words in movies
RACHEL: How have you never been on Oprah?
PHOEBE: It's not a blue screen... it's just, maybe it was just really clear that day. OK, I have to talk to my grandmother. [turns to leave]
PHOEBE: Ya know, in all the years that we have been grandmother and granddaughter, you have never lied to me.
CHANDLER: Don't you have to be Claymation to say stuff like that?
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
CHANDLER: Hey, don't worry. I figure it'll be 2 hours to Phoebe's dad's house, they'll meet, they'll chat, they'll swap life stories, we'll still have plenty of time.
PHOEBE: Can you believe this. In, like, two hours I'm gonna have a dad. Eeeshk.
PHOEBE: Alright, here, you have to hold this. [hands Chandler a piece of paper]
PHOEBE: Oh, no no, that side doesn't have one, the paramedics had to cut through it. [Chandler jumps out of the car]
RACHEL: [on phone] Hi, Mr. Treeger. Hi, it's Rachel Green from upstairs. Yes, somebody, uh, broke our knob on the radiator and it's really hot in here. Yes, it's, it's hot enough to bake cookies. Well, do you think we could have a new one by 6? Wha t, no, no, Tuesday, we can't wait until Tuesday, we're having a party tonight.
MR. TREEGER: Ahh, is it hot? My body always stays cool, probably 'cause I have so much skin. Hey, cheese!
PHOEBE: Yeah, maybe, yeah. You know, and, and I'll knock on the door and, and he'll hug me and I'll have a dad. Ya know and I'll, I'll go to his pharmacy and everyone will be really nice to me 'cause, you know, I'm Franks daughter.
JOEY: Yeah, and when you do, he'll be lucky to have you.
MONICA: Hey, we could have used that kind of thinkin' earlier.
RACHEL: Wiper blades. I don't even have a car.
Monica: Umm, so how long have you been working with your dad? (He looks at her) Come on, one of us had to mention him.
Monica: Really? I'm really tired of being your relationship tutor. You're gonna have to figure this one for yourself. All right? Y'know what? If you're too afraid to be in a real relationship, then don't be in one. (She walks out.)
Monica: Aunt Syl, stop yelling! All I'm saying is that if you had told me vegetarian lasagna, I would have made vegetarian lasagna. (pauses, listens to person on phone) Well, the meat's only every third layer, maybe you could scrape.
Ross: (To Rachel) You uh, you may have been right about Jill.
Joey: (comes out holding the tape) Here's how I know you didn't watch the tape, ok? (puts it into the vcr) If you had seen what was on this tape, believe me, you would have some comments. Alright, now remember, I got paid a lot of money for this and it only aired in Japan. (presses play and he appears on the TV screen and a TV commercial begins)
Monica: Rachel, if you want the little round waffles, you gotta have to wait until I find the little waffle iron.
Rachel: But! Dont you have to give him his money back?
Ross: I do have a newfound respect for life.
Rachel: Oh y'know what, we dont have to talk about work. We can talk about anything!
Chandler: Hey, I may have no money, but I still have my pride.
Ross: I have to say Tupolo Honey by Van Morrison.
CHANDLER: I, I'm sorry, I uh [unchains the door and opens it all the way] I already have a roommate. [Joey turns around in the leather recliner]
Jill: Cant have?! Excuse me, the only thing I cant have is dairy! (Starts to storm out.)
Rachel: Joey no, this is wrong! You have to take it back, okay? You dont want to win an award this way. Youre very talented. And someday youre gonna win one of these for real and that one is gonna mean something.
Monica: Honey, Im not returning them. Okay? I mean I-I know they cost a lot, but Im going to wear them all the time. Youll see. Besides, I love the compliments. I mean, have you ever had something so beautiful everyone wanted it?
Joey: Uh, yeah but uh, (In Drakes voice) I may have said those things before but, I never truly meant them. Until now.
Monica: Did anybody else feel they just wanted to peel the skin off their body, to have something else to do?
Joey: All right, you know what? We don't have a choice. It's like I would have said in that sci-fi movie if I'd gotten the part. "Those are our men in there, we have to get them out! Even if I have to sacrifice the most important thing in my life; my time-machine."
Chandler: I have some moves.
Monica: Umm, do you have any uhh, moves?
Ross: Hey Joe did Did you ever have a threesome?
Phoebe: So is Joey going to have to give up the apartment?
Joey: Yeah? What did ya have?
Rachel: Oh, its so easy for you I mean, youre not married, you get to have sex with who ever you want!
Chandler: Oh, come on, theres a rest stop right up there! Come on, I really have to goooooooooo.
Jack: Uh, Phoebe you-you dont have an office.
Ross: Hey, what have you guys been up to?
RACHEL: I can not believe I have to walk down the aisle in front of 200 people looking like something you drink when your nauseous.
Ross: Yknow what? I-I-I I-I have had enough of this! Yknow, I-I-I care a great deal about your daughter and I have treated her with nothing but respect! So if-if youve got a problem with me, frankly
Gary: Does it have melted cheese and marinara sauce?
Chandler: Do we have to make the entire thing?
Monica: Ohh, I've always wanted to go to this culinary fair that they have in Jersey!
Ross: Look, all I know is I-I cant have another failed marriage!
Monica: Its harder for me! I have those four other women to compete with!
Chandler: You have done enough!
Chandler: Well, its like that old saying, have some sex, eat some cake.
Ross: Why dont you come, I mean, I-I have two tickets, why not?
Ross: Its not something you are! Its something you have!
Ross: Oh, wait! Wait! Dont you have an audition today? Yeah! Maybe youll get that job!
Monica: Maybe Joey doesnt have to give you the money, TV stars have assistants right?
Phoebe: Okay then I dont have a choice! I have to buy that lamp!
Joey: No thats not what I was going to say at all. No, what I was going to say is when youre 90 youll still have the memory of what it was like to be with a 20-year-old.
Phoebe: No, Joey! You borrowed my cab; you have to drive it back.
Richard: Just your dad. (pause) Although thats actually racquetball. You know I-I do have a blind date with my sisters neighbour next Tuesday.
Joey: Vell, Eva, ve've done some excellent vork here, and I vould have to say, your pwoblem is qviiite clear. (He goes into a song and dance number.)
Joey: Did you tell the guy you wanted to have sex with his wife and then fall right out of your chair?
Ross: Hey does anyone have any gum?
Fireman #1: So uh, youre not gonna be able to live here for a while, you ladies have a place to stay?
Rachel: I have.
Monica: Well, Id like to but, (extremely quietly) Im not sure we have time to go.
Monica: Ugh, I can not believe this! I mean, who is she to judge us? We could not have been nicer to her!
Chandler: Well uh, Archie needs money to fix his jalopy (Joey laughs), uh but he doesnt want Reggie to just give him the money. So Reggie hires him as his assistas his butler. And then makes him do all these crazy things like bring him milkshakes that cant have lumps in them.
Joey: (in a funny voice) Yeah, so it turns out that it wasnt the hair straightener that started the fire. (Rachel prompts him on what to say next.) No-no, it was the candles. Its very not good leaving candles unattended. In fact, one of the first things they teach you in fire school is (Phoebe suddenly enters.) Uhh Uhh Okay. Well, I have to go now. (Phoebe leaves.)
Tall Guy: Hey, pal, you have about three seconds to get away from my partner.
JOEY: What? I have seven Catholic sisters. I've taken care of hundreds of kids. Come on, we wanna do it, don't we?
ROSS: Well because I have to work on Monday, I have a big presentation.
MR. GREENE: I have to be heading to my chateau, thank you.
Gate attendant #1: Madame, if you don't have your boarding pass...
Ross: Oh, you have some studying to do?
Elizabeth: No, I have some turning 21 to do.
Phoebe: I have to tie my shoe, so you go ahead, I'll catch up.
Monica: We have got to wash that! (Referring to the sock bunny.)
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Okay, you have to switch with me! Monica is driving me crazy!
JOEY: It just seems so futile, you know ? All these women, and nothing. I feel like Superman without my powers, you know? I have the cape, and yet I cannot fly.
Phoebe: Have you seen your guys body?
Rachel: Okay. Okay. (They sit down.) I think we can do this if we just get organized. All right? We have two days to plan this party. We just need to make fast decisions! Okay? All right, where are we gonna have it?
Monica: Yeah Joey shes Rachels got this really big work problem, and it is a head scratcher. Wow! (To Chandler) Yknow what, if were gonna make dinner were gonna have to leave. Yeah. (She and Chandler exit.)
Tim: I was gonna have Thanksgiving at my girlfriends.
Sebastian: Look, I just wanted to have coffee with Rachel.
Phoebe: Nothing, you just have to be cool with it.
CHANDLER: Hey look, are we gonna have to bring this out every time Ross comes over?
Joey: Well, with Dr. Drake they always tell me what to say. And with Joey, I pretty much have to make it up on my own.
Phoebe: Oh! Okay! Yeah, thats okay. (To Patrick) Have a seat. (Sits Patrick down next to Rachel.)
All: (Chandler stops her) No-no-no-no! Have a seat! Have a seat!
Ross: So uh, have a great time down there.
Rachel: Hey! Have you guys seen Jill? I cant find her anywhere.
Rachel: No, its not gonna be okay Ross, tomorrow is my last day, and I dont have a lead. Okay, y'know what, Im just gonna, Im just gonna call Gunther and Im gonna tell him, Im not quitting.
Ross: Yeah, none of us have to deal with pressure at our jobs.
Rachel: Thanks for lunch, Chandler. Y'know, you didnt have to walk me all the way back up here.
Dr. Roger: They have parasites?
Chandler: Youre right, I have no excuses! I was totally over the line.
Rachel: I don't know. It's so complicated. I work with this guy, you know, I have the baby, and I have Ross, and I just...I don'tknow what to do and I have to be at the office and see Gavin in ten minutes.
Rachel: Im sure he will forgive you. Look, we have all been there! Yknow, you fight, you make up, its just the way it works.
Chandler: Yknow what? I-I kinda have.
Monica: Yeah but see I have nothing to compare it too. So even if youre horrible, how would I know?
Elizabeth: Yeah, we have time off and a lot of people are going on trips
Joey: Wow! (Back to reading the scene.) Well then Ill just have to carry you.
Ross: Thank you! And I have to say that first scene when you meet Mac
Chandler: No. You decided to go into the out-of-work actor business. Now that wasn't easy, but you did it! And I'd like to believe that when the right woman comes along, you will have the courage and the guts to say "No thanks, I'm married."
Ross: All right, you know that one was coming, but that doesnt mean you have unagi. (Does the finger thing.)
Paul: Oh, you dont have to do that every time.
Ross: Okay, so on our no-date evening, three of you now have dates.
Joey: (Checks to see if shes drooling on his shirt.) Okay. Okay, okay, hey. (Lays her down and covers her with a blanket.) There we go, lets get your feet up there. (Looks at her) Good night, Kate. Sweet dreams. (Picks up a garbage can) Im gonna put this can right here in case you have to hurl.
Monica: I dont know. (Picks up a big plate from the coffee table.) Hey, Rachel, you want the big plate? I want you to have the big plate.
Ross: Well I have to. Okay? If I dont, theyll take the class away from me. And I already put it in my family newsletter.
Mike: Phoebe you don't have to eat...
Joey: Thanks, but I kinda have a problem to deal with here.
Rachel: Ross-Ross, you have no idea what this means to me! I mean, I mean I was gonna be homeless. You just saved me! Youre my hero!
Paul: You have a son?
Phoebe: I don't even have a 'pl'.