words in movies
Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and- not having sex.
Chandler: Finally, I figure I'd better answer it, and it turns out it's my mother, which is very-very weird, because- she never calls me!
Joey: Alright Ross, look. You're feeling a lot of pain right now. You're angry. You're hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is?
Monica: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue... [Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.]
Ross: (in a deep voice) I'll have whatever Christine is having.
(The scene on TV has changed to show two women, one is holding her hair.)
(She is pushed down the stairs and everyone cheers.)
[Time Lapse, Rachel is breating into a paper bag.]
Monica: Okay, look, this is probably for the best, y'know? Independence. Taking control of your life. The whole, 'hat' thing.
Monica: Oh God, is it 6:30? Buzz him in!
Monica: Maybe. Joey: Wait. Your 'not a real date' tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy?
Chandler: Ooh, this is a Dear Diary moment.
Monica: Hi, come in! Paul, this is.. (They are all lined up next to the door.)... everybody, everybody, this is Paul.
[Scene: The Subway, Phoebe is singing for change.]
Phoebe: (singing) Love is sweet as summer showers, love is a wondrous work of art, but your love oh your love, your love...is like a giant pigeon...crapping on my heart. La-la-la-la-la- (some guy gives her some change and to that guy) Thank you. (sings) La-la-la-la...ohhh!
Chandler: I would have to say that is an 'L'-shaped bracket.
(Joey checks that Ross is not looking and dumps it in a plant.)
Monica: That's right. [Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is talking on the phone and pacing.]
Rachel: Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...look, look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel, but it isn't me, it's not me. And not that I have any idea who me is right now, but you just have to give me a chance too... (The maching cuts her off again and she redials.)
[Scene: Ross's Apartment; Ross is pacing while Joey and Chandler are working on some more furniture.]
Chandler: You must stop! (Chandler hits what he is working on with a hammer and it collapses.)
Chandler: Look, Ross, you gotta understand, between us we haven't had a relationship that has lasted longer than a Mento. You, however have had the love of a woman for four years. Four years of closeness and sharing at the end of which she ripped your heart out, and that is why we don't do it! I don't think that was my point!
Ross: You know what the scariest part is? What if there's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman- and that's it? Unfortunately in my case, there was only one woman- for her...
Joey: What are you talking about? 'One woman'? That's like saying there's only one flavor of ice cream for you. Lemme tell you something, Ross. There's lots of flavors out there. There's Rocky Road, and Cookie Dough, and Bing! Cherry Vanilla. You could get 'em with Jimmies, or nuts, or whipped cream! This is the best thing that ever happened to you! You got married, you were, like, what, eight? Welcome back to the world! Grab a spoon!
Monica: Oh, so there is gonna be a fifth date?
Monica: Yeah... yeah, I think there is. -What were you gonna say?
Monica: I know being spit on is probably not what you need right now. Um... how long?
[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is watching Joanne Loves Chaci.]
[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is making coffee for Joey and Chandler.]
Chandler: That is amazing.
Chandler: Hi, Paul, is it?
[Scene: Iridium, Monica is working as Frannie enters.]
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Rachel is there.]
Monica: Is it me? Is it like I have some sort of beacon that only dogs and men with severe emotional problems can hear?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is sitting around the kitchen table. Rachel's credit cards are spread out on the table along with a pair of scissors.]
Rachel: Oh God, come on you guys, is this really necessary? I mean, I can stop charging anytime I want.
Ross: The word you're looking for is 'Anyway'...
Chandler: (as Rachel is cutting up her cards) Y'know, if you listen closely, you can hear a thousand retailers scream.
(Rachel goes into her room and Monica enters the living room as Ross is leaving.)
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there.]
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Monica: This is Rachel. I mean, what are you gonna do, never going to talk to her again? I mean I know its weird, its awkward, but you gotta at least try.
[Scene: The theater. Chandler is sitting in the otherwise empty front row, looking around nervously]
David: Mike is your ex... uh... boyfriend!
PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe.
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe tonight!
Rachel: Oh, please!Honey, just the fact that you want me here to support you, I'm...OH MY GOD!Is that Christian Sanders?He's so gorgeous!
Monica: Do you really think marrying someone else is the right answer?
[Scene: Ross's hotel room. Ross and is reading his keynote speech to Charlie from his laptop]
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica is pouring wine for her boyfriend, Dr. Roger.]
Charlie: Actually the wet season is June to December.
Chandler: Well, it didn't say "This is a virus"!!
Joey: You know what it is? It's a nice place but I gotta see I don't know if I see myself living here. Oh, oh, oh, let me see... (Joey sits down on the couch, mimes opening a can and puts his hand down his pants) Yeah, I could see it.
[The next one is from Episode 512: The One With Chandlers Work Laugh, Joey and Phoebe are betting on who will reach the treat the fastest, the chick or the duck.]
Ross: I don't think that your monologue from Star Wars is gonna help me right now, Joe!
Monica: Ok, Mike, enough is enough, now you love Phoebe and she loves you, so you need to get over your whole "I never want to get married" thing and step up!
Mike: Who is this?
Chandler: Phoebe is going to say "yes"? That's, that's great!
PHOEBE: Chandler, you gotta stop staring at the door. It's like a watched pot, you know if you keep looking at it then the door is to, never gonna boil. I think what you have to do is try not to...
Joey: Kate Miller it is. (he picks up the Kate Miller badge and sticks it on Rachel's breast)
PHOEBE: I don't believe this. Is this how this relationship's gonna work? Ross equals boss. I mean, c'mon what is this, 1922?
Monica: Phoebe is going to say "Yes" to David. See, that's what happens when you meddle in people's lives!
[Scene: Ross's room. Charlie is sitting on the bed, while Ross is walking up and down nervously]
Chandler: Oh, listen. If this is about those prank memos, I had nothing to do with them. Really. Nothing at all. Really. (Chandler tries to hide a rubber chicken from the woman.) Nothing.
Charlie: Oh my God, this is so cool!
Joey: Tell me who it is.
Joey: (eagerly) Yeah, who is that?
Rachel: Oh! (pause) Ok. Ok, you really wanna know who it is?
Charlie: Oh, ah, isn't there another professor that is supposed to come with us?
Monica: The sun is out!
[Scene: Conference room. Ross is making his keynote speech]
Chandler: Ladies? Ross's speech is in 45 minutes.
Chandler: What are you talking about? The couch is perfectly in line with the carpet. And then I can just walk over here and casually just put my feet right up on the...(Tries to rest his feet on the coffee table but they won't reach) OK, OK, here's what we do, we just uh, move the couch closer to the coffee table.
Jay Leno: (on TV) ...Now what is this about you-you being arrested i-in London? What is that all about?
PHOEBE: (calling from the bar on her cell phone.) Hey, Mike, it's me.� Listen, is um, is Ross near you?
[Scene: At the Spa, Phoebe is at the half-opened door]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.]
Charlie: ... is it weird that it's not with each other?
[Scene: The Airport, Chandler and Monica are following the previous couple through a tiny hallway that proves this is a set on a sound stage and not an actual airport, and see them enter the first class lounge.]
Rachel: (worried) What, is everything ok?
[Scene: Rachel's hotel room. She is watching the Weather Channel on TV.]
Chandler: Shes moving on! Okay, if its not this guy, its gonna be somebody else! And unless youre thinking about subletting my peep hole, you are going to have to get used to the fact that the relationship is over! Okay, man? Its over.
Joey: (sitting up again) I'm telling you, Rach, Charlie is not right for me!
Monica: Well I guess there is no harm in telling you now, Rachel and Ross are gonna have a baby.
[Scene: Rachel's hotel room. Joey is standing at the door, facing Rachel]
Rachel: Yeah, he did! (smiling) Oh, see, this is what I'm talking about!
Ross: No!! Y'know-y'know dont do me any favours. In fact, where, wheres the rest of my stuff?! Huh? Like-like my umm, (picks up a book) Hey, this book is mine!! And-and-and, and that T-shirt you sleep in? Id like that back too. Yes, I do.
Joey: Me too. Yeah, this place is great. I'm so happy for you guys. Although, you know, I hope you like fungus.
Susan: Honey, relax. Ross is great with him. (Ross looks at her.) Don't look so surprised. I'm a lovely person.
David: Yeah, well, being a failed scientist doesn't pay quite as well as you might think. That's uhm... one seventieth of a karat. And the clarity is uhm... is quite poor.
Phoebe: Is that Ross?
(Phoebe starts to listen at the other wall, where Rachel's room is. There, Joey and Rachel are kissing.)
Phoebe: Yeah, you're right. This is none of our business.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Chandler is entering to find Joey bingeing on the food from the fridge. Joey isnt doing all that well.]
[Time Lapse: Rachel is returning from chasing down the boy in the cape.]
Charlie: uhm... Is everything okay?
Monica: What?! Are you crazy? You just had Rosss baby! Its-its so inappropriate. No, its worse than that. Its wrong. Its It is bigger than mine! (Rachels engagement ring.)
Ross: You know where Joey is?
Ross: Is everything okay?
Rachel: Yeah, sure... (looks outside into the corridor if Joey is there)
Phoebe: Shhh... This is the listening side of the wall.
Phoebe: Now, what is this?
Joey: Is he gone?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's. Emma is in her bed and Ross and Rachel are rapping and dancing for her.]
Joey's voice, but she sees Ross: Seriously... What is it?
Rachel: Plus, you know, he is with Charlie now.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, continued from earlier, everyone is now in the living room drinking champagne.]
Mr. Oberblau: (seeing her) Oh, you're back... (to Ross) this is my wife, Nancy.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler has a box of keys and is trying them on the secret closet when someone enters.]
Chandler: Well look, it's not easy to spend this much time apart, you know. She's entitled to be a little paranoid... or, in this case: right on money! ... You know, she's amazing, and beautiful, and smart, and if she were here right now, ...she'd kick your ass. Look, you're a really nice person... ham stealing and adultery aside. But, what I have with my wife is pretty great, so nothing is ever gonna happen between us.
Mike: Is it ok if I hug you now?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe and Rachel are in the kitchen as there is a knock on the door. Rachel answers it.]
(Ross walks to the back of the plane, where Rachel is.)
Rachel: Oh really? Well how would you like it if I had sex with you and I taped it? (Joey smiles luridly) Oh forget it! (Ross enters.) Oh there he is now, the father of my child, the porn king of the west village.
Joey: All right. Uhh, okay. Our first contestant is Ross Geller. Why dont you tell us a little something about you Ross?
[Scene: Rachels bedroom, Rachel is entering carrying two glasses of wine. She gives one to Phoebe, keeps one, and completely ignores Monica.]
Rachel: What? What is it?
RICHARD: Monica... [He re-enters the bedroom and Monica jumps on the bed, trying to cover it.] Hey Mon, I have a question. Is Leroy the baddest man in the whole damn town or the fattest man in the whole damn town?
Rachel: Wow! Well, clearly this is not a good time.
Precious: My name is Precious.
[Scene: Mike's place. Phoebe is on the phone.]
Joey: Argh-argh!! (Catches the coat.) Ooh, soft. Is this mink?
Precious: He proposed to you? This is the worst birthday ever. (she starts to cry again)
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's. Only Chandler is in the living room and walks to the bathroom.]
Ross: Come on, come on. Damnit, damnit, damnit, damnit. (to Susan) This is all your fault. This is supposed to be, like, the greatest day of my life, y'know? My son is being born, and I should be in there, you know, instead of stuck in a closet with you.
Chandler: This is what I want to do.
Joey: Okay fine! Im a seven! All right, I have surprisingly small feet. But the rest of me is good, Ill show ya!
Joey: But what you saw, that is the extent of it, okay? One kiss.
Rachel: Ross, this is not how we wanted you to find out about this. You have every right to go nuts.
Phoebe: Ooh, babies! Oh, this one is so cute, get this one!
Monica: Which one is which again?
Rachel: (now looking up at the ceiling) That is hard to say, Ross. That is hard to say.
Monica: Okay, but there is a wire back there! I mean that switch is connected to something!
Ross: What? Fine? Because I am! Aren't you? Aren't you? Aren't you? You see? Who else is fine?
Colleen: The bathroom is down the hall, to your left.
Charlie: Oh, you know what? This is nothing. My father is a raging alcoholic.
Ross: That is gonna hurt tomorrow!
Phoebe: Okay, well, this is crazy. Can't seriously be talking about me taking one of your kids, can we?
Chandler: Well I think it's safe to say that our friendship is effectively ruined.