words in movies
Teacher: Good for you. Alrighty, next?
(Nina beams flirtatiously at Chandler, who catches her drift, but for once hes lost for something to say – so she nods her head to tell him that hes thinking correctly...)
(He happily gestures at Chandler that there was nothing to worry about, then exits. Rachel and Monica are concerned for poor Phoebe, who slides back down next to Ross.)
[Scene: Lamaze class. Susan is there. Each couple has a doll, for they have just finished learning how to change a diaper. As Ross rushes in, stepping on the Rostins pretend baby, squashing its head flat. It bleats, in protest. He performs emergency surgery, then hands the doll back to J.C.]
(Ross and Susan each gesture for the other to lie down.)
Susan: I will flip you for it.
Ross: Flip me for it? No, no, no... heads, heads, heads!
Rachel: So Pheebs, what do you want for your birthday?
Phoebe: Well, what I really want is for my mom to be alive and enjoy it with me.
Joey: Oh, no no no. Its for Ursula. I just figured, you know, size-wise.
Chandler: Wow, this is serious. Ive never known you to pay money for any kind of capade.
Soothing male voice: ..a sound Mom and Dad never forget. For this after all, is the miracle of birth.
Susan: I know its frightening, but, big picture. The birth part is just one day, and when its over, were all gonna be parents for the rest of our lives.
[Scene 13: Central Perk, the gang is gathered around Monica comforting her brother, who in a slight state of shock is cuddling a cushion for security.]
Nina: I dont know. For the past couple days, people have been avoiding me and giving me these really strange looks.
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are sharing a bowl of popcorn, while Monica carefully reads the instruction manual for her television set.]
Chandler: Pretty well. Except for the stapler thing. (He holds up a bandaged hand.) Little tip: if youre ever in a similar situation, never ever leave your hand... (he mimes Nina taking her revenge) ..on the desk.
Phoebe: Well, but thats what he was for me. And she you know, kind of stole him away, and then... broke his heart... and then he wouldnt even talk to me any more. Because he said he didnt wanna be around... anything that looked like either one of us.
(Phoebe gets up and walks across the hallway, but the door to Chandler and Joeys apartment is shut. She knocks, and anxiously waits for Joey to come, but instead her identical twin sister emerges wearing one of Joeys shirts.)
Joey: I don’t know. She’s got to be taking it hard, I was like her only client. Except for this guy who eats paper. And I’m guessing he eats more money than he makes. Look, I know she’s not a great agent, but she did stick with me for ten years. I’m gonna call her and hire her again.
Friend No. 2: Oh, isnt it exciting, I mean its like having a boyfriend for life.
Phoebe: So-so, what do you want for lunch?
Joey: Well, I like it. Here you go. (He pays for the hat.)
Rachel: Thanks for lunch, Chandler. Y'know, you didnt have to walk me all the way back up here.
Joey: Sh-shh-shh! (He motions for her to watch something he has taped.)
Monica: I can�t believe I did this. I can�t believe I'm singing for the people, and they liked me! Hey, did you hear thatone shouting �look at those tips�! I mean, did I really help you get a lot of tips?
Joey: Hi, uh, I'll be reading for the role of Mercutio.
(He brought home Chandler for Thanksgiving. Chandler is sporting the very popular Flock of Seagulls haircut. Yeah, it's another you have to see it to believe it kinda thing.)
Phoebe: No no no, Ill be nice, I swear!!! Could you just give me the number for where they are?
Kathy: Oh. Well uh, (to Chandler) you not being able to talk may make this easier. Listen umm (She looks at the gang who are watching, they take the hint and leave them alone.) Listen I dont wanna be someone who comes between two best friends. I just, I cant stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and I dont wanna be the cause of that. So, I dont think we can see each other anymore. Im gonna go to my moms in Chicago, Im gonna stay there for awhile. I think this couldve be something really amazing, but yknow this is probably for the best. Yknow? Im gonna miss you. Good-bye, Chandler.
Monica: Okay, all right dont judge me to much. Okay? Um, but I saw this info-mercial, and um, I swear to you I have never-ever bought anything on TV before, except for this mop. But there was this stuff on leg waxing, it just, it looked so amazing....
Eric: Absolutely. (They kiss and Phoebe heads for the door.) I love the way you kiss.
Mr. Geller: This bill for my half of the wedding. its insane.
Fat Monica: Umm, Chandler, if you want I can make you some macaroni and cheese for dinner.
Mr. Geller: Theres no way in hell, Im paying for it.
Rachel: I uh, I have two tickets to the Knicks game tonight if youre interested, just as a thank you for this week.
ROSS: [approaching the mover holding the parrot] Hey hold on, hold on. How much for the uh, how much to save the bird?
Joey: Okay. (They both walk off to watch for Rachel.)
Ticket Counter Attendant: (on the P.A.) This is the final boarding call for Flight 664 to Yemen.
Mrs. Waltham: (Slapping the phone into Joeys chest.) Joey theres a girl on the phone for you.
Rachel: Oh, uh, Joanna I was wondering if I could ask you something. Theres an opening for an assistant buyer in Junior Miss
Carol: Y'know what, I want to talk to you about this so much, but we should probably do it when we could really get into it, are you free for dinner tomorrow night?
ROSS: I just wanna thank you for being there for me today. And I'm sorry I,I almost broke your hand.
Joey: I got this pair marked excess, I gotta tell ya, there was no room for excess anything in there.
Ross: Umm, I'm sorry Judy, I couldn't find that bowl that you and Jack were looking for.
Monica: No time for that!
Rachel: All right, yknow what, come on, do we really have to watch this while we eat? (She makes a move for the remote.)
Ross: Actually, do you guys mind staying here for a while?
Mr. Waltham: Weve come for her things.
Chandler: We have to leave for New York in an hour.
(Monica gets up and heads for the bathroom, Chandler turns to watch her go and is startled to see Joey sitting in Monicas seat.)
Chandler: (to Robert) So ah, isnt a bit cold out for shorts?
Ross: (To Phoebe) Hey Pheebs! How's that uh, vegetarian pizza working out for ya? You and those vegetables have a real thing going on, huh?
Rachel: Oh, come on Ross! I think it would be really good for you!
Chandler: For the last time no! Get out! Get out, Joey!
(Joey gives him a thumbs up and heads for the chicken.)
(Joey leaves and Monica comes up for air.)
Chandler: And people say you dont pay attention. No, this is a much better job. Its vice-president of a company that does data reconfiguration and statistical factoring for other companies.
MONICA: Come here. I'll make you feel like one of the guys. You know for a really cool guy, you suck at foosball.
Ross: Em-Emily? (Looking around for her.) Em-Emily? (He runs to the door.) Emily! (He opens the door to reveal the Walthams standing outside.)
(Chandler and Joey look at her, and then look back at him. They dive for Ross's hand to see what he had, and he tries to stop them from looking.)
Chandler: It's okay, the duck's using our bathroom anyway. (Kathy goes into the bathroom.) Hey Joe! What are you getting Kathy for her birthday?
Chandler: Im not even getting married! Okay, this is a question for science fiction writers!
Ross: Oh, it's not so bad. Monica's gonna make potpourri! I think I'm gonna go wander out in the rain for a while.
MONICA: Ok everybody, it's time for flan.
Rachel: Yeah. (She goes out to join her in the hall and starts looking for the dropped socks.)
Joey: No, was my best friend. Anyway, I dont know why youre pushing for him so hard. With him out of the way as my best friend, theres a spot open.
Monica: Thank you. Rachel, can I talk to you outside for a sec?
(They all go pack except for Ross.)
Ross: No thank you for Thank you.
Rachel: That's what I said! Thank you for being so nice. (They hug.)
Rachel: I know. At dusk. Thats such a hard time for me.
Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean you dont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.
[Scene: The waiting room, Chandler is looking for Monica.]
Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean you dont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.
(Phoebe fakes pain to get Ross looking for another doctor.)
[Cut to Mona and Joey clearing the dining room table for the grudge match between Chandler and Ross.]
Joey: You don't think this is going to be a big break for me?
Phoebe: Tell him it's for you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey is getting ready for a fishing trip and Phoebe is asking him about the fishing lures. Ross is playing with the rod, and Monica is pretty much just watching the on goings.]
[Cut to the delivery room, Phoebe is at it for the last time.]
Hold Voice: Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
All: Hey! (They all go hug her, except for Ross.)
Sandy: I realise how it's... a bit unorthodox for some people, but I really believe, the most satisfying thing you can do with your life, is take care of a child.
Dr. Green: This is nice. I pay two hundred dollars for dinner, you put down twenty, and you come out looking like Mr. Big Shot. You really want to be Mr. Big Shot? Here, Ill tell you what, you pay the whole bill, Mr. Big Shot, all right. (rips up the bill, and throws it at Ross, then leaves)
Monica: (In a sexy voice) Come in. I've been waiting for you.
Ross: Thanks for the help, problem solved. (Wipes his hands.)
Chandler: I am so sorry. I really am. I was an idiot back then. I rushed the stage at a Wham concert for crying out loud!
The Assistant Director: (to another actor) Richard? Were ready for you. (Richard approaches.) Joey Tribbiani? This is Richard Crosby hes playing Vincent.
Ross: For what?
Chandler: Because that's who I am, okay? I'm sure a mature man like Richard could see a tape like that and it wouldn't bother him. Just'd be another saucy anecdote for him to share at his men's club over brandy and moustaches.
[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is making coffee for Joey and Chandler.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is coming home. As we walks through the door, and without looking up, he goes to throw his keys on the foosball table, only, its gone and the keys it the floor. He then looks up at an empty apartment; everything is gone except for the entertainment center and that ceramic dog. Even the food in the fridge!]
Joey: Me too, but I guess I do have a couple of more(his time runs out for real)
CHAN: [slowly lifts coffee cup to his mouth] Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. [slowly sets the cup back down] Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. [Joey intercepts the cup and puts it down for him]. She's insane, the woman is insane. It's before work, it's after work, it's during work. She's got me doing butt clenches at my desk. And now, they won't bring me my mail anymore.
Monica: Which we are, and-and we already paid for it. Its My Giant!
Chandler: Okay, y'know your not though. Let's go. (He starts for his bedroom.)
Rachel: Well, we were walking down the street and we saw that van that you guys used for catering and we realised
Rachel: Oh my gosh! Oh wow! Oh, I know what this is! (Shes holding an item with a large suction cup connected to a yellow plastic box, with a long narrow tube and bottle connected the yellow part.) Wait a minute. That cant be right. Is that a beer bong for a baby?
The Vendor: So, what are you guys in the market for? Weve got uh, scarves, tulip post cards...
Monica: (Poking her head in) Rach? Can I talk to for just a minute? I-I dropped some socks.
Joey: (approaching) Ross, hey, the bands ready outside for your first dance with Emily, so
Jim: I write erotic novels, for children.
Monica: What?! You cant shed a tear for your dead wife!! Now, I left you a note from the beyond!
Ross: is for me not to see you anymore.
Monica: Chandler! (Motions for him to come outside.)
Chandler: Joey, can I talk to you for a second? (He grabs him and starts to drag Joey into Monica's room.)
Chandler: So, thanks for having me over! Rach. (Goes over, grabs her, and kisses her.) Pheebs. (After a moment while he decides how to kiss her around her belly, grabs her and kisses her.)
Monica: Hey, don't blame me for wigging tonight!
Phoebe: Count for what?
Chandler: Aren't you supposed to be at an audition for another hour?
(Phoebe is trying not to smile. He moves closer and very shyly holds out his hand and turns his head, hoping for Phoebe to take his hand. She doesn't.)
(Ross suddenly gets up and heads for the bathroom.)
(They struggle for the cart. Finally, Rachel climbs inside of it.)
Monica: Oh he's nice. He's nice! Y'know, you always stick up for the people we fog!
Phoebe: Hey! So I had a great day, Rick and I really hit it off, and we started making out, and then my boss walked in and fired me for being a whore.
Monica: Right, you only go for them 5 minutes before they get married.
Phoebe: Oh No, I did that for someone once and I'm not comfortable having that kind of power and control over someone's life.
Danny: Okay. (Heads for his apartment.)