words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, (Ohh, thats the last time Im ever gonna type that line. Its just so sad.) Joey is entering, angrily.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, (And thats the last time for that line, no more Chandler and Joeys or Monica and Rachels, ever!) Joey and Ross are carrying the last table of Rachels. Rachel follows slowly, but is stopped by Monica.]
Chandler: What are you talking about? The couch is perfectly in line with the carpet. And then I can just walk over here and casually just put my feet right up on the...(Tries to rest his feet on the coffee table but they won't reach) OK, OK, here's what we do, we just uh, move the couch closer to the coffee table.
Chandler: Youre right, I have no excuses! I was totally over the line.
Joey: Good evening. Im Mr. Tribbiani. And I will be teaching acting for soap operas. Now um, on my first day as (proudly) Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives, (looks for a reaction from his students, and gets none.) I learned that one of the most important things in soap opera acting is reacting, this does not mean acting again, it means, you dont have a line, but someone else just did. And it goes like this. (looks all intense for a moment and then gasps, the students cheer him) Thanks, thanks, a lot. Oh, by the way, before I forget to work in soap operas some of you will have to become much more attractive. All right, moving right along.
[Scene: The Airport Ticket Counter, Monica and Chandler are standing in line behind another couple kissing who are next in line to be served.]
Joey: (entering) Thats my line! (He walks up the aisle and to the rabbi) I can take it from here, thanks. (To all) Dearly beloved, Im sorry Im a little late. You may be confused by this now, (Hes still in costume) but you wont be Memorial Day weekend 2002. Well, lets get started before the groom takes off again. Huh? (Monica is shocked and looks around.) We are gathered here today, to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. Ive known Monica and Chandler for a long time, and I can not imagine two people more perfect for each other. And now, as Ive left my notes in my dressing room. We shall proceed to the vows. Monica?
(They start lobbing the balloons in. Ross desperately tries to get out of the line of fire but is struck in the back. The girls all retreat to relative safety behind the couch.)
Chandler: Okay, well he totally screwed up the punch line. Y'know, its supposed to be arrghh-eh og-errigh.
Rachel: Ahh .So Wow The spring line, its really going to be great this year, huh?
Rachel: Oh well, the woman I interviewed with was pretty tough, but y'know thank God Mark coached me, because once I started talking about the fall line, she got all happy and wouldnt shut up.
Phoebe: (reading Monica's palm) No, 'cause this line is passion, and this is... just a line.
Joey: (entering) Hey! Hey Chandler look, I know youre mad, but I just want to say Im sorry. I-I was a total jerk. Completely o-over the line. Uh, I just I hate pulp! Yknow? I mean, yknow how Monica feels about low fat mayonnaise?
The Chorus Line: Hallelujah!
(David puts his napkin up to his mouth and starts laughing at his own line. Matt notices him after a while and starts laughing as well.)
Chandler: Oh yeah, and what would my opening line be? 'Excuse me. Blarrglarrghh.'
The Director: Okay. (to Alex) All right uh, Alex now when Joey says his line, "Take good care of your Momma son," thats your cue to cry. Got it? (Alex nods yes.) All right, lets do this.
Ross: No, Chandler, you have to find the line between stealing and taking what the hotel owes you. For example: hair drier, no, no, no, but shampoo and conditioners, yes, yes, yes. (pause) Now, the salt shaker is off-limits, but the salt (he opens the salt shaker and pours the salt into his hand) I wish I'd thought this through.
Joey: (sitting on the arm of the couch)Of course it was a line!
Hoshi: You are iron. You are steel! Let me ask you something, how come when I call your computer support line, I have to wait an hour and a half?
Chandler: No! (Calls) Danielle, hi! It's, uh, it's Chandler! (Listens) I'm fine. Uh, listen, I don't know if you tried to call me, because, uh, idiot that I am, I accidentally shut off my phone. (Listens) Oh, uh, okay, that's fine, that's great. (Listens) Okay. (Puts down the phone.) (to Monica) She's on the other line, she's gonna call me back. (He starts doing a little jig.) She's on the other line, she's gonna call me back, she's on the other line, gonna call me back...
Joey: (bursts out laughing again) I can't believe you didn't know it was a line!
Mark: Here, let me. (answers phone) Rachel Green's line, how may I help you?
Ursula: Yeah, its a fine line huh?
[Scene: A counter at a government building. Phoebe's waiting in line.]
Chandler: Hey, y'know, I have had it with you guys and your cancer and your emphysema and your heart disease. The bottom line is, smoking is cool, and you know it.
JOEY: But this is a two line part, it's like takin' a step backwards. I'm not gonna do this.
Donny: You crossed the line. Joey, describe for Gene these things that have lines. Give me 20 seconds on the clock, please. Ready, go!
Monica: Guys, hurry up! The flight leaves in four hours! It could take time to get a taxi! There could be traffic! The plane could leave early! When we get to London, there could be a line at customs! Come on!! (She runs back to her apartment.)
Joey: Over the line?! You-youre-youre so far past the line, that you-you cant even see the line! The line is a dot to you!
(Phoebe desperately tries to find the scripted response to that line.)
[Scene change back an forth: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, Monica's on the other end of the line. The phone's speaker is turned on, so the rest of the gang, sitting around the phone, can hear Chandler.]
JOEY: That's a two line part.
MONICA: Really? I'm perfectly comfortable. [one of the guest opens the refrigerator] Hey, hey, hey, get in line buddy, I was next. [she opens the refrigerator and leans into it]
Chandler: Oh no no no.. I'll get her. I'm super-compentent and totally responsibile and fourth in line to raise Emma. I'll be right there Emma. Just let me get my trusty diaper bag here. <knocks over the box of china> Well.. what do you know? I guess, I'll be the one who dies first.
Ross: Well, it was the only thing to do there that didn't have a line.
Monica: No! No, no... wait! We didn't lose. (turns to Chandler) The rules clearly stated that the last one to cross the finish line was the loser. Well, our dog never crossed the finish line, so technically...
[Scene: The Xerox place, Chandler and Joey are waiting in line.]
(They both start speaking Italian to each other, and since I'm not Italian and don't understand one word, we'll move on to the English portion of the show. Not, that I'm English. Not that there's anything wrong with that, it's just that I'm not. Y'know I think I should shut-up now and move on. Anyhoo, she says something about Joey being fat I think based on this line.)
Hold Voice: Please stay on the line. Youre call is very important to us.
Joanna: Congratulations! You now just crossed the line into completely useless. Get out. (Sophie starts to cry and leaves)
[Time lapse, they have set up a little assembly line for diaper changes. Phoebe wipes, Chandler adds the powder, begrudgingly, and Monica puts the diaper on.]
The Croupier: Comin' out. Place your bet. (Monica does so.) Dice are out. (The woman next to Monica rolls the dice.) Double or nothin'! Pay the front line! (Monica won and doubled the chip.)
Rachel: Yeah, I know. I had the greatest day though, I got to sit in on the meeting with the reps from Calvin Klien. I told my boss I liked this line of lingerie, she ordered a ton of it. How was your day?
Joey: Look, we were way out of line, we totally support you.
{There's another continuity error here. Before Monica says I love you, Chandler's holding the vests so that you couldn't see the collar, you could see all three, and they were folding nicely. After she says the line and the camera cuts back to Chandler, you can only see two out of the three, you can see the collar of the top one, and it looks like it was folded sloppily, unlike before. Hey, you notice things while spending this much time on this!}
Ross: You have a line down your face.
JOEY: Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'
Casting Director #2: No, the line is pick a bag, so you need to pick up the bag.
Phoebe: Sure! Look, ok, bottom line: I love Mike... David! David. I love David. Don't look at me that way, Roseanne Rosannadanna!
[Scene: Joey and Ben's audition, Joey is rehearsing his lines, uh correction, Joey is rehearsing his line.]
Ross: Come on! The time we were all waiting in line for Dances With Wolves and that one guy cut in line in front of us and I just lost it?! Screamed at him! Turned all red! Red Ross!!
Chandler: Youre right, I have no excuses! I was totally over the line.
Phoebe: I'm sorry you guys but, you know, Mike's got his brother and his friends from school so... you know, you were-you were... if it helps you, you were next in line, you just-you just missed the cut.
JADE: Hi, it's me. Listen, Bob. I'm probably way out of line here. I mean, It has been 3 years, and you're probably seeing someone else now, but if we could just have one night together, just for old time's sake, one hot, steamy, wild night...
Chandler: She's really going to love this, you know? The bottom line is I want her to have it, even if I don't get to be the one who gives it to her.
CHANDLER: [to an attractive woman] I shouldn't even bother coming up with a line, right? [The woman walks away]
Ross: Nice. And by the way that uh, that line down my face?
Ross: Wh-wh-what line? The line that prompted a student in my last class of the day to say uh, (In a college frat boy voice) "Dude, dont you ever was your face?"
Rachel: What line?
Monica: Toe the line. Thread the needle. Think outside the box! (Tries to leave, but is stopped by Rachel.)
Nancy: So anyway I sent the designs over to Ralph and he's very excited about the line.
Rachel: Thats a line from the show too!
Joey: Over the line?! You-youre-youre so far past the line, that you-you cant even see the line! The line is a dot to you!
(She crosses the line and they all cheer again.)
[Scene: Classroom. Joey is writing his name on the board, but turns around before hes done which causes him to write his name with a downward curve, and he then underlines it, and draws the line right through his name.]
[Scene: A newsstand, Ross is buying a magazine and gets in line behind a woman.]
Phoebe: Oh, well get in line missy. (To Ross) So, can I have a ride stud?
{Transcibers note: In case youre wondering, and I know you are. Their names are all back to normal. Just in a slightly smaller font than usual to allow Courteney Cox Arquette to fit on one line and not be smaller than the rest of their names. Now, on with the show }
The Chorus Line: Amen!
Rachel: Okay. NowWhat is my first line?
Joey: Hey! Handcuffs! And fur line, nice! I didn't know you guys had it in ya!
David: Now, we should go back and take the other line.
Monica: I know that switch does something, okay? So-so I went down to city hall and got these. All I had to do was pay $25 and wait in line for three hours.
Chandler: You know, I don't mind a... male nanny, but I do draw the line at a male wetnurse. (again they laugh, even more fake than before)
Joey: Terrible! I messed up every line! I shouldnt even be an actor!
Rachel: (thinks about it for a second) No! Ross, come on! No! Listen, look I thought a lot about how to tell you this and the bottom line, Ross, is we can not stay married.
(Matt turns back and looks and them, but instead of his next line he starts laughing.)
Ross: Oh when you beeped me I was on line at the concession stand at the movie theater.
Phoebe: (on the other side of the line, still pretending to be Estelle) Joey, it's Estelle. (Joey's eyes bulge up, he looks afraid)
Joey: I know Im having the worst time. There was a 15-minute line for the buffet, and when I finally got up to the plates, I slipped on a giant booger!
Joey: (To Chandler) In what John Houston film would you hear this line, "Badges? We dont need no stinkin badges!"
Joey: Shh, OK, here I come, here I come. See I'm comin' to fix the copier, I can't get to the copier, I'm thinkin' what do I do, what do I do so I just watch 'em have sex. And then I say, wait, here's my line, (Joey from TV) you know that's bad for the paper tray.
Phoebe: Five minutes ago, a line like that wouldve floored me. Now nothing. Well, not nothing, I am still a woman.
{Y'know, sometimes I think the script writers throw in a line like that to try to trip me up. But it won't work. I'll always have the last laugh! <manical_laugh.wav> Okay, so maybe I'm a little deluded, it's probably just my spellchecker. But, I must admit I did get Mesozoic and Paleozoic on the first attempt. Yay me! Anyhoo }
Joey: 18, uh? (starts to prepare himself to say his "How You Doin'" line) Ross: Joey, NO!
Chandler: Hello? Is someone on the line?
[The next flashback is from The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line. He's telling Joey that he kissed Cathy.]
The Director: I dont think so. Lets take it back to Richards last line. (Walks off.) Action!
Rachel: All right, how about I go over there and I will walk into Chandler's bedroom and I will see that thing that I think that I know is actually the thing that I think that I know! (Note: Kudos to Ms. Aniston on the delivery of that line. She said it very quickly and didn't screw up a word. Try it yourself, it ain't that easy.)
Rachel: I say ‘cheesy line’, but ok.
Estelle: (on the other side of the line) Joey! It's Estelle!
Rachel: Well look, if you dont like this (The audiences laughter at Chandlers progress cuts out the rest of Rachels line.)
Gene: I'll take "You crossed the line".
Clerk: You need to fill out this form. (motions for the next person in line)
Rachel: Ross, I have been walking around like this since the plane! I canyou have so crossed a line. (Heads for the bathroom)
Rachel: Ross? Look, whatever this relationship stuff that Emily wants, just give it to her. Come on, the bottom line here is that you love her. So just fix whatever she wants fixed. Just do it. (The phone starts ringing.) I mean, you're gonna have to try. You'll just gonna hate yourself if you don't. (The phone keeps ringing.) Oh come on answer it! It's driving me crazy!
Rachel: You know honey, there is a thin line between love and hate, and it turns out that line...is a scarf!
Clerk: Get out of my line.
Chandler: Well, Im upsetfor you. I mean, having sex with an endless line of beautiful women must be very unfulfilling for you. (He cant believe he just sad that.)
RACHEL: Well it's not, honey I'm sorry, I guess I'm just nervous. I mean, it's you, ya know, it's us. I mean, we're crossing that line, sort of a big thing.
(They start making out and both start to feel something growing below the belt line.)