words in movies
[at Ross's. Carol and Susan are picking Ben up]
CAROL: So how did everything go?
CAROL: Well, we've gotta go.
CAROL: Oh, right. Um, I've got some news. It's about us.
CAROL: Uh, no, Susan and me.
CAROL: We're uh, we're getting married.
CAROL: Anyway, we'd like you to come, but we totally understand if you don't want to.
CAROL: Look I just thought that...
CAROL: Want us to go?
MONICA: Yes! Carol and Susan's caterer had a mountain bike accident this weekend, and she's in a full body cast.
MONICA: All right, look, Ross. I realize that you have issues with Carol and Susan, and I feel for you, I do. But if you don't help me cook, I'm gonna take a bunch of those little hot dogs, and I'm gonna create a new appetizer called "pigs in Ross". All right, ball the melon.
CAROL: How's it going?
CAROL: Fine, whatever.
CAROL: Nothing. Ok, everything. I think we're calling off the wedding.
ROSS: Carol, what's the matter? What happened?
CAROL: My parents called this afternoon to say they weren't coming.
CAROL: I mean, I knew they were having trouble with this whole thing, but they're my parents. They're supposed to give me away and everything.
CAROL: And then Susan and I got in this big fight because I said maybe we should call off the wedding, and she said we weren't doing it for them, we were doing it for us, and if I couldn't see that, then maybe we should call off the wedding. I don't know what to do.
CAROL: You do?
CAROL: Of course I do.
CAROL: You're right. Of course you're right.
CAROL: We're back on.
[Monica pushes Ben down the aisle in a stroller. Susan is escorted by both her parents. Carol is escorted by Ross.]
CAROL: Thank you.
CAROL: Ross. [He lets her go]
MINISTER: You know, nothing makes God happier than when two people, any two people, come together in love. Friends, family, we're gathered here today to join Carol and Susan in holy matrimony.
[At the reception, Monica and Ross watch Carol and Susan getting their picture taken.]
[They dance; Carol looks on lovingly.]
[Scene: Carol and Susan's, there's a knock on the door and Carol answers it to Ross.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are showing off Ben to the gang.]
Ross: Carol?
Carol: I guess so. (Carol starts to breast feed Ben.)
Carol: Sure.
Carol: As much as he needs.
Ross: Carol, we've been through this before, ok? We have a good time. We laugh, we play. It's like we're father and son.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol is dropping Ben off for Ross to watch.]
Carol: Why'd you freak out?
Carol: How did we do?
Carol: My breast milk is gross?
Carol: Ross, you're being silly. I've tried it, it's no big deal. Just taste it. (Holding out a bottle.)
CAROL: [enters with Susan] Hello
CAROL: Hi honey.
CAROL: What?
Carol: (noticing a kid who has picked up a copy of Variety to read) Hey, that kid looks familiar.
CAROL: Uhh, we know, he already did it last week.
Monica: Carol called me to thank me for the lasagna, I asked, she told me.
CAROL and SUSAN: Great. That would be fine.
Carol: Ok, and this is Funny Clown. Funny Clown is only for after his naps, not before his naps or he won't sleep.
CAROL and SUSAN: We love you. Buy.
[Scene: The hospital, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are in the waiting room, waiting for Carol and Susan to arrive.]
Ross: Let me see, I gotta see, I gotta see. Oh, a head. Oh, it's, it's huge. Carol, how are you doing this?
ROSS: I got some, uh, hers and hers towels for Susan and Carol. And, uh, I got this blouse for mom.
Ross: That does not sound stupid to me. You know, it's like the first time I had to make dinner for myself, after Carol left me? (the buzzer on the washer goes off) I'm sorry, that's all the time we have. Next on Ross...(opens up the washer) Uh-oh.
CAROL: We've got a cab waiting downstairs.
Ross: Uh-huh, Carol, so were we. All right, just-just imagine for a moment, Susan meets someone and-and they really hit it off. Yknow? Say-say theyre coming back from the theatre, and they-they stop at a pub for a couple of drinks, theyre laughing, yknow, someone innocently touches someone else Theres electricity, its new. Its exciting. Are you telling me there isnt even the slightest possibility of something happening?
CAROL: Mommy is so proud of you. Hi. Hi.
CAROL: It's us.
CAROL: What did he say?
CAROL: Hi.
CAROL: Tuesday.
CAROL: Hi.
CAROL: Hi.
CAROL: Hi.
Carol: All you need is a woman who likes men and you'll be set.
CAROL and SUSAN: Hello.
Carol: Oh, I love them. Each one's like a little party in my uterus.
Ross: No, no, Carol. There's nothing wrong with it. I just, I just don't think breast milk is for adults.
Carol and Susan: (entering) Hey!!
Rachel: Uh, honey, yeah that was with Carol.
Ross: Yeah, see Mon, listen, listen. When Carol and I broke up, I went through the same thing. And you know what I did?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are picking up Ben, while Monica is pouring chocolate syrup, lots of it, into her ice cream.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are dropping off Ben]
Carol: G. I. Joe. G. I. Joe?!
Carol: Oh please God, let there be a song.
CAROL: Think I better go before mommy starts weeping.
Ross: I have to go. Yeah, Carol should be home by now, soo...
Ross: (sets out a bunch of shot glasses and starts to poor himself a drink, many drinks) Im an idiot. I mean shoulda seen it, I mean Carol and Id be out and shed, shed see some beautiful woman, and, and shed be Ross y'know look at her, and Id think, God, my wife is cool!
Carol: Ben. Ben. Ben's good. How come you never mentioned Ben before?
Ross: Cause Carols a lesbian. (Phoebe is shocked) And, and Im not one. And apparently its not a mix and match situation.
Carol: It did at first, but not anymore.
Ross: (looking at the page) 717? (to Carol) Wheres 717? (He gets up to return the page, Carol starts to take the last of the food into the kitchen, but Ross grabs the last piece.) Hey, youve have more of these for Susan right?
Carol: Oh, great! Me too.
Carol: Y'know what, I want to talk to you about this so much, but we should probably do it when we could really get into it, are you free for dinner tomorrow night?
Carol: Hey, what are you doing here?
Carol: (answering the door) Hi!
Carol: Hes sleeping.
Carol: Sooo!! Anyway...
Carol: Oh God, Ross I am so sorry.
Carol: Its not that kind of anniversary.
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Ross is eating the dinner Carol made for Susan.]
Carol: (on phone) Phoebe hang on a second Ross wants to say something. (listens) What? (listens) (to Ross) You slept with someone else?!
Carol: You slept with another woman?
CAROL: Actually, he is getting closer on the talking thing. He can't quite say mama yet, but once he said yumen.
Phoebe: Yeah! Lets do that!! That-that sounds good. We should sit down and talk, just me, my lover Carol, and the Stings. Umm, how-how will I get in touch with them?
Carol: Ahh, nooo!!
Carol: Youre a genius, Ross.
Carol: (looking through the peephole) Ugh. (opening the door) Ross!
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Carol is running to answer the door.]
Carol: Yeah, okay, bye. (closes the door, turns out the lights, and runs back to the bedroom)
Carol: Okay, bye!!
Carol: Okay, Ill pay you tomorrow. (pushes him out the door)
Chandler: What? There was ice there that night with Carol? Plastic seats? Four thousand angry Pittsburgh fans?
Carol: Ah, Susan will be so pleased.
Carol: No. But its okay, Ill just put out pickles or something.
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Carol is setting a romantic dinner for Susan as there is a knock on the door.]
Carol: Umm, yeah, actually, Susans gonna be home any minute, its kinda an anniversary.
Carol: So, I got the results of the amnio today.
Carol: He picked it out of the toy store himself, he loves it.
Carol: (screaming at Ross) Oh, what do you know? No one's going up to you and saying, "Hi, is that your nostril? Mind if we push this pot roast through it?"
Carol: (straining) Not.... helping!
Carol: This doesn't have anything to do with the fact that he is being raised by two women, does it?
ROSS: Well, I just spoke to Carol. Ben's got the chicken pox.
Carol: (irked) Where have you been?
Ross: How do you know? I mean we thought Carol was straight before I married her!
Carol: Ohh, yknow, Susans gonna be shooting a commercial in London next week.
Carol: (knocking on the door) Ross!
Emily: Thats Carol with your son!
Phoebe: Wow, Carol really messed you up!
Carol: Yes!
Carol: Whats too much fun?
Carol: Hey, Ben! Hey!
Carol: Hey! Hows Ben?
Carol: Oh my God, you are so paranoid!
Carol: Maybe.
Carol: Ooh, yeah! She said shes having sooo much fun with Emily.
Ross: No, it's for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever I am. I mean, all she has to do is to dial 55-JIMBO.
Carol: I was gonna say
Ross: (To Carol) No tongue. (And gives her the thumbs up.)