words in movies
Frank: Cause it just sorta happened, yknow we were at the courthouse, we were having lunch
Phoebe: Wow, a year and a half ago I didnt even know I had a brother, and now I have a sister too. (They all hug, and Frank and Alice start kissing.) Okay. Okay. Stop it, dont. So, I gotta get you a gift now. Is there anything you need?
Frank: Yeah, and they-and they say that our-that our only chance to have a baby is that if they take my sperm, her egg and put it together in a dish and then put it into another girl. So we were wondering if you could be the girl that we could put it into.
Joey: (entering with Ross) Hey! You guys! Check it out, check it out! (Hes wearing a blue blazer) Guess which job I got.
Chandler: Blue blazer back. He-he wants it back.
Monica: No, you messed it up. Youre stupid.
Joey: Oh, ah, tour guide at the museum. Yeah, Ross got it for me.
Joey: No, not really. They give you all the information, its uh, its like memorizing a script. (Making like a tour guide) "And on your left, you have Tyrannosaurus Rex, a carnivore from the Jurassic period.
Ross: Uh actually Joey, its the Cretasous period.
Phoebe: And! And, theyre gonna have a baby! (The gang is shocked.) And! And, they want me to grow it for them in my uterus. (The gang is stunned into silence.)
Phoebe: Ewww! And "Oh no!" Itsthey just want me to be the surrogate. Its her-its her egg and her sperm, and Im-Im just the oven, its totally their bun.
Phoebe: Well, they said that I had to think about it first, but what is there to think about? Im gonna be giving them the greatest gift you can possibly give.
Ross: Pheebs, youre talking about putting your body through an awful lot, I mean morning sickness, uhh, labour, and its all for somebody else!
Monica: We just want you to think it through.
Kathy: Umm, (moves her hands down to his butt) I love this touchy. Can I take it to work with me?
Chandler: Oh, yeah, sure, its not mine anyway. It can with the pants.
Monica: In the beginning where yknow its all sex and talking and sex and talking and
Monica: Then what is it?
Monica: So big deal, so Joeys had a lot of girlfriends, it doesnt mean hes great in bed.
Monica: Sweetie, with you its gonna be different. The sex is gonna be great, cause you-you guys are in love.
Ross: Just go for it Chandler.
Chandler: All right, all right, Ill go sleep with my girlfriend. But Im just doing it for you guys.
Joey: Shhh! This is a museum, no talking. Right down here, (Motions to a fossilised dinosaur foot.) we have a large foot. (Sees Ross working in one of the display cases.) Uhh, and over here we have Ross Geller. (Knocks on the glass) Everyone wave Hi to Ross. Ross is one of our most important scientists, look at him, hard at work. (Ross does the old "Putting a cigarette in your ear and pulling it out of your mouth trick.") Okay, moving right along. Come on.
Phoebe Sr: Its open! Come in!
Phoebe Sr: Oh, thats okay, it gave me time to finish glazing my nipples.
Phoebe Sr: Well, yeah, mostly nudes. It combines my two passions, pottery and erotica.
Phoebe Sr: Hey! Okay! Well thanks for coming out to see me. I just-I just thought it would be a very good idea to talk about this baby stuff in person. Yknow
Phoebe Sr: I really dont think its a very good idea, Phoebe.
Phoebe Sr: I realise I dont have any right to start get all parenty on you and everything now, but umm, (Sees that Phoebe isnt paying attention and is busy mimicking the puppy.) uhh Phoebe, would you please look at me and not the puppy, its very important.
Phoebe Sr: I mean, I know what Im talking about. I gave up two babies, and I only wish I had someone there that had given up babies, that could tell me how terrible it is to give up babies. I just think that, it would be something you will regret every single day for the rest of your life. So, how ever hard it is to give up this puppy, it would be like a million times harder to give up a child. (Phoebe is playing with the puppy again, and not listening) I really shouldnt have given you the puppy first.
Tour Guide: Thats just the way it is.
Tour Guide: Maybe its crazy in a perfect world, a world without lab coats and blazers, but you not in a perfect world, you in a museum now. See that scientist in the classes, he and I used to play together all the time in grade school, but now (Turns around) Peter! Hey, Peter! Its me Rhonda! From PS-129! I shared my puddin which you man! I gave you my Snack Pack! (to Joey) See, he pretend he dont even here me!
Joey: I-I think everybodys pretending they dont hear you. Anyway, look, I dont know about you and your jackets and your separate tables, but Ross is one of my best friends, and if I save him a seat, Im telling you, he will sit in it! (Ross enters and goes over to the white table) Ross! Ross! Over here, man! I-I saved you seat.
Joey: Its no big deal. Hey, yknow, you do what you gotta do. Right?
Ross: But hey, its not just me, I mean the scientists and the tour guides never sit together.
Ross: Its like that everywhere, Joey! Okay, Mon, back me up here. Where you work the uh, waiters eat with the waiters, right? And the chefs eat with the other chefs, right?
Joey: Look, Ross, really its-its no big deal. Yknow you wear a white coat, I wear a blue blazer, if that means we cant be friends at work, then so be it. Yknow, hey I understand. Yknow? Hey, when Im in a play and youre in the audience, I dont talk to you, right? So its yknow, its uh, its cool. Ill see you tomorrow. (Leaves)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Phoebe is there with her puppy and is trying to sing it to sleep as Chandler enters.]
Phoebe: Ooh, yknow what, I think its time for puppy to go out again. Come on, lets go to the balcony.
Monica: (to Chandler) So, did you do it?
Monica: Uh-oh, it was bad?
Chandler: It was fine, yknow? But she didnt agree with me as strongly as she agreed with Joey. She was more like, "I see you point, Im all right with it."
Monica: Well, it was the first time. Yknow, theres not always a lot of agreement the first time.
Chandler: Look, you have to help me! Okay? I mean, I know what to do with a woman, yknow, I know where everything goes, its always nice. But I need to know what makes it go from nice to, "My God! Somebodys killing her in there!"
Monica: All right, Im gonna show you something a lot of guys dont know. Rach, give me that pad, please? (She does so and Monica starts drawing on it) All right. Now
Monica: Its kind of an important one!
Chandler: Oh, yknow-yknow what, I was looking at it upside down.
Chandler: Well you might if it were anything like 7!
Ross: Y'know, we work in a museum of natural history, and yet there is something unnatural about the way we eat lunch. Now, I look around this cafeteria, and yknow what I see, I see-I see division. Division, between people in white coats and people in blue blazers, and I ask myself, "My God why?!" Now, I say we shed these-these coats that separate us, and we get to know the people underneath. (He takes off his coat and throws it down.) Im Ross! Im divorced, and I have a kid!
Rachel: Oo, I cant watch this, its like Sophies Choice.
Rachel: Ooh, it was only okay.
Phoebe: No, Im really okay with this. Yknow why? Cause look at them, and I made that, so I know its gonna be like a million times harder to give up a baby but, oh my God, its gonna feel like a million times better, right? I wanna do this. (To Frank and Alice) I wanna carry your baby.
Monica: Its gonna be so great.
Phoebe: Oh, I-I gave them the puppy and it made them so happy that I decided Im gonna carry their baby.
Phoebe Sr: Oh, I-I-I understand all that, but its justthat was my puppy.
Rachel: It depends on who asked.
Chandler: Oh, it wasn't a big deal. I just went to a couple of bookstores, talked to a couple of dealers... called a couple of the author's grandchildren.
Phoebe: Okay. Is it a kind of hot sandwich?
RACHEL: No, I know, they're from me. Look you guys this is not good. I mean we have enough trouble with guys stealing our wind without taking it from each other.
Monica: It's some of Richard's hair! (holds it close to Ross) What do I do with this?
Ross: Put it back exactly where you found it?
Monica: Well, this is the last box of your clothes. Im just gonna label it, "What were you thinking?"
Chandler: Hey Mon, how's it going?
Phoebe: Oh, no-no, this place is totally healthy! Thatthis milk is mine. I bought this today, 'cause I was thirsty for milk, y'know. (She takes a swig of it, but has to turn away from him as she makes a face to show that it has gone bad.) Okay, let's go!
Chandler: Who says you cant get a nice punch bowl for under six bucks? Maybe we can take it back?
Mrs. Bing: Really stupid. And I don't even know how it happened. I'm sorry, honey, I promise it will never happen again. Are we okay now?
Phoebe: It was right after we were living together and you were driving me crazy, okay? You were really controlling and compulsive and shrill.
Ross: They don't like it when you keep asking them if they like you.
Monica: Anyway, I picked up this outfit that I want to wear and the, and the boots dont really go with it.
Mrs. Geller: How could it be so much? The receptions at their house.
Monica: Is it the same thing that Chandler had?
JOEY: Look, it's a nice gesture, it is. But it just feels like--
JOEY: Then I don't know what it is. What's the problem?
Joey: Uh! That's a tough one. Oh! Wait a minute, this happened to me before! Yeah, I was auditioning for a play and the producer fell asleep and... (pause) no wait a minute... it was me who fell asleep... Yeah I mean hey, Shakespeare, how about a chase scene once in a while!?
Joey: (Looking around the room.) It is???
Ross: Emily? Emily! Oh my God! Oh my God, it's Emily! (He picks up a lamp and hands it to Chandler, for no reason.) It's Emily everyone! Shush-shush-shhst! (to Emily) Hi!
(Suddenly, theres movement beside her, startling her. Its Ross! He wakes up and they both start screaming in terror. Then they both grab their heads having aggravated their hangovers.)
Ross: I told you it wasn�t long, but there is an amazing connection between us.
(Its a really good-looking man, Joshua, that Rachel has an instant crush on. Well actually its Tate Donovan, so its not like shes really testing her acting skills.)
Chandler: Would you just please....give me the receipt cause this is great. Its top notch.
Ross: Maybe its a universal thing?
Janine: No, I just thought it was cute.
Joey: (smiling) I'm in it.
Monica: Do you wanna do it at the same time?
Rachel: Okay, okay, okay, look, just don't freak out, but I kinda lost it. I know it's in the apartment, but I definitely lost it.
Janine: Its clean.
Janine: Its dry.
Joey: Yeah, well, it feels different.
Kim: I didnt read it.
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe are there reading. Rachel is sitting on the couch flanked by Ross and Monica. She suddenly stops reading and starts blinking her left eye as if it's bothering her. The problem is that Joey is on her left and thinks she's winking at him and winks back. Ross is watching this and isn't quite sure of what to make of it.]
Joanna: Would you? Or, is it just to sad and desperate, and y'know something that Sophie would do?
Chandler: Its an old key!
Joey: No it isn't! No, it's not. Because you can also explain it with the truth!
Monica: It needs to go about 20 blocks to the left!
Joey: Wow, you are a good friend, 'course the audition was this morning, and I didn't get it. But that was a hell of a kiss. Rachel is a very lucky girl.
Monica: Sex! This is the last day I�m ovulating, and when we don�t do it now, we�ll have to wait till next month. (walks towards bedroom)
Ross: And I'm fine never having heard it... (Rachel looks at Ross in a "why do you say that" manner) Rach, can I... can I see you for a sec?
(They start making out again, and it takes Joey trying to enter to stop them.)
Monica: Phoebe! But I could take one of those little feet and put it in a pita pocket.
Emily: (with her coat on, shes leaving with Ross) Thank you so much for this. It was really so thoughtful of you.
Chandler: Oh God. It's shovely-Joe, isn't it?
Ross: My Thanksgiving leftover sandwich. I can't believe someone ate it!
Phoebe: Ohh, yes it would.
Ross: (stops her) Wait uh, listen. I-I, I have to tell you something. Umm, Ive been thinking, Im just gonna come out and say it. Okay? I-I-I ah, I-I think I love you.
Chloe: (seeing Ross enter) Hey, its the dinosaur guy. (runs over to Ross) Hi, Ross.
Joey: Hey, whats up? (He has solved the problem of eating the steak, hes eating it with his hands.)
(He goes into his room and closes the door. Rachel goes to pick it up and )
Phoebe: Well, I mean, then what happens if it doesn't work out?
Janine: Joey, its Anne Geddes. Shes a famous artist.
Monica: Hey, it was very moving! You're just heartless!
Dr. Green: This where they put it? What, there no table available in the kitchen! Hello, baby.
PHOE: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?
Joey: Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. Someone from work, too. And I could never do that to the guy, because were really good friends.
Monica: Youre not gonna mess it up.
Chandler: No-no-no-no, this is bad! Its bad! This is bad!
Chandler: No! No-no-no-no-no-no. It sounds like they really need you down there.
Monica: Dad [kisses Jack], Mom [kisses Judy]. Look! Look who it is its Chandler!
Phoebe: No, I know, I know, that this is Franks life, (walks behind them, they turn around in the leather chairs to face her) y'know. Y'know, I dont want to be all judgmental, y'know, but this is sick, its sick and wrong!
Young Ethan: Well, think about it. It's always on the news. 'A man is being held up, at gunpoint.' 'Tourists are being terrorised, at gunpoint.' And I just kept thinking: why does people continue to go there? (He checks his watch.) Oh, ah. I should go.
Ross: Ooh! Theres no way to do this without her? Cause I kinda all ready told her uh, it was, it was already taken care of.
Chandler: Don't do anything. Keep it inside. Learn how to hide your feelings! (pause) Don't cry outloud.
Ross: Yeah, yeah, what is it?
Chandler: Oh yeah, it was great. You should be a chef.
Rachel: Okay, I thought it was about your neighbors liking you.
Joey: No. No, I just uh, I just loved the way it feels when everybody thinks I own a Porsche.
Chandler: Yeah, at least you hid your feelings well about it. (Removes a smashed racquet from his bag.)
Rachel: Well, I told him I would think about it, but Im gonna tell him no.
Ross: Yeah, itll be like a funny Thanksgiving story!
Rachel: But can it... just... happen a little bit?
Joey: Did-did it make you wanna walk around in your underwear?
Phoebe: Hi, its Phoebe. Listen someones gonna have to take my 9:00 with Mr. Rehack, cause its like 9:15 now, and Im not there.
Chandler: How could it not matter?!
Chandler: Well, its, its yummy. So Mary-Angela do you like it?
Monica: You! Its not like its a big deal! You-you dont still do it or anything!
(They turn back around to see the baby Monica's carrying, but then they realise what the surprise is. Ross, Mike, Phoebe and Rachel gasp and stare at Chandler and his baby. Joey hasn't figured it out yet.)
Rachel: Well, sure, but they might think its kinda weird considering I dont work there anymore.
Rachel: (sarcastically) No, I did, but tell me again, because its so romantic.
Joey: You got it! Oh-oh! (He starts patting the burned spot, which just happens to be over her breast.)
Ross: Whats a matter with me? Youve got a black light. Its 1999!
Chandler: Pulling flowers out it makes the bag look a lot more masculine.
Joey: Thats what that was?! Cause that other thing? I thought you were on to something, but it did nothing for me.
Chandler: Okay, so thats it, everybody knows! Its official, were moving in together. No turning back. Are ya scared? Are ya?
Rachel: It sure is.
(Tims beeper goes off and he answers it.)
Joey: I like it.
Joey: Yeah, yeah, and the Indians taught the Pilgrims what it meant to be hot in the new world!
Ross: It tastes like feet!
Rachel: Its all gonna be okay. Theyre just so happy that Im not suing them that they gave me one extra month paid maternity leave. So long as I understand that the money should not construed as a down payment on this or any other child I should bear.
Eric: Not really. You youre blurry, but you still look like Ursula. Youre Blursula. Okay wait. Maybe If I-if I just dont look at you for a while. (Stands up and turns his back to her.) See? It it works. Im not, Im not angry at all anymore! This is a great date!
Mrs. Geller: It was you?
Monica: Well what is it? What is it? If its gonna help bring the baby here, like today. I mean, I think you should do it.
Ross: Well I told you it was Chandler who was smoking the pot but it was me. Im sorry.
Ross: Princess Leia, was wearing this, um, gold bikini thing. It was pretty cool.
Chandler: Hey, yknow what we can do? Yknow, now that we are up? We can just like talk to each other all night long, yknow like we did when we were first going out. Itd be fun!
Phoebe: Okay, first of all, breathe. Second of all, I dont get it. Arent you the one that decided that you didnt want to be with Ross?
{Y'know, sometimes I think the script writers throw in a line like that to try to trip me up. But it won't work. I'll always have the last laugh! <manical_laugh.wav> Okay, so maybe I'm a little deluded, it's probably just my spellchecker. But, I must admit I did get Mesozoic and Paleozoic on the first attempt. Yay me! Anyhoo }