words in movies
Phoebe: No, and so there's no one to walk me down the aisle and... well, I would just really love it if you would do it.
Joey: (takes her hand) Listen, I hope... that you know... (has difficulty saying it) I don't want you to see your father cry, GO TO YOUR ROOM!
Phoebe: (her mobile phone rings) Oh, it's my wedding planner. She's driving me crazy! (she answers) Hello... Hey, ok, stop screaming! Ok? So, halibut. All right, so salmon, either way. I don't-I don't... it doesn't matter to me!
Monica: (she enters with a headset on and she's speaking into the microphone) Well, it matters to me!
Monica: Ok. Hold on. (her mobile phone rings) Geller here! No! I said it has to be there by 4 o'clock. Goodbye. (she hangs up) Oh, how hard it is to make an ice sculpture?
Phoebe: Rehearse it!
Phoebe: I'm sorry you guys but, you know, Mike's got his brother and his friends from school so... you know, you were-you were... if it helps you, you were next in line, you just-you just missed the cut.
Monica: (looking at Phoebe eating something) Pheebs, spit that out, that has pork in it.
Monica: Yeah, I changed them. I-I sent you a fax about it!
Ross: And it's a wedding! It'd be weird if I'm not in it...
Mike: Hey guys, how is it going?
Mike: Yeah look, about tomorrow, I... I've got a question for ya. I just found out that one of my groomsmen had had an emergency and can't make it.
Ross: I'll do it!
Mike: You both wanna do it? Uhm... there's only room for one.
Chandler: (almost crying) I wouldn't know, I didn't make it! (they hug)
Rachel: (excited and clapping her hands in front of her face) Goody, what is it!
Ross: I'll do it! (Monica approaches)
Phoebe: Ok. Hello everyone and thank you all for being here tonight. So tomorrow's the big event and some of you might not know, but Mike and I didn't get off to the best start. (she reads a note). My friend Joey and I decided to fix each other up with friends so I, I... (Monica is twirling her hands in order to make Phoebe speed up her speech) oh I... hum... I gave it a lot of thought and I fixed him up with my friend Mary Ellen who couldn't be here tonight because... (Monica is tapping her watch with her finger) it's not important... she is in rehab. Anyway, so, ok, Joey said that he was fixing me up with his friend Mike, only he didn't have a friend Mike so he just brought, uhm, my Mike and, and (Monica clears her throat) but despite, you know... it got... it got good. Ok, I wanna take a moment to mention my mother, who couldn't be here...
Phoebe: And... moment's over! (Rachel, Joey and Chandler all turn and look disapprovingly towards Monica but she just shrugs it off) So, ok, uh, I can forget that. I can forget that and uhm... (she's flipping cards skipping half of them) Oh this is funny! Oh, but you need to know that to... that, to... Oh, ok, well, uhm, I (Monica is miming CUT). Ok, ok, I, ok, I.... MONICA I CAN'T DO IT LIKE THIS! THIS IS MY WEDDING! OKAY, I DON'T WANT THIS (she mimes Monica's when she was twirling her hands) OR THIS (she taps her watch) OR THIS (she mimes CUT) OK? I JUST WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING! WHERE MY FIANCEE CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM ANYTIME HE WANTS! (pause) You know what? You're done.
Rachel: Oh, Ross, c'mon, please! Don't make this harder than it already is!
Ross: I'm not! I'm making it easier! Pick me!
Chandler: Let me tell you why you need to pick me. (Goes to sit on the couch facing backwards to the kitchen. Rachel gets a chair and sits opposite him) See, when I was a kid, I was always left out of everything, you know, and it really made me feel... insecure. You know, I was always picked last in gym. Even behind that big fat exchange student who didn't even know the rules to baseball. I mean, this guy would strike out and then run to third. Anyway, If I'm the only one left out of this wedding, I just know that all those feelings are gonna come rushing back.
Phoebe: No! We're gonna do it my way. (listens) Because your way is stupid! Alright I gotta go, I have another call, Reverend. (switches calls) Hello?
Phoebe: Oh my God, what's it doing here?
Monica: (Obviously enjoying this setback) Ugh, I guess it got sent to the billing address as opposed to the shipping address. (by now she can barely keep herself from smiling) Uh! What a pickle.
Chandler: How's it going?
Ross: Rachel, only one of us can do it, you have to choose. You and me together again. (he winks at her and Rachel looks disgusted)
Mike: Oh, you haven't picked yet. Oh good, 'cause I had an idea. I thought it would be fun if the third groomsman was my family dog. Chappy.
Monica: (enjoying what she's seeing) How's it going?
Rachel: Wow, you know, it's so beautiful out there. You always wanted to get married outside. Why don't you guys just do it on the street?
Phoebe: Me too! (turning to Monica) Monica, do you think we could do it?
Mike: Hey! You made it. Great! Chappy! Hi! (kisses his dad) Hi! (kisses his mom) Mom, I know getting married in the street isn't something you approve of...
Mike's dad: (leans in towards Mike) I crushed a pill and put it in her drink... (to his wife) Come on, sweetheart.
Chandler and Ross: I'll do it!
Monica: Level 1 alert. I repeat, level 1. This is not a drill. Okay we've got a situation. The minister just called. He's snowed in. He can't make it.
Chandler: (quickly) I'll do it.
Monica: Okay, Mike and Joey, get in position. Chandler, come with me. (they walk off, Ross looks down to Chappy, who he's holding and he gets a whiff of the dog's smell. He is clearly disgusted by it.)
Chandler: (to Monica) Is it okay that I want you to wear that head set in bed tonight?
Monica: Okay Marjorie, hit it.
Joey: It was, yeah. I kind of don't want it to end. Hey, you wanna come in for a drink and a bite of corsage?
Rachel: Oh, please tell me its not because Im going with Mark.
[Scene: The park, its dark outside and Monica and Ross are still fighting over the ball.]
JOEY: Hey Phoebs, if you want, I'll do it.
MRS. GELLER: It seems your daughter and Richard are something of an item.
Ross: I know! Anyway, they asked me to be a guest lecturer! I mean its temporary, but uh, if they like me it could lead to a full time job. How great would that look great on a mailbox, huh? "Professor Geller."
Joey: (on TV, finishing installing the Milk Master 2000) Wow, it is easy. (starts to poor the milk) Now, I can have milk everyday.
JOEY: Seriously, you like it? This guy was sellin' them on 8th avenue and I looked at 'em and I though, you know what I don't have?
(They start to kiss, and Ross rushes into the office to break it up.)
MONICA: I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us. I mean, isn't it amazing how much you can touch someone's life, without even knowing it?...Would you look at this dump? He hated us. This is his final revenge!
(We the guys knock on the door upstairs, and the guy answering it.)
(Phoebe takes a bite and spits it out and screams.)
Joey: Hey. I just saw a woman breast feeding both of her twins at the same time; it is like a freak show up here. (Notices shes wiping her eyes.) Whats the matter?
Phoebe: Thankfully you dont need me at all (gets up and to leave) so Okay Super aunt see you later! Rachel lets give it six to eight months (she leaves).
Ross: First of all its Professor Pittain! And second of all, that little bone, proved that, that particular dinosaur had wings, but didnt fly.
MONICA: No I didn't, I said kiwi lime. That's what makes it so special.
Chandler: so then the farmer says, "Thats not a cow and youre not milking it." (Everyone laughs.)
Rachel: (in triumph) I got a touchdown! We did it!!
MONICA: My stock, MEG, it went up 2 points. Hey guys, do you realize that if I had invested my $127 in myself yesterday that I'd like have...a lot more than that today. Ya know what, I'm gonna do it.
Leslie: No, no, I dont want to forget it.
Gunther: They already do. Thats why they call it the tray spot.
Monica: Wow! Its like Rachel in High School.
Ross: Absolutely. (Very Squeaky.) I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, (deep voice) I'm fine. I'm not saying I wasn't a little surprised to see you guys kissing. I mean, at first I was like.. (Screams.) But now that I've had time to absorb it; Lovin' this.
Ross: Oh, I uh, hope you don't mind, I kinda uh, jazzed it up a little. Check this out. (He plays the greeting, and We Will Rock You starts to play and Ross's voice comes over it.) We will, we will, call you back!
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah. Definitely, well it definitely took me by surprise, but Im okay.
Monica: Wow! Its small.
Chandler: Well, thanks. I grow it myself. (Kathy is running her fingers through his hair, and Chandler catches himself enjoying it too much.) Yknow who also has great hair is Joey!
Phoebe: (pointing to the globe) See there it is right there.
Chandler: Youve got it. (he starts to look at his sisters, but he still doesnt know which one is Mary-Angela.)
Monica: If it is a new message, what is he calling to say?
Gary: Hey Joe does it have meatballs on it?
Phoebe: Oh-ooh, and I brought Operation, but umm I lost the umm (It starts buzzing) Its making a noise.
Ross: (loudly so that everyone can hear) Hey lady! I don't care how much you want it! Okay?! I am not gonna to have sex with you in the bathroom! (Rachel sinks lower on her chair trying to hide.)
Chandler: What time is it now?
Joey: I can't believe it, Ross. This sucks!
Rachel: I know! I know, she says its all mass-produced, nothing is authentic, and everyone winds up having the same stuff. (Ross looks at his table.) So come on, shes gonna be here any second! Can we please just cover this up with something?! Please?
Ross: Look, you guys I just wanna say, I really, really appreciate you spending this time with me. Its been a pretty hard time right now, so I just wanna say thanks.
Chandler: It’s perfect. It’s everything we’ve been looking for.
Chandler: This teramisu is, is excellent. Did you make it Mary-Angela?
TRAINER: Hey don't take it personal, he's under a lot of pressure, ya know, starring in a movie and all.
Ross: Look, weve been together. Okay? And then apart, and then together, and then apart, and now we have a baby. (Pause) Its just if-if we got together again and it didnt work out I could never do that to Emma. I mean she-she thinking everything(Starts to cry.) Oh thats now me. What do they put something in the water in this place? Since Rachel and I were doing really, were doing really well right now.
Monica: Would you let it go? It's not that big a deal.
Ross: Okay, its not, its not.
Joey: Itll be great for next weekend. I mean, (in an Irish accent) itll be grrreat.
Ross: No I-I-I would love to be around for you and the baby. And we-we can just try it like on a temporary basis.
Laura: Oh, it's nothing. I went on a date with a guy who lived in this building and it didn't end very well.
Joey: Look, I know I feel asleep before I could shower and now I dont have time! Theyre just ten blocks away, if I run, I can make it.
Ross: No, no, no just do it. Go in there and pick something out so we can go.
Joey: Well, I guess he says that because they were on a break when it happened, that she should of forgiven him by now.
Chandler: Pheebs, can you help me pick out an engagement ring for Monica? I cant figure this out! Its so hard! Should I get her a (turning to each page) Tiffany cut or a Princess cut or aah-ah! Paper cut!
Mark: Oh, hi. Its Mark.
Mark: Its for me.
Ross: Oh, please. Sweetie its hopeless, okay, Im just gonna go. (starts to leave rubbing his neck)
Ross: Hi! Its me.
(The phone rings and Rachel answers it.)
JOEY: Right, I go-, I got it.
Rachel: Well can we see it?! Oh maybe we shouldnt. I mean if she just died this morning out of respect.
RACHEL: It is our first official date. Our first date.
Chandler: Oh I do! Op, no, wait a minute, I took it out of my shirt when I put it on this morning.
Joey: Well, Ive just never seen a guy stare so hard at a piece of paper that didnt have naked chicks on it.
CHANDLER: Yeah, yeah. Some people said some nice things about him. I think somebody should have it.
Phoebe: Its Joey! (Joey turns and looks at her and she mouths I love you to him.)
Ross: Okay, its not, its not.
Chandler: (To Joey) We didnt get to the audition. Im gonna take her to coffee and then well do it then.
DIRECTOR'S ASSISTANT: Is it bad?
Phoebe: Umm, no, it's a purse. And there's a thermos in it.
Ross: Yeah! Got it! (slams down the phone)
Joey: Okay. Well, if that's how you feel about it, fine! None of you get to live with me in my great big hand-shaped mansion! Except uh, you Pheebs. You can live in the thumb.
Rachel: Yeah, but its okay, because when Ross left Mark came over.
ROSS: Oh, oh my God, is this the wrong day? I don't believe it, uh, well, hey, I guess if it works out we'll, we'll have something to tell the grandkids.
Ross: Chloe, Chloe hows it coming?!!
Ross: (quietly) That-that would be incredible. Thank you so much. I-I still can't believe someone ate it!! I mean, look, I left a note and everything.
Monica: Oh, theres banana on it.
Monica: Yes! Have you seen it?
Rachel: I'm not crazy, right? I mean, it was never like that.
Monica: Come on! Come on, I was kidding! It was such an obvious joke!
Phoebe: Im sorry, okay, I-I wasnt looking, and the store says that they wont take it back because you signed for it...
Chandler: Okay, okay-okay, ah, Chloe works with that guy Issac. Issacs sister is Jasmine. And Jasmine works at that message place with Phoebe. And Phoebes friends with Rachel. And thats the trail, I did it!
Phoebe: Was it not pain-free?
MONICA: Oh, gosh, this is so weird. I mean, his whole life was in this apartment, and now it's gone. You know, I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments, for Mr. Heckles. I mean, he was kind of a pain, he was, but, he was a person. You're all going to hell.
Ross: Just you keep it, listen did you, did you tell anyone about us?
Monica: Its okay, its okay.
Joey: Uh, if I may? Umm-umm look, Cliff, you told me a lot of personal stuff about you, right? And maybe-maybe it would if-if would help if-if you knew some personal stuff about her. Uh, she was married to a gay ice dancer. Uh, she gave birth to her brothers triplets. Oh! Oh! Her-her twin sister used to do porn!
Joey: Okay, fine, so now what, I just pull it off?
Phoebe: Aw, honey its not your fault, y'know this is who you are, and I love you, and I want us to be friends, and if I keep living here I dont see that happening.
Ross: No, it was a mistake! I made a mistake! Okay?
Ross: Yeah, uh, except for the red sock, which is still red. I'm sorry, please don't be upset, it could happen to anyone.
Chandler: At least let me smoke it to the good part.
Rachel: What, whats it, whats going on?
Ross: (realizes something) The photo album! There were millions of pictures of the apartment in the photo album. We just go through it and match everything to the pictures.
Erica: Yeah. It's a sonogram they took of the baby last week. I thought you might want to see it. (gives it to Monica, who looks at it for a long time, and then shows it to Chandler)
Rachel: Oo, I cant watch this, its like Sophies Choice.
Carol: Its not that kind of anniversary.
Rachel: Now you're probably going to hire one of the people who did not ah, (She puts her hands on his desk blotter and he moves it. Rachel then doesn't know where to put her hands.) who did, who did not umm, yell at you and storm out, and I think that's a big mistake and here's why. I made a huge fool of myself and I came back, that shows courage. When I thought you wanted sex in exchange for this job, I said no. That shows integrity. And, I was not afraid to stand up for myself and that shows courage. (Suddenly realizes that she said courage twice.) Okay umm, now I know I already said courage, but y'know you gotta have courage. And umm, and finally when I thought you were making sexual advances in the workplace, I said no and I was not litigious. {By the way, litigious means to want to litigate and litigate is to make a lawsuit against. So she didn't want to sue him. Don't worry, I had to look it up too.} So there you go, you got, you got (counts them off with her fingers) courage, you got integrity, you got (Pause) courage again, and not litigious. Look Mr
[Scene: Howard's party, Phoebe is talking Ross up to two more partygoers. Ross isn't happy about it.]
Jason: ...and I know I'll never miss doing it, but I gotta tell you, it's pretty cool knowing that you're making a difference in a kid's life.
Rachel: Ooh, it was only okay.
Rachel: Well it happened about six weeks ago, and uh I had just got home from work and Ross was already there cause I guess he had been hanging out with Joey.
Ross: Oh see, before you uh, when you showed it to me you-you held it that way (he turns her hand upside down) which uh, which was misleading. Well Im (He goes at sits down at his new table and the kids stare at him.) Hello.
Ross: Oh yeah it will! Come on, up! Up-up-up! Up! Yes! Here we go! Pivot! (They start up the stairs again. Chandler is between the couch and the wall now.) Pivot! Piv-ot! Piv-et!! Piv-ett!!! Piv-et!
Joey: What is the big deal? Its not like were exclusive.