words in movies
Chandler: Hi, my names Chandler. I just moved in next door and I was wondering if you would be interested in battling me in a post-apoplectic world for control of the galaxies last remaining energy source?
Joey: Sure, neighbor come on in.
Chandler: (The room is filled with flowers and a floral print sheet on the bed.) Oh my God. What is th its like a guy never lived in here. Look, youve got to be careful. This girl thing is dangerous. (Looking around the living room.) Its spreading already.
Chandler: (Pointing to the table and picking up the box.) Is that your tiny little box, thats too small to put anything in?
Chandler: No! Ok, this is not good. You are a guy. Ok? This is a guys place. If you let this go, youre going to be sitting around with your fingers soaking in stuff.
Joey: (Grunting) Hmm. (Monica opens the front door and comes in.)
[Scene: Central Perk, The gangs all here. Monica is walking in.]
Ross: The one that always stares at me when I come in?
Monica: No, the one who looked at you once because you got in her way.
Phoebe: Now you will not believe this. But, I was in the copy room, making copies, and Ralph Lauren came in.
Phoebe: Yeah. I was just in there. He introduced himself and the next thing I know, were making out. You know.
Joey: Hey. Uh, can I talk to you for a second? This, uh, kid in this picture. Do you, uh, know this kid? Is that like a relative or something?
Joey: Im sure its a famous watering can, okay. But, come on and what is with the really hot stick in the bathroom?
Joey: Ohh, well, thats ok then. But, okay my towels for instance. I come in to the bathroom here and my towel is not on the floor where keep it. Its up here on some hook..and smells different.
Joey: (Voice cracking) Well thats like summer in a bowl.
Rachel: So you know, I I handed in that marketing report and I never got to hear what you thought.
Rachel: So I hear the Ralph Lauren fooled around with someone in the copy room. (Kim stops the elevator and turns to Rachel.)
[Scene; Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are on the couch. Ross walks in.]
Chandler: Yeah. (Rachel walks in.)
Chandler: Oh, I am no women, but that is one tasty dish. (Phoebe walks in.)
Rachel: That-that is your make out buddy. Dont you recognize him? (Holding up the magazine in front of her face.) Oh wait. Ohh, Phoebe I love you. Kiss me please.
Monica: (Holding a shirt in front of Ross.) Okay, maybe this will make your teeth look less white. (Ross has a big smile.) Nope. Okay, colors that dont work are blue, yellow, green, red, black, white, orange, and purple.
Ross: I dont know what Im going to do. That date starts in like an hour.
Chandler: Yes, but I feel like Ive really gotten in touch with my feminine side enough today. You know. In fact I think were two sachets away from becoming a lesbian couple.
Chandler: Nah, Nah, its okay. I feel like I need to be in guy place. You know, do kind of like a man thing.
Monica: When girls hang out, we dont have pillow fights in our underwear. (Chandler gets a hurt look on his face.) Im sorry. We do. We do. I dont know why I said that.
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, Chandler walks in. Joey and Janine are knitting at the kitchen counter.]
Joey: Hey Chandler. Come on in. Were knitting pot holders.
Rachel: Okay, two things didnt happen. Remember I told you that someone made out with Ralph Lauren in the copy room? Well, it turns out thats not true.
Kim: Yeah, nothing happen. You could cut the sexual tension in here with a knife.
Ross: Hmm-Hmm-Hmm. (Putting his hand up to block his mouth.) Okay. I, uh, am from Long Island. I-I came to the city for college. Um, I, um, have a 5 year old son and in my spare time I like to read spy novels. But, but, lets talk more about you. Hmm.
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, Joey and Monica are arranging flowers. Chandler walks in.]
Joey: So whats really neat. If you sear the stems of the flowers first in a frying pan, your arrangement will look fresh much longer.
[Scene: Elevator at the Ralph Lauren Offices, Rachel gets in . Kim is there.]
Rachel: (Faking crying.) Yeah, he dumped me. He said, "Rachel, I cant do this. Even though you are a very, very, very beautiful women. I cant do this. Im married and Im sorry." And then I dont know why but he said, "and you will never get promoted. Especially not above Kim, who is an integral cog in the Ralph Lauren machine."
Kim: You expect me to believe..(Doors open, Ralph steps in.) Hi Ralph.
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, Joey paces the floor waiting for Janine. She walks in.]
Joey: Im sorry but weve got to get rid of all this girlie stuff in here. I, uh, I got to be a man! Okay. The living room has to remain a guy place, okay? Thats just the way it has to be.
Janine: Well, if thats what you want. Ill just put it all in my room.
Joey: Great Great and thanks for being so understanding. I mean, I didnt want to make a big deal out of this, you know. (She starts to collect all the girlie stuff up.) You could, uh, put the picture of the famous baby in my room. I mean, if you want to.
Janine: Joey? Do you want me to put it all in your room?
Chandler: (Also very excited) That sounds more fun than the thing we were going to do in Vermont!
Joey: (Checks to see if shes drooling on his shirt.) Okay. Okay, okay, hey. (Lays her down and covers her with a blanket.) There we go, lets get your feet up there. (Looks at her) Good night, Kate. Sweet dreams. (Picks up a garbage can) Im gonna put this can right here in case you have to hurl.
(Phoebe arrives, guitar in hand.)
The Guys: Ohhhh! (They all look up in a moment of reflection.)
Rachel: Oh no wait Pheebs, I think for something like that you just ask them to move in with you. But I'm not sure, Chandler?
Chandler: Okay, I will do it. But I have to warn you; this may make me a better person and that is not the man you feel in love with!
Rachel: Wait a minute! She just made a scene in the middle of the ceremony!
Joey: And shes back in the game.
Rachel: Yeah. (Monica walks away) Nice try! (Rachel puts them in a box.)
Monica: Okay listen, yknow when you move in Rachels room is gonna be empty, you wanna talk about what we want to do with it?
(Kathy enters (Because shes listed in the credits).)
Rachel: Yes! Great! Give me those cigs! Give it! Give it! (She grabs their cigarettes and lighters and throws them in the trash.)
Richard: I didnt ask. You wanna come in?
Monica, Ross, and Joey: (joining in) Home is Home Star stew.
Chandler: Uh Joe, when its one oclock in the morning and you dont come by? Thats okay!
Ross: To talk to Rachel, isn't that why we took a ride in the death-cab?
Ross: People are doing it in front of my book!
Paul: Really?! (She nods in the affirmative.)
Phoebe: (coming in from the bathroom) Oh, good, good, you guys are here! Listen, how would like to spend tomorrow taking care of three incredibly cute little puppies?!
(Joey walks out, while Rachel is pensive. Once he's out of her room, he suddenly realizes who she was talking about and goes back in. He looks at her in disbelief and she looks like she was caught red-handed)
Joey: (in a funny voice) Yeah, so it turns out that it wasnt the hair straightener that started the fire. (Rachel prompts him on what to say next.) No-no, it was the candles. Its very not good leaving candles unattended. In fact, one of the first things they teach you in fire school is (Phoebe suddenly enters.) Uhh Uhh Okay. Well, I have to go now. (Phoebe leaves.)
Rachel: Don't let him in! I'm supposed to be at a regatta gala.
Phoebe: Well, freaked. Cause it turns out that the odds are really sucky. And! This is Frank and Alices like only shot. Like, they are literally putting all of their eggs in my basket.
Ross: Okay, you're in bed. She's over on your side, cuddling. Now you wait for her to drift off, and then you hug her (demonstrates on the cushion) and roll her back over to her side of the bed. And then you rollll a-way. Hug for her! Roll for you.
Rachel: (staring at him) Whno, but yknow who did stop in here looking for ya, Tennille.
Monica: Phoebe, you have a, a twig in your hair.
{Transcibers note: In case youre wondering, and I know you are. Their names are all back to normal. Just in a slightly smaller font than usual to allow Courteney Cox Arquette to fit on one line and not be smaller than the rest of their names. Now, on with the show }
Roger: Aaaah, what's wrong, c'mon. (Pats his leg. She lies down and rests her head in his lap)
Joey: Just casually slip it in, yknow lay the groundwork. Tell her uh, Im a lonerNo! An outlaw! Tell her she doesnt want to get mixed up with the likes of me.
Monica: (trying to change subjects, excitedly) So! Dinner in the kitchen around four! Ill see you then. (Pats Chandler on the shoulder and goes into the living room.)
[Cut to the girls in the kitchen.]
Rachel: Is the window open? Because if there�s a window open, a bird could fly in there.
Tag: When Im in a relationship, I love having a girlfriend.
Joey: What the hell is in there?
Chandler: Well, in spite of the yummy bagels and palpable tension, I've got pants that need to be altered.
Monica: Phoebe, why is there a dog in our apartment?
Phoebe: There's no dog in here.
Chandler: Y'know what I think it is? It's the fishnet stockings. Y'know? Whenever I see a girl in fishnet stockings it reminds me of my father in fishnet stockings.
Elizabeth: Ohh, I wouldnt do it in there. Thats my dads bedroom.
Rachel: (on phone) Ross, hi, it's Rachel. I'm just calling to say that um, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat...(cut)...I am over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. (She hangs up and tosses phone in the ice bucket.)
Ross: Um, in Phoebe's room. You can't go in there.
Chandler: Well, I, I should go in there.
Dr. Biely: Primarily in the Pierre Shale region of South Dakota.
Chandler: Yes! I've-I've never seen a roll like this in my life!
(Another professor barges in.)
Monica: Yeah, I got this number from this guy at work and I hired a stripper to come dance for you. Am I going in the wife hall of fame or what?!
Ross: I can't believe you guys are moving in together. That's, that's great! I mean...I'm happy for you guys..
(Joey runs off down the hall. Ross tries Monica and Rachel's apartment, but it is locked so he has to stand in the hall and pretend he wasn't listening. Chandler and his mom come out)
Rachel: Hmm. Do you thinkCould you tell me if shes hanging in, in a one bedroom or a two?
Gary Collins: Welcome back to our fall telethon. Now if you've been enjoying the performance of Cirque Du Soleil, (As he is speaking, Joey and the volunteer getting into a shoving match.) and you'd like to see more of the same kind of programming, it's very simple. All you have to do (Joey is knocked down.) is call in your pledge and at that time tell the operator, one of our volunteers, what kind of programming you'd like to (Just as the volunteer sits down, Joey pulls him to the ground.)
(We see Joey who has puffed up his cheeks and Chandler nonchalantly reaches down and pinches Joeys nose shut. In a few seconds, Joey has to move because hes now forced to actually hold his breath.)
Chandler: Eh, somebodys in a good mood!
Waitress: Hey Monica, theres a customer who wants to complement the chef, should I let him in?
Ross: No! No!! No! Can I speak to someone in charge please?! (The librarian brings his boss over.)
RACH: [coldly] When somebody does not buzz you in, Ross, that means go away. That doesn't mean please climb up the fire escape.
Monica: Umm, listen I am sorry, but Ill put some out first thing in the morning.
Chandler: Oooh, did he put a little starch in your bloomers? (Sits up) Who said that?
Joey: Yeah-yeah I like that but just to go in another direction
Chandler: And I will cook anything you want in here (points to the kitchen), and do anything in there! (Points to the bedroom.)
Mr. Treeger:: You think you could make a mess and the big man in coveralls will come in here and clean it up, huh? Well, why dont think of someone else for a change?
Rachel: Oh yeah! (She gasps.) Oh my God! That is our friend! (Monica covers her face.) It's Naked Ross! (Monica turns and buries her face in Chandler's shoulder.)
Rachel: Well yeah, I wish that you would. (He opens the top drawer.) Well, no its not in there! (Closes it.) How about that drawer? (She points to the bottom one and he opens it. She doesnt see the folder she planted and bends over to check.)
Ross: (Angry) I- I- I ca- I can't believe this. I mean, all I asked you to do was keep him in the apartment.
Joey: It was, yeah. I kind of don't want it to end. Hey, you wanna come in for a drink and a bite of corsage?
Tag: (interrupting) Uh Mr. Zelner, Im the one who filled in that evaluation.
Tag: I know I havent worked in an office before, and I really dont have a lot of experience, but uh
Monica: Come on, was it somebody maybe you dated in college?
Phoebe: Yeah, oh Im sorry, it must be really hard to hear! I tell ya, its a lot easier having three babies play Bringing in the Noise, Bringing in da Funk on your bladder! Im so sick of being pregnant! The only happiness I get is from a cup of coffee, which of course is decaf, causeOh! Im pregnant!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is on the phone, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the kitchen.]
Rachel: (to Monica) Did you know he was in there?
Chandler: Stretchy pants! Why, those are the greatest things in the world! If I were you I would wear them every day, every day!
Chandler: Weirder than watching his two moms make out? (Monica nods in agreement.)
Chandler: Had the money in the wrong hand. (Shows her his left hand with the money in it)
Joey: Wow, thats in like 20 minutes. Youd better get dressed.
Rachel: The logic is, that there are two of us and we are both strong enough to break a chair in half!
Monica: Who? I mean have you seen a car come by here in the last hour and a half? I think we should call Ross, maybe he can get a car and come pick us up.
CHANDLER: Huh? Are, uh, any of these cultures, per chance, in the tri-state area?
Rachel: Joey, yknow that you could just not throw the sticks up in the air.
[Cut to Phoebes room, Phoebe has put her helmet on one of her teddy bears and is playing around with it. Ross knocks and pokes his head in the door.]
Doug: So thanks for the warm welcome. Its good to have you guys on my team, and I come to play. I hope you do too. Now, lets go out there and get em! Huh? And remember, there is no I in team.
Guy: Which bedroom do ya want it in Miss Geller?
Pete: Uh, absolutely, yeah, sEnd her in. (Monica enters) Hi.
Rachel: Its back in cage!
Joey: (yelling from the bedroom) Is it back in the cage?
[Scene: Rosss apartment, Phoebe has moved in and has a massage client on her table shes set up in the living room. Ross enters and is shocked to see a naked man lying on the table.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is in the kitchen, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are sitting around the table writing one notepads while Chandler is looking over their shoulders.]
Rachel: (Comes in the front door and walks towards the kitchen.) Hi.
[Scene: The ticket-counter. Ross and Phoebe have their tickets and start looking at the screens in order to find the gate.]
Monica: Of course not. I mean gosh, Chandler what you did, it's, it's a wonderful thing and I really appreciate it. I know I have this weird thing where I want everything to be in the perfect place, but I'd never expect you to worry about that.
Chandler: Okay, let me just jump in and ask, at what point did you think this was a successful marriage?
Joey: (returning from a deli) Okay, I got it! This place makes the best sandwich in the world!
Joey: There was a seen in Footloose...
Joey: (mocks him, in a whiney voice) look both ways before you cross the street. (Turns and walks headlong into the closed door.)
Rachel: Because I think I just heard her moving around in there.
Rachel: I mean what if this keeps happening? Y'know, they'll-they'll be outside smoking, making all the decisions and I'll just be up in my office breathing my stupid clean air, y'know? And then when the day comes when Kim wants to promote one of us, who do you think she's gonna pick? Me or Smokey Smokerson?
Joey: (Looking around) Uhh do you happen to have a hot girl in there?
Mike: The woman I love... (he walks to Phoebe) I love you... Which is probably something I shouldn't say for the first time in front of my parents... and Tom and Sue...Who are by the way the most sinfully boring I've ever met in my life...
Monica: It's not just the drum noise. Every five minutes, Joey throws his sticks in the air, and I have to hear, "Oh my eye! Oh god, my eye!" I mean, it is so annoying.
Monica: (gets up) Okay, y'know what, Im not fine, Im not. I mean how can I be fine, hearing you come in with her, she wants to see your bedroom.... (pause) Y'know what, what if were friends who dont see other people?
Chandler: He's probably in his room with his current girlfriend Charlie. That's the situation as we know it... (walks to Phoebe and Monica)