words in movies
Joey: Hey, wouldn't be cool if our duck and chick had a little baby? We could call it Chuck.
Chandler: Was it like a sneeze only better?
Joey: (with a disgusted look) What was it?
Chandler: Whoa-heeeiiiiii-iiiii-ah!! (sees it) Huh.
Ross: Well what is it? Is it a mole? (He moves closer to them, and they jump back.)
Ross: Well, eww. What? Is it a pimple?
Chandler: (joining them) Okay, how'd it go at the doctor's?
Joey: Well what is it?!
Ross: He couldn't even tell me! He said it was just some sort of skin... abnormality. And the worst thing is he-he-he said, he said, without being able to identify it, he was reluctant to remove it.
Chandler: Y'know what? You should go to my guy, because when I went in there with my third nipple. He just lopped it right off. Y'know? So I guess I'm lucky. I mean not as lucky as people who were born with two nipples.
Joey: Oh! Maybe they'll name yours after you! Y'know, they'll call it, The Ross. And then people would be like, "Awww, he's got a Ross."
Monica: Well that's it. People never say `We need to talk' unless it's something bad.
Jason: ...and I know I'll never miss doing it, but I gotta tell you, it's pretty cool knowing that you're making a difference in a kid's life.
Ross: Th-th-that's all it is, a third nipple. Y'know? Just your run-of-the-mill third nipple. Y'know? You can take it off. Just slice that baby right off!
Ross: Well then, what is it?!
Dr. Rhodes: Wait a minute, hold it. (He goes to the door and opens it.) Johnson! Will you come in here a moment?
Phoebe: (entering with Rachel) and I-I can't take it! Y'know? I'm just, always afraid one of them is gonna catch me with the other one. It's making me crazy.
Phoebe: Well, it just, it doesn't feel like playing anymore, it feels like work. It's like I'm working in the field.
Monica: Joey, put that down! (the phone rings) Oh my God! It's Pete. Okay, get out!! How the hell do you answer a video-phone! (steps in front of it, and automatically answers it)
Pete: Hey Monica, how's it going.
Monica: Oh its umm, good! It's umm, its good, just here watering the plants.
Monica: Ahh, Pete, the other day when you said you needed to talk, umm, just so I know, is it good news or bad news.
Pete: Oh, it's good news. No, it's definitely good news. Hold on a second, I have another call. (clicks his remote) (to his other call) Hey, how's it going?
Rachel: Mon you definitely have to make it a theme wedding, and the theme could be, Look how much money weve got! Y'know, I mean you could put, you could put money in-in the invitations! You-you could have like little money place settings. And ah, you could start with a money salad! I mean itll be dry, but people will like it.
Monica: Well if-if thats what it is, then its-its crazy.
Phoebe: Yeah, I like Vince a lot, y'know? But, its just Jasons so sensitive, y'know? And in the long run, I think sensitive its just better than having just like a really, really, really nice (pause) butt. (Her eyes glaze over thinking about the butt.) (pause) Jason! Definitely Jason! Okay, wish me luck!
Rachel: OH MY GOD!!! (She holds her hands up in triumph and the gang all look at her.) Sorry, I was just imagining what itd be like to catch the money bouquet.
Vince: No-no its okay. Its just that ah, I thought we had something pretty special here. And y'know I-I felt like you were someone I could finally open up to, and (starts choking up) That theres so much in me I have to share with you yet.
Ross: Thank you, but I want to remove it Pheebs. I dont want to make it savory.
Monica: Y'know when girls sleep with guys with weird things on their body, they tell their friends about it.
Monica: It is so weird, I know what I said, but uh, this morning, I was lying in bed I was, I was imagining what it would be like to say yes. (Rachel slams the magazine shut in amazement.) I know its a little sudden, and its a little rushed, and its totally not like me to do something like this, but that doesnt mean I cant. Right? I mean Im-Im crazy about Pete, and I know that we want the same things, and when I thought about saying yes, it made me really happy.
Phoebe: No, that was my way of telling you. Well, it turns out hes incredibly sensitive, he keeps a journal and he paints. He even showed me charcoal drawings that he drew of me.
Phoebe: Well, yeah, because I have to break up with someone, and Okay so Jason is sensitive, (holds up one finger) but now sos Vince (holds up one finger on her other hand) Plus, Vince has the body y'know? (holds up two more fingers on the Vince side) So Its really just about the math.
(She goes in, and sees Jason without his shirt. It turns out that he has a great body too, and is at a loss for words.)
[Scene: Phoebes Herbal Guys office, Ross is there about his thing. Ross is looking around the exam room, and he goes over to a large bank of drawers, pulls one out and almost spills it as the herbalist, Guru Saj, enters.]
Guru Saj: Well, relax. If it makes you feel better, Ive attended some of the finest medical schools in Central America. Well then, lets take a look at this skin abnormality of yours. (motions to the table) Come on, have a seat. (looks at it) Eeh, huh. As I suspected, its a koondis!
Ross: I guess its worth a try.
Guru Saj: Oh sure, we should see resultsWhoa!! Clearly not the way to go!! (quickly wipes it off)
Guru Saj: We appear to have angered it.
Ross: We?! We angered it?!
Guru Saj: Well its gone.
Guru Saj: It got caught on my watch.
Pete: Its time for me to conquer the physical world.
Pete: I want to become the Ultimate Fighting Champion! Its the most intense physical competition in the world, its banned in 49 states!
Jason: I was passin by and I saw that you were playing tonight, its kinda cool seeing you up there. (kisses her)
Phoebe: Yeah, okay, Ive-Ive been dating both of you, and its been really horrible. Cause y'know its been a lot of fun, for me. Umm, but I-I like you both, and I, and I didnt know how to chose, so... Im sorry, Im just, Im terrible, Im a terrible person. Im terrible.
Vince: Phoebe, Phoebe relax, its okay. I mean we never said this was exclusive.
Joey: Yeah, yeah. Hes got a, hes got a really bad cough, and our vet, he cant do anything about it. Is there something you can do?
Rachel: Oh sure it is!
Chandler: What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-loathing.
Phoebe: (with a fancy dress, still playing and singing): It wasn't just that she was fat, the woman smelled like garbage! Everyone! It wasn't just that she was fat the woman smelled like garbaaaaaage! (to Monica, showing her dress) Classy, uh?
Amanda: Well, it was 1992, and I remember because that was the year I had sex with Evil Knievel (She starts laughing very proudly).
Mindy: (to Rachel) You did it twice?
Rachel: Thank you. (Examines it) Oh, cool! Free sample of coffee!
Monica: He just told me at the counter. He made me promise not to tell, but I couldn't hold it in any longer!
Jamie: It looks like her.
(Knock on door. Ross opens it. Rachel enters.)
Phoebe: Happy thirtieth birthday! Here! (Hands her the hippity-hop.) Its for the child in you, and the woman. Happy thirtieth!
Monica: Oh that's okay. Dont worry about it, you can give it to me when we get back.
Rachel: (Out of shot) Stop it! Marcel! Bad monkey!
Joey: Plus, y'know, I think it should be Joe. Y'know, Joey makes me sound like I'm, I dunno, this big. (Waitress looks at him funny) Which I'm not.
Rachel: Oh, I would love some. But y'know what? Y'know what? Let's not drink it here. I'm feeling kinda crazy. You wanna go to Newark?
CHANDLER: Oh, I thought that's what they used to cover Connecticut when it rained.
Phoebe: Ok, you can do this. It's just like pulling off a Band-aid. Just do it really fast, and then the wound is exposed.
Ross: It gives it a nice antiquey look.
Monica: (looking out the window) Look look! He's doing it again, the guy with the telescope!
Phoebe: Yeah. So, we can do it tomorrow night, you guys. It's Valentine's Day. It's perfect.
Phoebe: Okay. And, my, dead, mother, says, you, are, it. I'm with Rachel.
Helena: Well I wouldnt miss it for the world. Oh! Im getting all misty here! Youd think I was having my legs waxed or something. (Goes back on stage.)
Rachel: Oh it... good! Yeah, but I'm not gonna hear from that for a couple of days.
Rachel: OK... see your two... and I raise you twenty. (throws it in)
Second Message: "Listen, oh... it turns I got the last spot. I'm really sorry man, it was a lot of fun working with you. Give me a call if you want."
(Rachel comes out of the apartment holding a pot. Joey holds in anticipation and Rachel opens it)
Monica: Um, okay, here it goes. I'm not 22. I'm, I'm 25... and thirteen months.
Monica: Alright, you know, we got it, we got it. Let's play for real. High stakes... big bucks...
Ross: So they ah, they all took off, it was pretty hard watching them go, y'know?
Rachel: No, forget it.
Joey: Come on Rach, not again. I got it! Okay? Lets start sailing, and I want to go over there (Points) where that boatload of girls is! (Yelling to them) Yo-ho-ho!
Rachel: No, it was just the three of us.
Rachel: There were times when it wasn't even me.
Joey: So, tell me. Was it like you and Chandler, and then you and me, or you and me and Chandler?
Mona: Yknow, every year I say Im gonna send out holiday cards and I never do it. Do you wanna, do you wanna send this one out together?
Barry: Well, thank you for giving it back.
Chandler: Yes. It's very difficult to appreciate a Thanksgiving dinner once you've seen it in reverse.
Ross: I knew it! I knew it! I always knew she liked him! Y'know, shed say no, but here we are! Right? We just broke up, first thing she does!
Mrs. Tribbiani: Well don't be, because now everything's screwed up. I just want it the way it was.
Monica: (gives her an envelope) Would you just open it?
Monica: It was.
Chandler: To her face? Look its the end of the date, Im standing there, I know all shes waiting for is for me to say Ill call her and its just y'know, comes out. I cant help it, its a compulsion.
ROSS: Yeah, it was, but...I get home, ok, and I see Julie's saline solution on my night table. And I'm thinking to myself, oh my god, what the hell am I doing? I mean, here I am, I am with Julie, this incredible, great woman, who I care about and who cares about me, and I'm like, what, am I just gonna throw all that away?
Ross: Yeah, save it for the cab, okay.
Ross: Save it.
Monica: Yknow, I really have to tell Rachel, but I We just have to get it over with! Yknow, the next time we see them were just gonna tell them. Okay? Thats it.
Rachel: Yeah, well, it's a Mercedes if I move back home. Oh, it was horrible. He called me young lady.
Phoebe: God! Ooh! What is that smell? Its coming from the bathroom. Ooh! (She goes to the bathroom.)
Rachel: What, it's ok when Chandler does it?
Phoebe: Did I miss it, did I miss it?
Carol: Let it go, Ross.
Rachel: Joey, just-just he-hes new in town and I know he doesnt have any guy friends. Just take him to like a ball game or something. Ill really appreciate it.
Rachel: Honey wait, Joey, Im sorry I mean as terrific as I think you are with it (Looks for help.)
Ross: I'll get it.
Ross: I got itI'm getting it!
Matt: Sometimes the dialogue itself is just so funny and youllwell be rehearsing during the week and you justwhatever-whatever the joke is; its so funny we cant get through it in rehearsal and just
Joey: I got it from Monica. She sold it to me for a very reasonable price.
Joey: Oh, it is.
Joey: It is.
Lydia: It isn't.
Phoebe: Oh, no. Don't you hate it when people aren't there for you?
Ross: I got it.
RACH: All right, you know what, that's fine. If you guys want to be children about this, that's fine. I do not need to see it. [Rachel grabs the paper and runs across the room, reading it to herself.]
Ross: No, you started it.
Susan: I got it.
Susan: He started it!
Phoebe: Its interesting that you lost. Now, I forget, do you like to lose?
Frank: I mean, how hard can it be? Y'know, I mean, y'know, babies, y'know who doesnt want babies right? And besides y'know, I never had a Dad around, and ah, now-now I always will, cause y'know, itll be me. Right?
Ross: Except we're not. I mean, we haven't been a couple in like, six years. Oh my god, is that right? Has it been that long?
Monica: This is it. Yeah, this is the one. I cant believe I found it!
Monica: Its beautiful! Its like the first bathroom floor there ever was. (Chandler tries to go to the bathroom) Whoa! Are you going in there for?
Monica: Oh no, it is okay, I mean as long as you know that Chandler and I are also very hot and fiery, just as hot as you! I mean our flame, whew, is on fire!
Susan: Oh, hes fine. Hes fine. Its just that us getting along is difficult for him, because he doesnt like me.
Ross: Ben, you ready? All right, gimme your foot. Ok, on three, Ben. One, two, three. Ok, That's it, Ben.
Joey: Because its all tainted with your betrayal. From now on this apartment is empty for me! And Im not happy about you either. (The bread maker dings) Oh, and just so you know, I made that bread for you. (Joey walks into his bedroom and slams the door.)
Chandler: Hello Phoebe, I've been thinking about you all day. (He's holding the phone so that Monica can hear it as well.)
Ross: No, this is pretty much it.
Chandler: (To Phoebe, behind Monica's back) Still terrified, I'll take care of it. No problem. (When Monica turns back he smiles and kisses her, when she turns away he nods that he'll do it to Phoebe.)
Chandler: Ok, I'm makin' a break for it, I'm goin' out the window.
Monica: I sure do! (She runs over to a drawer, opens it, and grabs a lollipop.) (To Rachel) And you don't get one!
Rachel: Okay, two things didnt happen. Remember I told you that someone made out with Ralph Lauren in the copy room? Well, it turns out thats not true.
(They reach the desk. The bored nurse thinks she's heard it all before.)
Aunt Lillian: No, it really should be burgundy.
Mike: Yeah well, that's the thing. For me it's as far as it can ever go.
Susan: No, I'm getting it. I'll be right back.
(She holds the phone out and starts taunting Phoebe. Phoebe calming knocks the phone out of Rachels hand and catches it.)
Joey: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) What are you talking about? The auditions not til 5:00! (Chandler suddenly remembers and looks at the unfinished message then tries to sneak over and finish it as Joey listens.) Well, nobody told me! (Listens) Whod you talk to? (Listens and turns around to see Chandler trying to finish the message.) Nevermind! (Hangs up.)
Monica: Think about it.
Woman: Hey, hey, hey there aren't any clothes in it.
ROSS: Good morning. Hey pal, look who I brought. It's your old friend Harry Elefante. [Marcel grabs the elephant doll and throws it to the ground]
Rachel: So does it really hurt as bad as they say?
Chandler: (sarcastically) Because its a relaxing and enjoyable time!
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: Thats so sweet. (Takes the flowers.) Would you like to come in and say good-bye? Im sure it would mean a lot to her.
Joey: Well thats true. And I am only naked in one scene. Plus it sounds really great. My characters catholic and he falls in love with this Jewish girl. Who run away together and they get caught in this big rainstorm. So we go into this barn and undress each other and hold each other. Its really sweet and-and tender.
Rachel: I dont care how long ago it was! You told people that I was half and half! Yknow what? I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you in high school.
Joey: Yeah, sure. (He takes it off and starts reading.) Well, you must be new here. Maybe we shouldI'm sorry, can I ask you something? (He stops and asks a question.)
Spokeswoman: ...has become the penicillin of the twenty-first century. And so today, this hospital is about to take major steps toward leading that revolution. It is truly ironic, on one hand consider the size...
Monica: Why isn't it working out?
Joey: Heh, heh. It was nothin'.
Chandler: So how'd it go?
Rachel: Who is it?