words in movies
Monica: Ah, well if you dont clear this off, you wont be getting one of those from me. But Bens coming over here tomorrow to play this game, this cant be there.
Monica: But Ben is coming over tonight and he cant see this.
(At this point a stream of obscenities burst forth from Phoebes mouth just in time for Ben and Ross to enter and hear most of it, and in slow motion Ross tries to shield his innocent son from Phoebes vulgarity.)
Phoebe: Oh hi BenNo!! Dont look at the machine! (Covers the screen.)
Ross: (Pause) Yeah I am! Yeah, Ben got a second audition!
[Scene: Ben and Joey's (Isn't that an ice cream??) callback.]
Joey: I just said that so you wouldn't let Ben do it! Look Ross, if anyone should step aside it should be Ben!
Carol: Joey, Ross is gonna be here any second, would you mind watching Ben for me while I use the ladies' room?
Ross: (angrily) Ben! (Pause.) (Happily.) I mean, Ben! Ben!
The Casting Director: (entering) Okay uh, we have narrowed it down to Raymond, Ben, Kyle, and Joey. The rest of you, thank you very much.
Ross: Maybe I should get another pair! Ooh, y'know, they-they had some with fringe all down the sides. (Chandler starts rubbing his temple again.) I'm gonna go kiss Ben goodnight. (He starts to head for Monica's bedroom.) I can't believe he thinks I'm a cowboy. (Pause.) I would make a good cowboy. (He struts into Monica's room.)
Carol: Guess what? Ben is going to be in a TV commercial!
Ross: All right, I gotta go. I'm taking Ben to the park.
[Scene: Ben's audition, Carol, Ross, and Ben along with about 10 more families are in a waiting room as Joey enters happily.]
Monica: See? Ben doesn't think you're a loser, he thinks you're a cowboy! Now that's something.
Ross: I know, it's crazy! We were just pushing Ben on the swings
Emily: If anyone asks, well just say Ben addressed them. (Looking through the envelopes.) Oh! So you invited Rachel then?
Ross: (to the guys) I gotta go make a fake Ben.
Ross: Because, because Ive got Ben.
Ben: (entering) Dad!! (Runs and hugs him.)
Ross: Ben, say hi to Aunt Monica. (He holds the phone to the fake Ben he has created out of a pumpkin.) Oh, I guess he doesnt feel like talking right now. Hes smiling though! Okay, talk to you later.
Ross: Chandler, what kind of an idiot do you take me for? (As he picks up the fake Ben.)
Ben: That you and daddy were not on a break.
Ben: (yelling from off camera) Crap!!
Joey: (quietly) Ive got Ben.
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Rachel is talking with Ben.]
Ben: No more pranks.
Ben: Yay! (Runs off.)
Ross: Yeah? Well, I-I think Bens asleep.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Ross: All right, thats it! (He runs over to Ben, but he runs past him and out the door.) Comeyouno! You are in big trouble young man!
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
Rachel: Ohhh! Well of course I will watch him! We have fun, dont we Ben? (He nods yes.)
Ross: What? (She takes the sign off and hands it to him.) Thats great. That is great. (Crumples up the paper and throws it down in anger.) What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
Ben: What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
[Cut to the hallway, Ben runs upstairs with Ross in pursuit.]
Ross: Wait! No! Ben, come here! I am not kidding!
Ben: (on the bike) Im ready!
Ross: Yeah, well my-my ex-wife and I share custody of Ben and umm, uh, and just so you know, Carol and I are on excellent terms as Im sure you are with your wife! (Realizes) Oh, Im sorry! (To Elizabeth) Its unbelievable!
[Scene: Central Park, Ross is teaching Ben how to ride a bike. Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are they also.]
Ben: Uh-huh!
Ben: (To Chandler) Thanks daddy.
Ben: No.
Monica: Matt Guire, Mark Lynn, Ben Wire
Ross: (Thinking it over) Sure! (Takes one) Hey, I just found out, I get Ben for the holidays this year.
Rachel: You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.
Ben: (singing) Jingle bells, jingle bells...
Ben: No Santa? Was I bad?
Ross: No! Oh, no-no-no. Hey, you weren't bad, you've been very good, Ben.
Ben: Christmas eve.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is whirling Ben around.]
Ben: Santa has reindeers that can fly!
Ben: Christmas.
Ross: Well, I do, so let's... (Ben and Ross sit down on the couch) So, Ben, you uh, you know what holiday is coming up, don't ya?
Ross: Yes, but also (Pauses to let Ben answer, but he doesnt.) Hanukkah! See, you're part Jewish, and-and Hanukkah is a Jewish holiday.
Ben: When is Santa coming?
Ben: So Santa's coming?
Ben: Santa's mad at me.
Ben: Cool!
Ben: (singing) Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer...
Monica: Come on Ben.
Ben: Texas?
Ross: You're welcome, Ben. Merry Christmas, ooh, and Happy Hanukkah!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just opened the door for Ross who is costumed as an Armadillo. Ben is standing next to her.]
Ben: No! Why does he have to go?
Ben: Okay, Santa!
Ben: No! Why can't the Armadillo leave? I want Santa!
Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
Chandler: Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here, weird turtle-man?
Ben: Did you bring me any presents, Santa?
Chandler: Hey! (Grunts as Ben hits him at full speed.)
[Ross turns around and walks back to Ben.]
Ross: Okay Ben, Santa has to go. Say good-bye!
Ross: That's right, Ben. I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico! But, Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben. (He tries to bend down to pick up the bag with the presents, but can't because of the costume) Maybe the Lady will help me with these presents.
Ben: (answering him) Eight whole days.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Santa (Chandler), Superman (Joey), Ben, and Monica are listening to the Holiday Armadillo (Ross) finish telling the story of Hanukkah.]
Ben: Awesome!
Ben: Wow! Thanks!
Ben: Santa! (Runs to Chandler and hugs him)
[Monica and Ben sit down on the couch.]
Ross: Thats right! Wait no, Ben.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe is watching Bert and Ernie with Ben.]
Rachel: Ben, its Rachel! (He closes the door.) But whatever.
Rachel: Hi! Hi Ben!
Ben: (running to the bathroom) Thanks Phoebe!
(Ben starts to go, but Ross stops him.)
Ben: Hi.
Ross: (to Ben) Okay! All clear!
Ben: Ill be okay.
Ross: (to Ben) Everything okay in there?
Ben: Dont talk to me now!
Ross: Well, Ben would be there.
Ben: Not really.
Ben: Bye dad.
Ben: Okay.
Ben: Whats a virgin?
Ben: Im not allowed to have soda.
Ben: Yeah, youre funny.
Ben: Really? Like how?
Ben: Cause you guys were on a break.
Ben: But youre not anymore!
Rachel: Ben yknow when uh, when you were a baby, you and I used to hang out all the time. Cause I was, I was your daddys girlfriend.
Ben: (laughs) Thats a good one.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I-I-Im funny Ben, but Im not stupid. Okay?