words in movies
MONICA: Alright, for the bizillionth time, yes I see other women in shower at the gym, and no I don't look.
ROSS: Ooh, I, I'm so sick of missing stuff. Ya know, I want him for more than, than a day, I want him for a whole weekend. No listen , I mean, I feel like-
CHANDLER: Yeah, he let us drive his Jaguar. Joey for 12 blocks, me for 15.
JOEY: Oh, what about that thing he did when he tipped the guy who showed us to our seats. You never even saw the money, it was like this. [With money in his palm] Hey Chandler, thanks for showing us to our seats [shakes his had and passes the dollar].
CHANDLER: You're welcome. Hey Joey, thanks for parking the car [passes the dollar back].
ROSS: Well for starters, you may want to light it and lose the spatula.
JOEY: Oh we flipped for it. I got the cigar, he got the moustache. Figured if we both grew it, we'd look like dorks.
ROSS: Naa. A while ago I got a sah out of him, which I thought, ya know, might turn into sah-condary caregiver but... Hey, would you uh, would you hold him for a sec, 'cause I, I gotta take this off.
PHOEBE: Please, I almost fell for that with, uh, Pride of the Yankees, I thought I was gonna see a film about Yankee pride and then, boom, the guy gets Lou Gehrig's disease.
MONICA: Listen, um honey, I appreciate this but you don't have to keep hanging out with them for me, I mean, they have each other.
RICHARD: Oh, no, honey, I mean, don't worry, I like hanging out with those guys. It's fun for me. They're different than my other friends, they don't start sentences with, 'You know who just died shoveling snow?'
RACHEL: Yeah well, Ross just made plans for the whole century.
RACHEL: Ross, you have planned out the next 20 years of our lives, we've been dating for six weeks.
RACHEL: But I do not want to have everything decided for me. I spent my whole life like that. It's what I had with Barry, that was one of the reasons I left. I, I like not knowing right now and I'm sorry if that scares you but if you want to be with me you are gonna have to deal with that.
PHOEBE: Hey. Oh thanks for the great movie tip.
JOEY: No no, seriously, Chandler and I were just talkin about this. He is so much cooler than our dads. [Chandler starts kicking him below the table] I mean, you know, our dad's are ok, ya know, but Richard is just- ow, ow. What are you kickin me for? Huh? I'm tryin to talk here.
MONICA: Come here. I'll make you feel like one of the guys. You know for a really cool guy, you suck at foosball.
SUSAN: Ok, this could go on for a while.
PHOEBE: [pauses the tape] Ok, Ben, this is the part where Ernie buries Bert in the sand and can't find him. Now, I've looked ahead on the tape and he does find him again. But, ok, before that happens, there's some pretty rough goin' for a while but I think we can handle it. And, there's just the alphabet but we know that ends well so. Ok, here we go. [starts the tape again]
Rachel: Anyway, um, (Gets the ring out of her purse.) I guess this belongs to you. And thank you for giving it to me.
Ross: No problem. I cannot wait for you to meet my friends.
(Ross starts to play. He plays a key that has a back beat sound attached to it. Over the background music he plays the sound of a barking dog, a mooing cow, a laser beam, someone coughing, a jackhammer, a doorbell, a police siren, a ray gun, breaking dishes, and for a closer he plays the sound of a loud crash. Basically, the music sucks.)
Rachel: These are, these aren't for you. (to Julie) These are for you. (Loudly, thinking she can't speak English.) Welcome to our country.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is waiting for Rachel to return from the airport with Ross.]
Monica: I'm telling you, she went to the airport, and she's gonna go for it with Ross!
[Scene, The Airport, continued from last season, Rachel is waiting for Ross to come of the plane, when she sees he's coming off with another woman.]
[Scene: The hospital, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are in the waiting room, waiting for Carol and Susan to arrive.]
Man: For God's sake, will you let it go? There's no Rachel!
Ross: Nah, I dunno... I think you reach a certain age, having a roommate is kinda pathe- (Realises) ....sorry, that's, that's 'pathet', which is Sanskrit for 'really cool way to live'.
Joey: (answering the phone) Hello? Oh, hi. Yeah, hold on a second. Ross, it's Julie, for you. (Throws him the phone.)
Chandler: No, no, I'm just looking for a man to draw on me with chalk.
Rachel: (poking her head in from her bedroom) Uh, morning. Do you guys think you could close your eyes for just a sec?
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there except for Chandler. Rachel is writing something and Monica walks up.]
Ross: Yeah, ooh yeah, I think there is one from batch 17 left, uh (Grabs a cookie and takes a big bite out of it and doesnt like it.) Its batch 16! 16 people! Get out of the way! (Gets up and runs for the bathroom.)
Barry: Yeah! It's fine, it's fine. Robbie's gonna be here for hours.
Joey: No way. I've been going to the guy for 12 years.
Rachel: Well, can I talk to you for a sec?
Phoebe: Nothing! You have apologized to her like a million times and shes been nothing but terrible to you. And dont forget you just threw her daughter a lovely, albeit slightly boring, shower, and she hasnt even thanked you for it.
Chandler: All right, look, look. What did... what did you get for Angela Delveccio for her birthday?
Joey: Yeah. Bijan for men?
Rachel: And a nice hot cider for Monica. (Hands it to her.)
Rachel: You went shopping for fur?
Phoebe: Um, we went shopping for um, for, fur.
Susan: Oh, I got that for him.
Carol: Ok, and this is Funny Clown. Funny Clown is only for after his naps, not before his naps or he won't sleep.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol is dropping Ben off for Ross to watch.]
Monica: Really, Rachel, I was thinking of you the whole time. Look, I'm sorry, all right. I never meant for you to find out!
Chandler: (sarcastic) For an emergency just like this.
[Scene: The Geller household kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are cooking for Mrs. Gellers party.]
Monica: What are you guys doing? (Monica hears the moaning coming from the TV and looks at it) Oh my God, is that Richard? (It only takes a split second for Joey to realise, he pulls Monica down by her jacket, and she falls, face down next to Chandler. Chandler gets up a bit, and Joey quickly covers Chandler's eyes with his hand.)
Rachel: (crying) I'd do anything for you, you know that.
Prospective nanny: (in a sweet, caring voice) I think that's really smart. The easier we can make the transition for her, the better. (Ross and Rachel seem pleased with the answer.)
JOEY: That was a good one. For a second there, I was like, "whoa."
MONICA: What can we do for you?
Dr. Franzblau: All right, Carol, I need you to keep pushing. I need(reaches for an instrument, Rachel's hand is on it) Excuse me, could I have this?
Phoebe: Well, Im ready to get the hell out of here! (Sees Ross and Rachel cuddling on the couch.) Oh. Are you? Are you?!! (they nod Yes.) Ohh! Thats so great!! Ooh, not for Bonnie. (they nod No.) But for you, yay! Ohh.
Phoebe: No, no, it's not your fault. You know it's partly my fault, 'cause I made you quit cold turkey. Sorry, no. Okay, well, I mean, I can't date you anymore, 'cause your, you know (in a high pitched voice) Wow! But um, but I will definitely, definitely help you get over my sister. Okay, stalk me for a while. Huh? Yeah, and, and, and, I'll be like an Ursula patch.
Dr. Biely: Three for excavation and two for analysis.
STRANGER: Yeah, I'm looking for Phoebe, does she still live here?
Monica: Carol called me to thank me for the lasagna, I asked, she told me.
(Rachel, Monica, Ross and Chandler whip around for a second time, in formation.)
[Scene: Carol's Room, she is ready to give birth. Everyone is there except for Phoebe, Ross, and Susan, who are in the broom closet.]
PHOEBE: OK, no. For your information I'm going to see him so I can put all those feeling behind me. OK, and the reason I'm dressed like this is because I think it's nice to look nice for your gay husband.
Joey: (interrupting her) Hey! Don't worry about it! It was fine! I ended up having the best time with Rachel! I just felt bad for you, stuck in that room, working on Ross's speech... (pulls a face)
ROSS: Julie, can you hold this for a second, thanks. [hands her a bowl and kisses her]
Phoebe: Well not so much a pet as, you know, an occasional visitor who I put food out for, you know. Kinda like Santa. Except Santa doesn't poop on the plate of cookies.
Rachel: We just uh, we just met at the newsstand. We both grabbed for the last Field & Stream. (Chandlers shocked.) What? I read that.
Joey: Oh, no no no. Its for Ursula. I just figured, you know, size-wise.
Rachel: Well isnt it better that I exchanged it for something that I enjoy and that I can get a lot of use out of?
ROSS: You ever figure out what that thing's for?
Phoebe: I know, I know. So sweet... and so complicated. And for a shrink, he's not too shrinky, y'know?
JOEY: For Ross.
RACHEL: For Ross, Ross, Ross.
JOEY: Yeah, someplace nice. (to Phoebe and Rachel) How much do you think I can get for my kidney? (at Central Perk)
ROSS: That sounds great. Same for me.
WAITER: And for the gentleman?
WAITER: And for you?
PHOEBE: Not for you.
Monica: It's just... It's hard enough not seeing you during the week, but for Christmas... alright, if this is what you have to do, I understand.
Ross: Okay. (Ross starts frantically looking for a clock.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler have trading the entertainment center for the canoe. Joey is sitting in the bow, staring off into space as to envision his future full of possibilities. Chandler is sitting at the stern, staring into space and is looking at an uncertain future.]
ROSS: Well maybe, you know, maybe we should stay for one song.
CHANDLER: Yeah, I mean, it would be rude to them for us to leave now.
ROSS: Let me hold him for a sec. There. (Ben stops crying) Huh? There we are.
TERRY: Uh, Rachel, sweetheart, could I see ya for a minute?
Dr. Franzblau: I'm sorry, I can't tell the baby to wait for them.
Phoebe: Oh, look at these! Hey, Ben. Just do it. (Ben starts to cry) Oh my God, oh, ok, was that too much pressure for him?
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there ready for another poker game.]
RACHEL: Ok, while you "mmm" on it for awhile, I'm gonna go find a place for my new lamp.
Monica: Alright, you know, we got it, we got it. Let's play for real. High stakes... big bucks...
RACHEL: It's just this thing. Every year we would go out on my dad's boat and watch the fireworks. Mom always hated it because the ocean air made her hair all big. My sister Jill would be throwing up over the side and my dad would be upset becasue nobody was helping and then when we did help he would scream at us for doing it wrong. But then when the fireworks started, everybody just shut up, you know, and it'd get really cold, and we would all just sort of smush under this one blanket. It never occured to anybody to bring another one. And now it's just...
Susan: I know its frightening, but, big picture. The birth part is just one day, and when its over, were all gonna be parents for the rest of our lives.
JOEY: Uh, uh, we'll flip for it. Ducks or clowns.
RACHEL: Well, people missed you in there. And in fact, there was actually a request for "Smelly Cat".
MONICA: Oh, gosh, this is so weird. I mean, his whole life was in this apartment, and now it's gone. You know, I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments, for Mr. Heckles. I mean, he was kind of a pain, he was, but, he was a person. You're all going to hell.
ROSS: Will you hold Ben for a sec? Come here. Come here.
Rachel: Oh. Well then, you better go take that back because they're gonna charge you for that.
PHOEBE: You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason.
(Joey lunges for phone and misses.)
Phoebe: (in voice, on phone) 'Okay, go ahead.' (in normal voice on phone) Um, hi Annie. (listens) Fantastic! (to Joey) You got it. (on phone) Oh, okay, um, 'Will he work for scale?' you ask me. Well, I don't know about that, (Joey clears his throat to signify yes) except that I do and he will. Great, oh you are such a sweetheart. I would love to have lunch with you, how about we have lunch next....(hangs up phone) Op, went through a tunnel.
RACH: Hi, I'm sorry, I need to borrow your phone for just one minute.
Chandler: Look, Ross, you gotta understand, between us we haven't had a relationship that has lasted longer than a Mento. You, however have had the love of a woman for four years. Four years of closeness and sharing at the end of which she ripped your heart out, and that is why we don't do it! I don't think that was my point!
RACH: Thank you. OK. [dials] [to Michael] Machine. Just waiting for the beep.
Joey: Oh yeah, thats just a little something for my huge gay fan base. (Winks at him.)
ROSS: You've had feelings for me?
RACH: Ohh, OK, OK, OK, well, basically, lately, I've uh, I've uh, sort of had feelings for you.
RACH: Yeah, what, so? You had feelings for me first.
Phoebe: Oh hey you guys, I couldn�t get a reservation for the night of my birthday, so we have to do dinner Thursday night instead.
RACH: Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. You think it's easy for me to see you with Julie?
Flight Attendant: Sir? Sir? Excuse me, sir? Uh... I have a message for you.
Monica: Yeah, tacos! Ever since you told me that story Ive had such a craving for them.
PHOE: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?
MNCA: [reading the paper] There are no jobs. There are no jobs for me.
Monica: Just out. Had some lunch, just me, little quality time with me. Thanks for your jacket.
Phoebe: Look, she only suspects something okay? She doesnt know for sure, so just throw her off the track.
JOEY: Ross, listen. I got two words for you. Threesome.
Ross: Hey. Rachel, I-I-I've been wanting to tell you something for a while now and I really, I just have to get it out.
MNCA: Just waiting for it to stop bubbling.