words in movies
Monica: Do you mind telling us what it is?
Chandler: Well, whatever it is, I hope it involves winking. (Winks in a spy-type manner.)
Monica: What is DOOL?
Joey: Days Of Our Lives. Anyway, youre not gonna believe it! My character is coming out of his coma!!
Joey: Oh well, theyre killing off one of the characters on the show, and when she dies her brain is being transplanted into my body.
Rachel: She is so good at throwing drinks in peoples faces, I mean I dont think Ive ever seen her finish a beverage.
Joey: Yes, but in Drake Remorays body. (Ross laughs unbelievably.) Why is this so hard for you to get? I thought you were a scientist!
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, Joey is watching Jessica Lockhart perform a scene.]
Jessica Lockhart: Oh yes there is!
Cecilia: Yknow what? It doesnt matter! Because it is not true!
Phoebe: Or, we can decide by whose ever name is closer to the word phone.
Rachel: (checking the speed dial) All right, first name on the speed dial is mom.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are eating lunch, when they start to hear a horrible screeching noise. It sounds like someone is skinning a cat.]
Monica: What is that?
Monica: No, there is no way! It can not be Ross! (She looks through the window and sees Ross practicing and fumbling around with the pipes.) Unbelievable! Why is your family Scottish?!
Chandler: Why is your family Ross?!
Monica: He cannot play at our wedding! I mean everyone will leave! I mean come on, that is just noise! Its not even a song!
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment, Phoebe is putting out some Sunflower seeds as Rachel enters.]
Phoebe: That is a different phone.
Rachel: Oh is it?! (She answers the cute guys phone.) Uhh, hello? (On her phone) Yes hi, is Rachel there? (On the other phone) Yes she is, just one moment please. (To Phoebe, holding out both phones.) Its for me!
Phoebe: That is damning evidence.
Rachel: Oh my God! I bet thats him. My digital fairy tale is about to begin. I wonder how I should be? Should I be uh (In a sexy voice) Hello? Or should I be (Happily) Hi! Its Rach (Phoebe knocks the phone out of Rachels hand, catches it, and answers it.) Would you stop doing that?!
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, Dina is at the craft services table getting some food as Joey walks up.]
Cecilia: Joey, well thank you. That is so sweet. Oh, excuse me. (She throws her drink on a passing writer.)
Cecilia: Is that supposed to be me?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are sitting on the couch. Ross is sitting on the armchair.]
Ross: Oh well, it sounds to me like your family is ready to uh, rediscover its Scottish roots.
Monica: No! No-no theyre not. Theyre still very angry! But yknow Chandler is also half-Swedish. You know what the Swedish people are famous for? Sitting down and being quiet.
Ross: Well yeah-yeah the Scottish history is so much more
Chandler: Thats not really important right now. What is important is; while we appreciate the gesture, we just dont feel bagpipes are appropriate for our wedding.
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, Joey is getting pointers on how to play Jessica Lockhart.]
Cecilia: So, the essence of the character is rooted in her confidence. So, when Jessica enters a room for instance, she owns everything and every person in that room. (Joey is nodding.) You try.
Cecilia: Right. Hes not angry at the room either. Try it again, he owns it! He owns the room. It is his. He owns, owns, owns, owns the room! He owns it!! (Joey gets a snooty look on his face.) All right, its a little weird, but its getting better. (Joey is pleased.) Oh well, Im gonna miss this woman so much. I dont know what Im going to do! I mean, its been 20 years of my life.
Joey: Oh wellHey-hey! Maybe, maybe uh, maybe this is a good thing. Yknow? Itll-itll give you a chance to shake things up, play different characters. Youre so talented.
Cecilia: I am. I am, but I dont know you know. An actor of a certain age is not that easy.
Joey: Oh hey come on, dont-dont-dont do this! Umm, look let-let me tell you something, okay? Now when I watch you do a scene, Im thinking, "Boy, she-she is a great actress!" (Shes not buying it.) Uh but-but, I am also thinking, "She is hot!"
Joey: Yeah-yeah, I noticed that! Is that cause shes so passionate?
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment, Phoebe and Rachel are waiting for the cute guy to show up for his cell phone. Rachel is putting on perfume by spraying it ahead of her face, and moving into it. Phoebe tries to steal some.]
(There is a knock on the door.)
Phoebe and Rachel: (simultaneously) Who is it?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Cecilia is entering the living room from Joeys room followed by Joey.]
(Rachel stops dead in her tracks when she sees whom Joey is with.)
Joey: That uh, that is my roommate Rachel.
(Ross resumes playing, this time accompanied by Phoebe screeching out Es in tune with Ross. While Phoebe is singing along, Rachel is having a very difficult time keeping a straight face. Thankfully, Ross gives up after a little while.)
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, a scene is being shot where Dina and Fredrick are celebrating Jessicas horrible accident by drinking champagne.]
Dina: I cant believe shes really gone. Look around you, all of this is ours. (They move into kiss but; theyre stopped by Joey entering with a huge bandage wrapped around his head.)
Joey: Great! Hey! All right! Well-well what is it?!
Cecilia: No thats La Guardia. (Joey nods in recognition.) This is Mexico.
Joey: Well I tell ya, I should probably buy a place in the city first. (Realizes.) And I just got what you meant againThat isI tell ya, that is a tricky one!
Cecilia: That is a tricky one. Well, Joey I really wanna thank you. Youve, well you made a very difficult time for me a little less painful.
Monica: Ill get everybody else (Does so), finally we can start celebrating my(She gasps and is stopped by the sight of Ross and Rachel making out in the hall.) Im sorry, uh apparently Ive opened the door to the past.
Monica: What is wrong with you?!!!
Ross: Oh that is quite all right maam. (Elizabeth exits.)
Ursula: Who is it?
Ross: ALL RIGHT!! Phoebe now come on! Will you please tell me what it is I did that mad you so mad at me!
Ross: I hate Chandler, the bastard ruined my life. (Rachel starts looking around and down, with a 'What the hell is going on?' look on her face.)
(She grabs his arm and drags him over to a table where three beautiful women are sitting. Now, Im going to go out on a limb and say that their names are Stephanie, Karin, and Meg. Okay, so I looked at the credits. Of course, only Meg is named later on, so Ill have to guess who is Stephanie and who is Karin. But, well cross that bridge when we come to it.)
Ross: Mark is that ah, the same Mark that helped you get the job?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is reading a paper as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: Listen Rachel, I feel really bad aboutWhat are you doing? (She sees that Rachel is unpacking.)
Monica: Its so good, that I feel really selfish about being the only one whos eating it, that I think we should have everyone taste how good it is. Especially Ross.
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Jill enters.]
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Rachel enters.]
Joey: (To Ross) What is the matter with you?!
Ross: Well, ok, it's for 25 thousand dollars. And if I get it, I'll finally be able to complete my field research! And there will be an article about me in the "Paleontology Review"! Yeah! That'll be the first time my name is in there, without people raising serious questions about my work!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is sitting at the counter waiting for Gunther, yep Gunthers back, to refill her coffee.]
Monica: Yes, we are. (Chandler is frantically trying to get Monica to correct her.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone but Monica is there playing Monopoly.]
Ross: The point is I... I don't need this right now, OK. It, it's too late, I'm with somebody else, I'm happy. This ship has sailed.
Ross: (making flinging gestures with hands) Oh, tell me, tell me, is everything, uhh....?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is getting Phoebe ready for her date.]
[Scene: The street, Joey is messing with a car cover and still wearing the Porsche stuff. This guy playing street football catches a pass next to the car cover Joey is fooling around with.]
Monica: Ohhh! (Takes the plate.) No! This is my friend Rachel, we went to High School together.
Joey: (turning and whispering to Monica) Shes not crazy is she?
Jill: Yeah. Ooh, I know what this is missing! Alcohol!
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is setting up for the slide show.]
Phoebe: That is.
Rachel: No! There is.. there is noone else!
Jill: Cant have?! Excuse me, the only thing I cant have is dairy! (Starts to storm out.)
Rachel: Joey no, this is wrong! You have to take it back, okay? You dont want to win an award this way. Youre very talented. And someday youre gonna win one of these for real and that one is gonna mean something.
Rachel: Wow! This is so amazing! What else? What else?
The Producer: This is Wayne, the man who created and operates C.H.E.E.S.E.
Ross: Carol our sex life isits just not working
Rachel: Come on! They rushed into this thing so fast its ridiculous! I mean, theyre gonna be engaged for like what? A year? And somewhere along the way, one of them is gonna realise what theyve done and theyre call the whole thing off. Im telling ya, youre gonna be dancing at my wedding before youre dancing at theres.
Phoebe: Yeah well, that's 'cause Monica put me in charge of cups and ice, and Monica is gonna rue the day that she put me in charge of cups and ice.
MONICA: That's Great. You know we don't need to talk about this now. Really, I mean this is, is so way, way, way, in the future, I'm talkin' hovercrafts and apes taking over the planet.
JOEY: [walks out of his room] Hey, this is ridiculous. I'll tell you what. After I get back from my neice's christening, I'll go down to the coffee house with you and we'll all have a nice cup of coffee alright. No problem, Joey's there.
Monica: Phoebe, why is smoke coming out of the bathroom?!
Phoebe: No! Its not a cigarette! The smoke is coming out of me!
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
Phoebe: Oh God! Is that veal?
{Transcribers Note: This is where Part II begins, which means this is now episode 616.}
Rachel: Well, it is, all right? When we were out there today, all I kept thinking was: I can't believe Chandler is screwing this woman, but MAN this would be a nice place to live!
Phoebe: What the hell is this, herbal tea? I hate herbal tea!
Ross: Hey, if there is ever, anything I can do for you...
Rachel: Yeah, it sure is!
Ross: Because! Because, it-it-its Itd be like you having this guitar (Points to hers) and-and never playing it. Okay, this guitar wants to be played! And-and this bike wants to be ridden and-and if you dont ride it you-youre-youre killing its spirit! (Pause) The bike is dying.
Monica: Aunt Syl, stop yelling! All I'm saying is that if you had told me vegetarian lasagna, I would have made vegetarian lasagna. (pauses, listens to person on phone) Well, the meat's only every third layer, maybe you could scrape.
Ross: How hot is this?!
PHOEBE: OK, hi. For your information this is exactly what I wanted. This is a tattoo of the earth as seen from a great distance. It's the way my mother sees me from heaven.
Chandler: Well good, good for you. You really think that Roger is the perfect guy?
Monica: I have no moves. (He moves in to kiss her and she laughs and backs away.) Okay, whatcha doin there?! (Giggles.) Oh yknow what? Im sorry, this is just too weird.
Rachel: (wakes up suddenly and realizes where she is) Oh right.
[Scene: Joey's apartment, the next morning, Rachel is passed out on the couch.]
Ross: No! The reason Im asking is that I sorta had one last night.
[Scene: Phoebes office, she is arriving without the knowledge that shes been fired.]
Monica: Yeah, well, Im using noise. Okay. All right! So, is everybody ready? Here we go. (She flips on the switch and a hum starts.) I hear something! I hear something! Where is it? (They all start looking until Rachel realises its Joey.)
Rachel: Is Joey Tribbiani here?
Rachel: Well, you might want to tell him it sounds like his wife is (whispers) gay.
(Chandler is completely astounded.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is there as Rachel storms in.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Chandler, and Phoebe are there. Joey is working.]
(She takes off the coat she was wearing over her wedding dress, which is violet and has a darker shade petticoat underneath which shows at one side where the dress is lifted up to about the height of her hip and connected to the petticoat. She's wearing a veil over her curly hair and a low cut top with straps only just hanging over her shoulders.)
(Rachel picks up their phone and the ringing stops. As she talks on the phone, an elaborate visual gag is spun out which is too difficult to describe in words.)
Chandler: Hey-hey, is Monica here?
Rachel: Oh b-b-but it is!
Phoebe: What is that?
Phoebe: Chandler, your being here is the best Christmas present I could have ever imagined.
Rachel: Oh no! No! No-no-no-no! No, I mean come on thats-thats crazyI mean thats crazy. So whats-whats going on with you? What is going on with you?
Phoebe: Fine. The reason that I was leaning a little bit more toward Rachel than you is just that youre just kinda high maintenanceOkay lets go to lunch!
David: Are... are you kidding? You know, when you don't see someone for a long time, a-a-and you kind of build them up in your head and you start thinking about: Come on, don't be crazy. Nobody is that beautiful, but... well, you are. (Phoebe seems very charmed) Well, so, uhm... are you seeing... anyone? (Phoebe is still up on a cloud from what David just said)
Ross: Hey Pheebs, maybe this whole heart attack thing is a sign, that-that you should start think about getting a different job.
(They go through the doors into the trauma room, opening them by ramming the gurney through them, only Chandler's foot is hanging off the end and he screams in pain.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel is ranting about Jill to Chandler and Monica.]
Joey: Look, Rach, Rach! I've been with my share of women. In fact, I've been with like a lot of people's share of women. The point is, I've never felt about anyone the way Ross felt about you.
Monica: Well, I did one time, and-and I want to start doing it more. See thats what this is about.
Monica: Oh, what a great gift! Is The Way You Look Tonight on it?!
Rachel: All right Joey! That is enough! (Grabs him and pulls him away from Bobby and Dina) Listen, as beautiful and moving as this ceremony is, its not legal. Okay? They-they dont have a marriage license, they dont have any witnesses, and the groom only has on one shoe!
Monica: Oop, your cake is ready!
DR. BURKE: I didn't need to know that. I guess 21 years is a lot. I mean, hell, I'm a whole person who can drink older than you.
Chandler: Who the hell is Carl?!
Ross: Oh, I know. (Laughs) Yknow, just-just talking about it is getting me kinda
Rachel: Okay! (Picks up the phone and starts dialing.) (In an Irish accent) "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like you to come on board with us full time! (Hangs up.)
Monica: The Way You Look Tonight is on here! Dance with me?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Janice are sitting on the couch, and Phoebe is sitting next to them in the chair.]
Chandler: Yeah, either that, or Gloria Estefan was right, eventually, the rhythm is going to get you.
Ross: Look, this is my home and I want to be able to come and go whenever I want!
Phoebe: Why is Ross doing that?
(Phoebe picks up her cell-phone and calls Monica. Monica is still packing in her apartment.)
Chandler: Oh, is that against the rules?
Ross: No, but it is frowned upon.
Rachel: Okay, wait a minute, wait a minute, why are we so sure that this is a girl?
Monica: Thats okay, this is more important than fruit (pause) (angrily) on my ceiling! You broke up?!
Phoebe: Hey Ross! So listen, about you and the dinosaur girl, are you really just gonna let a couple of Nobel prizes scare you off? What is that, come on, a piece of paper?
(They start to look around seeing that the living room is undamaged.)
Joey: Oh, how bad is it?
[The next clip is from The One Where Ross and Rachel.... You Know.]
Ross: Yknow what? I can easily get out of this, but there is a chance you can get very, very hurt!
Joey: Chandler, is that (Mimes someone using a movie camera and Chandler nods yes.)
Phoebe: But at least the apothecary table is real.