words in movies
(Joey is bent over at the waist and is looking for something under Monica's bed.)
Joey: (holding a box) Well, remember when they got in that big fight and broke up and we were all stuck in her with no food or anything? Well, when Ross said Rachel at the wedding, I figured it was gonna happen again, so I hid this in here.
Chandler: (looks at what she's holding and shies away) Oh dear God, they gave us glasses!
Monica: No, they gave us glasses with lipstick on them! I mean, if they didn't change the glasses, who knows what else they didn't change. (He glares at her.) Come on sweetie, I just want this weekend to be perfect, I mean we can change rooms, can't we?
Ross: Well, y'know how I'm trying to work things out with Emily. Well, there's this one thing Okay, (Rachel has her back turned to the camera, and Ross isn't looking at her.) here goes. I made a promise that-(they cut to the other camera and Ross notices something coming out of Rachel's nose)-Oh hey!
Chandler: Well, maybe it was the kind of food that tasted good at first but then made everybody vomit and have diarrhea.
Joey: Hey, Mr. Bing. That uh, hotel you stayed at called. Said someone left an eyelash curler in your room.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is sitting on couch and Rachel is getting some coffee. Phoebe keeps turning her head from to keep from looking at Rachel.]
Ross: No, no, it's okay. Really. They're plenty of people who just see their sisters at Thanksgiving and just see their college roommates at reunions and just see Joey at Burger King. So is, is that better?
Rachel: Well, for starters I would've said the right name at my wedding!
Phoebe: Oh hey, Monica, I heard you saw Donald Trump at your convention.
(they all look at Ross)
(They all glare evilly at Phoebe)
Phoebe: (hides her mouth behind the cup and speaks in the "pigeon voice" from before) Coo, again. Don't blame the pretty lady. It was not her fault. It was me, the pigeon, coo! (pause) Seriously, stop staring at her.
(Rachel comes out of her room and starts staring at him unseen)
Phoebe: Im hearing what youre saying, but at our prices everyone needs toner.
Monica: Oh, honey!I can't. I was just telling these guys that things are crazy at the restaurant!
Monica: No, I cant afford this either. No. I-I-Im, Im just to figure out which one I want then Im gonna get it at Kleinmans, this discount place in Brooklyn, day after tomorrow they are having a huge sale.
Joey: Well, at the Christmas party him and Santa did some definitely gay stuff!
(Ross enters and he's really angry. He goes towards Chandler who's sitting at the counter)
Chandler: I'm sorry, he's a little bit wound up, we had to stop at every maple candy stand on the way here.
Earl: Well I only have one thing to do today. (He looks at his board in his office that reads, "Todays Tasks: KILL SELF.") I guess I could push it back.
Ross: At least tell me where you hid it.
Rachel: Hey, so you guys, the funniest thing happened, at work...
Phoebe: Well at least all my songs don't taste like garlic. Yeah, there are other ingredients Monica.
Monica: You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
(he picks up the suitcase, which falls open, revealing all the stuff they have taken from the hotel. The receptionist just looks at them.)
Phoebe: (singing) Food here at 'Javu'..will kill you..the food here at 'Javu' ...will kill you..
Mike: Yes. Yeah and thanks for all the wedding night advice. (walks away) That didn't make me uncomfortable at all! Alright, so I'll see everybody tonight?
Joey: (looks at her for a moment) What the hell are you talking about??
Chandler: I got you something from Vermont! (Sits down at the table)
(Joey and Rachel continue to look at each other in silence for a while)
Monica: Phoebe, it's not what you wear. It's sort of your songs... I just don't think you should play at the restaurant anymore.
Chandler: I could fall asleep at a play.
Joey: I wish I could but I just found out that I have to be at work really early the next day, so I can't go, but, you know, take the extra ticket and invite whoever you want.
(Monica points at Joey, Rachel turns and sees him)
Ross: Oh, no, it's no big deal, I mean, if I weren't doing this I'd just, you know, be at the gym working out.
Joey: Ok, ok! Fine! You can come, but don't tell anybody else. It's up on the roof at 8.
Rachel: Really?! Arent you sweet! I gotta tell you though, I am, I am having the hardest time placing you. Oh-oh hang on! Did we umm, did we fool around at Lance Davis graduation party?
[Scene: Ross, Charlie and Professor Spafford are sitting at the table in a restaurant]
Monica: (to Rachel) Look at you with all the guys!
Ross: What? (turns around to look at Rachel)
Rachel: Hello. (to Gavin) But you know what, hey, new day, new leaf, I am just really really happy ... (sees Gavin staring at Heather) I'm sorry, obviously Heather's ass has something more important to say so I'll just wait 'till it's finished.
Joey: Im just so nervous! Yknow? The callback isnt until tomorrow at five. I feel like my head is going to explode!
Chandler: (looks him in the eye) I'm not breaking up with her! (they stare at each other for a while, then Joey blows in his face)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is looking at the ring he bought and not liking it.]
[Scene: At the counter. Ross is sitting there, drinking. Phoebe approaches him.]
(Rachel just stands there staring at Joey and Charlie in silence. After a while, Ross turns around and sees them.)
Rachel: I don't know why Joey had to kiss her! I mean, of all the girls at the party, GOD!
(Joey and Charlie enter. Ross looks at her)
(Ross and Mike glance at each other then both suddenly turn to Phoebe who is gone. �They sheepishly exchange glances.)
Rachel: No, really. Really, Pheebs, youre not gonna be the one worrying about saving for college, or yelling at them when theyre bad, yknow, or deciding to put them on Ritalin when they just wont calm down. Yknow?
[Scene: At the Spa, Phoebe is at the half-opened door]
Chandler: I'd love to stay, but I have eh... (points at the cup) got a hot date... (starts to leave)
Rachel: (to the cowgirl) And you are so in style right now. Yknow, I work at Ralph Lauren and the whole fall line has got this like equestrian theme going on. I dont suppose you saw the cover of British Vogue, but
Phoebe: Well, you promised me a fun road trip! Weve been on the road six hours and youve been asleep for five and a half! We are switching at the next rest stop and you are going to drive all the way back! That will be your punishment, you greedy sleeper!
(David puts his napkin up to his mouth and starts laughing at his own line. Matt notices him after a while and starts laughing as well.)
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Janice: What, you can do it in the parking lot of a Taco Bell, but you can't do it at a doctor's office?
Charlie: (to Joey) So, I have to go shopping today, which is my least favourite thing, I'm soo bad at picking out clothes!
Charlie: Oh, well, we can go see the Chronos Quartet at the Avery Fisher Hall.
Chandler: (looking at the picture of the female reproductive system) Wow! Fortunately she has a very pretty face!
(Dr. Connelly glares at Chandler)
Chandler: Is that a hint? Because we love you Doctor Connelly but we don't think we'd want you to be our child! (Dr. Connelly glares at him) Wow, talking about an inhospitable environment!
Janice: Oh! Someone's a little cranky today cuz they have to do it in a cup! (laughs) Oh! They gave you the kiddy size (looking at the cup in his hand).
Ross: Wait a minute, you guys. Oh, I wanna ask you something. I-I I may get to speak at this paleontology convention and if I do, I'd love for you guys to come and hear me.
Joey: All right, so. How did it go at the fertility clinic?
(Turns to look at Professor Sherman, only to discover that he is sleeping)
Phoebe: Well normally I dont, but yknow (looks at the TV) Green Bay is playing.
Rachel: (yelling at the stranger) Alright! Enough out of you!
Monica: This would be a beautiful place to get married, yeah, but I wouldnt put the aisle there and I would never have the ceremony there! (Points to both places.) I mean youd have the ceremony under this big beautiful arch. (The arch at the entrance to the room.)
(Zack comes out of the bathroom. They all sit down at the table.)
Ross: Guess who's up for keynote speaker at the National Paleontology Conference?
Phoebe: Oh! I'm sorry Rachel, I don't have time for your childish games, ok? I still have to go find something incredible to wear so I can beat Mike at "who's more over who"! (at which she walks away)
Rachel: (staring at him) Whno, but yknow who did stop in here looking for ya, Tennille.
Ross: (very excited) Look at all these paleontologists!!
WAITER: (with tray and two drinks)� Excuse me.� Um, these are from the two gentlemen at the end of the bar.
(Everyone looks at her)
Monica: At least you took me down with you!
Phoebe: Have you thought about what you would be giving up? You can't move out of the city, what if you want Chinese food at 5am? Or a fake Rolex that breaks as soon as it rains or an Asian hooker sent right to your door?
David: Well, I was probably going to do it at some point.
Phoebe: Sure! Look, ok, bottom line: I love Mike... David! David. I love David. Don't look at me that way, Roseanne Rosannadanna!
Chandler: (at the laptop) Oh, no, no, no dear God, no!
Chandler: Well, you must be pretty mad at yourself right now...!
Chandler: Well, I tried Billy Jean King, but... (Ross glares at him) you know, you and Monica have the same "I'm gonna kill you" look...? I can usually make it go away by kissing her... (Ross continues to glare at him and Chandler leans in as if he's going to kiss Ross)
Rachel: You know, this happens all the time to my computer at work.
Charlie: Oh wait, Joey and I are supposed to have dinner (Looks at Joey).
Chandler: Hey! (Grunts as Ben hits him at full speed.)
Ross: Yes, but I did make a pyramid out of the bath products. This is amazing, thank you, thank you so much. (he leans in, and they look at each other for a moment) That's a pretty necklace.
Chandler: So great things are happening at work and in your personal life!
Rachel: I know, that old lady at the end was ready to take you home.
(David and Phoebe sit down at a table close to Chandler and Monica's)
Phoebe: (smiles at him happily for a few seconds before answering) No!
(the paleontologist glares at Chandler)
Chandler: How can she be great if shes from Poughkeepsie? (laughs, at they all look at him) That joke wouldve killed in Albany.
Ross: Oh, I can't tell you how great it was to look at the crowd and see your face! I mean... uh, did you know you were (giggles) mouthing the words along with me?
(Ross giggles, but Charlie isn't amused at all.)
Joey: (bewildered) Oh! Oh, well! At least we're both having fun!
[Scene: Rachel's hotel room. Joey is standing at the door, facing Rachel]
Phoebe: (looking at Mike) Oh, yeah! (turning to Chandler) Are you telling me you... you're not even... a little turned on by Monica, right now?
Chandler: Tonight?! (looks at the ring) Isn't an engagement ring supposed to have a diamond? (squints at the ring to emphasize how tiny the diamond is) Oh, there it is!
(David produces the ring. At the same time, Mike walks in, behind David)
Rachel: Ooh! You guys are so lucky you are here with people, you known it's such a romantic place. That's all, I just wish I could (looks at Joey who is at the check in desk) share that with a guy.
(They start playing and Chandler does not suck at all)
Monica: Oh, the way you crushed Mike at ping pong was such a turn-on.You wanna...? (plays with her finger on Chandlers chest)
Rachel: (now looking up at the ceiling) That is hard to say, Ross. That is hard to say.
(Phoebe starts to listen at the other wall, where Rachel's room is. There, Joey and Rachel are kissing.)
(They are still listening at the wall, when Ross enters their room)
(Monica and Chandler's room. Phoebe, Monica and Chandler have their ears pressed against the wall, and Joey looks at them)
Chandler: Not quite. Monica's still at the salon, and I'm just finishing packing.
Phoebe: Aaah... you're not good at this...