words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, everyone except Ross is decorating the tree.]
Chandler: Let me ask you, why is everybody using these tiny lights nowadays? I remember when people used to use big lights.
Chandler: I dunno what it is, it just doesnt quite feel like Christmas to me.
Chandler: See now it feels like Christmas!
Chandler: Hey Joe whats up?
Chandler: I can see why thats hard to resist.
Chandler: You are aware that shes not a monkey, right?
Chandler: Ah, youre still just a little fat girl inside arent you? (He kisses her on the cheek)
Chandler: What, what are you laughing at?
Chandler: I dont think so.
Chandler: (To Rachel) Oh my God!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, Chandler is there. Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
Chandler: I can save you time ladies, Im right here.
Phoebe: Yeah, Chandler why dont you take a walk? This doesnt concern you.
Chandler: What? Thats terrible!
Chandler: Oh well, that makes it not terrible.
Chandler: No not okay, you cant look for Monicas presents!
Chandler: No, you dont have to, and you cant because I live here too.
Chandler: Why?
Rachel: Chandler, arent you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
Chandler: No, I have a great idea for a present for her.
Phoebe: Oh, thats it? (Mimics Chandler) A great idea!
Rachel: Chandler, thats not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And youve just gotten her one great present? I mean thats just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
Chandler: If I help, we can find em faster!
Rachel: (Reading) Dear losers, do you really think Id hide presents under the couch? P.S. Chandler, I knew theyd break you.
Chandler: Yknow when you guys said you were gonna go across the hall and look, you dont, you dont do that every year do you?
Chandler: You dont, like go into the back of my closet, and look under my gym bag or anything?
Chandler: Because thats where Joey gave me some stuff to store that Ive never seen before in my life! Okay, that did not just happen! (He does a weird clicky motion with his fingers, that kinda hard to describe.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment, Phoebe and Rachel are there and Chandler enters.]
Chandler: I couldn't find anything at Joey--Hey-hey, oh hey!
Chandler: Those are my gifts, I got them for you.
Phoebe: Ohhh. Thanks Chandler they're great!
Rachel: Well Chandler, what is this very weird, metal A Z thing?
Chandler: Those are book ends! That's a great gift!
Chandler: Make sure you put all that stuff back in the closet, okay?
(Chandler does the weird clicky thing again.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, Chandler and Rachel are there, and Phoebe enters with the Chick and the Duck.]
Chandler: Oh, hey guys!
Chandler: Yes, if the presents are hidden south for the winter.
Chandler: Oh, the duck seems to think that Monica got me garbage! Hmm, I wonder what I could get Monica thats as good as garbage?
Chandler: What?
Phoebe: Oh, this ones for Chandler. Here.
Chandler: Oh great!
Chandler: Okay! Okay! Okay!
Chandler: Wait, we cant do this.
Chandler: I dont wanna know what Monica got me. Yknow? I mean, look, Im sure she worked really hard at getting you a present, and wanting to surprise me, and you guys are gonna ruin that, and I, look we have to put these back, this is not what Christmas is about.
Chandler: Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I dont know about you guys, but I wanna see the look on Monicas face when I give her my present, and Im sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just, can we put them back?
Chandler: Fine!
Monica: Hey guys! You found the presents? Chandler, you let them find the presents? Great! Do you know how long it took me to find you that water purifier?
Chandler: Thats what you got me?
Chandler: Now you do that, youre on TV.
Chandler: Youre coming on to the entire room! (He goes over to pick up a stack of magazines next to her, and to get her attention, he throws them back down.) Im Chandler.
Chandler: Hey, that monkey's got a Ross on its ass!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross is lamenting to Chandler and Rachel about his troubles in his new building.]
Chandler: (To Rachel) Sounds like a fun party.
Chandler: Yeah, so, what's that supposed to mean?!
Rachel: Umm, Chandler, you do realize that those ideas are probably already in Monica's head.
Chandler: Okay. It's not different at all, is it?
Chandler: Hmm.
Monica: Couldn't you just stay like this forever? (His eyes snap open.) Chandler! Couldn't you just stay here forever?
Chandler: What?!
Chandler: I'm just hanging out. Y'know, having fun. Y'know with the girl that I'm seeing casually.
Chandler: Well, you do want all that stuff, right?
Chandler: Well, I did not know that.
Chandler: By me?
Chandler: I asked myself that very question, sir. Uh, (Points to Monica) this is Monica. (Points to his boss.) This is my boss, Doug. Doug this is Monica.
Chandler: Monica. (Goes to talk to her.)
Chandler: Just tell me what I need to do to make things right.
Chandler: Well, that's what we do. Y'know, I-I mess up and then you tell me how to fix it and then I do and then y'know you think I'm all cute again.
Chandler: Yes! You want babies! You have baby fever!
(Chandler turns to watch her go and then sees Ross and Joey both with huge grimaces on their faces.)
Joey: Okay, now uh, in terms of the invite list, Ive got you, me, and Chandler and Im gonna invite Gunther cause, well, weve been talking about this pretty loud.
Chandler: It's gonna be okay, right? I mean she's not gonna leave me? This is, this is fixable.
Chandler: Where's Monica?! Where is she? I need to talk to her! It's urgent! Is she here?
Chandler: Bad London! (Takes a spoon and smacks the turkey.)
Chandler: Wh-wh-why?!
Chandler: Will you marry me?
Chandler: Are you okay? I'm so sorry, he wouldn't leave. He kept asking me about chicken.
Chandler: I need to talk to you, it's urgent!
Monica: Chandler.
Chandler: (getting out a ring box) Monica
Chandler: I'm doing this because I'm sorry?
Monica: Chandler, why are you doing this?
Chandler: I don't know. But I know I'm not afraid to do this.
Chandler: I didn't think I was!
Chandler: Yeah I know, but I was really confused and then I talked to these guys. (Turns to look at Ross and Joey.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Chandler are entering after the play. Phoebe and Joey are already there.]
Chandler: Okay, how long is this going to go on.
Rachel: Oh no wait Pheebs, I think for something like that you just ask them to move in with you. But I'm not sure, Chandler?
Chandler: That's not funny.
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: Okay, I've been doing a lot of thinking about us, y'know a lot of uhh, us thinking. And uh, well I guess there's only one-one way to do this. (He slowly and awkwardly gets down on one knee.)
Chandler and Monica: Okay.
Monica: Anyway, were really excited about our wedding plans, and well I guess pretty soon well be making a big withdrawal from the Monica wedding fund. (Chandler and her laugh, but her parents dont.) What?
Chandler: Absolutely! Yknow, because touchie can mean both ass and good worker.
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: Great! Now, we can go to the Ranger game! (Pause) Last night!
CHANDLER: It's about cutting my people a little slack, ya know, for morale. Look, if you wanna see some rough numbers, I can get them to you by Wednesday.
CHANDLER: All right, call it in the air.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is watching Yasmein Bleeth running on TV, and the duck starts quacking.]
Monica: See Chandler? Im getting a lot of use out of them already! Theyre very practical. See, you can wear them with dresses, with skirts, with pants
Chandler: He could be alone. This morning I heard him do push-ups, and then talk to his triceps.
Chandler: Hi, Joe.
Chandler: Well there you have it!
Monica: Or, it could mean that-that you saw Chandler and me together and we y'know were being close and stuff and then you just want to have that with someone too.
Chandler: Joey, look, are you attracted to Monica? Right here, right now, are you attracted to her?
Chandler: All right, look, look. What did... what did you get for Angela Delveccio for her birthday?
Chandler: Oh yeah, it's actually in my bedroom.
Chandler: Yeah, big zero gravity moon steps.
Joey: Well, the reason I think Monica and Chandler are so great
Chandler: (entering) Hey!
Chandler: Okay.
Ross: Come on, Chandler.
Chandler: (looking at the sketch) Oh, I see. I thought you just really, really liked your new couch.
Ross: Chandler?! You brought Chandler?! The next best thing would be Monica!
Chandler: Yeah.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Monica, Rachel, and the guys are watching Days of Our Lives.]
(Chandler and Ross head for opposite ends of the couch.)
Chandler: Okay, I don't think we can turn anymore!
(Chandler has moved forward and is now underneath the couch as it heads up the first set of stairs.)
Chandler: Okay, yeah, I think it's really stuck now.
Chandler: Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!!
Chandler: Okay, but impersonating a police officer is a serious thing. You could get arrested.
Chandler: Oh, y'know, what did you mean when you said pivot?
Chandler and Rachel: You think?!
Chandler: (stopping him) Hey, whoa-whoa! What's she like?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Chandler and Joey are there looking at pictures from the trip to London.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is returning and finds Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
Chandler: Ooh, I do! I do! I do!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Phoebe, Joey, and Chandler are recovering from Ross's rebuke.]
Chandler and Joey: Nice!
Phoebe: (entering, hurridly) Hey, you guys! Look what I found! Look at this! (She hands Chandler a picture) Thats my Moms writing! Look.
Phoebe: Umm Wow, all right. (Checks the book.) Wow! Yay! Ooh, Im gonna meet a guy! And really soon! And hes gonna be the man of my dreams. Probably not the guy I had a dream about last night. (Points at Chandler.)
Chandler: Ooh! Israeli champagne. And it's vanilla!
Chandler: (To Rachel) He has a gun!
CHANDLER: Yeah, and someday when you're ready, you'll make it past the hedges.
Joey: (sheepishly) I finished my book. (Chandler and Monica slowly retreat back to bed.)
Phoebe: Let's just say, I'm glad I'm not Chandler.
Chandler: I would have to say that is an 'L'-shaped bracket.
Chandler: That's kind of a masculine name, don't you think?
Rachel: (to Chandler) O-o-o-okay, how did it go? Tell me everything.
Phoebe: So-so how long did that last for you and Chandler?
Chandler: So what happened?
Chandler: Oh hey, how'd the interview go?
Chandler: No. No. Actually I forgot, what is the deal with that again?
Chandler: No, the best reason to get married is pregnancy. Sorry is pretty much fourth y'know, behind being ready and actually wanting to get married. (Laughs.) Will you be my wife?
Rachel: Thanks Chandler.
Chandler: Our adoption social worker is coming by today so we are cleaning the apartment.
Chandler: Well you coulda tried, not kissing him.
Chandler: Come on, Rach.
Joey: Yeah! (Chandler makes a noise) No?