words in movies
Monica: Wow, youre really crazy about her, huh?
Joey: Oh, you have no idea. And-and when were on stage I get to-to kiss her and-and touch her, but then she goes home with the director, and its like somebodys ripping out my heart!
Monica: Oh, she was a cruel, cranky, old bitch! (Ross gives her a look) (to Ross) And Im sorry she died. Did Dad say I get the dollhouse?
[Scene: Rachels office, Chandler and her are coming back from lunch.]
Chandler: Oh, thats-thats okay, no problem. (He starts to look around her office.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is showing off her new dollhouse. Its a huge dollhouse, that takes up the entire living room table.]
Phoebe: Okay, (starts to pack up her stuff) fine. Come dinosaur, were not welcome in the house of no imagination.
Joey: (looks at her, shocked) What?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with her own dollhouse, that she made herself.]
(Monica is looking on with a hurt expression on her face.)
[Scene: Rachels office, Joannas telling Rachel, her side of the story.]
Joey: Hey, Im not interested in her sweater! Its whats underneath her sweater that counts. And besides, since ah, since when do you care who Im going out with?
(Joey grabs her and kisses her.)
Joey: Okay. (he gives her a peck on the cheek)
Kate: Well, Adrians looking for a reason to stay, right? Victor cant just kiss her, hes gotta, gotta really give her a reason, y'know?
Joey: Maybe he could slip her the tongue.
Kate: Or maybe, maybe he could grab her, and, and, and, and lift her up.
Joey: Yeah, yeah, and then Adrian, she maybe she could wrap her legs around his waist.
Joey: And then, then he could use his teeth, his teeth to undo her dress, and, and, and bite her!
Kate: And then right, right when the scene ends, he could take her with this raw, animal....
(He walks up behind Monica and gives her a big hug and a kiss on the neck.)
Joey: Yep. I just, I just watched her sleep for like hours, just breathing in and breathing out. And then I knew she was dreaming cause, cause her eyes keep going like this. (He closes his eyes and moves them around, kinda like hes been processed by the devil, or something.)
Rachel: Ohh, gee. I wonder why she thinks youre going to call her?
Chandler: To her face? Look its the end of the date, Im standing there, I know all shes waiting for is for me to say Ill call her and its just y'know, comes out. I cant help it, its a compulsion.
Rachel: (grabbing the magazine out of his hands) Call her! Call her now!
Rachel: Come on, this isnt funny. She thinks its my fault that you havent called her. You have to call her!
Rachel: Well then youre going to have to take her out again.
Chandler: Nooo!! Shes really dull! And she gets this gross mascara goop thing in the corner of her eye!
Rachel: I dont care! I dont care! You are going to have to take her out again and end it, and end it in way that she knows its actually ended. And, I dont care how hard it is for you, do not tell her that you will call her again!
[He tries to blow it out, and obviously, it doesnt work. He runs over to the sink to get a glass of water to put out the fire, but since Monica is in the shower the water pressure is very low and takes a long time to fill the glass. In desperation he takes the half full glass over and dumps it on the fire, it doesnt work. He then picks up the dollhouse and considers bringing it over to the sink, but decides to take it into the bathroom and use the shower to put it out. He kicks open the door and we hear Monica scream at the top of her lungs.]
Joey: So I ah, talked to Lauren, kinda told her how things were with us. Did you ah, did you talk to Marshall?
Kate: Look umm, I, I was, I was just caught up in the moment. Thats all it was. Joey, Im-Im sorry you feel bad, but havent you ever sleep with a women where it meant more to her than it did to you?
Monica: (runs over to her) I tried to reach you at work. Theres....been a fire.
(She picks up a charred piece of plastic that once was the Foster puppets, and starts to break down. Monica goes over and comforts her.)
[Scene: Rachels office, Chandler and Joanna are returning from their lunch date. He is telling her about her mascara problem. Rachel is already there.]
Chandler: (He looks over at Rachel, who nods her head) Yes, this, this was pleasant.
Rachel: (whispering) Chandler!! Are you gonna call her!
Rachel: Okay, you are going to tell her and youre going to tell her now. (She grabs his nipple and starts to twist it.)
(Rachel is shocked, and holds her arms out in disbelief.)
Mr. Waltham: All right, Ill tell her. (To his wife) Come on bugger face!
Ross: So Im thinking about asking Rachel out tonight. Y'know maybe play her that song we wrote last week.
Ross: Why dont you call him?! Well, thank you very much! Y'know now he is going to prep her, y'know prep her, as in what you do when you surgically remove the boyfriend!
(Ursula Buffay, Phoebes identical twin sister, is waiting on tables in her inimitable manner.)
(She shakes her head no.)
Sophie: Yknow why? Shes got the Christmas bonus list in there. I saw her working on it this morning.
Rachel: That was her idea, I just gave her a nudge.
Joey: So what are you doing bringing her here?! Theres people here!
Phoebe: Huh? Can you just imagine getting down on one knee and handing her this gorgeous piece of weaponry?
(They all kiss her and wish her luck.)
(Phoebe screams in pain, and Frank screams with her.)
(She is still yanking on the bra, but it is stuck in her sleeve. Finally, she gives up.)
[Cut to Monicas restaurant kitchen, its the episode where Joey is working as a waiter at Monicas restaurant. Joey is patting her breast from when she set it on fire.]
(They hand her the babies and leave them alone.)
Phoebe: They're gonna call her Chandler.
Joshua: (noticing her) Hey-whoa-hey-hey, what was that?
All: Hey! (They all go hug her, except for Ross.)
Ross: As my lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, until death parts us. Really, I do. Emily. (Points at her.)
(They slowly and hesitantly move their lips together and kiss gently. Phoebe has her eyes wide open in shock and Chandler is squinting. He finally breaks the kiss after only a short while and pushes Phoebe away.)
Phoebe: Right. (She turns and opens her eyes in shock.)
Monica: Ohh. (Monica covers her eyes in horror.)
Rachel: Monica, this is Dan (points to him), one of the guys that we're gonna be going out with on Saturday. (Mouths "He's yours." to her.) Uh Dan, Monica.
Monica: What?! You can'twhat did you tell her?
Chandler: (showing her the pictures) Heres a picture of Ross. (Shows another one.) And thats me. (Another one.) And thats me and Ross. (Another one.) Oh-ho, that is a picture of our first kiss as a married couple.
Eric: (finds it) What a relief. It has all the numbers of the people in her prayer chain.
Ross: I told her I'd have to think about it. I mean, how the hell am I supposed to make this kind of a decision? (They're all quiet.) I'm actually asking you!
Phoebe: Oh, I can't believe you called her fat.
Phoebe: I know! So this woman probably could like have all kinds of stories about my parents, and she might even know like where my Dad is. So I looked her up, and she lives out by the beach. So maybe this weekend we could go to the beach?
Joey: All right look, Ross, hes right. Emilys great, shes great! But this way too soon, youre only gonna scare her!
(Joey enters and Chandler pushes her away.)
Monica: (entering from her room) Hey, guess what I'm doing this weekend! I'm going to this culinary fair in New Jersey.
Ross: Is Rachel here? I gotta talk to her.
Rachel: Well, cant you tell her that you are not in the mood?
Ross: Umm (Rachel blows her nose.)
Chandler: (turning to face her) Yeah.
Rachel: Ohhh.(she rhythmically taps her hands on the magazine on her lap.)
Phoebe: Wow! And hey, its cool if youre a lesbian! (Gives her a thumbs up)
Chandler: Monica. (Follows her out.)
Rachel: All right, look. Why don't you just return the book, let Joey give her the clock pen, and you give her something worse than that. Like... a regular pen.
Rachel: Mmm-hmmm. Oh, so typical. Ooo, I'm a man. Ooo, I have a penis. Ooo, I have to win money to exert my power over women. (hands over her money)
Chandler: (stops her) We're in a relationship?
(They both go to her apartment.)
Phoebe: Im a lady Monica, I dont kiss and tell. But this hickey speaks for itself. (She starts to open up her blouse.)
Ross: After what I did? Can you blame her?
Ross: Oh, thank you. (She goes to kiss him, but he holds her coat up between their faces to stop her.) Hey, hey. (opens the door, sees Rachel, and hides Chloe behind the door) Rachel!!!!
Phoebe: yeah well (pause) yeah you know Emma's birth certificate might say Geller but her eyes say Mookurgee.
Ross: (To Rachel, standing by her feet) I dont know why you cant admit that you need me.
Rachel: No! Put that box down! We are not going anywhere! This is my apartment and I like it! This is a girls apartment! That is a boys apartment, its dirty and it smells. This is pretty. Its-its so pretty! And look, and its-its purple! And Im telling you, you with the steady hand, I am not moving, and now I have got the steady hand. (She holds out her hand, which is shaking uncontrollably.)
Joey: (To Chandler) I bet it was about her a little.
(She starts to play her song, but is stopped by Monica.)
Rachel: Yep. Oh, yeah, look you great. (She puts her arm in his and checks how they would look as a couple.) Oh yeah. Yeah, this looks great. (Pause) Umm, so you like it?
MONICA: I don't have her number, butt-munch.
Monica: Go! I have it in my book. Go! (Rachel leaves and Monica calls Mrs. Green.) (To Phoebe) Wait a minute! If youre in charge of the invitations why am I the one who has to call herHello Mrs. Green! Hi, its Monica Geller.
(Ross puts her on speakerphone.)
Phoebe: Here. (She wraps her coat around his shoulders.)
Dr. Green: So, why do you let her go to a chiropractor for?
Emily: (Giggles.) Ohh...(She realizes that shes in her gown.) Oh! You were not meant to see me before the wedding. Its bad luck.
(She heads for the kitchen and Chandler watches her leave and admires the view.)
Ross: Whoa-whoa-whoa! Emily, (Gives her the time-out signal.) honey, okay?
Rachel: Hey, honey! Whats the matter? (Monica shows her, her hat.) Fine, I was just trying to be nice! Whoa!
Larry: This does. (Shows her his badge.)
(Monica is taking a drink as Ross says that, laughs, and snorts her drink.)
Phoebe: Yeah, her first day on a new spiritual plane and she's gonna come to the coffeehouse!
Ross: Oh mom! Okay, umm, her name is Carol. And she's really pretty. And smart. And uh, she's-she's on the lacrosse team and the golf team. Can you believe it? She plays for both teams!
Rachel: Oh! Get over it soldier, we've gotta do this! (She pulls him towards her and throws him onto the barcalounger) Ok. Aha! You like that huh?
Rachel: Yeah. (She goes out to join her in the hall and starts looking for the dropped socks.)
(He starts to carry her into the hallway but hits her head on the door.)
Mrs. Waltham: This is ridiculous. I mean we had an agreement. (Ross looks frustrated. She begins to scream at her husband.) Will you say something, Steven?! Please!!!
Monica: What are you guys doing? (Monica hears the moaning coming from the TV and looks at it) Oh my God, is that Richard? (It only takes a split second for Joey to realise, he pulls Monica down by her jacket, and she falls, face down next to Chandler. Chandler gets up a bit, and Joey quickly covers Chandler's eyes with his hand.)
[Cut to the girls apartment, Monica is putting things into her purse as Phoebe and Rachel watch.]
Phoebe: Its not kicking me, its kicking one of the other babies. Oh (looks down her dress)! Dont make me come in there!
Monica: All right then, go fight for her! Go to London! I mean, that could be you and Emily! (Points to the TV.) That, but-but nicer. Just, go to London!
Chandler: So uh, now that little Chandler turned out to be a girl, what are they gonna name her?
Phoebe: Youre thinking about this way too much. Just tell him and get it over with. Its like, its like ripping off this Band-Aid. (On her arm) Quick and painless, watch. (Rips it off.) Oh mother of See?
Rachel: (Looking through her purse.) Okay, you know what? I dont have it, but I can tell you exactly where it is on my night stand, and...okay. But you know what? I have my drivers license and I have a twenty. (She slides it across the counter.)
Phoebe: I don't know! I didn't come with her!
Chandler: All right everybody! Just be quiet! Be quiet! Be quiet!! Pipe-pipe-pipe down! (They settle down) What is the matter with you people?! This woman was trying to do a nice thing for you. She was making candy so she could try to get to know all of you, and Ill bet that not one of you can tell me her name! Am I right?
Ross: Oh, hey y'know, they-they really overcharge you for that stuff. (Rachel glares at him.) But who cares?! Because it's all on me! (Rachel reaches into the fridge and pulls out two handfuls of those mini booze bottles.) (Watching her.) That is, one big drink!
Monica: (Taking out her wallet.) Well good, here let me help you out.
Monica: Yes Phoebe, but this is all I have. Okay? (She pours out the rest of her change purse into the bucket.)
Phoebe: Theres a reset button?! Ugh, thank you! Thank you! (He exits and she goes to shut it off.) Theres a reset button! My God! Why didnt I see that! (She takes off the plastic cover and looks for the button.) Reset button, reset button, where is there a reset button? (Finds it.) Oh here it is! (Picks it up off of the floor.) Oh! (She presses it hard, but of course it would help if the button was still attached to the detector. In frustration she presses it so hard it causes pain in her thumb.) Ohh, God!
(They start to leave Central Perk. The band starts to play "Here, There and Everywhere" by the Beatles. The crowd rises from their seats. Phoebe and Chandler walk down the aisle. Phoebe really glows with happiness. So does Mike who watches her walk down the isle. When Phoebe and Chandler arrive, they kiss and Phoebe walks to her bridesmaids.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is coming out of the bathroom after a shower wearing only her bath robe, walks into the kitchen, and opens the fridge. As she bends over to grab a bottle of wine, her robe falls open (Damn this network primetime programming, we didn't see anything!) and she quickly closes it again. But then realizes she didn't have to do that. So she closes the fridge and stands next to the table, thinks about it for a little while and ]
Monica: Well, if we owe it? (She throws down her cleaning stuff and jumps into his arms.) Oh my When is Joey gonna be home?
Rachel: (touches his knee) Im pregnant. (Ross stops.) Ross? (Ross is staring off into space.) Ross? (Ross is still frozen) Okay, whenever youre ready. (Sits back and opens her magazine.) And youre the father by the waybut you got that
(He kisses her.)
Rachel: You're sister? You're sister's asleep on the couch? (Danny nods, "Yes.") Ohhh! I saw her with you on the subway and now she's asleep on the couch!
Danny: You are! (Hits her back.)
Rachel: (not sure what to do) Uh, it was very nice meeting you. (They continue to ignore her.)
Rachel: (entering from her room) Hey!
(Rachel goes into her room and closes the door. Which allows Monica to let Chandler out of her room.)
Phoebe: I dont know, it would totally depend on her coloring and (realizes) You got the job!!
Chandler: No, I know, but it's just so hard, you know? I mean, you're sitting there with her, she has no idea what's happening, and then you finally get up the courage to do it, and there's the horrible awkward moment when you've handed her the note.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is returning. Monica enters from her room wearing nothing but a robe.]
Joey: Yeeeeaaaahhh! What's messing you up? The wine? The candles? The moonlight? You've just got to go up to her and say, 'Rachel, I think that...' (Rachel comes into the room behind them)
Monica: (yelling and waving her hand in the air) I know! I know! I know!
Phoebe: Oh? Isn�t that funny? I didn't see that before, I wouldn't have let her go up again.
Phoebe: Okay. (Joey tries to take the guitar.) Oh no-no-no, you don't touch the guitar! First you learn here, (Points to her head.) then you learn here. (Points to the guitar.)
Monica: Back then, I thought that I would never, ever get the chance to go out with a Chip Matthews, and now hes-hes called me up and asked me out. And the fat girl inside of me really wants to go. I-I owe her this. I never let her eat.
Phoebe: Now, that's trash. Young lady, you can't (The lady ignores her and walks off.) Hey! Stop that young lady, she donated trash!