words in movies
[Scene: A Restaurant, Rachel and Phoebe are having dinner with Dr. Green, and everyone is looking at the menu.]
Dr. Green: How about I order everyone the Moroccan chicken?
Dr. Green: Its chicken.
Dr. Green: Ill never understand you lesbians. (To Rachel) So baby, tell me what is new with you.
Dr. Green: 74?! I ordered the 75! Thats a magnificent wine! The 74 is sewage! Why would you bring me sewage?! (The waiters dumbfounded) Is that a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why youre a waiter?
Dr. Green: Oh come on! Dont be such a baby! (Goes after him)
Rachel: Hey, that is the babys problem. (Dr. Green returns.) Oh, everything okay with the waiter?
Dr. Green: I have no idea, I went to the bathroom. So sweetie, you were starting to tell me what is uh, what is new with you.
Dr. Green: Whats TiVo?
Dr. Green: Are you really pregnant?
Dr. Green: Who is the father? Oh no! Please dont tell me its her! (Points at Phoebe.)
Dr. Green: Thats true.
Dr. Green: (laughs) Poppy. (To Phoebe) Oh, Im gonna be a poppy. (Stops laughing) So when is the wedding?
Dr. Green: The wedding! Theres going to be a wedding. Young lady, dont you sit there and tell me my first grandchild is going to be a bastard! (Rachel pauses) Rachel Karen Green, tell me there is gonna be a wedding!!
(Dr. Green exhales in relief.)
[Scene: The Restaurant, dinner has ended and Phoebe and Rachel are talking. Dr. Green is not at the table.]
Dr. Green: I just called a friend of mine.
Dr. Green: I think I may be able to book The Plaza on short notice.
Dr. Green: What is it sweetie?
Dr. Green: What?!
Dr. Green: I dont believe this!!
Dr. Green: Stay calm?!! How do you expect me to stay calm?! This is unacceptable Rachel! And I wanna know why?!! Is it because that punk Ross wont marry you?! Thats it! Is that it?!
Ross: Aw forget it, its from Pier One. (Theres an angry knock on the door.) Sorry. (Goes and opens the door to an irate Dr. Green.)
Dr. Green: You think you can knock up my daughter and then not marry her?! Im gonna kill you!!
Dr. Green: So? Come on! Explain yourself Geller! First you get my Rachel pregnant!
Dr. Green: You did!
Dr. Green: Oh? Really? Thats what my daughter means to you? Nothing?
Dr. Green: Oh really? Thats how treat a friend? You get her in trouble and then refuse to marry her?
Ross: (to Dr. Green) Hey! I offered to marry her!
Dr. Green: Well why not? So you can spend your time with this tramp?!
Ross: Im sorry. Dr. Green, Mona. Mona, Dr. Green.
Dr. Green: But what?! You figured youd get what you wanted and then dump her like you dumped Rachel!
Ross: Hey! I did not dump Rachel! (To Mona) Nor are we still together. (The phone rings and Ross goes to answer it, only hes trapped behind the apothecary table by Dr. Green.) Can I just (Dr. Green glares at him.) Why dont we just let the machine get that?
Dr. Green: (on phone) just because youre not in love with the guy you cant
Dr. Green: (on phone, not hearing her) theres gonna be a wedding! (Joey enters from his room and goes to get a beer from the fridge.) Thats unacceptable Rachel! What the hell does love have to do with it anyway?! There are more important things in a marriage other than love! (Joey hears something and looks around for the source.) constantly thinking about things! You have to think about the consequences of your decision. (Joey finds that the sound is coming from the phone and puts it to his ear.)
Nurse #2: Its not hopeless! Dr. Stryker Remorays a miracle worker. Look, here he comes.
JOEY: I don't need to think about it. I was Dr. Drake Remoray. That was huge. Big things are gonna happen, you'll see. Ross, you still there?
Dr. Harad: Okay, you're at ten centimeters. Time to start having some babies. All right, I want only the father in here please.
Monica: Oh I cant. Dr. Roger is coming over again.
Joey: Well, I was Dr. Drake Remoray, Strykers twin brother. I mean, who looks more me than me right?
Dr. Miller: Okay then, I guess we'll see you back here in three months.
Dr. Rhodes: He's good with rear things, bring him in too.
Dr. Franzblau: All right, ten centimeters, here we go.
Ross: Oh Donald that-that would be great. I am totally ready to come back to work. IWhat? (He notices something through the window.) No! Wh What are you doing?!! (Dr. Ledbetter is slowly backing away.) GET OFF MY SISTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dr. Leedbetter: Now-now calm down. Come look in my office, some of it my still be in the trash.
Chandler: Is that a hint? Because we love you Doctor Connelly but we don't think we'd want you to be our child! (Dr. Connelly glares at him) Wow, talking about an inhospitable environment!
Phoebe: No Dr. Skeptismo! Im sure. First of all, okay, theres the feeling. (Chandler shrugs) Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into my guitar case which is lined with orange felt. (Rachel nods her head in unsure agreement) My Mothers favourite fish is Orange Roughy... (Joey thinks he understands, but then nods that he has no clue.) Cats....like....fish! (Ross and Rachel are totally lost) (to the cat) Hi, Mommy. (Rachel covers her mouth, in an Oh my God. gesture) Oh, I havent seen this smile in 17 years!
Dr. Long: Huh. Nice to meet you. Ill get started on this.
Little Girl: Dr. Geller?
Little Girl: Dr. Geller, will you dance with me?
Dr. Stryker Remoray: Good morning. (He walks over to the bed, leans down, and whispers to him.) Drake, its your brother Stryker. Can you hear me?
Dr. Long: Congratulations. Ill give you two a minute.
Rachel: Oh no Dr. Long, please come in. This is Ross, he is the father.
Dr. Long: (entering) Am I interrupting?
Nurse: Just so you know, Dr. Long cant be here today, she was called to the hospital, so Dr. Schiff will be seeing you.
Dr. Drake Ramoray: Is it serious?
Dr. Drake Ramoray: What is it?
(Dr. Long exits and Rachel starts to cry.)
Dr. Long: Okay, everything looks good. Here it is on the screen. (We see Ross and Rachel looking at the screen.) Here is your uterus. And right here is your baby.
Dr. Schiff: (entering) Hi Rachel? Im Dr. Schiff. (By the way, hes an attractive man.)
Dr. Schiff: So, hows it going?
ROSS: Hi Dr. Greene. So, uh, how's everything in the uh, vascular surgery....game?
Dr. Schiff: Im a doctor.
Dr. Schiff: Uh, I dont have a wife or girlfriend, but I do like to ski.
Dr. Schiff: Okay then, would you like to lie down on the table?
Dr. Schiff: Im sorry, is there something going on here?
Dr. Green: Well what if somebody steals something? How are you gonna run after him with one leg shorter than the other?!
Dr. Drake Ramoray: Well that sounds simple enough, lets just do that.
Dr. Long: Okay! All your tests look fine. Now, are you two interested in knowing the sex of the baby?
Dr. Long: Thats right. But if you dont want to know
(Dr. Long enters.)
Dr. Long: Absolutely.
Burt: (exiting from a restaurant) Dr. Geller!
Dr. Schiff: So, are you experiencing any discomfort?
Rachel: Thank you doctor. (Dr. Long exits.) (To Joey) Oh thank you for being so nice and calm.
Dr. Long: You must be a little uncomfortable.
Dr. Long: So, eight days late huh?
Dr. Long: taking a long walk, and then theres the one thats proved most effective: sex.
Dr. Long: Okay, theres an herbal tea you can drink.
Dr. Long: Actually, theyre things you can do. Just some home remedies, but in my experience Ive found that some of them are quite effective.
Rachel: Hi Dr. Long, how are you?
Dr. Long: Well do a quick check.
Joey: (walks up) Uh, shes with me. (Introduces himself) Dr. Drake Remoray.
Dr. Long: You can take some caster oil, theres eating spicy foods
Dr. Long: Ill be back in an hour to check you again.
Rachel: Thank you. (Dr. Long exits.) Well, I guess we have some time to kill.
Nurse: Dr. Drake who?
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Dr. Long is checking on Rachel again.]
Phoebe: No not you, Dr. Drake Remoray. You can ask him questions and see whats he like. People tell doctors everything.
[Scene: Room 816, Dr. Drake Remoray is entering.]
Man: Really? Ive been dealing with Dr. Wells.
Dr. Long: Three.
Dr. Long: Actually, I think youre ready to go to the delivery room.
Dr. Long: Here we go! Okay, keep pushing! Wait! I see something.
Joey: Hi! Im Dr. Drake Remoray and I have a few routine questions I need to ask you.
Dr. Long: Here she is!
(Dr. Long hands her to Rachel.)
Dr. Long: Twenty-one hours, youre a hero.
Man: Dr. Wells is a woman.
Dr. Long: Push. Push. Come on push for five seconds. 5 4
Dr. Long: Shes gonna be fine. Okay, shes in a more difficult position so youre gonna have to push even harder now. Go! Push!
Dr. Long: Here we go!
Dr. Long: Good!
Dr. Long: Do we have a name yet?
Dr. Long: Thats fine, for now well just call her Baby Girl Green.
Rachel: Oh. Look at you making up crap for me. Oh God! (Starts another contraction as Dr. Long enters.)
Rachel: Dr. Wiener.
Ross: Actually that-thats not true, in The Incredible Hulk uh, No. 72, Dr. Bruce Banner found (Sees everyone staring at him and stops.) Yknow, ugh, nevermind, my girlfriends a lesbian. (Leaves.)
Rachel: I'm on the phone! (On the phone) Dr. Wiener? (Ross and Rachel walk away)
Rachel: Yeah. Just to be sure I'm gonna call Dr. Wiener.
Monica: Why don't you go see Dr. Gettleman?
Ross: Dr. Gettleman? Yeah I know, I don't think that's a good idea. In fact, I think he's dead.
Receptionist: Dr. Gettleman is finishing up with a patient, he should be out shortly.
Ross: Dad dad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh, and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because not only is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shes the greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising a glass to the, the couple were here to celebrate. (Everyone does so.) To the Bings.
Monica: Are you serious? You still see Dr. Gettleman?
Dr. Green: This is nice. I pay two hundred dollars for dinner, you put down twenty, and you come out looking like Mr. Big Shot. You really want to be Mr. Big Shot? Here, Ill tell you what, you pay the whole bill, Mr. Big Shot, all right. (rips up the bill, and throws it at Ross, then leaves)
[Scene: Dr. Longs Office, Ross and Rachel are waiting for the doctor. Ross is drumming his fingers on the bed.]
DR. BURKE: OK. You better. Oh God, here we go. Hey wanna see 'em go nuts? Watch this. [grabbing some wine glasses and opening the door to the party] Who needs glasses? [everyone laughs]
Dr. Miller: 1 2 (She flinches on 2 this time.)
(Dr. Connelly glares at Chandler)
Charlie: Yeah, sounds like a good idea... Dr. Geller!
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Rachel is in bed, Ross is fooling around, and Dr. Long is checking on Rachel.]
Charlie: Ooh... Dr. Geller!
Dr. Long: Okay, the next contraction should be in about twenty seconds.
Benjamin: Dr. Geller...? Charlie... What are you... what are you doing here?
Benjamin: Certainly. Very well. And Dr. Geller, when is my birthday?
Dr. Li: Half a dozen.
Benjamin: I see, and Dr. Biely?
Dr. Long: No-no. Contractions can be unnerving if you dont know what they are, but shes fine.
Dr. Green: What, the heart attack or sitting here talking to you?
Dr. Green: Ooh, I have a little heart attack.
Benjamin: Certainly. Dr. Geller, which 1965 Shirelles hit was later covered by a popular British invasion band?
Dr. Biely: Primarily in the Pierre Shale region of South Dakota.
Dr. Green: What are you doing here, Geller?
Dr. Green: No, when you put your feet up in my bed, you tugged on my catheter.