words in movies
Ross: No, its Its not that. Umm, now what Im going to say to you, Im not saying as your friend. Okay? Im-Im saying as it as Monicas older brother.
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Phoebe: Oh, yeah! Back then yknow, we called the Great War. It really was!
The Director: (approaching) Okay! Were about an hour away from getting the scene lit. So uh, if you guys dont mind, can we run it a couple of times?
The Director: Okay, all right. Lets do it. (He walks off.) And Action!
Joey: (glances at Richard) No. Nope, I uh I thI thought it might be kind of a cool character thing. Yknow? Hes uh, hes a face toucher. (Behind his back, Richard is nodding no.)
The Director: I dont think so. Lets take it back to Richards last line. (Walks off.) Action!
Monica: I just, I cant believe that we made it!
Monica: Ohh, Im so glad. Thank you so much for staying so calm during this. I mean its really, its made me stay calm. (Chandler just looks at her.) I coulda been worse!
(She exits and as Chandler picks up his coat, the phone rings and the answering machine gets it.)
Mrs. Geller: (shaking her hand) Its lovely to meet you.
Mr. Geller: I didnt even have a chance to act as though Im okay with it!
Rachel: Oh I get it! A man duh!
Monica: All right, Im gonna go steam my wedding dress okay? Who wants the responsibility of making sure nothing happens to it?
Rachel: Ill do it.
Monica: Who wants it? Anybody?
Rachel: I said Ill do it!
Monica: Nobody wants to do it? All right, Ill do it myself.
Rachel: Monica! Im not gonna screw it up!
Ross: (going up to Rachels closed door) Chandler? (He opens the door and looks inside and doesnt see him.) Chandler? (He checks the bathroom and still doesnt find him. He then finds a note on the counter. He picks it up and reads it.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe and Rachel are in the kitchen as there is a knock on the door. Rachel answers it.]
Phoebe: (walking up) Whats up? (Rachel hands her the note and she reads it.) Tell Monica Im sorry. (Pause) Tell her yourself!
Rachel: Yeah but, maybe its not what we think. Maybe its tell Monica Im sorry I drank the last of the milk.
Ross: I think it means he freaked out and left!
Phoebe: Dont be so negative! Good God! Isnt it possible that Sorry is sitting in there (Joey and Rachels apartment) right now?!
Joey: Thanks! Okay-okay check it out! (Reading from the script) Picture? What picture? (He pauses then spits) Eh?
Joey: No! No! I cant! You gotta get me out of it! Ive got plans! (Spits.) Important plans! (Spits on the Ps.)
Phoebe: Shhh! Stop it! Stop it Rachel! You cant do this here! (She drags her into the bathroom.)
Rachel: Im sorry. Im sorry. Its just Its just so sad!
(Phoebe reaches into the trash can, pulls one out, and hands it to Rachel.)
Rachel: Oh thank you! (Wiping her nose.) Oh God! (She throws it out.) Can I have another one?
Phoebe: (looking into the trash can) Sure. (Reaching into the trash can.) Do you need some floss? (Grabs a piece of it.)
Phoebe: There was a pregnancy test in the garbage, and its positive. Monicas pregnant. (Rachel covers her mouth.) So I guess she wont be totally alone.
Phoebe: Just for the future, this is hardly a commercial for it.
Ross: No! I made it seem like I was just calling to chat. Pretty sure, they both think Im interested in them.
Rachel: No Monica! Im serious! Oh, maybe I should just forget about it. Become a lesbian or something.
Rachel: Well maybe it would make me feel better if I slept with Joey.
Joey: Excuse me, Aaron? (The director turns around.) Hi! Umm, I have a little problem with the schedules. Originally, I wasnt supposed to work today, and I have this wedding that I really have to be at. Its my best friends, and Im officiating so I really cant work past four.
The Director: Joey, you gotta stay until the end. We cant stop filming just for you. Its not like its your wedding. (Starts to walk away.)
Joey: Its not on my head.
The Director: Look Joey, theres nothing I can do. Besides, youre probably gonna be out by four anyway. Weve just got one short scene. Its just you and Richard, and God knows hes a pro. Youll be fine. (Walks away and sees Richard entering.) Morning Richard.
Chandler: Its not just their marriage! I mean, look at yours. Look at everybodys! The only person that can make marriage work is Paul Newman! And Ive met me; I am not Paul Newman. I dont race cars! I dont make popcorn! None of my proceeds go to charity.
Chandler: I want to. I love her so much, but Im afr Its too huge.
Ross: Yknow, okay. Youre right. It is huge. So why dont we take it just a little bit at a time? Okay? Umm, forget getting married for a sec; just forget about it. Can you just come home and take a shower?
Monica: (interrupting) The days and nights are hard! I get it! Okay? Look umm, Rachel Im sorry! I have to start getting ready! Im getting married today!
Phoebe: (entering) Found the vest! I mean were gonna have to keep an eye on it, yknow make sure we dont lose it again
The Director: Lets take it from there.
Richard: (To Joey) Are you a little off today? Its going terribly slowly.
Joey: Look, my best friends are getting married in like an hour. Okay? And Im the minister. Please! Please! Can you pull it together?
Richard: Now, that can be arranged! (He brings his sword back and drops it, causing it to fly over the wall.) Slippery little bugger!
(The phone rings and Rachel answers it.)
Ross: There you go. You put on a tuxedo! Now that wasnt so scary, was it?
Rachel: Well Phoebe, we gotta do something! (They turn the corner.) Well, yknow. I mean theres no way Joeys gonna make it in time. So Im gonna through the hotel and see if theres any other weddings going on.
Rachel: Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent! {Its a good thing Jennifer Aniston is Greek, because she had to pronounce those names. Luckily for me, they were written on a sign.}(The happy couple emerges.) Congratulations. (To the best man and maid of honor) Mazel Tov! (The rabbi emerges.) Hi! Oh, great hat. (Hes wearing an interesting hat and she takes him over to talk.) Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. Can you do that?
Mr. Bing: But that was after the wedding, its not bad luck then.
Mrs. Bing: Honey, it isnt good luck.
Joey: So I uh, I just talked to the director. Thats it, were done for the day.
Joey: So I got your car, its right outside.
(And as Joey walks out the door, Richard grabs a bottle of Scotch, just as the door closes and carries it with him.)
Chandler: But come on, look at how cute and small this is! So I got it to give Monica so shed know I was okay.
[Scene: The moment we waited for has finally arrived. Its time for Monica and Chandlers wedding. Weve got violins playing Every Breath You Take, weve got guests seated, and Chandler starts walking down the aisle with his parents on either arm.]
Ross: Ive never walked down the aisle knowing it cant end in divorce.
Joey: (entering) Thats my line! (He walks up the aisle and to the rabbi) I can take it from here, thanks. (To all) Dearly beloved, Im sorry Im a little late. You may be confused by this now, (Hes still in costume) but you wont be Memorial Day weekend 2002. Well, lets get started before the groom takes off again. Huh? (Monica is shocked and looks around.) We are gathered here today, to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. Ive known Monica and Chandler for a long time, and I can not imagine two people more perfect for each other. And now, as Ive left my notes in my dressing room. We shall proceed to the vows. Monica?
Monica: Chandler, for so long I I wondered if I would ever find my prince, my soul mate. Then three years ago, at another wedding I turned to a friend for comfort. And in stead, I found everything that Id ever been looking for my whole life. And now here we are with our future before us and I only want to spend it with you, my prince, my soul mate, my friend. Unless you dont want to. You go!
Chandler: (To Ross) No, thats okay. (Ross nods and retreats.) Monica I thought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever gonna had to do. But when I saw you walking down that aisle I realized how simple it was. I love you. Any surprises that come our way its okay, because I will always love you. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with. You wanna know if Im sure? (He leans in and kisses her.)
(Chandler pushes him through the door and Monica closes it behind them.)
Rachel: All right, look you guys... Look, we appreciate all the advice, but this is between Joey and me and I think we can handle it...
Phoebe: Well, Ill tell you Rachel Karen Green, I had plans with Joey tonight and he left me this note. (Hands it to Rachel.)
Carol: This doesn't have anything to do with the fact that he is being raised by two women, does it?
Ross: (starts to cry) FINE BY ME!! (he opens the door and traps Chandler behind it)
RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry, I guess I just bring it out in him.
Joey: Are you kidding me? Watch! (Makes funny faces trying to cry) Well I cant do it with you guys watching me!
Rachel: I'm hoping that if she hears it enough it will be her first word.
Ross: Well, actually its been great. Shes 20 so shes not looking for anything too serious, which is perfect for me right now.
Monica: Wait-wait!! Okay, stop it! Stop it! Stop! (Breaks it up.) Now listen, no ones gonna fight in this apartment.
Frank: Umm, Alice ah, she ah, called it off.
Joey: Ooh, hey, I know how we can decide! All right, uh, I'm gonna ask you a bunch of questions and then you have to answer real fast. Okay? So uh, clear your mind Clear it right out! Clear it out! Clear!
Monica: I'll take it down to 95% but that's the best I can do.
Dr. Rosen: (Nervously) okay, but you have to admit that every time we go out... Women we meet at the hospital... It turns into...
Monica: I wanted it for years! I was gonna make cookies for my children.
Phoebe: Yeah, I-I cantI mean yknow I was trying to be really y'know okay and upbeat about it, I justI feel so dwarfed by your musical gift. I
Chandler: I know, I, I should have talked to you first about it.
JOEY: Well, I couldn't do it. I told her I didn't want to get the part that way.
Rachel: No its okay, this is whats gonna happen. Im gonna wait a couple years and then the baby will tell him.
Monica: You hand-wrote it?
Rachel: Uh, I think I just did. And uh-oh, here it comes again. Shut up!
Phoebe: Go Charlie! But my point is, ok so she dated them but she also broke up with them. Maybe she's looking to, you know, slum it with some average Joe Phd.
Ross: I know. I know. I mean, one day, he's this little thing, and before you know it, he's this little thing I can't get off my leg.
Phoebe: Umm, my friend, Bonnie. She just always thought Ross was really cute, and now that you two arent together, she asked if I could set it up, but if youre not cool with it...
Monica: Come on Rach, when a guy says hes going to call, it doesnt mean hes going to call. Hasnt it ever happened to you?
Phoebe: Okay, I'll do it, but just these three, right
Ross: Listen, I gotta tell ya, I-Im having a great time! Yknow how before you said it might be weird, the whole student teacher thing, and to be frank I thought it would be too, but its not. I mean its not at all.
Monica: Because we're moving in a couple of days and it just didn't make sense.
Rachel: (sarcastically) Yeah. Look Joey, its enough all right?! You keep making these stupid jokes and this sleazy innuendoes and itsIm notits just not funny anymore!
Mr. Bowmont: What the hell, its for a good cause! All right!
JOEY: Absolutely.� You'd do it for me.� Not that you ever have to because I know how to keep my women satisfied.
Chandler: Look, I thought about it too, and I'm sorry. I think we should spend all of the money on the wedding.
Cecilia: All right Joey, I will help you. Not because I-I owe it to this stupid show, but because I owe it to Jessica.
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, its actually Joey and Rachels. Phoebe is trying to convince Rachel to switch with her and live with Monica as Joey looks on.]
Chandler: Double it! (He does.)
Phoebe: Well, what I really want is for my mom to be alive and enjoy it with me.
Phoebe: Well, how could it not be breezy, no, 'cause, you're, you're in such a breezy place.
Joey: Well, I just tape it to the back of my toilet tank. (realises that anyone could have overheard that) I didn't say that! It's in a bank guarded by robots!
Rachel: Well forget it, Im not telling that girl anything. That is not my responsibility.
Chandler: I can see it now, "Look dad, its the Sphinx!" (Does that party noise again.)
Ross: Yeah, why is it staring at me? I think it knows Im talking about it. (Rachel starts to peek at the file) Dont-dont youWhWhaHey!!
(Ross stares at her. Thinks about it. Puts cards on table, face down.)
Rachel: I did it! Oh! I finished it! I did it all by myself! And there's nobody to hug!
JOEY: I don't need to think about it. I was Dr. Drake Remoray. That was huge. Big things are gonna happen, you'll see. Ross, you still there?
Chandler: Oh, dont worry about it I mean you probably were tired, you had a lot of champagne, it happens to everybody.
Sarah: Fine, I'm sorry, I didn't think it was that big a deal.
Joey: No way! Kay look, if I have to go to the doctor for anything its gonna be for this thing sticking out of my stomach! (Rolls over and shows Chandler.)
Video:April Twelve, Eighteen hundred, Sixty-One (Monica lights Richard's cigar butt), 4:30 A.M. on Tuesday, the United States garrison at Fort Sumter was fired upon (knock on door) it is now under bombardment by....
Joey: (approvingly) Oh! ok, yeah, I think I can do that. Yeah ok, there's this party scene coming up.. and Olivia and her husband are there and all Drake wants to do is grab her and kiss her, but he can't... And that makes me think about all those times when I wanted to grab you and kiss you, but you didn't know so I would just pretend everything was cool, but really, it was killing me.
Chandler: I was giving you some of my best moves, and you missed it. So please wake up so we can do it right!
Joanna: Oh. And Rachel has been really incredible in getting my morning bagel for me. Its amazing how she gets it right almost every time!
(Everyone says no and folds, except for Ross, who thinks about it.)
Rachel: (on tape) (Ross hands her a glass of wine) I cannot believe that I did this. Especially after Monica just went on and on and on about it! (Mimicking Monica) "Okay Rachel! Here are the invitations Rachel! Now be very careful Rachel! Please, drinking no liquids around the invitations Rachel!" (She tilts her wine glass above and moves it back and forth across the invitations) Whoa oh! Oh-oh-oh! Oh oh-oh-oh
Rachel: Mon... Okay... I've gotta... just say what it is I'm gonna say... None of the amazing things that have happened to me in the last ten years, would have happened if it wasn't for you. No-one has been more like a sister to me...
Rachel: Yeah, Im pretty confident about that. Thats what makes it so easy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler! It would be nice to have a little guarantee though.
(There's a knock on the door and Chandler answers it. It's the pizza delivery girl.)
Chandler: Yes, here it comes! Im stuck here all day, and then you come in and spend two seconds with us and then expect to go off gallivanting with your friends? Well I dont think so mister!
Rachel: Phoebe, we cant, we just cant just let it happen! Okay, we have to do something! We have to break them up! Okay? Just go in there and like, shave her head! You owe me one bald girl!!
Rachel: A mistake?! What were you trying to put it in? Her purse?!
Phoebe: Wait okay, if this game is gonna cause problems between the two of you, then maybe I should just keep it.
Ross: Yeah, it's no big deal. I mean, I just met her and I'm fine with it...
MONICA: Are you sure he didn't break it because it really hurts.
Phoebe: W-wI justits thatI haveyknow I have-I have an appointment. And its very important.
Monica: Joey, please dont do that. I think its best that we just forget about it.
Joey: (on the tape) All right back off! I gotta gun! I'm not afraid to use it!
Chandler: What do you mean, like, buy it together?
Chandler: Everybody at my school heard it! You were the hermaphrodite cheerleader from Long Island?!
Ross: Okay, 'you' can't, or (Points to Chandler) you can't? (Chandler grabs his finger) Okay, that's my finger. (Chandler twists it and Ross goes down on one knee) That's, that's my knee. (To Central Perk) Still doing the play. Aaah!
Monica: Isn’t it? Then what about the amazing wainscotting and the crown molding and the dormer windows in the attic?
Monica: Okay, Phoebe, y'know what? That-thats it, thats it, all right? No dinosaurs, no ghosts, no giant dogs, okay? Theyre not the right size, theyre not Victorian, and they just dont go.
Joey: It wasnt my ring! It fell out of Rosss jacket! And when I knelt down to pick it up Rachel thought I was proposing!
Chandler: Actually, no. No, it felt right. You know, it felt like uhm... I can't believe we haven't been doing this the whole time.
Joey: No, Chandler. Look, forget about it, okay? Look, I know things have been a little tight since Janine moved out. Oh, was she hot.
Monica: Well you let me know if you can, because yknow I can bake a pie to cover it.
Tim: Oh, Im so glad you called. I feel like its always me calling you. So, whats up? Is everything okay with Phoebe?
ROSS: Yeah. I don't know, I've been wanting this since like ninth grade typing, ya know. And I just want it to be perfect and right and. . . why isn't that laser beam cutting through the paint?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, 3:02 A.M., Chandler is up. There's a knock on the door and Chandler answers it.]
Phoebe: I cant believe you wont just admit it! (Pause) Okay, just promise me that you wont do anything stupid.
Roy: You know, actually that's not a bad idea. I can do it out of my apartment. I don't think my mom would mind.
Monica: I cant believe this. Do you think that your parents could help pay for it?
Rachel: (on tape) Can you believe this is already happening? I mean it seems like yesterday they just got engaged.
(Chandler runs out the door and closes it behind him. After a short pause the door opens and Chandler comes rushing back through, grabs Monica, kisses her good-bye, and heads back out.)
Monica: Honey, wait. We only did it once. It didn't mean anything to me.
Kathy: Hi! (Kisses Chandler) Thank you so much for coming again. Did you like it tonight?
ROSS: Shouldn't the pizza be here by now?� I mean, they said thirty minutes or less.� Well, how long has it been?
Phoebe: Quite an interesting turn of events, suddenly its my book to the rescue, huh? (Reading her book) Ooh, very interesting. Yeah, well this certainly clears things up.
Chandler: Its gotta be the first one.
Ross: Ok, I gotta say. I mean, it means so much to me that you guys are coming all the way over there to hear me do my speech! UH! And I've a surprise, uh... I had to pull some strings but I was able to get everyone passes to the entire conference! That's right! (he gives them their passes) This babies will get you into all the paleontology lectures and seminars.
Joey: No, no, Emma has one Hugsy, the new Hugsy, huh? The other Hugsy, I don't know, I guess I'll just take it back.
Rachel: No Ross!! (stands up and moves away from him) Dont! You cant just kiss me and think youre gonna make it all go away, okay? It doesnt work that way. It doesnt just make it better. Okay?
Ross: (answering the phone) Hello? (Listens) Hey Mon, hows the packing going? (Listens) Ben? Hes fine. Yeah, hes rightOh my God! (He looks over at the fake Ben and notices that the head has fallen off.) Get your head of your shirt there son! (He tries to push the pumpkin through the neck hole.) What? (Listens) Yeah, its a pumpkin. Ill come pack.
Phoebe: (crossing her fingers and closing her eyes) Please dont be a space ship. Please dont be a space ship. (She turns on the light and looks around and finds that its the smoke detector thats beeping.) Oh thank God! (She moves a chair over and starts to investigate how to make the beeping turn off, in frustration she yanks the thing off of the wall. She sets it down and heads for bed, just as she gets there it beeps again. She opens the cover and removes the battery, but it still beeps.) How could you be beeping?! I just disconnected you! I took out your battery! How can
Ross: (Sighing.) It was...This disagreement over...(She sighs. Ross notices her in her wedding dress.) My god. You...you look beautiful.
Phoebe: No! No! I'm talking you up to people. Just give it a little time, all right? Relax, get something to eat! Okay?
Chandler: I know. You're right. What's it gonna take for you to forgive me?
Phoebe: Oh, look at these! Hey, Ben. Just do it. (Ben starts to cry) Oh my God, oh, ok, was that too much pressure for him?
CHANDLER: So how'd it go?
Phoebe: Just one? I drive you all the way down here, and I don't get to see how it works out?
Monica: (laughs) You are so cute! No. No, it was a fight. You deal with it and move on! It's nothing to freak out about.
The Man: (To Ross) Excuse me. (He puts up a flyer that has a sketch drawing of Joey and it reads, "Warning! Intruder! If you see this creep - call the cops!") You should check this out, tell the other tenants. Apparently he's running around looking for some kind of a hot girl.