words in movies
Joey: (leaving Central Perk and seeing Monica laying on top of Rachel who is moaning in pain.) Oh my.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is watching Quincy M.E. as Chandler is walking into the living room from his bedroom.]
Joey: Hey. Y'know with that goatee you kinda look like Satan.
Chandler: Oh, so thats why the priest threw holy water on me. (theres no reaction from Joey) Okay, listen, you have to cheer up! Okay? You should come out with Ross and me, I mean anything is better than sitting around here crying all day about Kate.
Joey: Hey I was crying because, because nobody believed Quincys theory. Okay?
Joey: Saw a girl with that vest.
Anchorwoman: (on TV) While most of us think of chocolate bunnies and baskets as traditional Easter gifts. Some people insist on giving live chicks as presents. (Joey is intrigued by the idea) Unfortunately, the sad fact remains that most of these little guys wont live to see the fourth of July. (Joey starts to call a place to buy a little baby chick) Because of as a result of improper care, they will be dead.
Joey: (on phone) Yeah, hi. You guys got any of those baby chicks? Cause I was watching this ah, commercial on TV and man, those guys are cute!
Joey: (entering carrying a box) Hey!!
Joey: I got you something! Open it! Open it!
Joey: Its cute, huh?
Joey: Oh, well no problem there. (He picks up the chick, hugs it really tight, and talks to it like its a little baby.)
Chandler: Okay, but this is the last time. (singing) With a chick-chick here, and a chick-chick there. Here a chick, there a chick, everywhere a chick-chick-(Joey enters)-chickeeeen.
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Hows she doing?
Joey: Well yeah, dont-dont you think its a she?
Joey: Well, anyway, I got to go change, Im ah, meeting some of the cast for drinks.
Joey: What?
Joey: Hey! Who was up from 2 oclock this morning until 5 oclock this morning trying to get her back to sleep?
Joey: Ohhh, here it comes.
Joey: Hey!! I need to relax! Okay? I was working all day!
Joey: Thats not what I said. Okay, I just meant...
Joey: I dont know, maybe we werent ready to have a chick.
Joey: Do you think well get our three bucks back?
Joey: Well, the brown one brings out your eyes, but your butt looks great in the blue one.
Ross: Really? (Joey gives him a Like I would know look)
Monica: Does it have to do with Joey?
Monica: Okay, so it doesnt involve Ross or Rachel or Chandler or Joey. But, what about Pete?
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: (sees hes watching Baywatch) Ohhh. (sees he still has the chick) Ahh! What are you doing?! I thought you were gonna take her back to the store today.
(Joey wants to know, but Chandler doesnt want to discuss it by the chick, so he and Joey move over to the windows and away from the chick.)
Joey: Okay, good, good, good, cause, good, cause I was kinda having second thoughts too.
Joey: Thats horrible! Well, you did the right thing man.
(He hear a duck start quacking, and see it waddle into the living room from the bathroom. Joey wants to know whats with the duck.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joeys Bathroom: Chandler is watching the duck swim in the bathtub.]
Joey: What cha doing?
Joey: What about the chick?
Joey: Are you sure?
Joey: Sure.
Joey: (stopping him) Wait. Give him a minute.
(Joey picks up and turns on a hair dryer.)
Ross: (To Joey) Sir Limps-A-Lot, I came up with that.
Chandler: Bye-bye little puppet Joey hand?
Joey: Excellent, I'll be there.
Joey: Oh, hey, dont forget your shirt.
Joey: Ahhhhhhhhhh
The A.D: Yeah, we loves em. Ive never seen him with(He gets a whiff of Joey and starts smelling around.)
Joey: Thank you!
Joey: Ma, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but... what the hell are you talking about?! I mean, what about you?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Joey has got a secret peephole!
(He walks over and stands behind Joey.)
Joey: (thinking) I slept with Monica.
Joey: I can't believe you guys are moving.
Joey: No! I am not a pervert! Okay? It's just I just Kinda
Phoebe: We're so stupid! Do you know what's going on in there? They're trying to take Joey!
Joey: But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies!
Joey: (To the pledge volunteers) How ya doin'? Welcome. Good to see ya!
Joey: We figured we could be late because you guys were gonna be on time (he points the foam finger at the girls)
Joey: Uhh, Monica?
Joey: That makes sense!
Joey: What?!! (He turns around and stares at Chandler who's silently pleading with Joey to go along with it.) No I'm not!!
Joey: What are you doing?
Joey: Why are you doing this?
Joey: When theyre hungry enough, theyll come in.
Joey: Dude, stop talking crazy and make us some tea!
Joey: A hamster? What, those things are like 10 bucks.
Joey: But, I love you.
The Presenter: in the category of Favorite Returning Male Character the nominees are: John Wheeler from General Hospital (Applause), Gavin Grant from The Young and the Restless (Applause), Dunkin Harrington from Passions (Applause), and Joey Tribbiani from Days of Our Lives (Applause). And the Soapie goes to (She opens the envelope) Gavin Grant from The Young and the Restless!
Joey: Thank you, but it would take me forever to pay you that money back and I dont want that hanging over my head. Okay? Besides, as soon as my insurance kicks in I can get all the free operations I want! Yeah, Im thinking Ill probably start with that laser eye surgery too.
Joey: All right, all right. (he comes out from their apartment with a huge sandwich in his hand)
Joey: Shes a woman!
[Scene: Estelle's (Joey's Agent) Office, Joey is there.]
Joey: No! Everything's gettin' all messed up, y'know? Emily won't let Ross see Rachel, we're not gonna stop seeing Rachel, hence Ross stops seeing us!
Chandler: Okay. (notices that Joey is wearing some really tight jeans) My word! Those are snug.
Joey: Thanks!
Joey: It's not.
Joey: (disappointed) Oh.
Joey: Done!
Ross: And it can't be Joey.
Joey: Wait a second, I could star in it!
Monica: I guess Joey was right, it does nothing.
Joey: Hey, how do you spell suspicious?
Joey: You're driving me crazy with that!
Joey: Yeah, I think we said good-bye to that when we invented hammer darts.
Joey: No! No! No! No, Im not going to punch Chandler.
Joey: Yeah, that's the uh, game we were playing.
Joey: Hey!
Joey: $200? Are you sure Pheebs? I mean, after what Sesame Street did to ya?
Joey: No ... the leather sticks to my ass. You know, this isn't fair. What makes you think that I'm just gonna sleep with her and then blow her off? Huh? Can't you guys open your minds to the possibility that I actally like her, and might want something real? (pause) Look, the truth is, I haven't felt this way about anyone since Rachel, ok? I didn't think I could ever love again.
Joey: You're right, you're right, I'll get back to work.
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, Chandler is sitting on one of the chairs and the duck is running around him and quacking.]
Ross: (To Chandler) And shame on you! You should know better, Joey needs to work. (To Joey) Now come on!
Joey: Heh... I was bluffing.
Joey: All right, Rach, the big question is, does he like you? All right? Because if he doesn't like you, this is all a moo-point.
Phoebe: Okay but thats why you have to buy it, so it can fulfil its Christmas destiny, otherwise there gonna throw it into the chipper. Tell him, Joey
(Joey quickly tries to hide Hugsy by throwing it over his head.)
Joey: Oh, its this big budget period movie about these three Italian brothers who come to America around the turn of the century. Its really classy! Oh, and the director is supposed to be the next, next Martin Scorcese.
Joey: Oh, y'know the same thing happened to me one time.
Chandler: Well, Joey, I wrote a little song today. It's called: Get Up.
Joey: Yeah, wow, sorry Rach.
Joey: They're brother and sister!!!
Chandler: Yeah, I believe I was talking to Joey, alright there, Mother-Kisser? (Goes to the counter)
(Joey enters and Chandler pushes her away.)
Chandler: Could I be more sorry. (Looks at Joey.)
Joey: (Reading the scene set up.) Okay, it's a typical New York City apartment. Two girls are just hanging out.
Rachel: Oh, y'know Joey, you are sick!
Joey: What's the matter?!
Joey: All right! Here we go! 1999! The year of Joey!
Monica: Oh no, wait! Joey!
Joey: Chandler.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Okay, great!
Joey: Yeah!
Joey: So? Who would you rather have kiss you, me or Chandler?
Joey: Pheebs! Pheebs! Ross wants to kiss you at midnight!
Rachel: (To Joey) Happy New Year, Joey!
Joey: (flipping to the last page) Ew, you get thrown from a horse into an electric fence.
Joey: I know, I know..., but that's okay. I mean, we can control ourselves, we're not animals.
Ross: Fine! No more dinosaur stuff! Can I talk about fossils? (Joey is about to sit down and hears this so instead he groans and exits.)
Joey: Really? Who-who have you taught?
(Both Joey and Chandler and Monica and Rachel jump up and down for joy.)
Joey: Yeah that'd be great! Thanks Pheebs!
Chandler: (waking Joey) Hey, check out that girl! She is really hot!
Chandler and Joey: Hey!
Ross: Okay! (She leaves.) (To Chandler and Joey.) Hey!
Joey: Umm, okay.
Joey: That's great. But uh, I'm not really expecting a lot of calls.
Joey: Dude, if you think Fireball's relaxing, you've obviously have never played.
Joey: (muffled by the mouth guard) Dude! I am trying to sleep! (Shrugs to say, "Whats up with that?")
Joey: Uh yeah, right here. (He punches his fist through the wall next to the door.)
(The wool-bound trio returns to the table. Rachel has to rush ahead to avoid becoming tangled. Joey brings the shopping bag over to Phoebe, and takes out a nice cardigan.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its after Ross and Joeys talk with Frank, and Phoebes is finding out what happened.]
Joey: No.
Joey: Oh thats okay. Hey, actually in a way its kinda nice. Me, bringing the food of my ancestors, you, the food of yours!
Joey: Yes!
Joey: You look like a freak.
Joey: Clear the tracks for the boobie payback express. Next stop: Rachel Green. (He goes into the bathroom. We hear a scream and he comes out, closely followed by Monica in a towel)
Joey: No, no, look. All I’m saying is that you’re my agent, ok? And you’re not getting me into any auditions and I’m tired of it.
Joey: Or.. we could flip a coin, and then multiply the..
Joey: Well, Chandler's old roomate was Jewish, and these are the only candles we have, so... Happy Chanukah, everyone.