words in movies
Ross: (picking up the slip of paper) Hello! What's this? Oh right its that girl's phone number. (Rachel ignores him) Yeah-yeah, there it is, just a phone number a really hot girl gave me. (He holds it so that Rachel can see it, she continues to ignore him) It's no big deal, I mean it is her home phone number, but...(Rachel still ignores him) Whoa! (Throws it in her lap) Whoa-whoops, I almost lost this baby! Yeah, the lovely Amanda gives me her number and I-I go and drop it. (He waves it in front of Rachel's face. Then suddenly Phoebe has to sneeze and Rachel quickly grabs the slip of paper and gives it to Phoebe for her to sneeze into.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is telling Monica about his new baby sitting job.]
Monica: (interrupting) You have nothing! You're not even going out! You're her baby sitter! You have a 12-year-old girl's job!
Chandler: Well, its not your fault. What are you gonna do? Not take her to the hospital? Yknow? Youre doing nothing wrong. (Pause) Except for harboring an all consuming love for the woman whose carrying his baby. (He loses his card behind the door.) Richard? If-if youre in there, could you pass me my credit card?
Ross: (talking agitated and angry) Everyone gets a goodbye but me? What have I got to do to get a goodbye, huh? Be best friends with you? Uh, go out with you? Have a baby with you? Oh wait a minute, wait a minute, I did all those things.
DR. BURKE: Ya know, she's having another baby.
Joey: Yeah, we know, but there's a baby suckin' on it.
ROSS: Well, she'll call back, don't be such a baby.
MONICA: I'm not a baby, you're the baby.
ROSS: My baby sister, ladies and gentlemen.
Rachel: Well I was gonna tell him that Im-Im gonna have the baby and he can be as involved as he wants.
Joey: Thank you! Alright, let me see how I'm gonna start... "Dear baby adoption decider people..."
JOEY: Hi, here's the deal. We lost a carseat on a bus today. It's white plastic, with a handle, and it fits onto a stroller. Oh, and there was a baby in it. He wants to talk to you again.
Rachel: I don't know. It's so complicated. I work with this guy, you know, I have the baby, and I have Ross, and I just...I don'tknow what to do and I have to be at the office and see Gavin in ten minutes.
Rachel: You are the official baby crier stopper!
MONICA: Oh my God, I can't believe what I'm getting ready to say. I wanna have a baby, but I don't wanna have one with someone who doesn't really wanna have one.
Alice: No-no-no, no, its going to be fine. Because umm, because I teach Home Ec, and uh, I can have 30 kids making baby clothes all year long. Yknow itll-itll be like my very own little sweatshop.
MONICA: Well, I just think the baby would keep falling off the dog. Do you, uh, do you , do you not see kids in our future.
Janice: I just came by to give you a kiss, I have to go pick up the baby, so. I'll see you later sweetheart, you too Chandler. (laughs)
Chandler: Jeez, what a baby.
Rachel: Well, you more then me, but he cant stay to mad at me. I mean, I just had his baby.
Chandler: I just think that things would go a lot smoother if we each have our own zone. Phoebe, you can be in charge of wiping. And yknow Mon, you can be in charge of diapering and I can be in charge of looking how cute they are when they put their hands around (He degrades into baby talk, but he means when they grab his finger.)
Monica: I'm talking about me having a baby.
Dr. Green: This where they put it? What, there no table available in the kitchen! Hello, baby.
Joey: No room? Its a baby. Its like this big. (Holds his hands about a foot apart.) Yknow, I mean you-you could you could put it over here. (A desk.) Or-or-or we could put it right here. (The chair.) Aw, its cute, right? Or-or we could put it over here. (By the bathroom door.) You wouldnt even notice it. Wheres the baby? (Mumbles that its over in the corner.)
Joey: Come on baby, come on!
Chandler: Yeah, baby!
Ross: ...and these come in the shapes of your favourite Christmas characters, Santa, Rudolph, and Baby Jesus.
Julio: The Empty Vase is not about you. My baby, you make me so sad that you would think this.
Dr. Green: Baby. Ross.
Ross: No, it's just...you know the whole "getting on with your life" thing. Well, do I have to? I mean, I'm sitting here with this cute woman, and, and, and she's perfectly nice, and, but that there's, that's it. And um, and then I'm here talkin' to you, and, and it's easy, and it's fun, and, and I don't, I don't have to...You know, here's a wacky thought. Um, what's say you and I give it another shot? No no no, I know what you're gonna say, you're a lesbian. But what do you say we just put that aside for now you know? Let's just stick a pin in it, ok? Because, we're great together, you know. You can't deny it. Besides, you're carrying my baby. I mean, how perfect is that? But see, you know, you keep sayin' that, but there's somethin' right here. I love you.
Joey: Oh, well no problem there. (He picks up the chick, hugs it really tight, and talks to it like its a little baby.)
Joey: Come on baby, dont go. Please? What do you say?
RYAN: Hey baby, I'm back... [Phoebe is sitting by the window in a veil.]
Monica: It took me 28 years to find one man that I wanna spend my life with, if I have to wait another 28 years then, I'll be 56 before I can have a baby, and that's just stupid.
Chandler: Me too. I wanna find a baby that needs a home and I wanna raise it with you. And I wanna mess it up in our own specific way.
Rachel: Oh mom, I swear Im not an idiot. Ive read all kinds of books on pregnancy and giving birth, but I-I just didnt think to read the part about what to do when the baby comes. And-and then guess what? The babys coming and I dont know what to do. Oh, can I throw up in my diaper genie?
Phoebe: No, Im really okay with this. Yknow why? Cause look at them, and I made that, so I know its gonna be like a million times harder to give up a baby but, oh my God, its gonna feel like a million times better, right? I wanna do this. (To Frank and Alice) I wanna carry your baby.
Joey: Come on baby, dont go. Please? What do you say?
Rachel: (interrupting him) Hi! Im gal pal Rachel Green, and if you want the dirt, Im the one you come too. This might be Joeys baby (rubbing her stomach), who knows? Im just kiddingSeriously, (leans into the cassette recorder Shelley is using) gal pal Rachel Green.
Chandler: Noo! (takes him out) Oh, its okay, its okay, baby, baby, baby.
Monica: I know this is going to sound unbelievably selfish, but, were you planning on bringing up the whole baby/lesbian thing? Because I think it might take some of the heat off me.
Joey: (jumping up in a hole that he is digging, he is shoulder deep) Hey, you guys! Take a look at this! (Chandler and Monica jump up and go over to the hole.) Check this baby out, dug me a hole!
Ross: Okay. (He leans in to kiss her again, but she leans back preventing him from making contact.) Wow, its-its 5:30 in the morning. (Rachel laughs) So, Id better get cracking on this baby.
Chandler: Okay. (He opens it and its a baby chick) Its a chicken.
Joey: Hey, wouldn't be cool if our duck and chick had a little baby? We could call it Chuck.
Phoebe: Okay, umm, if a kid gets straight As, his parents would say, "Yeah, he pulled a Monica." Y'know? Or a fireman saves a baby, and they go, "Yeah I know, he pulled a Monica." Or someone hits a homerun and the announcer says, "Yeah, that ones outta here." Though some things dont change.
Chandler: You can always sell your baby.
Frank: MY SISTERS GONNA HAVE MY BABY!!!!!!!
Anchorwoman: (on TV) While most of us think of chocolate bunnies and baskets as traditional Easter gifts. Some people insist on giving live chicks as presents. (Joey is intrigued by the idea) Unfortunately, the sad fact remains that most of these little guys wont live to see the fourth of July. (Joey starts to call a place to buy a little baby chick) Because of as a result of improper care, they will be dead.
Chandler: Well believe it baby!
Rachel: Yeah, honey, maybe you can talk to somebody whos had a baby. Like your mom?
Phoebe: Okay, but this cant be good for the baby.
Phoebe: You guys! You guys! Youre gonna have a baby! Theyre gonna have a baby!
Phoebe: Oh, poor baby.
Phoebe: It kicked! I think the baby kicked!
Ross: We are having a baby together, but were not involved. (The cashier, a very beautiful woman, looks confused) I mean, uh we-we were seeing each other a while ago, but then we were just friends. And then there was one drunken night. (Rachel looks at him angrily) Or, yes stranger, wed like this delivered please.
Phoebe: Ha-ha, its not my baby, ha-ha-ha! (He leaves.)
Phoebe: Oh my God!! The baby just kicked!
Phoebe: I cant help it. I need the meat. The baby needs the meat.
Joey: Well, suppose until the babys born I laid off it. No extra animals would die, you-youd just be eating my animals.
Rachel: No-n-n-n-no! I am finally thinking clearly. My lucky dress wasnt working out to well for me, but for four years, this baby never missed.
Joey: (He starts looking longingly at the sandwich.) Oh mama! Uh when-when is the baby due?
Phoebe: You got problems because of you! Not your name! All right, this has got to stop! Chandler is a great name! In factyes, (To Joey) Im, Im sorry. I know you really wanted me to name the baby Joey, but eh, so, Im-Im, Im gonna, Im gonna name the baby Chandler.
Phoebe: No! No! I-I meant for the baby!
Phoebe: And! And, theyre gonna have a baby! (The gang is shocked.) And! And, they want me to grow it for them in my uterus. (The gang is stunned into silence.)
Chandler: Hey! Do we have a baby name yet?
Joey: Ohh! (Realises it was all a trick to get Phoebe to name the baby Chandler.)
Alice: (laughs) No. No. No. (Sits down.) Okay, now, see, I wanna name the girl baby Leslie, and Frank wants to name one of the boy babies Frank JR. JR.
Chandler: Yeah baby!
Joey: Yeah, they do! Quit being a baby and leave me alone! There, youve just had your first class!
Rachel: Oh, yeah, well Yeah, no use wasting this baby, just lyin around the house.
Joey: Baby shower. Wow! That sounds sooo like something I dont want to do! Later! (Finally, he makes his exit.)
Monica: The baby shower for Phoebe!
Rachel: Oh my God! We are throwing the most depressing baby shower ever!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebes baby shower, she is holding those leather pants, and isnt happy about it.]
Monica: Wait, you cant have the baby here! I mean I havent sterilised it since the guys moved out!
Chandler: What a baby.
Joey: London baby!! (And Rachel slowly closes the door, sadly.)
Joey: Its London, baby! All right, the hotels here. (Points to the map.) Wait. No, we wanna go No. I know. (Sets the map down.) Im gonna have to go into the map. (So Joey literally steps into the map.)
Ross: Yknow we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby thats half human and half pure evil!
Joey: Thats Fergie baby!!
Chandler: Tickets please! (Rachel hands over the tickets) Thats courtside baby!
Chandler: Yeah baby!
Phoebe Sr: Well, because youd be giving up a baby, and I-I really dontI dont know if theres anything I can say that could make you understand the pain of giving up a baby. So, umm, (Picks up a puppy in the box next to the couch.)
Joey: (louder) London baby!!
Joey: London baby!
Phoebe: I may play the fool at times, but Im a little more than a pretty blond girl with an ass that wont quit. (She takes the sweater out of her purse.) I believe this belongs to the father of your baby.
Monica: Okay, look at this one. This is my favourite. (Its a little pink and white dress for the girl baby.)
Monica: Well, because you signed it baby kangaroo Tribbiani (Joey makes a 'and-what’s-wrong-with-that' look). Hey, why don’t you stop worrying about sounding smart and just be yourself!
Joey: (on phone) Yeah, hi. You guys got any of those baby chicks? Cause I was watching this ah, commercial on TV and man, those guys are cute!
The Cigarette Smoking Guy: (No, not the Cigarette Smoking Man from The X-Files.) Well, maybe you and your baby should go to another strip club.
Phoebe: I already had a baby. Leave me alone.
Phoebe: Atlantic City, baby! Let's roll some bones! Hey Joey, high-five for rolling bones!
Rachel: (Resenting the truth) I am not a baby! You know what? I swear to god, just because you get so uptight every time we...
Monica: Nope, sound like me. Pheebs, its going great. Look at Chandler with little baby girl Chandler.
Monica: I do not have baby fever!
Chandler: Yes! You want babies! You have baby fever!
Joey: You just give him a spoon baby!
Dr. Harad: All right. Here's your first baby.
Joey: That's right baby.
[Scene: Lamaze class, Ross is again on the floor, cradled in Susans lap, but now Carol is cradled in his lap, and she has a pretend baby, on her lap. The teacher is showing her class a video, which is about to end.]
Chandler: All right, great, road trip baby! (To Monica) This okay with you?