words in movies
Monica: All right then. (He leans in to kiss her goodnight, but she quickly kisses him on the cheek and pats his shoulder.) Bye.
(She goes into her apartment and sees Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross sitting there.)
(She goes over to the snack table, and Joey quickly runs over and pours her a cup of coffee.)
Joey: I hate this woman!! I hate her! She told everyone in the company about that info-mercial, and now they all keep asking me to open their drinks. Okay, and whenever I cant do it, theyre all like-like laughing at me.
Rachel: Petty... (goes into her room)
Ross: Small... (Rachel comes back into the living room and catches Ross mocking her.)
Ross: Oh-oh, okay, okay! (He quickly takes off his sweater in order to put on the T-shirt. Its an old Frankie says relax T-shirt, that barely fits him. Rachel nods her head in approval of the new look.) If you dont mind Im gonna the rest of my stuff, and relax, in my favourite shirt. (Starts to leave) You have a pleasant evening. (He exits and leaves the door open.)
Monica: Absolutely! (He goes to kiss her, but she stops him and rubs his head and says...) Now get out of here you!! (Pete leaves) (to the gang) Okay, Im running out of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am I only attracted to guys where theres no future? Either theyre too old, or theyre too young, and then theres Pete whos-whos crazy about me, and whos absolutely perfect for me, and theres like zip going on! I mean, seriously, does it sound like somethings wrong with me?!
Joey: Well, why dont you tell me what youre supposed to be! Huh? Because I sure as hell cant figure it out! I talk to you and nothin. You look at me, and its nothin. (He kisses her) Nothing.
[Rachel comes out of her apartment, followed by Mark, and they leave on their date, without saying a word to Ross. Ross is stunned.]
Ross: Its just I miss her so much.
(She sits down, and Mark leans over and kisses her. Rachel doesnt react. He tries it again, and Rachel jumps back quickly.)
(He takes the scissors, cuts the ribbon, shakes her hand, posses for the picture, and leaves.)
Joey: God, I just, I hate her! I hate her!! With her, Oh, Im so talented. and Oh, Im so pretty, and Ooh, I smell so good.
Chandler: Hey, you have nothing but talk about her for the last 48 hours! If you were in a school yard youd be pulling her pigtails and pushing her down now!
Joey: Oh, yeah?! Then how come I keep thinking about her in all these sexual scenarios and stuff huh?!
Joey: Well, why dont you tell me what youre supposed to be! Huh? Because I sure as hell cant figure it out! I talk to you and its nothin. You look at me, and nothin. (He kisses her, more passionately this time) Nothing.
Rachel: (She takes the T-shirt out of the box and holds it to her chest and take a deep breath.) No. Nothing. (She smiles and goes into her room.)
Joey: Hey Monica! (Grabs her and pulls her into the living room.) People came to see a fight, lets give em what they came for!
Ross: Well, with everything thats been going on lately, I havent exactly been the perfect boyfriend. You know, I, uh, I didnt tell her I got Rachel pregnant. I gave her a key to my apartment, and then had the locks changed! And then I lied to her about Rachel moving in with me. In a way, I actually judge her for not breaking up with me sooner, you know?
Phoebe: All right, that makes sense. (Starts towards the door.) Ugh. ButScrew you Im going first! (She grabs her purse and runs out.)
Phoebe: Oh! No problem! I (Cassie emerges from the bathroom and we once again visit slow motion Barry White background music land with the sexy hair-flipping thing going on, only this time Phoebe is entranced. For more information on Denise Richards you can visit your local library or look her up on the Internet at her official website at www.deniserichards.com.)
Joey: Okay! (He yanks his hand away.) All right. Umm, all right Wayne, level with me. Okay? I-I keep hearing all these rumors that I might get fired. Okay, they even have actors coming in to read for my part! Come on man, you-you got to give me a second chance! I mean, I love-I love this little guy! (He grabs C.H.E.E.S.E.s arm and pulls it off at the elbow.) Ah-ah!! (Wayne is shocked.) Okay, thats why you didnt want me to touch him right? Here you go! Okay? (Hands Wayne the arm and he goes to fix it. Meanwhile Joey starts to berate himself.) Stupid! I cant believe it! God! (A very beautiful woman walks by.) (To her) Hey, how you doin? (He and her go over to talk and Wayne looks on with envy.)
Rachel: Well, hey! How about right above the TV? (Points to the spot where her famous French poster is hanging). That way, it will be the first thing that you see when you walk in the door!
Rachel: Yeah, well Bettys kinda sad. Which is why I believe I can lure her away with these chocolates. (Holding up the box of chocolates.) Now, while I distract her, you get in the office.
Phoebe: (entering, with about 20 purses hanging around her neck) Morning. Rach, I'm here with the purses!
Ross: Actually its more like this. (Pushes her hands to less than an inch apart.)
Phoebe: (crossing her fingers and closing her eyes) Please dont be a space ship. Please dont be a space ship. (She turns on the light and looks around and finds that its the smoke detector thats beeping.) Oh thank God! (She moves a chair over and starts to investigate how to make the beeping turn off, in frustration she yanks the thing off of the wall. She sets it down and heads for bed, just as she gets there it beeps again. She opens the cover and removes the battery, but it still beeps.) How could you be beeping?! I just disconnected you! I took out your battery! How can
Joey: I know. And shes so sweet. I just wanna feed her grapes and brush her hair.
Phoebe: Okay, umm, question 2) Umm, did that marriage end A. Happily, B. Medium, or C. In the total abandonment of her and her two children?
Phoebe: You could get arrested, right now! (Flashes the badge and they glare at her.) All right, yeah, I gotta take it back. I'm totally drunk with power. (She heads for the door just as Joey enters.)
Chandler: A freakish thin date with a hanger for her head?
Monica: (interrupting him) No-no-no, dont-dont do the accent. Youve got to see her again.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is recovering from her haircut, Phoebe is playing her doctor and is coming in from the bedroom.]
Chandler: Here you go. (Hands her the money.) Now stop bringing us pizzas you.
Monica: (running from the bathroom to her room, wearing only a towel) Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! (gets to her room and closes the door, as Rachel gets up to answer the door.)
Ross: Oh sure, come here! (Sits her up) Sure you can! Uh, look come here look, (rolls the machine closer) its-its-its, its right there (Points).
CHANDLER: Joey, Joey. Hey, some girl just walked up to me and said, 'I want you Dennis,' and stuck her tounge down my throat. I love this party.
(The crowd goes wild as he puts the ring on her finger. They hug and kiss this time as an engaged couple.)
Chandler: (interrupting her just in time) Hey! Heres a dollar, consider it a deposit. Please sing at our wedding.
Phoebe: Okay but look! Look at what I got! Its her address book! (Holds it up.) We have a guest list!
Rachel: I am still talking!! And then you chase away the one guy that I actually liked! I mean, no offense to you guys. Really! I mean (To Patrick) congratulations on all the cash, (He nods) and-and yknow(Feels Eldads hair)Wow! You do have very soft hair! But I would much rather go to the ball all by myself than go through anymore of this! Good-bye! (Grabs her stuff, starts to leave, then turns back suddenly, and to Eldad) Now do you use some sort of special conditioner on that hair?!
[Scene: Rachels bedroom, shes in her closet bringing down her pair of roller blades from a top shelf.]
Monica: Okay, while were waiting for these pills to kick in, Im gonna sit you down on the couch. Come on. (Phoebe gets up and goes with her.) Get some nice soft pillows under your head, Im gonna turn the TV on and you can watch whatever you want. And ImSit down(She sits down on the couch)gonna make you some tea. And then, Im gonna rub your feet.
Chandler: Well, why don't you send her a musical bug, op, no you already did that. All right look, you're going to have to go there yourself now, okay, make a few surprise visits.
Mona: Okay, but I get to hop on after her. (Ross bites the air in response.)
(Monica starts biting on the eyedropper, spraying the fluid all over. But Rachel keeps turning her head back and forth and Monica keeps missing.)
Ross: (whispering in her ear) Oh, thats right! He called to ask out Monica! That-thats gotta be embarrassing!
Phoebe: Okay. Then, take the tiara back and let me hold the musket again. (He hands it to her and Phoebe poses in front of one of those small mirrors.) Somethings missing. Its not Okay oh, let me see the ring my friend picked out.
[Chandler tries to warn Phoebe that the woman is coming on to her, but Phoebe doesn't see him.]
Passenger: Oh-no.(He bites his fist at her.)And by the way, it seems to be perfectly clear that you were on a break. (Rachel gasps and doesnt know what to say. He puts his headphones back on.)
[Scene: The hospital. Rachel is pouring her self a cup of coffee. Ross approaches from behind.]
Ross: Monica categorizes her towels. How many categories are there?
Rachel: No, theres nothing to make up, shes gonna know that I have a key to her office, Ive got to get you locked up back the way you were! (She tries to drag him over to the chair, but Chandler stops her.)
Phoebe: Earl, youre not hearing me! All Im saying is that youre not alone all right? Everybody hates the people they work with! (One of her coworkers overhears that, and she mimes that she didnt mean him.)
Monica: (chasing her) Youd better run!
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
Amy: (Very excited about it) Doesn't it make her nose look smaller?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel are at the playground with Emma. Rachel in putting her back in the stroller and Ross is tending to his wound]
Phoebe: You know.. you let your guard down, you start to really care about someone, and I just- I- (starts chewing her hair)
Phoebe: Yeah, I like Vince a lot, y'know? But, its just Jasons so sensitive, y'know? And in the long run, I think sensitive its just better than having just like a really, really, really nice (pause) butt. (Her eyes glaze over thinking about the butt.) (pause) Jason! Definitely Jason! Okay, wish me luck!
Joey: Whoa-whoa, but her birthday isn't like for another month.
Phoebe: Yeah, my mom used to put her head in the oven. Well, actually, she only did it the one time. But it was pretty weird.
Joey: (angrily and monotone) Any one of the brilliant actresses nominated for this award tonight deserves to take it home. Unfortunately only one can. (Shakes his head in disgust.) The nominees for Best Supporting Actress are from Passions Erin Goff. (There is applause, which Joey disgustedly waits to dye out.) From One Life to Live Mary Loren Bishop (They start to applaud again, but Joey interrupts in with the rest of the nominees), from All My Children Sarah Mchann, and from Days of Our Lives Jessica Ashley. And the winner is (Opens the envelope) Jessica Ashley from Days of Our Lives. (Applause) Uh, unfortunately Jessica couldnt be with us tonight so Ill be accepting this award on her behalf. (Realizes something) And Im sure that Jessica would like to thank my parents who always believed in me. Shed also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel whos sittin right there! (Points at Rachel.) (The music starts and his microphone is turned off, this angers Joey again and he disgustedly exits.)
Phoebe: (pushes her head back down) Time for your scalp massage!
(Rachel holds her hand in order to support her head. Mr Zellner obviously overheard the conversation.)
[Scene: Rachels office, Tag and her are planning how to get the review back.]
[Monica goes into her room and slams the door. Rachel does the same. Phoebe, without a door to slam, opens a small chest and slams the lid.]
Ross: Yeah. Everything but, the little blue one. (Holds it up for her.)
Mike: (looks at her astonished) Alright, then I'm gonna change my name.
Rachel: Y'know I dont, I dont understand guys, I mean I-I would never congratulate Monica on a great stew by y'know, grabbin her boob.
Rachel: Oh!! I love this job! (her phone rings) Wow! My first call.
Nurse: Youve done all you can Dr. Wesley. You have got to let her go.
Monica: Honey, I dont think thats something we need to worry about! First of all hes-hes never gonna tell her how he feels about her. And even if he did you have no idea how shed react.
Joey: No-no hey buddy, please let me dance with that girl, I really like her and I think I have a shot.
Monica: All right! Let's go! (Runs to the door.) Let's go Team Monica! (The guys all stop and stare at her) All right, we can work out the name later.
Joey: (comforting her) And hey, you need anything, you can always come to Joey. Me and Chandler live across the hall. And he's away a lot.
Joey: Hey-hey dancer girl! Can I go to the bathroom? I just.. (The girl starts dancing really close to him, so he picks her up, twirls her round, and puts her against a platform) Here we go. (He walks away to find Monica and Ross doing a really out of place dance) Looking good Gellers!
Monica: Ok, then, why are you... (she opens her robe revealing a nice black dress) all dressed up??
Rachel: Thats also the smaller piece. (Puts the piece onto a plate.) Okay, there you go. Enjoy your half my friend, but that is it. No sharing. No switching, and dont come crying to me if you eat your piece to fast. (As shes saying that she is backing out the door, when she finishes she turns around to return to her place, stumbles and drops the cheesecake on the floor.) Oh!!!!
Rachel: Yes! (She gets up and sets the phone on the counter without hanging it up.) Bye daddy. (Phoebe and her leave.)
Phoebe: Ooh. Oh. It looks like, like a tiny little person drowning in your cereal. (Ross gives her this look, like 'Yeah, doesn't it', and gets up to dump it down the drain.)
Rachel: That's crazy! You can't do that! What are you going to tell her? (Pause) (Realizes) Oh God. Ohh, you already agreed to this, haven't you?
Rachel: Man, don't be surprised if her hands and her feet get bigger too!
Phoebe: Oh, yeah try that. (He finishes and looks at her.) So, is that better?
Rachel: (coming out of her bedroom with a necklace) Here it is! I love it. I wear it all the time.
Felicity: (Putting her arm around Joey.) Are you going home? I was hoping to get to know you better.
RACHEL: I know, but it's just it's the first time, and I just don't want her to think that because I didn't marry Barry, that my life is total crap, you know?
Chandler: Well, the heart wants what it wants. Ill see you later. (He runs off and leaves her with the bill, which the waiter promptly delivers.)
Cashier: I can tell you work out. (Ross is please and Rachel looks at him confused.) A paleontologist who works out, youre like Indiana Jones. (Rachel has a disbelieving look on her face.)
Ross: You should've seen the look on her face. I don't want Rachel to hate me! I don't know what to do.
Monica: Oh, the way you crushed Mike at ping pong was such a turn-on.You wanna...? (plays with her finger on Chandlers chest)
Ross: You know what the scariest part is? What if there's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman- and that's it? Unfortunately in my case, there was only one woman- for her...
Rachel: Ross, you are so pathetic. Why can't your son just play with his doll? (uses the Milk Master 2000 to pour milk into her cereal)
Ross: Did you get Monica's authorization to move all of her stuff?
Monica: Okay. Phoebe thats it. Come on, get outout of the chair. Get out! (She goes to move Phoebe, but Phoebe goes limp and Monica cant move her.) Oh come Phoebe!
Joey: Aww thats nice. Family should be there, huh? This is her wedding, happiest day of her life.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Continued from earlier, Rachel is now telling everyone of her experience in the garbage room.]
Phoebe: (sighs) Honey, I wish you would get over her. I hate seeing you like this. Is there anything I can do for you? Do you want to look down my top?
RACH: Why didn't he call? He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? He's gonna stay with her and she's going to be all, "Hi, I'm Julie, Ross picked me, and we're gonna to get married, have a lot of kids and dig up stuff together."
Rachel: No I know, because to be a grandmother you have to be married and have children and I dont have any of those things. Thats why its so funny. (Runs into her room crying.)
MONICA: Yeah, well you promised Barry, you'd marry him. (Rachel glares at her, and she retreats to safety between Richard's legs)
ROSS: Alright you know, why don't I just meet you upstairs. [Drops her on the couch and walks out holding his lower back.]
Phoebe: Yes, and apparently he is married to some singer, but he said he would leave her for me. And I said, "James, James Brolin, are you sure?" James Brolin said
Carol: Hey Rachel! (The camera cuts to her face and we see that Ben pulled the quarter trick with her as well.)
Chandler: (to Kim and Nancy) Oh, hi! Excuse me, is uh Rachel Green here? I was supposed to meet her for lunch.
Maitre D�: Good evening, Miss. (Phoebe turns her head away) Miss? (from the opposite side) Miss? (she turns again) Miss!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe is showing off more of her drum skills to Joey by rubbing one of the sticks back and forth across the drum.]
Monica: Okay. Lets hurryOh wait! Do we have a condom? (He looks at her.) Oh right! (Laughs and they resume making out when a nurse catches them in the act.)
Ross: (gasps) Hi... There she is. Hi Emma. Oh my God, I missed you. (kisses her) Oh Emma, I missed you so much. Hey... Did you have a good time with grandma Green? Huh? Did she give you a bottle of anti-depressants again to use as a rattle? (to Rachel)
Rachel: No I wasnt! You were supposed to tell her to come and I was supposed to bring the cake!
[Scene: The Hospital. Erica is moaning and about to give birth. Monica, Chandler, a nurse and a doctor are there with her.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is sitting on couch and Rachel is getting some coffee. Phoebe keeps turning her head from to keep from looking at Rachel.]
Ross: I am not in love with her. She was very upset about having to move out so I eh, didnt tell her we were still married because she would only get more upset. I-I just comforted her, as a friend.
Ross: Congratu!! (sees her hug Mark) -lations-lations.
Rachel: Ross, see! I told you, those swings are evil! Alright, that is it. That is the last time Emma is getting on one of those things for her entire life.
Monica: Then you two can, can sneak into the cockpit, and things will start to heat up, and then a stewardess comes in (Ross looks at her.) Ive been watching too much porn.
Rachel: Oh my goodness, she had the smoothest skin! I mean when I stuck that dollar bill in her g-string and grazed her thigh