words in movies
Rachel: What if, um, if he calls his own cell phone to find out who found it and I answer and we start talking and we fell in love. I mean wouldn't that be a great story? Kind of like a fairy tale for the digital age.
Joey: An-an-anyway I-I just wanted to say that since Im getting your brain when you leave the show, I was wondering if there was any tips you can give me
Cecilia: And if it were true, how dare you come to me ask me for tips about a character that Ive been playing for 20 yearsIll give you a tip! (She throws her drink in his face.)
Phoebe: (handing Rachel the phone) Fine all right, but Id bet youd be singing another tune if we were fighting over a ratchet.
Chandler: If you listen very carefully, I think its Celebration by Cool and the Gang.
Rachel: And remember how I said I was going to keep it in my purse so that if it rang I could just pick it up?
Rachel: No? So youre saying that if I called it, it wouldnt ring?
Joey: Im so sorry. Look, if it was up to me you would never leave the show.
Joey: Uh yeah-ye-ye-ye-ye-yel-l-l-l-l-look the-the-the only reason that I, that I came up to you before was because well, Im really nervous about-about being you. Yknow if you can help me capture the essence of the character. Yknow? Help me keep Jessica alive. Please?
Cecilia: Well, lets just say if I left 15 years ago, the landscape of Mexican cinema would be very different today!
Phoebe: Rachel, listenI mean, if you let me have him then I will really owe you one.
Ross: Look I-I realize if anything were to happen with me and Jill then nothing could ever happen with us!
Ross: Well, ok, it's for 25 thousand dollars. And if I get it, I'll finally be able to complete my field research! And there will be an article about me in the "Paleontology Review"! Yeah! That'll be the first time my name is in there, without people raising serious questions about my work!
Ross: The first time! No seriously, imagine if Carol hadnt realized she was a lesbian.
Monica: (on machine) "Hi, it's Monica. I'm just checking in 'cause I got this message from you and I didn't know if it was old or new or what. So, I'm just checkin'. So let me know, or don't, whatever. I'm breezy."
Rachel: You know what else Im not gonna miss? "Im Monica. I wash the toilet 17 times a day. Even if people are on it!"
Monica: Rachel, if you want the little round waffles, you gotta have to wait until I find the little waffle iron.
Rachel: Okay, yknow, would you feel better if we went someplace else? I mean we could pack all this stuff up and yknow go to your apartment.
Joey: Nah, its okay. Right, Gunther? (Winks at him as if theyre in on a secret together.)
Rachel: Well its only different if he wants it to be. I mean, Im not gonna ask him for anything.
Joey: Ah, just one thing umm, is it all right with you if I, if I scream right up until you say action?
Chandler: Id love it if you would do it.
Phoebe: What if I had taken that job at Merrill Lynch?
Chandler: Oh, hey, when she gets here, is it ok if I introduce you two as "my wife" and "the woman who's carrying my child"? (she's not amused) No? Divorce?
Ross: Hey, if there is ever, anything I can do for you...
Monica: And what if I was still fat? (To Chandler) Well, you wouldnt be dating me, thats for sure.
Ross: Yknow, if, if this is too weird for you, we can still back out at (A knock on the door interrupts him.)
Monica: What if I turn out the lights? (Runs to shut them off.)
Joey: No-hey-no! If you dont want me to do it, I except that. I dont care about that. I just I dont want you to be upset.
Monica: Really? I'm really tired of being your relationship tutor. You're gonna have to figure this one for yourself. All right? Y'know what? If you're too afraid to be in a real relationship, then don't be in one. (She walks out.)
Ross: No one, I’m just saying if... (Phoebe starts pinching him in his neck)
Phoebe: Ooh! Thats good! Wow! But now if you were pregnant, what would you name it? Hint: Phoebe.
Chandler: (picks up the phone) All right, you want to see if the joke stealer will let us watch the show at his place?
Chandler: No, it's a book that's just a book, okay? It's an early edition of the Velveteen Rabbit. It was her favorite book as a kid. So, uh, just... let me know if she likes it, okay?
Richard: No I dont have a ring! (Pause) You go get her Chandler. (Pause) And can I give you a piece of advice? If you do get her, dont let her go. Trust me.
Chandler: Out of my league. I could get a Brian. (Brian enters behind him) If I wanted to get a Brian, I could get a Brian. (Sees him) Hey, Brian.
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Chandler: It's "Ride of the Valkyries" from "Apocalypse Now"... See, here's the thing: The corn rose were really a solution to your frizzy hair problem. And now that we're home, we don't have that problem anymore, so if you think about it... I hate them!
Phoebe: Well I guess its okay to open one more if its part of a set. Yknow, its probably this one. (Grabs another small one.)
Rachel: How do you know that? What if it just gets worse and worse and worse, to the point where we cant even be in the same room with each other?!
Elizabeth: I was wondering if I could talk to you for a moment?
Phoebe: Yeah! What have you got to lose? Yknow you might even end up with someone really special (whispers) if you pick my guy.
Ross: Im just saying if you cant eat by yourself, how do you expect to have a baby by yourself?
Rachel: Well y'know if you, if you started smoking again you could've at least told me! Come on, give me one of those! What are we talking about?
PHOE: Yeah, so I said, "OK, relax please," y'know, I mean, sex can be just about two people right there in the moment, y'know, it's, if he wants to see me again he can call and if not, that's fine too. So after a looooot of talking. . . I convinced him.
Chandler: Okay. What if we lived together and you understand what Im saying?
Joey: So that if we went out on a date, shed be there.
Phoebe: Alright, now I will let go if you both stop.
Monica: And I don't know if you've noticed but she's a (aloud) HOTTY!! (Charlie looks at her) HI!
CHANDLER: Ohhh [turns as if to hug someone] Oh no, wait a minute, I have no one.
Chandler: The only way that I said six would be if the sevens, let meet at seven, not at six.
Joey's Hand Twin: You can't sit here if you're not gonna play.
Ross: Well if it doesnt matter to her, it doesnt matter to me! (to Paul) Still not yelling!
Phoebe: What if we don't find him somebody else? We'll just tell her the date's off, but we don't tell Ross, and he goes to the restaurant and gets stood up!
Monica: Well, if you had kept listening, you-you would have heard me call him Mr. Big (Thinks) ot.
Rachel: I mean if you think about it, I mean Ross did learn something from each marriage.
Phoebe: Oh, if thats what you want you then you really should run his head under hot water and bang his head against a table.
Phoebe: Okay, umm, if a kid gets straight As, his parents would say, "Yeah, he pulled a Monica." Y'know? Or a fireman saves a baby, and they go, "Yeah I know, he pulled a Monica." Or someone hits a homerun and the announcer says, "Yeah, that ones outta here." Though some things dont change.
The Woman: Wow you look so beautiful! If I knew you, Id cry.
Dr. Ledbetter: I wonder if its time for you to rejoin our team at the museum?
Phoebe: Wow! Oh my God, well if theyve ripped off our table ours must be much more than one and fifty dollars!
Ross: Oh perfect, we were just gonna see if you wanted to go.
Ross: Well, if hes angry, he really shouldnt just cover it up. I-I wish he would just tell me the truth.
Monica: I dont know, Ive never had to use the other one. Im just saying yknow, if were having sex, hes not gonna be talking.
Chandler: Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just moved across the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for (struggles to get this out) Monicas allergies. (The duck quacks.) Youre right, I could never lie to you. She hates you. (The phone rings.) Should I get that? (Laughs, then answers the phone.) Hello? (Listens) Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can I take a message? (Listens) Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? (Listens) Okay great. (Listens.) Bye. (Hangs up the phone and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle on the door but Monica walks in and forces him to jump out of the way.)
CHANDLER: I'm gonna hold him a different way. Look I don't understand, if you hated it so much, why did you buy it in the first place?
Chandler: Ah, I dont know, you tell me. Anything you ah, wanna tell me, because, if you ah, you should, if you, you would, tell me.
Monica: Yeah. Anyway, he told me about your apartment. And, um, I couldn't sleep, thinking about it. So, uh, would it be okay if I cleaned it?
Customer: It is beautiful, but Im gonna use this one. Now, if youll excuse me.
Phoebe: If!
Phoebe: If she says no, can I have the ring?
Rachel: Ohh, gosh. You guys, come on, this isI have to meet Joshua! This is my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. Yknow the "Wouldnt it be great if she was my wife" Rachel. Ohh, all right! Are Joey and Chandler back?
Ross: But if I hadn't walked in here, would you..?
Rachel: No, no Phoebe no, I was...no. You know what, I was, I was actually just checking to, see, if I could run. And I can!
Joey: I-I think everybodys pretending they dont hear you. Anyway, look, I dont know about you and your jackets and your separate tables, but Ross is one of my best friends, and if I save him a seat, Im telling you, he will sit in it! (Ross enters and goes over to the white table) Ross! Ross! Over here, man! I-I saved you seat.
Monica: If the school finds out youre fired.
Monica: Look, if you want you can keep it at our place until you find out what to do with it.
Health Inspector: Wow, Monica, if every restaurant is as clean as yours, I'd have a tough time making a living.
Rachel: Well if you go to Disneyland, you dont spend the whole day on the Materhorn.
Joey: They have a kid together, y'know. Theyre like, theyre like a family, and if, I dont know, theres chance they could make that work, I know I wouldnt want to be the guy who stood in the way of that. Are you okay? Do you wanna ah, come poke a nude guy?
Phoebe: Eh, dont be so hard on yourself. If someone I was still in love with was getting married
Rachel: Wh So If neither of you are married by the time youre 40, youre gonna marry Joey.
Rachel: I know you did! I bought the same one! And if she sees your table shes gonna know that I lied to her. I told her ours was an original.
Dr. Baldhara: Well, if he's up against a jungle cat or an animal with horns, you've got to give the little guy something. Otherwise it's just cruel.
Rachel: I know. But if some guy who looks like Corey Haim wants to kiss me tonight, I'm sooo gonna let them! (They spot Chandler)
Ross: Oh! (Does a laugh/groan.) Listen umm, I, I just stopped by to see if you wanted to see this play tonight. Umm, its supposed to be excellent. The director is the same
Phoebe: If you wouldve let me finish, it goes on to say that hes probably not gay.
Phoebe: Yeah! And if you wanna look 19, then you You gotta do something about your eyes.
Phoebe: Really?! Oh thats so exciting! Thank you! Thanks Mon! Oh but Mon, if you touch my guitar again Ill have to pound on you for a little bit.
Chandler: Yeah, that's when if you get the babies out by the end of the month, they give you 2% financing.
Joey: Yeah! If you wanna sing at their wedding, well you sing at their wedding!
Chandler: If marriage worked, Id be all for it. But do you know what the divorce rate in this country is? 97%.
Monica: I just thought it would be nice if I could have just this one night!
Phoebe: Uh, only if you have the hiccups too. Yeah, the pictures are for you, the water and the chocolate is for me. I just didnt feel like getting up. Okay, Im gonna show you a picture of Ross. Okay? And youre going to remember all of the bad things about him. All right? Really focus on his flaws.
CHANDLER: It's about cutting my people a little slack, ya know, for morale. Look, if you wanna see some rough numbers, I can get them to you by Wednesday.
Ross: Look uh, if were gonna do this
Joanna: Wait-wait-wait-wait! You can put your sad little muffin back in its drawer. If you must know the truth, I didnt want to lose a perfectly good assistant.
Monica: What? You freak! You wouldnt even have known about this place if it wasnt for me!
Rachel: All right honey, we'd better go if we wanna catch that movie.
Chandler: If that is your father calling to tell this story then the marriage is off!
Monica: Yes. Well I got his machine and I left a message. But it's okay, it's okay, it's okay, because you know it was like a casual, breezy message. It was breezy! Oh God, what if it wasn't breezy?
Phoebe: If you dont sail your boat, what do you do on it?
Chandler: (To Ross) Why don't you cut him a little slack? Okay? Maybe if he relaxes a little bit, he'll get some work done.
Rachel: No. What do you do if I say we are coming about?
(Phoebe then gets possessed 'cause she starts speaking in tongues. She speaks Italian to Joey's grandmother. She is quickly exorcised and returns to speaking in English. Of course, too most people English is a strange language as well. But none of them are probably reading this and if they were they wouldn't understand it. So why am I talking about them? I have absolutely no clue. Moving on )
Ross: My dad wanted to know if you wanted to play racquetball with us.
Chandler: Yeah okay, I was just talking to the guys. Just look at them I mean, is it okay if they come visit?
Joey: I want this part so much! Yknow? If I dont get this part Im never gonna eat Macaroni and Cheese again!No, I didnt say that! Thats a lie.
[Scene: The Dry Cleaners, Joey and Phoebe are entering to see if his picture is on the wall.]
Mr. Geller: They never did, so if ever see me giving them legal advice just nod along. Shall we?
Ross: So do I. (Slowly walks in.) Okay Rach, before anything happens (He takes off his coat) I just want to lay down a couple of ground rules. (Turns back to face her.) This is just about tonight. I don't to go through with this if it's going to raise the question of "Us." (Rachel's confused) Okay? I just want this to be (Kicks off his left shoe) about what it is! (Kicks off the other one.)