words in movies
[Scene: Ross and Monicas parents garage, Ross and Monica are arriving to go through their things. Mr. Geller is in the garage.]
Mr. Geller: Im here!
Mr. Geller: Hi. God, it seems like just yesterday you guys used to come out to watch me work.
Mr. Geller: Well, its time for a new family to start their memories here and hopefully their check will clear before they find the crack in the foundation and the asbestos in the ceiling.
Mr. Geller: Im sorry we cant store your childhood things anymore.
Mr. Geller: Well, I dont know whats in the boxes down here, but I do know there are six or seven Easy Bake Ovens in the attic.
Mr. Geller: So, I think youre boxes are over here. (They walk over to them.)
Mr. Geller: I dont know. They-they must be your mothers, but please, please dont ask her. Ill throw these away. (He puts them in his pocket as Ross finds something of interest in one of his boxes.)
Mr. Geller: Oh look, look theres your old makeup kit!
Mr. Geller: Well, the white seems to be untouched. (He throws it back into the box as Mr. Geller moves a tarp and makes a discovery.) Uh-oh.
Mr. Geller: Yknow how the garage floods every Spring?
Mr. Geller: I think I accidentally used Monicas boxes to keep the water away from the Porsche.
Mr. Geller: You dont secretly smoke do you?
Mr. Geller: So its just your mother then.
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, continued from earlier. Ross and Mr. Geller are still deciding what to do.]
Mr. Geller: Well, shell understand right? Its not like I did it on purpose.
Mr. Geller: Oh my God, does she really thinks that?
Mr. Geller: Well I dont know, I-I suppose we may have favored you unconsciously, you were a medical marvel! The doctor said your mother could
Mr. Geller: Really?
Mr. Geller: Great!
Mr. Geller: Sure!
Mr. Geller: (grabbing a glove) This couldve been hers!
Mr. Geller: Your make-up kit? Id feel better.
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, Mr. Geller and Ross are finishing up recreating Monicas memories as Monica enters.]
Mr. Geller: (overacting) Thats a good one! Do you hear that Ross? Three days!
Mr. Geller: Oh, yeah you loved that glove! You took it every place you went. You never went any place without that glove.
Mr. Geller: Well, the garage flooded sweetie and it ruined everything in your boxes. Im sorry.
Mr. Geller: Im afraid so.
Mr. Geller: Well, I used your boxes to divert water away from the Porsche.
Mr. Geller: There was also leaves and guk and stuff.
Mr. Geller: (To Ross) Screw it! Im having one. (Takes out and lights a cigarette.)
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, Monica is picking through her ruined childhood heirlooms with Ross.]
Mr. Geller: (entering) How are you honey?
Mr. Geller: Sweetheart, we love you just as much as Ross! Now, Im sorry about everything that happened and Id probably never be able to make it up to you, but heres a start. (He hands her a small box.)
Mr. Geller: Its the key to my Porsche. Well, the key to your Porsche.
Mr. Geller: Ive been thinking about getting rid of it. I was driving it the other day and saw my reflection in a store window. Your mothers right, I do look like an ass.
Mr. Geller: (To Monica) Why dont we take it for a spin?
MRS. GELLER: So Jack, you ever think about trading me in for a younger model?
[Scene: Ross's apartment, he's having his party, only he's the only guest. He gets up and puts on a nametag that says Ross, but doesn't quite like it. So he takes it off and puts on one that says Dr. Geller and he puts the Ross one underneath the Dr. Geller one. Then as he turns off the music, we hear the party for Howard raging in the apartment across the hall.]
Ross: Phoebe! You're note, amazing! Not only did no one touch my sandwich, but people at work are actually afraid of me. Yeah, a guy called me mental! Mental Geller, yeah, I always wanted a cool nickname like that.
Monica: Well, every, every Thanksgiving um, we used to have a touch football game called the Geller Bowl.
Ross: We met at Phoebes birthday party, Im, Im Ross Geller.
Phoebe: You guys were right. Hes just too excited about everything. I mean Im all for living life, but this is the Gellers 35th anniversary. Okay? Lets call a spade a spade this party stinks.
MR. GELLER: Atta boy. [Ross scrambles upstairs to change]
Leader: Hi. And batting for Sarah, Ross Geller, 872. Although, it looks like you bought an awful lot of cookies yourself.
[Scene: The Hospital, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there, along with Aunt Lillian. Ross and Monica enter and everyone says hi and kisses.)
Mrs. Geller: Um-hmm.
MR. GELLER: It's the off light. Right Ross? [pans over to see Ross with an afro and moustache]
Chandler: (To Monica) Why? Why-why-would youWh-why (To Mr. Geller) Look, I just dont want you to think that were animals who do it whenever we want.
Rachel: (on phone) Chip! Hi, its Rachel. (listens) Rachel Green. Yeah, umm, you left me a message. (listens) Yes you did, my roommate wrote it down. (listens) Monica Geller. (listens) Ohh.
Mrs. Geller: (entering) Hows the hired help?
Mrs. Geller: Hmm.
Mr. Geller: I tell you one thing, I wouldn't mind having a piece of this sun-dried tomato business. Five years ago, if somebody had said to me, here's a tomato that looks like a prune, I'd say "get out of my office!"
Mrs. Geller: Ahh, thats what your Grandmothers hands looked like when we found her.
Mrs. Geller: Whats this? Blue nail polish?
[Scene: The Gellers Kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are still cooking.]
Mrs. Geller: (laughs) Im not freaking out.
Mrs. Geller: (entering) (to Monica) Honey, dont bite your nails.
MR. GELLER: Of course not. With you it's like I've got two 25-year-olds.
Mrs. Geller: No, I have faith
Mrs. Geller: No-no-no, that was all true. This was just in case you pulled a Monica.
[Scene: The Gellers kitchen, Phoebe is bringing in some dirty dishes.]
Mrs. Geller: I thought it was quite tasty.
Mrs. Geller: Yes, well I was wrong, and I have to say you really impressed me today.
Mrs. Geller: Its nothing, its just that now your Father owes me five dollars.
Mrs. Geller: (interrupting) A bitch?
Monica: Well, maybe you could give to somebody else. Ooh, like Ross Geller.
Phoebe: Oh, do I have a middle name. All right Monica Velula Geller. Its that bedroom there. (points to Monicas room)
Monica: Hi. Uh, you... you don't know me, I'm Monica Geller... Ross's sister.
Joey: (interrupting) Hey! Chef Geller! Yknow that little speech you made the other day? Well I got a problem with it!
Joey: (standing up) I will sit with you Dr. Geller. (He goes over to his table and they shake hands.)
Phoebe: (On the phone, in New York) Uh, hello, this is Ross Gellers personal physician, Dr. Philange.
Tour Guide: You mean Dr. Geller?
Mrs. Geller: (reaches out to fiddle with Monica's hair again, and realises) Those earrings look really lovely on you.
MR. GELLER: Well, I can't say any of us were surprised. Your parents have been unhappy ever since we've known them. Especially after that incident in Hawaii.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, she just graduated, and she wants to be something in cooking, or food, or.... I don't know. Anyway, I told her you had a restaurant-
RICHARD: [walks out of the bathroom and runs into Mrs. Geller who is going to the bathroom] Judy, going to the bathroom, good for you.
MRS. GELLER: Almost time for cake.
Mr. Geller: C'mon kid, let's go.
Mrs. Geller: (to Ross on the stairs) I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
Mrs. Geller: Get a shot of Monica. Where's Monica.
Mr. Geller: Let's show 'em.
Mr. Geller: Hi Rachel!
Mrs. Geller: Monica! I think Rachel's here!
Mrs. Geller: Oh, dear. Jack, how do I turn this off?
Mrs. Geller: Ahh, are you hadsome.
Mrs. Geller: Jack, thats what they call the subway.
Mrs. Geller: I'm so glad you could come Chandler, we've got plenty of food so I hope you're hungry.
Mrs. Geller: You too sweethart!
Mr. Geller: Oh my!
Mrs. Geller: Sweetheart. Oh sorry were late, my fault, I insisted on riding the tube.
Mr. Geller: Ohh, I thought that you....
RACHEL: Now I'm mommy in this little play? Alright look, I refuse to get sucked into this like, weird little Geller dimension thing OK. So I'm gonna go and take a nice long hot bubble bath because you kids are driving me crazy. [goes in the bathroom]
Mrs. Geller: Oh, well, I'm so glad you brought him here then.
Mr. Geller: Theres no way in hell, Im paying for it.
Phoebe: yeah well (pause) yeah you know Emma's birth certificate might say Geller but her eyes say Mookurgee.
Mrs. Geller: I just hope...
Mrs. Geller: We know how expensive weddings can be, besides this may be the only wedding we get to throw (patting Monica on the shoulder.).
Mr. Geller: This bill for my half of the wedding. its insane.
Mr. Geller: And you tell him no one takes advantage of the Gellers.
Mrs. Geller: (To Mr. Geller) This is worse than when he married the lesbian.
Mr. Geller: Okay, okay.
Mrs. Geller: Ooh, Jack....(He looks over to her) Sometimes I forget how powerful you can be. (They embrace and kiss passionately.)
Mr. Geller: Boy, bad time to say the wrong name, huh Ross?
Mrs. Geller: Jack, is it all our fault? Were we bad parents?
(Cut to Mr. and Mrs. Geller.)
Mr. Geller: (entering) Hi Rachel.
Mrs. Geller: Rachel's coming up the path. Doesn't she look pretty. Jack... (Rachel enters with a huge nose)
Mr. Geller: (going downstairs) Rachel, ready or not, here comes your knight in shiningOh no. (Chip has shown up and the four are leaving.)
Mrs. Geller: So Rachel, your mom tells me you changed your major again.
Mrs. Geller: How could it be so much? The receptions at their house.
Mr. Waltham: Goodbye Geller.
Mr. Geller: Well Judy, you did it! She's finally full!
[Scene: The Geller household kitchen, Mrs. Geller is cooking and Rachel, post nose job, is helping her.]
Mr. Geller: Wow, love your new nose!
Joey: Well I guess I shouldve thought about my wife and kids before I talked back to chef Geller!
Mrs. Geller: Jack.
Mr. Geller: (To Chandler) God, your hair sure is different!
Mrs. Geller: I'll get it.
Mrs. Geller: Yes, yes Monica is thin. It's wonderful. But what we really want to hear about is Ross's new girlfriend.
Mrs. Geller: (entering) Well, everyone seems to be enjoying your dish.
Mrs. Geller: Theres nothing to discuss. Were not paying for your wine cellar.
Mr. Geller: Dude!
Mr. Geller: Of course it did. They're made of wicker.
Mr. Geller: All right, enough! I dont want to hear about it anymore! (Under his breath) Good luck, Chandler. (Chandler takes another drink.)
Monica: Yeah, the best you got in high school was Wet Pants Geller.
Mr. Geller: Oh, I'm not falling for that one!
MRS. GELLER: I have no idea. Did you know Richard has a twinkie in the city?
Mrs. Geller: Oh my God! There's a toe in my kitchen.
Ross: Oh hi! Ross Geller. And this is my friend Phoebe.
Joey: Shhh! This is a museum, no talking. Right down here, (Motions to a fossilised dinosaur foot.) we have a large foot. (Sees Ross working in one of the display cases.) Uhh, and over here we have Ross Geller. (Knocks on the glass) Everyone wave Hi to Ross. Ross is one of our most important scientists, look at him, hard at work. (Ross does the old "Putting a cigarette in your ear and pulling it out of your mouth trick.") Okay, moving right along. Come on.
Mrs. Geller: (incredulous) You dont know how that happened?! Your dog thought my diaphragm was a chew toy!
MRS. GELLER: Over here Jack. OK. I see, Rachel's coming up the path. Oh doesn't she look pretty. Jack, get this. [Rachel enters with a huge nose]
Mr. Geller: Ohh forget it. Too hell with tradition, were happy to do it.
[Scene: The Geller household, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are getting ready for Thanksgiving dinner. The doorbell rings.]
Joey: Oh, little party favours, check it out! (Its a shirt that reads, "Ross Geller, Bachelor Bash 1998")
Monica: Go! I have it in my book. Go! (Rachel leaves and Monica calls Mrs. Green.) (To Phoebe) Wait a minute! If youre in charge of the invitations why am I the one who has to call herHello Mrs. Green! Hi, its Monica Geller.