words in movies
Joey: Yeah-yeah. And the craziest thing is that I just ate a whole pizza by myself! (Laughs)
(Monica is taking a drink as Ross says that, laughs, and snorts her drink.)
[Everyone laughs]
JOEY: Good, otherwise my watch would fall off. [laughs hysterically]
(She laughs at the childhood memory. Phoebe smiles at being able to make her point.)
Rachel: (laughs) Well, I mean, are you sure you want to go out with her? I mean that aint a pretty picture in the morning, yknow what I mean. That wig all in disarray, and boobs flung over the night stand, y'know.
Mona: Huh, could you imagine. I go away for a few days, and come back, and my boyfriend is living with some woman he got pregnant! (Mona laughs yes again!)
Rachel: (reading what he wrote again) "Dear Rach, youre a great person. Sorry about your tiney-wienie." (Will laughs.)
Richard: Oh, (laughs) that was the blind date that I told you about, she called and switched it to today.
Ross: I like it. I do, I think it's a Ten. (Chandler laughs.)
Ross: Okay. (He leans in to kiss her again, but she leans back preventing him from making contact.) Wow, its-its 5:30 in the morning. (Rachel laughs) So, Id better get cracking on this baby.
Monica: I might've said that. (Chandler laughs.) Why is that funny?
Ross: (on the phone) Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to draw on my friend's face. (Listens) A beard and a moustache. (Listens and laughs) Thank you. (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) No, she didn't think so. (Listens) I know it's like (turns and sees Rachel staring at him and quickly changes the subject) anyway, umm well make-up didn't cover it and we've tried everything to get it off and nothing's worked. What-what do we do? (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Oh! Okay. (Listens) Okay, thank you! (Rachel gets excited at his tone.) (Hangs up the phone) Yeah, it's not coming off.
The Casting Director: Terrific! Well uh, theres one more thing. Uhh, uh its really important to the director that everything in this movie is authentic. Yeah and so in your love scene with Sarah she talks about how shes never seen a naked man who wasnt Jewish. So (Laughs.)
Ross: Its a good thing I didnt do it, because it sounds like it wouldve been a very expensive wedding. (Rachel laughs) Okay, good night
Phoebe: Oh well y'know. (laughs)
Phoebe: Okay, oh and you know, if she gets upset, just scratch her tummy and give her a liver snout. (laughs and hangs up the phone)
Rachel: (laughs) You ah, you didnt say Yes to that did you?
Rachel: (laughs and pushes the chair back in) Yeah, well, y'know umm No honey, listen I think it's a great idea to become friends with someone before you date them, but I think the way you do it is y'know you meet someone, become their friend, build a foundation, then you ask them out on a date. Don't hit on your existing friends!
Monica: Oh. (she laughs)
Chandler: (laughs) No. No!
Chandler: Oh, shes got you running errands, yknow, picking up wedding dresses (Laughs and makes like Indiana Jones and his whip) Wah-pah!
Rachel: Oh! (laughs) Thats fine.
Mrs. Geller: (laughs) Im not freaking out.
The Salesman: (laughs) You need these books.
Kathy: (laughs) What about the duck?
Phoebe: (laughs) Okay, quit down. (they start to kiss again)
Emily: (laughs) Well, I should hope not. Ross knows better than that by now.
Kathy: (laughs) Oh-oh-oh-oh!
Chandler: (laughs) Right in there!
[Scene: Rosss bedroom, Rachel getting into bed while Ross is reading and laughs.]
Monica: (laughs) Please, its a relief is what it is, is what it is.
Chandler: Gotcha! (laughs)
Chandler: Oh that's so cool! Why would a cop come in here though? They don't serve donuts. (No one laughs.) Y'know what actually, could you discover the badge again? I think I can come up with something better than that.
(Rachel laughs hysterically for no reason.)
(Chandler laughs without opening his mouth.)
Chandler: so then the farmer says, "Thats not a cow and youre not milking it." (Everyone laughs.)
Rachel: Well, they never have any paper in there y'know. So my rule is no tissue, no tuschy. (Phoebe laughs and gets out.) Well, if everybodys going. (She gets out and starts to close the door.)
Chandler: (laughs) Okay, we have to talk. Im just getting out of a very serious relationship
Chandler: (laughs) No you cant.
Emily: (laughs) Ross play rugby? I dont think so.
Monica: (laughs) Okay.
Joey: Ross! (Laughs) Theyre gonna kill you!
Rachel: (laughs) Yeah, okay, at ease solider!
Joey: (Laughs) Of course we do! Mike is playing a game that we used to play in high school. Yeah, where we pretend we don't know each other. We played all kinds of games. (To Mike) Hey, remember the one where I punch you in the face for not being cool?!
Ross: (laughs) Move in with me.
Joey: (laughs) Actually, I didnt know the magazine was paying for it. Wouldnt have mattered, Im doing this for the fans, not for the free food.
(Rachel laughs hysterically.)
Phoebe: (laughs and picks up another lure) And this?
Ross: Okay here, have one of these peppers. Oh ha Oh God! So so hot! (Rubs his eyes.) Oh my(Laughs.) By the way, you dont want to touch the pepper and then touch your eye.
Phoebe: So you do know who he is! (laughs, Ross stares at her) Sorry.
Rachel: (laughs) Oh my God! Oh, thats funny, I cant believe I did that.
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
Phoebe: (laughs) All I could think of was yknow, "Is he gonna kiss me? Is he gonna kiss me?"
Phoebe: (laughs) Thank you.
Monica: (laughs) Yes, I did! And you are welcome!
Ross: (laughs) That uh, that was pretty funny. Wasnt it?
(She laughs and opens the door to reveal Rachel sitting on the bed.)
Monica: (laughs) Thats okay.
Rachel: (laughs) I'm sorry, that's not funny.
Ross: I thought I heard voices! Hi Charlie! (Kisses her.) Hi Joey. (Hugs him.) And.. Oh! You're gonna have to introduce me to your new girlfriend. (Laughs.) I'm just kidding, I know Rachel, I know. (He squeezes her hand.) Come, please come in. Come in.
Emily: Oh, Liam. (Ross laughs and takes her back.)
(She laughs.)
Frank: (laughs) Not to me.
Ross: (laughs as well, but for a different reason) Yeah, I didnt think of that.
Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)
Joey: (laughs, softly) Yeah, the stripper stole it.
Tim: I I-I dont know, but I would say its pretty good-o. (Phoebe laughs too hard.)
Phoebe: Hey, guys, you know what Larry would say? He would say, "See you ladle." (Laughs.)
(Phoebe laughs.)
Phoebe: Okay. (She laughs harder.)
Dr. Leedbetter: (laughs) A sandwich?
(The woman who had tried to steal the washing machine walks by, and laughs.)
Ross: Wha? Oh, come on. You didnt have tosaltwater taffy?! (Mona laughs) Thanks! This is interesting. You know, most people think this is made with sea water, but its actually made with, uh, salted fresh water. Thats not interesting.
Dr. Leedbetter: (laughs) Oh, you know what?
Joey: (laughs) Thats cause sometimes I just do it through my wall to freak you out.
Phoebe: (laughs) Please.
Phoebe: Ohh, (laughs) umm, we kinda took a little detour on the way over here.
Alice: (laughs) No. No. No. (Sits down.) Okay, now, see, I wanna name the girl baby Leslie, and Frank wants to name one of the boy babies Frank JR. JR.
Janice: I love this artichoke thing! Oh, don't tell me what's in it, the diet starts tomorrow! (Laughs her Janice laugh)
Kim: My late husband gave me that lighter. (Rachel laughs.) I'm not kidding.
(Joey laughs then realizes the trick didn't work when Chandler hands him his card back.)
Rachel: (Laughs) Oh, me too.
Rachel: (laughs) I knew that! I knew that! I was just messin with you too!
Rachel: Hello! (She makes a face and the kid laughs harder. Finally, his parents drag him off.) Ohh, kids love me.
Joey: (laughs) You're kidding right?
Gary: (laughs, then suddenly serious) What's up?
Ross: Fine. Fine, but I want the record to show that I tried to take the high road, because in about five minutes Im gonna be saying (He laughs and points at Rachel sarcastically.)
Rachel: (laughs) I cannot believe Ross is buying this!
Monica: I mean I have not been picked on this much since kindergarten and they had to bring in someone from junior high to do the see-saw with me. (Joey laughs and Monica glares at him.)
Rachel: (laughs) What?! Are you crazy?
Paul: Okay. Ill give you one chance to change my mind. (Ross laughs in relief) You got one minute. (Ross suddenly gets worried.)
Rachel: Whoa! (Laughs) Y'know what Katie? I gotta tell ya I-I-I-I think you are the one who is too much. (She punches Katie back.)
Rachel: Oh wow. Why dont we just take me (Grabs her pin) and put me with a Manhattan in my hand, talking to the cute bartender. (Puts her pin at the bar and laughs. Monica just glares at her.) These pins arent for playing are they?
Rachel: Ohh! Oh God! (Laughs her way into the living room.)
Ross: Rach, come on, if you think about it, its actually kinda funny. (He laughs, and he laughs alone.) Okay, maybe its best not to think about it.
(Joey laughs nervously and goes to his bedroom.)
Chandler: Hey ladies! What are you in here for? (Laughs at his joke.)
Monica: I know. Lets try a look of far off wonderment. Okay, well-well gaze into our future and well think about our marriage and the days to come. (Chandler is still not getting it.) Chandler! What is the matter with your face?! I mean this picture is supposed to say "Geller and Bing to be married," not "Local woman saves drowning moron!" (The photographer laughs.) Hey! Dont laugh at him! Hes my drowning moron!
Pete: I know Im no John Bon Jovi, (Monica laughs) or someone who find attractive, Im just, I think, y'know, that you might end up feeling differently.
Chandler: (trying to cover up why his hand is over his heart) One nation, under God. Indivisible with liberty and justice for all. (Laughs.) I remembered it. (Its a butchered version of the Pledge of Allegiance of the United States for our foreign friends.) The champagne is here. (The waiter is delivering it and pouring two glasses.)
Woman No. 1: (laughs) No, I hate cats.