words in movies
Monica: No, no, I don't.
Ross: Yeah. I mean, it's been kinda quiet since Carol left, so...
Ross: Nah, I dunno... I think you reach a certain age, having a roommate is kinda pathe- (Realises) ....sorry, that's, that's 'pathet', which is Sanskrit for 'really cool way to live'.
Phoebe: So you guys, I'm doing all new material tonight. I have twelve new songs about my mother's suicide, and one about a snowman.
Joey: Ahhhhhh, I didn't get the job.
Joey: I dunno. Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager. He's not even jolly, it's all political.
Chandler: It's just that I'm sick of being a victim of this Dick Clark holiday. I say this year, no dates, we make a pact. Just the six of us- dinner.
Chandler: Y'know, I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm.
Phoebe: (Takes mike) Thanks, hi. Um, I wanna start with a song that means a lot to me this time of year. (Shakes bell as an introduction) (Sung:)
I made a man with eyes of coal And a smile so bewitchin', How was I supposed to know That my mom was dead in the kitchen? (shakes bell) La lalala la la la la lalala la la...
...I feel a little sneezy And now I- (abruptly stops)
Phoebe: Well, c'mon, if it's important enough to discuss while I'm playing, then I assume it's important enough for everyone else to hear!
David: Noth- I was- I was just saying to my-
David: (Stands up and speaks more loudly) Sorry, I wa- I was just saying to my friend that I thought you were the most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen in my- in my life. And then he said that- you said you thought
David: Daryl Hannah was the most beautiful woman that he'd ever seen in his life and I said yeah, I liked her in Splash, a lot, but not so much in- in Wall Street, I thought she had kind of a
Rachel: Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet. I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo, I mean he had already named both my breasts! ...Ooh. Did I just share too much?
Monica: I think it's romantic.
Phoebe: Well, he's kinda like the guy I went to see that with. Except, except he-he's smarter, and gentler, and sweeter... I just- I just wanna be with him all the time. Day and night, and night and day... and special occasions...
Chandler: Wait a minute, wait a minute, I see where this is going, you're gonna ask him to New Year's, aren't you. You're gonna break the pact. She's gonna break the pact.
Phoebe: No, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, could I just?
Chandler: Yeah, 'cause I already asked Janice.
Chandler: I snapped, okay? I couldn't handle the pressure and I snapped.
Chandler: I'm not saying it was a good idea, I'm saying I snapped!
Ross: I didn't wanna leave him alone. Alright? We- we had our first fight this morning. I think it has to do with my working late. I said some things that I didn't mean, and he- he threw some faeces...
Chandler: Y'know, if you're gonna work late, I could look in on him for you.
Phoebe: Okay, alright, I have a question, then.
David: Uh, that's definitely a, uh, valid question. And, uh, the answer would be (Writes YES on the board) yes. Yes I was. But, see, I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss that happened at this phenomenal moment, because, well, 'cause it's you.
David: Right. But, see, the longer I waited, the more phenomenal the kiss had to be, and now we've reached a place where it's just gotta be one of those things where I just like... sweep everything off the table and throw you down on it. And, uh, I'm not really a, uh, sweeping sorta fella.
Phoebe: Oh, David, I, I think you are a sweeping sorta fella. I mean, you're a sweeper! ...trapped inside a physicist's body.
Phoebe: I can hop. (She hops onto the table)
Monica: I'm sorry, okay. It's just that Chandler has somebody, and Phoebe has somebody- I thought I'd ask Fun Bobby.
Chandler: I happen to know a Fun Bob.
Joey: Yeah, and I met this really hot single mom at the store. What's an elf to do?
Ross: Hey, y'know, this is so not what I needed right now.
Chandler: That's so weird, I had such a blast with him the other night.
Chandler: With the balled-up socks? I figured you taught him that.
Phoebe: I know where Minsk is.
Max: Tell her, David. 'I don't wanna go to Minsk and work with Lifson and Yamaguchi and Flench, on nonononononono. I wanna stay here and make out with my girlfriend!!' (Storms out)
David: I don't know. I don't know what I'm gonna do. I just- you decide.
Phoebe: Oh, but I can't do that-
David: No, but I can't-
Janice: I love this artichoke thing! Oh, don't tell me what's in it, the diet starts tomorrow! (Laughs her Janice laugh)
Ross: 'That thing'? This is how you greet guests at a party? Let me ask you something, if I showed up here with my new girlfriend, she wouldn't be welcome in your home?
Ross: Thank you. (She walks off) C'mon, Marcel, whaddya say you and I do a little mingling? (Marcel runs off) Alright, I'll, uh... catch up with you later.
Rachel: No. Okay. I was at the airport, getting into a cab, when this woman- this blonde planet with a pocketbook- starts yelling at me. Something about how it was her cab first. And then the next thing I know she just starts- starts pulling me out by my hair! So I'm blowing my attack whistle thingy and three more cabs show up, and as I'm going to get into a cab she tackles me. And I hit my head on the kerb and cut my lip on my whistle...oh...everybody having fun at the party? (To Monica) Are people eating my dip?
Sandy: Y'know, when I saw you at the store last week, it was probably the first time I ever mentally undressed an elf.
Fun Bobby: Hey, sorry I'm late. But my, uh, grandfather, he- died about two hours ago. But I-I-I couldn't get a flight out 'til tomorrow, so here I am!
Fun Bobby: It's gonna be an open casket, y'know, so at least I'll- I get to see him again.
Chandler: Alright, Janice, that's it! Janice... Janice... Hey, Janice, when I invited you to this party I didn't necessarily think that it meant that we-
David: Yes I can. Because if I go it means I have to break up with you, and I can't break up with you.
Phoebe: Oh yes, yes, yes you can. Just say, um, 'Phoebe, my work is my life and that's what I have to do right now'. And I say 'your work?! Your work?! How can you say that?!'. And then you say, um, 'it's tearing me apart, but I have no choice. Can't you understand that?'. And I say (Hits him) 'no! No! I can't understand that!'.
Chandler: Ooh. Uh, I don't know how to tell you this, but she's in Monica's bedroom, getting it on with Max, that scientist geek. Ooh, look at that, I did know how to tell you.
Phoebe: Everybody looks so happy. I hate that.
Chandler: Y'know, I uh.. just thought I'd throw this out here. I'm no math whiz, but I do believe there are three girls and three guys right here. (Makes kiss noise)
Phoebe: I dunno. I don't feel like kissing anyone tonight.
Rachel: I can't kiss anyone.
Ross: (Watching Marcel and talking to Rachel) I wanted this to work so much. I mean I'm still in there, changing his diapers, pickin' his fleas... but he's just phoning it in. Just so hard to accept the fact that something you love so much doesn't love you back.
Rachel: ...I think that bitch cracked my tooth.
Joey: Yeah, shes been out there for twenty minutes, Im surprised you didnt hear her on the way over.
Phoebe: Oh yeah it is! Im going to the movies and it starts in like five minutes.
Rachel: Oh, she wants to see me tomorrow...Oh, she sounded really weird, I gotta call Barry... (Does so, on phone) Hi, it's me, I just.. Mindy!! Mindy! Hi! No, I figured that's where you'd be!
Ross: Do you realize I have a classroom full of students?
CHANDLER: It's about cutting my people a little slack, ya know, for morale. Look, if you wanna see some rough numbers, I can get them to you by Wednesday.
Rachel: I think he's stealing from me.
Monica: Of course you can look at it! Yeah, I want your opinion too!
Rachel: No Paul, I dont know anything about you! Yknow, like-like your childhood! Tell me about your childhood!
Phoebe: That is so sweet. But don't you think it's a little too soon? I mean there's so much we don't know about each other.
Joey: All right, Im gonna go! (Gets up and heads for the door.)
Monica: Rachel! Im never gonna think its okay for you to cheat on your husband!
Phoebe: Im sorry, Im with a client right now.
Joey: Yeah I did!
Ross: Can I, can I help you with something?
Ross: (deadpan) Yes I am.
Monica: No. No. Not it. Not it. Not it. (Checks another rack and another woman tries to reach around her.) (To the woman) Dont crowd me! (Finds it) This is it! This is the dress! Oh my God, its perfect! (She takes it off of the rack and someone has a hold of it on the other side of the rack and tugs on it.) Im sorry, this ones taken! (The other woman tugs harder pulling Monica through the rack.) Whoa!
Ross: Okay, I have a problem I have to go into work for a few hours, some kids messed up the Homo Sapien display.
Phoebe: I thought Id try to take a walk. Would you pour me some water? Ill be back soon.
Chandler: Oh yeah, I should probably call them.
Chandler: Oh, I dont think I ever heard that story.
Mrs. Geller: You tell her Jack, I cant do it.
Monica: What about when I started dating Chandler?
Monica: You bet your ass, Im gonna fire you! Thank you.
Rachel: Okay. All right, that's true! But y'know I just don't embarrass that easily.
Jill: Okay, I bought a boat.
Chandler: Well, I have some.
Monica: How? I dont have any money.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, thank you Chandler! I just bought it.
Female Jeweler: I just sold it to that gentleman. (Points to the one walking out the store.)
Rachel: Ah thats great. No actually thats (In a sexy voice) Thats great! Thats really great! Yknow, I gotta tell ya writing, I mean writing, gets me uh, gets me kinda hot.
Rachel: Look, I know that you guys really want to get to Vermont and this isn't a really big deal to you, but it really is to us, ok? Emma will never have a first birthday again.
Rachel: Remember that big thing I was gonna tell you about?
Chandler: Yes, I am!
Joey: Well nothing yet, they really hate you and I want to fit in.
Chandler: No, I realize that honey, but Im not gonna spend all of the money on one party.
Rachel: Well no, I dont smell anything.
Joey: No-no-no, Im serious. You dont smell it? Somethings on fire.
Phoebe: You apologize to the tree right now or I am calling for backup. (The woman calls her bluff.) (Screaming at no one in particular) Backup! Backup!!
Monica: Maybe I do! Im pretty feisty! (She blows the signal.)
Rachel: Yknow, I can not believe you told him, Joey!
Rachel: Uh-huh, yeah I did, because I wore out my first copy when I was with you. (Exits.)
The Fan: Oh yeah! Ive seen all her movies.
Ross: He said he liked that!! Oh youre right, youre right. Im sorry.
Ross: (looking at the table) Excuse me ladies. (To Phoebe) Im sorry?
Chandler: Yeah, Im putting my foot down. Yeah look, when I proposed I told you that I would do anything to make you happy, and if having the perfect wedding makes you happy then, then thats what were gonna do.
Chandler: I love you so much.
Monica: I know this is going to sound unbelievably selfish, but, were you planning on bringing up the whole baby/lesbian thing? Because I think it might take some of the heat off me.
Paul: What?! I cant believe youre trying to stifle me! When just 14 hours ago we figured out that that is exactly what my mother was trying to do to me!
Ronni: Oh, uh, well, you left your good hair at my apartment, I figured you'd need it tomorrow for your meeting. (Hands him the hair)
Joey: Of course Im jokin! I dont take checks.
CAROL: And then Susan and I got in this big fight because I said maybe we should call off the wedding, and she said we weren't doing it for them, we were doing it for us, and if I couldn't see that, then maybe we should call off the wedding. I don't know what to do.
Monica: No, I want everything you just said. I want a marriage.
Joanna: Wait-wait-wait-wait! You can put your sad little muffin back in its drawer. If you must know the truth, I didnt want to lose a perfectly good assistant.
PHOEBE: I can be a waitress. OK watch this. Um, gimme two number ones, 86 the bacon, one Adam and Eve on a raft and rick'em, la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la.
Rachel: (starting to move closer to him) Thats right, I wanna do it with you! Ive been trying to fight it, but you just said all the right things.
Paul: Im thinking that you are looking really fine it that dress.
Joey: I dont want to, Im scared.
Chandler: No I didnt!
ROSS: Would you look at that guy, I mean how long has he been talking to her. It's like, back off buddy she's a waitress not a geisha.
Joey: And, a brownie! (Hands her a bag with the brownie in it.) Well, half a brownie. Actually, its just bag. Its been a long walk from the flower shop and I was startin to feel faint so
Chandler: I got glasses!
Monica: Sweetie, I think the glasses look great. They make you look really sexy.
Monica: Hey, I know I what I want!
Joey: I've been trying for two days. When I called the restaurant, they said she was too busy to talk. I can't believe she's blowin' me off.
Monica: Oh, I already have one.
Frank: You hopped a little bit. Yeah, I really sorry.
Chandler: Our new fridge? I dont live here anymore.
Joey: Why would I do that? It took three guys to get the thing in there!
Ross: What?! That-thats all the way cross town, Im supposed to teach a graduate seminar there in ten minutes.
Chandler: Do you know what I was thinkin?
Chandler: Look Joe, I just, I just don't want to get your hopes up real high.
Chandler: Nothing, I just like to go like this. (Does it again.)
Ross: Hiiii-Ya!! (Chandler lies back down.) Im serious! Youre not walking out on my sister!
Chandler: Oh no problem, maybe Ill play with my left hand.
Chandler: Look, I thought about it too, and Im sorry. I think we should spend all of the money on the wedding.
Rachel: (returning) Wait-wait-wait, I just thought of another story about how nice Ross is!
Ross: Two! Ive been engaged twice!
Chandler: Well, I just thought itd make me feel good to do something nice for my friend.
Ross: And I too am just a love machine. (Hums a little bit and mimics Pauls flexing.)
Rachel: Okay, Im just gonna go over the basic points just one more time, are you ready?
RACHEL: I can not believe I have to walk down the aisle in front of 200 people looking like something you drink when your nauseous.
Phoebe: (writing frantically) You guys, Im sorry, could you please talk a little slower?
Rachel: No. What do you do if I say we are coming about?
Joey: Id say, come again. No-no, wait I-I-I know this one, I know this one, uh
Rachel: No, I just mean that, you know, first impressions don't mean anything. And I-I think you're a really good guy and I'm sorry that I misjudged you.
Joey: Well uh, I wanted to have a few beers, but uh, I got rid of those because Rachel couldnt stand the smell of them. But I have thrown back a lot of orange juice with calcium though. And uh, its a couple weeks past its expiration date, so its got a bit of a kick.
Cassie: (hugs him) Its been so long! Last time I saw you, you were setting up your tent in line to see Return of the Jedi.
Ross: (Using a slightly different inflection for each.) I do. I do. I do.
Chandler: I know.
Chandler: Uh yes, but uh, I just watch it for the articles.
Rachel: No, no-no-no. Phoebe, this was my fault and besides yknow what? Im fine here.
Chandler: Well, I think it all started when you said, "Hey Joey, why dont you be my best man."
Monica: Oh my God Chandler! I cant believe it!
Chandler: (getting up) All right, Im off to see your dad.
Chandler: I dont want him to tell this story for years.
Joey: Look, it's okay, no, no, no, really, look um, I really appreciate this Pheebs, but I think I'm gonna have to go back to Estelle.
Monica: I know!! (calls him) (on phone) Chip? Hi! Its Monica. (listens) Kay. (listens) Kay. (listens) Okay. (listens) Okay, good-bye. (hangs up) Oh my God, we just had the best conversation!! (goes into her room as Rachel enters)
Rachel: It wouldn't have mattered anyway, Phoebe, you and I are, are gonna live together, we're roommates; that's the deal.
Rachel: What? I was just trying to teach you.
Phoebe: Yeah, they thought I was a whore.