words in movies
Monica: Hey, look at me. I'm making jam, been at it since 4 o'clock this morning.
Joey: Nooo. I had a story all worked out but then Chandler sold me out.
Phoebe: (turns around) Um, that's it. No. Hey! You! J. Crew guy. Yeah. Why have you been following me? I mean, all week long everywhere I look there's you.
Phoebe: Wait, (grabs him) you know what, I got a little story. When I was in Junior High School I went through this period where I thought I was a witch. And there was this guidance counselor who said something to me, that I think will help you a lot. He said okay, 'you're not a witch you're just an average student.' See what I'm saying?
Phoebe: Okay. (they start to leave, he is still following her) Okay, you don't have to walk behind me any more.
Chandler: Okay, I accept that. When Janice asked me and I said no, she took that to mean that I was calling her a cow.
Ross: Noo! No, not cuddlily, not me, just her. I'm like you, I need the room. Okay, come here. (they sit on the couch and Ross puts his hands on Chandler's shoulder and thigh.) Okay, you're in bed...
Phoebe: Hey, oh, you know that guy who's been following me? I talked to him today.
Phoebe: Okay, first I'm not crazy. And second, say it don't spray it. Anyway his name is Malcom, and he wasn't following me, I mean he was, but 'cause he thought I was Ursula, ick. And, that's why, that's why he couldn't just come up and talk to me. 'Cause of the restraining order.
Monica: I'm talking about me having a baby.
Monica: Yeah. The great thing about the jam plan was, I was taking control of my life. So I asked myself, what is the most important thing to me in the world and that's when I came up with the baby plan.
Monica: It took me 28 years to find one man that I wanna spend my life with, if I have to wait another 28 years then, I'll be 56 before I can have a baby, and that's just stupid.
Malcom: (reading) I met Phoebe today. She was really nice to me eventhough I'm such a loser. And, then when I was walking home I thought about her a lot, it was weird, but kinda cool.
Monica: Lips moving, still talking. I mean it may not be ideal, but I'm so ready. No, I-I-I see the way Ben looks at you. It makes me ache, you know?
Joey: Let me see. (goes over and looks at the form) Oh, right.
Phoebe: Oh, no, no, no, no. You know what, he's not into that stuff anymore. He quit for me.
Phoebe: Look, he gave me his night vision goggles and everything.
Janice: Oh. God, crazy Chandler. He spun me...off...the...bed!
Malcom: Were you following me?
Malcom: So you spied on me. I can't believe you don't trust me. (Ursula walks past, and Malcom finds behind the pillar)
Phoebe: Oh well, what do you know, there goes my identical twin sister. Just walkin' along looking like me. What, is this just like a freakish coincidence, or did you know she takes this train?
Phoebe: No, no, it's not your fault. You know it's partly my fault, 'cause I made you quit cold turkey. Sorry, no. Okay, well, I mean, I can't date you anymore, 'cause your, you know (in a high pitched voice) Wow! But um, but I will definitely, definitely help you get over my sister. Okay, stalk me for a while. Huh? Yeah, and, and, and, I'll be like an Ursula patch.
Joey: Sure you do, it was a gift from me. Oh! And you have these three great kids.
Joey: I called the sperm bank today, they haven't sold a single unit of Tribianni. Nobody wants my product. I mean, I-I-I don't get it (tries to drink the rest of the jam out of the jar and gets it all over his face, on his chin, nose, etc.) Maybe if they met me in person.
Chandler: Y'know, he won't even talk to me. How am I going to apologize to him if he won't even talk to me?
Pete: So ask me what I did today.
Rachel: Well, I havent seen him since that night that he told me how he yknow I dont know, I think hes avoiding me. Why is that bagel on the floor?
Monica: Can you believe he just offered me a restaurant?
Rachel: What a jerk! You want me to kick his ass?
Frank Jr.: You just don't know how hard it is, Phoebe. There's just so many of them. You know, two I can handle. Two's great. You just hold one in each hand, but what do I do when the third one runs at me with his bike helmet on. I've got no more hands to protect my area! There's three of them, Phoebe, three!
Joey: Oh yeah, and shes really nice too! She taught me about yknow, how to work with the cameras and smell-the-fart acting.
Phoebe: Hi! Wish me luck!
Chandler: Excuse me?
Monica: Oh my God! Hes gonna rat me out!
Rachel: There were times when it wasn't even me.
Rachel: Well, not myself, but I know other people that have. Ok, you caught me. I'm a laundry virgin.
Phoebe: (in voice, on phone) 'Okay, go ahead.' (in normal voice on phone) Um, hi Annie. (listens) Fantastic! (to Joey) You got it. (on phone) Oh, okay, um, 'Will he work for scale?' you ask me. Well, I don't know about that, (Joey clears his throat to signify yes) except that I do and he will. Great, oh you are such a sweetheart. I would love to have lunch with you, how about we have lunch next....(hangs up phone) Op, went through a tunnel.
Phoebe: Excuse me, but umm, isnt he paying for your dinner?
Rachel: Okay. Oh wait, wait-wait, youre not gonna come with me?
Chandler: (loud) Ken, please! No, I can�t, I can�t smoke. If I smoke, my wife would kill me.
Monica: I justI cant believe that you think that you and Chandler know me and Rachel better than we know you.
RACH: And I'm in it? Then let me read it.
Rachel: Okay, youd tell me the truth. Right?
Joey: No! I want an award I did win! But nobodys giving me any of those! PlusHey Rach, if-if I put it up there (Points to the TV) right? When people come over theyll see it and theyll think I won it.
Rachel: Ross, why didnt you tell me that?
Rachel: Hey! Thats just poking me in the eye!
Chandler: Oh, come on. You told me about the last dream.
Rachel: I meant, me plus one!
Phoebe: Well, what I really want is for my mom to be alive and enjoy it with me.
Cailin: (to Ross) Hi! Remember me?
Ross: Uh, Rach, do you want me to shuffle those?
Rachel: Oh, really, well Ross, you know what? I am a big girl. I don't need someone telling me what is best for me.
Chandler: Please, please, please, don't be mad at me.
Frank: (hiding under a pile of clothes) Hi. (She jumps up screaming.) Wait, no! Just put the mail down. Its-its me!
Joey: Kate, do you even like me?
Rachel: No-no-no! No-no-no! Please Ross, I cant! I cant do it! (Starts to freak out.) Its just gonna freak me out!!!
RACHEL: Would you let me talk. [flicks Monica on the forehead]
Rachel: Would you excuse me, please? I'm trying to have a date here.
Rachel: Well maybe it would make me feel better if I slept with Joey.
Ross: Okay, fine, fine. You dont want to believe me? No, thats fine. (starts to leave)
Ross: (To Rachel, standing by her feet) I dont know why you cant admit that you need me.
Kate: They still want me for General Hospital.
Ross: Fun? Where was the fun? Tell me specifically, which part was the fun part? Where's my puck?
Monica: Pete's breaking up with me.
Joey: Well whats fun about that? You expect me to be the host of a boring game thats just people standing around answering questions?
Monica: Oh no-no-no, it's still me.
Ross: She barely knows me. We just live in the same building.
Pete: Look, the only who stands to get hurt is me. And Im okay with that.
Monica: Oh umm, that's because I just wanted to y'know walk in on me and Chandler while we were, y'know, doing it all night. Will you excuse me for just a second?
Joey: Me too. Alright, whattaya got.
Chandler: At least let me smoke it to the good part.
Robin: Why? Why?! Whats wrong with me?!
The Director: (stepping in) Excuse me. Excuse me. (to Kate) Sweetheart! (Kisses her.) Come! (They leave.)
Rachel: (She drops the brush) Y'know what? I cannot do this with my left hand! Would you please, help me with this too?
Billy: Its me, Ive been sleeping with your wife.
Rachel: Yeah, Im pretty confident about that. Thats what makes it so easy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler! It would be nice to have a little guarantee though.
Monica: Actually there is. Chandler usually helps me with this, but hes really into the game so I dont want to bother him. Could you help me fold these napkins? (Hands her a stack of them.)
Ross: Seven years. I mean weve been together seven years, shes the only woman whos ever loved me, and the only woman Ive-Ive ever....
Chandler: Oh, yeah. Yeah, I found this great place called "Invisible things for Kathy." (Motions to an imaginary pile of presents next to him.) Can you give me a hand with all this stuff?
Rachel: So I was with Joshua for an hour today, and he has not asked me out. Its just so frustrating!
Rachel: How could you not tell me that she has hair?
Ross: None of the sane ones wanted to come back with me! That�s not the point. Ok? The point is you...you are the oneWho moved on and didn�t tell anyone!
Steve: Oh look, you don't have to give it too me right now! You can slip it under my door. (Points to his apartment across the hall.)
Monica: I know this is going to sound unbelievably selfish, but, were you planning on bringing up the whole baby/lesbian thing? Because I think it might take some of the heat off me.
Joey: Oh well, the little girl who lives here made me feel a lot better about the whole thing.
Ross: Look Rachel, I wanted to tell you, I thought I should, I-I did, and then Chandler and Joey convinced me not to.
Gary: I know, really well. In fact, I'm gonna ask Phoebe to move in with me.
Monica: (entering) Oh my God! You are gonna love me so much! I felt really bad about the whole bachelorette party thing, so tonight youre gonna have a bachelor party.
Rachel: You give me back my Walkman!
Joey: Maybe you can tell me. My agent would like to know why I didn't show up at the audition I didn't know I had today. The first good thing she gets me in weeks. How could you not give me the message?!
Phoebe: No! Rachel, thats what they want me to do. My warranty expires tomorrow, if I dont get through, theyre not gonna fix my crappy, broken phone for free! We cannot let them win! Its us versus them!
Monica: Please tell me youre stopping now.
Ross: Hmm -you know, actually this'll work out well. Cause when you have to move back in with Joey, Joey's hot new roommate can come and live with me.
Rachel: No, no, no, no turtles scare me. I don't need that today.
Chandler: (reading the back of the picture) Me and Frank and Phoebe, Graduation 1965.
The Director: You guys make me fly! High! Okay, were gonna pick it up here, tomorrow.
Rachel: Ross gave it to me.
Joey: No-no-no-no-no, it's-it's uh, you just uh, uh reminded me that uh, I need to do my stretches too. (Starts to stretch, groans painfully)
Phoebe: (points to herself) Phoebe. (points to her) Phoebe. Phoebe, yeah. She named me after you I guess.
Phoebe: (disappointed) Oh, okay. Well, so tell me everything about my parents. Everything.
Monica: No! (Pause) But, theyre callin out to me! I mean this little guy (Holds up a small one) even crawled up into my lap. Oh come on, Chandler wouldnt mind if I opened just one present! What do you think it is?
Phoebe: No, and so there's no one to walk me down the aisle and... well, I would just really love it if you would do it.
Phoebe: Excuse me. Excuse me! (Mrs. Bukart stops singing) Thanks. Um, clearly this is a very, very hard time for you. Um, but, um, we provided a service, and we deserve to be paid because you ate that service, and, um, we are not leaving here until we're paid every penny. 'Cause you know what, lady? We're part time caterers, and we have no place else to go.
Ross: Whoa, hey! What are doing? Trying to get me drunk?
ROB: Because that would be fantastic. What? You wanna kiss me?
Ross: You still love me?
Ross: You still love me.
Rachel: Oh, y-yeah, so, you-you love me!
Minister: Ross and Emily have made their declarations and it gives me great pleasure to declare them husband and wife.
Monica: Yeah could-could-could you get me something to drink?
Joshua: Yeah, yeah, let me show you around. This is the uh, downstairs living room.
Monica: (chuckles) Hmm, well you're around me all the time and you don't flirt.
Rachel: (throws her stuff down) I was gonna give you a chance to apologise to me.
Chandler: Excuse me, Doug? (no reaction) Hey there sports fan!!
Joey: So, tell me. Was it like you and Chandler, and then you and me, or you and me and Chandler?
Chandler: All right, theres a nuclear holocaust, Im the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?
Monica:: do you know how many times I've seen him jump up like that, believe me I know what he was doing.
Chandler: Ugh. Just a sec, give me a minute to wake up for thisAh-ha-ha!! You lost the ring! Youre the worst best man ever!
Chandler: Me too!!
Joey: Me too.
RACH: Oh my God. Oh my God Ross, no, hang up the phone, give me the phone Ross, give me the phone, give me the phone, give me the. . . [jumps the couch and lands on Ross's back, finally getting the phone from him. Ross has a confused expression on his face.]
Dana: Apparently Howies editing now. Yeah, he-he-he calls me up and asks me if he can edit my new movie. Can you believe that?! Yknow I-I-I havent spoken to him in like ten years and he asks me for a favor!
Monica: Promise me youll be careful.
Monica: Please, could you just try it for me? Come on, I used all my best stuff! I-I-I lit some candles. I put on some music. I used bath salts, plus bubble bath! And got you this little plastic Navy ship. So its a boy bath!