you doing here?
Monica: Yknow, I dont have an appointment, but I sure could use a physical. (He laughs halfheartedly) Are you sure youre okay?
Jack: Are you all right?
Rachel: Let me uh, let me ask you something, do wedding vows mean squat to you people?! And why is it that the second we tell you were going out of town, bamn there you are in bed with the neighbors dog walker?!
Rachel: Who are these men?
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe are there. Phoebes cell phone rings and she goes through her little routine of lighting a cigarette before answering the phone.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Chandler, and Phoebe are there. Joey is working.]
Joey: Are you kidding me?! I love Archie! And the whole gang!
Ross: So what are you gonna do?
Joey: (to Rachel) Will you hurry up? Did you not hear me before when I told you that all of Janines friends are dancers?! And that theyre going to be drinking alot!?
Joey: Oh thats too bad. Ive kinda been saving up. (She just looks at him in horror.) Uh, are you sure theres no studies I can participate in?
Receptionist: Oh that one is available now, but only identical twins are eligible. Its a twins study.
Ross: All right, thats it! (He runs over to Ben, but he runs past him and out the door.) Comeyouno! You are in big trouble young man!
Chandler: Okay, are you aware unagi (does the finger thing) is an eel?
[Rachel is in the kitchen fiddling with her English truffle. Joey and Ross, anxious to leave and go to Janines party, are egging her on to hurry up.]
Chandler: But I made you a tape of what I think are all romantic songs.
Chandler: You are totally and completely 100% forgiven.
Chandler: Wow! (To the sock bunny still on his hand.) You are way to young to have seen that!
Joey's Look-A-Like: Im Joey! How are you doin?!
Monica: Who the hell are you?!
Chandler: Yknow sometimes the good ideas are just right in front of you, arent they?
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's, Phoebe and Rachel are returning.]
Ross: Its not something you are! Its something you have!
Phoebe: Say we are unagi!
Joey: Thats right! And what are you not gonna do?
Monica: You are just the sweetest. (They kiss.)
Chandler: So, are we going in there?