words in movies
Rachel: (entering from her room) Pheebs, I wanna ask you something.
Phoebe: Maybe because you never listen to anything that I say. I talk about her all the time! DENISE!!!!!
Phoebe: So, what did Rachel say when you told her you were still married to her?
Phoebe: You didnt tell her did you?
Phoebe: Of course not, because youre in love with her.
Ross: I am not in love with her. She was very upset about having to move out so I eh, didnt tell her we were still married because she would only get more upset. I-I just comforted her, as a friend.
Phoebe: What do you mean, comforted her?
Ross: Its nothing, I just gave her a hug.
Phoebe: Okay, just tell me this, did you or did you not smell her hair?
Ross: S-s-smell her hair? What if I did?
Phoebe: Ninety percent of a womens pheromones come out the top of her head! Thats why, thats why women are shorter. So that men will fall in love when they hug them! (Ross is staring at her dumbfounded.) Oh come on Ross, youre a scientist.
Ross: I was hugging her as a friend. Its not my fault her-her hair got in my face, shes got a lot of it and it smells all-all uh coconutty. (Phoebe raises her eyebrows.) What?! Oh, that doesnt mean I have feelings for Rachel! Maybe it means I have feelings for coconuts!
(She hugs him and he starts to hug her back but notices the look Phoebe is giving him and pushes her away.)
Phoebe: Umm, Im talking about that which you already know but wont admit. You love her again; you re-love her!
Ross: Look, I do not re-love her.
Phoebe: No. No, I wont. But I should tell you this, this exact same thing happened to my roommate Denise. She moved in with a guy who was secretly married to her and he said he didnt love her, but he really did, and it just blew up! And thats how she ended up living with me! (Ross looks at her.) (Pause) Okay, thats a lie.
Chandler: Yeah, I mean were gonna have to move around some furniture to make room for my chair. (Kisses her and heads into the living room.)
Chandler: Well, why dont you tell her to stop being silly! (Monica mocks him and he joins in.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is sitting at the counter waiting for Gunther, yep Gunthers back, to refill her coffee.]
Ross: Sure! Here. (Hands her his keys.)
Joey: Thats not gonna work out! Then shes gonna come home all weepy and youll be tellin her, "Oh thats okay. Youll find someone." And then, bamn! She finds you!
Joey: Ooh, sorry! No-no-no, so close though, butbye-bye! (He ushers her out the door.)
Rachel: I mean y'know, I'm thinking. You could bring her, and you guys could go up to your old room, and not make out.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there with her guitar.]
Chandler: Okay, all right, I'll just uh, make sure that uh, Joey gets her something really great.
(Joey starts wiping lint off of her back, but goes at little too far and Rachel just glares at him. He stops, gives her the okay symbol and walks away.)
Joey: Okay. (he gives her a peck on the cheek)
Ross: Ohh. (He drops the shoes, takes the brush from her, and licks the tip. He doesnt like how it tastes.)
Joey: We've only been going out for a couple of weeks, do you think I gotta get her something?
Monica: She's this girl who used to live in the building before you did. Then she moved to England and she picked up this fake British accent. On the machine this is her message. (she apes Amanda using an awful British accent) "Monica, darling! It's Amanda calling!"
Ross: Hey, is Rachel here? Um, I wanted to wish her a happy birthday before I left.
Benjamin: I'm sorry. I just haven't seen her for so long! All these feelings are rushing back! I'm starting to realize how much I missed her, and I'm gonna need you to break up with her.
Woman: Great! (Calls down the hall) Dad! (Her old father walks in.) Thank you so much, Ill be back to pick him up in an hour. (She walks away.)
Chandler: All right. I will go out and I will try to find something for her, okay?
Joey: So, you just left? Her place was really that bad?
Joey: All right, so... next time, you take her to your place.
Joey: You wanna see her again, right?
Monica: All right! Okay, its just Phoebe. Wills still on a diet, Chandler doesnt eat Thanksgiving food, and Rachels having her aversion to poultry.
Ross: Hey Emma. Oh, why is she wearing her hat so low? She can barely see. (Wants to take the hat off, but Rachel tries to stop him).
Monica: Rachel, I have not missed one question the whole game. I own this game! Look at my hand. (Holds up her hand.)
ALL: [congradulating her and celebrating]
Rachel: Okay... aahhh... Please laugh for mommy... Please? Please laugh for mommy... (Rachel makes a funny face, sticking her tongue out, making a farting noise and using her hands as antlers, wiggling her fingers... No response from Emma...) Not funny huh? Oh so, is it... only offensive novelty rap? Or maybe just, you know, rap in general? 'Cause mommy can rap... (Rachel tries to rap and makes weird movements with her arms in the process.) My name is mommy and I'm here to say / that all the babies are... Oh, I can't rap... Allright sweetheart... This is only because I love you so much, and I know that you're not gonna tell anybody... (Rachel's face is telling "Oh what am I doing? The things I have to go through... and she starts to rap) I like... big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... / when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face... (Emma starts to laugh) Yes! Yes! Yes! YES! Oohhhhh! Oh! (Rachel now really gets into it, and her insecure movements start getting better) I like big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... Oh Emma you're laughing! Oh you are, you really do like big butts, don't you. Oh you beautiful little weirdo... (Rachel picks up Emma and Ross now enters)
(Chandler gives Joey her business card, which he eagerly grabs and he leaves.)
Chandler: Why cant you tell her?
(They exchange looks, smile, and shrug their shoulders before Ross suddenly lunges forward in an attempt to kiss her, but she expertly backs away.)
JOEY: Hey I liked her, alright. Maybe, maybe too much. I don't know I guess I just got scared.
Chandler: Oh yeah man. (to Kathy) Joey. (Hands her the phone.)
Chandler: Oh, thats-thats okay, no problem. (He starts to look around her office.)
Joey: Priesthood! Look Ross, I'm telling you, she has no idea what you're thinking. If you don't ask her out soon you're going to end up stuck in the zone forever.
Ross: Correct. Her actual favorite movie is...
Rachel: (shakes her head) Alright, alright look, just uh... just try to remember how you felt when you were in love, and think about that when you're playing the scene.
Joey: And what?! Did you sleep with her?!
Chandler: No! No! No! I just kissed her.
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. You looked at her. You never look. You just answer, it's just a reflex. Do I look fat? Nooo! Is she prettier than I am? Noo! Does size matter?
Ross: Correct. In what part of her body did Monica get a pencil stuck at age 14?
Chandler: Look, Im sorry! But theres nothing I can do, I think Im in love with her!
Woman: (looking through her peephole, we see Ross standing in the hallway.) Yesss?
Rachel: Why don't you just marry her? Oh no, wait a minute you can't, I'm sorry I forgot, she's not a lesbian.
Phoebe: I picked her! Oh thank God you want her! Ooh!
Rachel: (standing in her doorway) People are trying to sleep in here!
Monica: Oh, it was great! The widow wouldn't pay, so Phoebe yelled at her 'til she did.
Chandler: When was the last time you saw her wear it?
Chandler: Wow! Why do you want to get rid of her so badly?
Joey: Back when you and Rachel were together, if Chandler had kissed her, would you hear him out?
Mr. Treeger:: Yeah, you could dance real good with her, shes the same size as me.
(Monica looks at Rachel, who gives her the thumbs up.)
[Chandler and Joey stop dancing and laugh at her]
Chandler: Hey, look, what do you want me to say? Do you want me to say that Ill stop seeing her?
Rachel: Okay. (She goes into her bedroom)
Tim: Hi. (gives her a bottle of wine)
Monica: I saved you a seat. (Motions to the one next to her.)
Rachel: Yeah, sure. Umm, they didnt have poppy seed bagels, so I (Enters Joannas office and sees her handcuffed to her chair wearing nothing but a slip) Oh my word!
Rachel: Chandler! Chandler, please, I have to get you locked up back the way you were, I am sooo gonna lose my job, shes very private about her office. Now I know why.
Rachel: Oh, he sees her!
Joey: Oh yeah, I definitely know her.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is reading What to Expect When Youre Expecting as Rachel enters from her bedroom.]
Ross: Like uh, that gold necklace I got her last year.
Ross: Yes, her molecular epidemiology paper is due tomorrow.
Monica: Oh, hes catching up to her!
Phoebe: Cause youre still into Monica. So you told her there was somebody else so she would agree to work with you, so cause you figure oh if you spent a lot of time together, maybe something might happen, and...
Monica: You obviously havent screwed over a lot of your friends. (They all look at her) Which we all appreciate.
Chandler: Okay, well. Janice said 'Hi, do I look fat today?' And I, I looked at her....
Rachel: Right. So, what you have to do is, you have to accidentally run into her on purpose. And then act aloof.
Chandler: My Catholic friend is right. She's distraught. You're there for her. You pick up the pieces, and then you usher in the age of Ross! (Ross and Chandler look off into the distance. Joey, wondering what they are looking at, looks in the same direction)
Ross: So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he still in love with her?
Monica: Hi Chandler. It's really nice to see you (rolls her eyes) NOT. (she and Rachel giggle a little and Chandler looks unimpressed)
Phoebe: Well, it seems like there weren't any tears 'til you showed her the bill.
Chandler: Oh, yeah! How did you meet her?
(She sits down, and Mark leans over and kisses her. Rachel doesnt react. He tries it again, and Rachel jumps back quickly.)
Mike: Oh wow! Im free for her!
Ross: (seeing Phoebe still with cat) You didnt tell her?! (They all kinda shy away.) Okay, fine! Pheebs?
Phoebe: If shes no fun, why do you want to date her at all?
Ross: Look, I am totally, totally over her, OK, I just... (Rachel comes over, Ross lays head on table): Hiiii!
Monica: Used to work with her. Used to! Im a relative and I didnt get invited! A blood relative! Blood!!
Chandler: I don't know. I can't--I just, I can't get her out of my head. Y'know? I mean, I'm a very bad person. I'm a very, very bad person. I'm a horrible person. (he waits for a reaction, when he doesn't get one) No you're not Chandler! We still love you Chandler!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Rachel are there, as Phoebe enters with her date.]
Joey: Thank you. (stands up and kisses her lips.) Waiter! �lright, this is gonna be fast, so try to keep up: Risotto with the shaped truffles and the roasted rip steak with the golden Chanterelles and a Bordelaise sauce and that any that stuff I just said means snails. (Hope, *I* kept up.)
Chandler: Well, yknow, youre-youre gonna meet somebody! Youre a great catch! Yknow when I was telling all those guys about you, I didnt have to lie once. (He sits down on the arm of her chair)
Monica: I am going I'm going--Turn it over! (Rachel rolled onto her stomach and Monica rolls her back.) I'm I am going to get these drops in your eyes. (She is holding Rachel down with both hands and has the eyedropper in her mouth.)
Rachel: (looking through her wallet.) Ohh, I just dont think I have enough left on my credit card.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is singing her holiday song.]
Phoebe: Because she exchanges every gift she ever gets, its like impossible to get her something she likes. Come on, lets trade!
Chandler: (not knowing the true meaning of her exclamation) I know, but just let me say it.
Ross: Eww! No!! Her ear! All right, Monica categorizes her towels. How many categories are there?
Rachel: Yeah thats great Paul, but yknow I wanna know what(Puts her hands on his shoulders)Wow, those are really great! I just wanna know what, what is behind this-this strong, silent exterior. Yknow they say that still waters run deep and I wanna swim in yours.
Monica: I swear, I promise. I promise. Oh my God, I'm so excited! {And I just can't hide it! I'm about to lose control and I think I like it! Sorry, just couldn't resist it.} All right, listen let me tell you, do not get her flowers. Okay? Because y'know, she cries when they die, and there's the whole funeral
(She picks up a charred piece of plastic that once was the Foster puppets, and starts to break down. Monica goes over and comforts her.)
Cheryl: My hamster. I hope she's okay, I haven't seen her in a while. Have a seat.
[Scene: A lobby, Ross is waiting for Rachel, after her interview.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Phoebe is there with her puppy and is trying to sing it to sleep as Chandler enters.]
Doug: Well, maybe I'll bring it out and have Monica stick her finger in it. That oughta sweeten it up, huh? (Once again, with the laugh.)
Rachel: Let me see that. (Monica shows her) Oh, yeah.
Rachel: Yeah, not girls anyway, guys agree (snaps her fingers) like that.
Chandler: (to Drew) Oh, by the way, that is her full name.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Ross are in the kitchen. Phoebe is sitting at the couch with oven mits on her hands.]
[Scene: Rachels office, Rachel is confronting Joanna about her interview.]
(Ursula opens the door and hands her the note.)
MR. GREENE: ...and her yoga and her Bridges of Madison County...
Ross: Yeah. Look, you don't, you don't talk about like, you know, your girlfriend and the intimate stuff you, you do with her.
Rachel: In the afternoon. Mr. Zelner came into my office after lunch. He put them on my desk, and then I put a Post-It on it (Looks down onto her desk and finds the folder with the Post-It on it that contains the contracts she imagined she gave Tag) that said, "Must go out today." So you just keep looking in there! All right?
Chandler: Hello, Joanna (Realises he doesnt know her last name) s office.
Monica: Okay. (She does so and starts to walk towards Joey to receive her pancakes.)