words in movies
Joey: Okay listen, how are you gonna ask her?
Chandler: It is going to be perfect. I am taking her to her favorite restaurant. Im going to get her a bottle of the champagne that she really loves; therefore knows how expensive it is. Then when the glasses are full, instead of proposing a toast Im just gonna propose.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey are there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Are any of you guys free tonight? My boss is hosting this charity event for underprivileged kids and the more people I bring, the better I look. So, Monica? Chandler?
Joey: Where are you going?
Phoebe: Yknow, you are 12 years older than her.
Ross: Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I had no idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological age difference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, it doesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one dating Elizabeth, not you!
Chandler: (To Monica) You are beautiful.
{Transcribers Note: Elizabeth has two friends in the room with her who are named in the credits, but not in this scene. So Im just gonna guess since it doesnt matter one way or the other. (The last part is to discourage e-mails, who cares if I got it right or not?)}
Elizabeth: The guys across the hall are throwing water balloons at us.
Rachel: What are you doing?
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are sitting at a table. Monica is checking her makeup as Chandler suddenly has a horrifying thought and starts patting down his pockets until he finds what hes looking for and sighs in relief.]
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: Are you okay?
Chandler: Yes! Yes! Im good! Are you good? Are you good? Is everythingare youare you perrr-perfect?!
Chandler: Oh, yeah. (Starts to take it off and then realizes) Uh, no you cant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you were going to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, are you okay? Are you okay?
Monica: (laughs) Are you sure youre okay?
[Scene: The Charity Event, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are sitting at their table.]
Rachel: I know. Okay. (Whispering and thinking.) Okay. Okay. All right. All right, this is what were gonna do, we are gonna go to the next highest bidder, and we are just gonna let them buy it, and then youre just gonna pay the difference.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Chandler are returning to find Ross is there waiting for them.]
[Scene: The Charity Event, Rachel and Phoebe are sitting at the table as Joey approaches.]
Joey: Are you kidding me?! Shes gonna this boat!
Rachel: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. (She sits down next to him.) All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in your h(sees that hes bald)arms! You-you get all that peace and quiet that youve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! You canooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when youre old, Cappy.
Monica: What are you up too?
Monica: Ohhh! What are you doing to me?! Oh look, I-I Im sorry but umm, this-this-this-this is not going to happen.
Richard: You are?
[Scene: A Pizza Joint, Chandler and Monica are eating lunch.]
Monica: Wait a minute. Are you honestly telling me that-that you may never want to get married?
Monica: Oh my God! Then-then-then what are we even doing?! What is this?!
(She gets up and storms out. The people at the other tables are staring at Chandler.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are still talking.]
Rachel: Well yknow, some people make deals with a friend, like if neither of them are married by the time theyre 40, they marry each other.
Rachel: Are you serious?!
Rachel: Wh So If neither of you are married by the time youre 40, youre gonna marry Joey.
Joey: There are?
Rachel: So what do you say we make a pact? If you and I are both single by the time were 40, we get married. I mean, we know each other, we like each other, and weve-weve already slept together so yknow therell be no surprises there! You know what I mean? No like, "Whats that?!"
Rachel: Okay, yknow what?! I know-I know how to settle this! All right here, this is what were gonna do! Im gonna write Joey on one napkin (does so) and Im gonna right Ross on the other napkin (does so) and we are going to pick one! And that person is going to be our backup! Okay?
Richard: Well, apparently Im willing to offer her things that you are not.
Chandler: It was working until you showed up, you big tree! I mean, this isnt fair. You had your chance with her! You had your chance and you blew it! And this is my chance and I am not going to blow it because we are meant for each other! And this is all just been one stupid mistake! (Sits down heavily.) I was gonna propose tonight.
Chandler: Yknow Richard you are a good guy.
Chandler: What are you talking about?
Carol: Where are they?
[Scene: Carol's Room, she is ready to give birth. Everyone is there except for Phoebe, Ross, and Susan, who are in the broom closet.]
Ross: Let me see, I gotta see, I gotta see. Oh, a head. Oh, it's, it's huge. Carol, how are you doing this?
Dr. Franzblau: I don't know, could be an hour, could be three, but relax, she's doing great. So, uh, tell me, are you currently involved with anyone?
Phoebe: (laughing) You are just nonstop!
Chandler: (in a deep voice) Men are here.
Phoebe: So how are things going with you two? Is she becoming your (provocatively) special someone?
[Time lapse. Chandler and Joey are making the fire, Monica and Phoebe are inside. Ross enters, carrying luggage.]
Phoebe: Nuh-uh. I don't think any of our lives are ever gonna be the same ever again.
Melanie: Oooh, I gotta tell you... you are nothing like I thought you would be.
[Scene: Joey's Bedroom, he and Melanie are in bed together.]
Monica: Then why the hell are you dumping my brother?!?
Monica: Uh, so, uh, Rach, uh... do you wanna save this wrapping paper, I mean, it's only a little bit torn... so are you gonna go for it with Ross or should I just throw it out?
Joey: What, are you crazy? When a blind man gets his sight back, does he walk around like this? (Joey closes his eyes and walks around with arms spread.)
Chandler: No, actually I meant my fingers. Look at 'em, look at how happy they are.
Ross: (pause) No. But... it only has to happen once. Look, you and I both know we are perfect for each other, right? I mean... so, the only question is... are you attracted to me?
Rachel: Oh, there you are! Hi! Oh, so, so, how was China, you? (Hits him with the flowers.)
Rachel: These are, these aren't for you. (to Julie) These are for you. (Loudly, thinking she can't speak English.) Welcome to our country.
(There's a lot of yelling and screaming coming from the hallway, and they get up to look at what's the noise all about. In the hallway, Monica, Chandler, Joey and Phoebe are having another wind-up animal race, yelling and screaming fanatically.)
Ross: Ironically, these are the guys who were picked last in gym.
Chandler: Whoa! And this manchild has no problem with how old you are?
Phoebe: I know I'm not, but you are, and I was trying to spare your feelings.
Ross: Hey, Paulo. What are you doing here?
Chandler: Are you sure he's gonna be able to crack that code?
Phoebe: All right. (Talking to Monica's hair.) Now some of you are gonna get cut, and some of you aren't. But I promise none of you are gonna feel a thing.
Joey: Look, I can sense when women are depressed and vulnerable. It's one of my gifts.
Rachel: (sticking her head in from the balcony) Wait, are you leaving?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are showing off Ben to the gang.]
Ross: (following them into the kitchen) What are you guys doing?
Chandler: I know, I know, but youre gonna have plenty of chances. There are literally thousands of women out there just waiting to screw me over.
Ross: (loudly) Why?! Are there like bears or something?! (Looks around and then sees that Elizabeth is shaking her head no and realizes what Elizabeth meant.) Ohh. Oh, protection. Yeah-no, yeah-no, that-that-that I forgot.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Rachel, and Joey are eating, and Phoebe is preparing Ben's milk.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ben is playing in his crib while Chandler and Ross are leaning against the rim and are completely asleep.]
Ross: (to Monica) So, uh, Jules tells me you guys are going shopping tomorrow?
Chandler: You're damn right I'm right. I say you show this guy what you're made of. I say you stand your ground. I say you show him that you are the baddest hombre west of the lingerie.
[Scene: The Geller household kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are cooking for Mrs. Gellers party.]
[Scene: The Department Store, Joey and the Hombre man are facing off in Joey's section.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Julie and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
(Joey turns around and sees his face on a poster in the subway. The poster says: What Mario isn't telling you...V.D., you never know who might have it. A variety of scenes are shown with the poster displayed all over New York City.)
ROSS: Oh you guys are not gonna believe what happened.
JANICE: Is it yours? Ha! You wish, Chandler Bing. You are looking at a married lady now.
Ross: Both logic and math are taking a serious hit today.
RACHEL: She's right. She's right. You are no different than the rest of them.
MONICA: Wait a minute, wait a minute. Yes he is. You are totally different.
RACHEL: You are ready to make a commitment!
MONICA: You are not a freak. You're a guy.
MONICA: Wait a minute, who told you? [turns to Chandler who's looking sheepish] You are dead meat.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Ross, and Julie are sitting on the couch.]
ROSS: You know, you are so amazing, is there anything you, you don't know?
[Scene: Central Perk close to closing. Ross and Julie are still there. Rachel is cleaning tables.]
Joey: You don't kiss your friend's mom! Sisters are okay, maybe a hot-lookin' aunt... but not a mom, never a mom!
[Scene: Chandler's Office, Chandler & Nina are locked in a passionate embrace. Someone knocks, so they hurriedly separate to stare out of the window. Chandlers boss opens the door.]
RACHEL: Oh, well, are hey, are you nervous?
Ross: Thanks. I know you guys like to give me a hard time and all, but it really means a lot to me that you like her. Just knowing that you guys are
[Scene: At Chandler and Joey's. Ross and Chandler are there. Ross is watching wrestling.]
JADE: So, are we gonna get together or what?
ROSS: Oh my god. You are pure evil.
Chandler: What? (turns around quickly still ready to throw the dart and Joey quickly ducks and hides behind the chair) What are you, what are you talking about?
RACHEL: So uh, what are you guys doing for dinner tonight?
ROSS: Ok, sweetheart, I'll call you later tonight. Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, hey, hey, you're not really gonna go through with this, are you?
WAITER: Are we ready to order?
RACHEL: Yeah, these are pretty ch-ching.
JOEY: What are these, like famous chickens?
MRS. GREENE: Oh well thank you. Such a gentleman. Thank you. [Chandler takes the hot pink coat and grimaces at it] Ahh, it all looks so nice, so festive, all the balloons... [Chandler, remembering that Joey and Mr. Greene are in the bedroom, throws her coat in a cupboard] The funniest thing happened to me on the way here. I was...[Joey peeks out]
Flight Attendant: Oh, oooh. I'm sorry. You are not allowed on the jetway unless you have a boarding pass.
[Scene: Museum of Prehistoric History, Ross and a co-worker (Marsha) are setting up an exhibit which includes some mannequins of cave people.]
ROSS: Geez! Are you ready?
STEVE: How are you? Look, you guys wanna meet the group? Come on. So, are you one of the ones who fooled around with my dad?
MONICA: You know, the guys are probably having a great time.
CHANDLER: Yes, apparently Stevie and the band are like this.
ROSS: Let me hold him for a sec. There. (Ben stops crying) Huh? There we are.
JOEY: Are you ok, Ross?
Janice: Oh, we go way back. Before Monica made an honest man out of him, Chandler used to be my little love muffin! (does her irritating laugh). So? Are you guys thinking of getting this house too? Ooh! Are we gonna have a bidding war? I'd better warn you, I'm a toughie (playfully punches Chandler, who tries to get away from her)
CAROLINE: I think it's great you guys are doing this.
CHANDLER: Well, we are great guys.
(Chandler and Joey are loaded down with baby stuff, and Ben)
PHOEBE: Well you said that he's paying the people who are playing.
MONICA: Ok. Oh boy. You are doin' so good. You wanna squeeze my hand? All right, Ross, don't squeeze it so hard. Honey, really, don't squeeze it so hard! Oh, Ross! Let go of my hand!
Chandler: We are. Hes meeting us here.
MONICA: Are you sure he didn't break it because it really hurts.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Phoebe are still working on his interviewing techniques.]
CHANDLER: You, you are gonna love this.
STEPHANIE: (singing) Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
TOGETHER: Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, it's not your fault.
Mr. Douglas: Ohh, its been better. The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in.
CHAN: Alright, OK, alright. But if we put on spandex and my boobs are bigger than yours, I'm goin' home.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Joey are sitting on the couch. Rachel is working.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Joey are sitting on the couch.]
Erica: I don't think so. Although, they did mention something about two heartbeats. But I thought that was just mine and the baby's. They kept saying both heartbeats are really strong, and I thought well, that's good 'cause I'm having a baby.
MONICA: How many perfectly fine women are you gonna reject over the most superficial insignificant things?
RACH: Oh, you're not having fun, are you?
[Scene: The Restaurant, Joey, Lorraine, Chandler, and Janice are at the table. Joey and Lorraine are seated very close, Chandler and Janice have backed their chairs away from one another.]
RACH: Are you over me?
[Scene: Ross' apartment. Ross, Chandler, and Joey are there eating pizza.]
MNCA: [reading the paper] There are no jobs. There are no jobs for me.
PHOE: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey, Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler are there; Chandler is showing everyone his new computer.]
Rachel: Aah! Why? What are these for?
JOEY: Oh, her ankles are a little chubby.
Ross: Hey! There are some men who will do whatever it takes to make their marriage work! Okay? There are some men who will stand by and-and watch as their wives engage in-in what only can be described as a twosome with some-some woman she barely knows from the gym!