words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is eating some Chinese food.]
Phoebe: (looking out the window) Oh, look! There's Monica and Chandler! (Starts yelling.) Hey! Hey, you guys! Hey! (Chandler and Monica start taking each other's clothes off.) Ohh!! Ohh! Ahh-ahhh!!
Phoebe: (screaming) Ahhh!! Chandler and Monica!! Chandler and Monica!!
Phoebe: CHANDLER AND MONICA!!!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are there talking about Chandler and Monica.]
Phoebe: You mean whenever Monica and Chandler where like y'know doing laundry or going grocery shopping orOh! All that time Monica spent on the phone with sad Linda from camp!
Rachel: Phoebe just found out about Monica and Chandler.
[Scene: Chandler's bedroom, Chandler and Monica are there, of course. Like who else would it be, duh!]
Monica: You are so cute! How did you get to be so cute?
Monica: Okay, now you're even cuter!!
Monica: What?
Monica: What are you talking about?
Monica: That's not possible!
Monica: I'm sorry it's just, Phoebe just always thought you were, you were charming in a, in a sexless kind of way.
Monica: I'm sorry, I think that you just misunderstood her.
Monica: This bicep?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Chandler are there. Monica is entering from her room.]
Monica: Uhh, y'know actually I was gonna do some laundry.
Monica: Hey Chandler, wanna do it with me?
Monica: Okay.
Monica: I mean I-I don't I think I have enough quarters.
Monica: Oh, is it that pinball machine with the big bow on it?
Monica: Well what did you send?
Monica: Bye!
Monica: Actually, I did!
Monica: Ohhh, oh my God! Oh my God! She knows about us!
Monica: Phoebe knows and she's just trying to freak us out! That's the only explanation for it!
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, Joey is snoozing with Hugsy, his bedtime penguin pal and Chandler and Monica come storming in.]
Monica: Them?! Who's them?
Monica: Joey!
Monica: Unless
Monica: Oh man, they think they are so slick messing with us! But see they don't know that we know that they know! So
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is looking at Ugly Naked Guy's apartment through binoculars.]
Chandler: Hello Phoebe, I've been thinking about you all day. (He's holding the phone so that Monica can hear it as well.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica and Rachel and Phoebe are planning their respective strategies to break the other pairing. Joey is not amused.
Monica: (in the kitchen with Chandler) Look at them, they're-they're panicked!
Monica: Oh yeah!
(She saunters over to Chandler with a mean pair of 'Come hither' eyes and she glares at Monica.)
(As she walks away, Chandler mouths a scream to Monica. How motions and mouths, "It's okay, it's okay.")
Rachel: Oh yeah! (She gasps.) Oh my God! That is our friend! (Monica covers her face.) It's Naked Ross! (Monica turns and buries her face in Chandler's shoulder.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is getting Phoebe ready for her date.]
[Cut to Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, Monica is getting Chandler ready for his half of the plan.]
Monica: All right, it'll be great! You just make her think you wanna have sex with her! It'll totally freak her out!
Monica: Relax, she-she's gonna give in way before you do!
Monica: Because you're on my team! And my team always wins!
Monica: Just go get some! (Kisses him.) Go! (She runs to hide in the bathroom.)
Monica: She's bluffing!
Monica: You go back out there and you seduce her till she cracks!
Monica: Of course.
[Cut back to the living room. Chandler slowly exits the bathroom and gets pushed from behind by Monica and sees Phoebe closing the apartment door.)
Chandler: Because I'm in love with Monica!!
(Monica comes out of the bathroom like a bolt, and Rachel and Joey both enter.)
Chandler: Love her! That's right, I LOVE HER!!! I love her!! (They walk together and hug.) I love you, Monica.
Monica: I love you too Chandler. (They kiss.)
Monica: Well actually, Ross doesn't.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's bedroom, theyre cuddling.]
Monica: What?
Monica: Just mine?
[Scene: The Waiting Room, Monica is on the phone with her mother, Chandler is standing behind her.]
Monica: I cant believe this! (Storms out.)
MONICA: For the sixteenth time, no... I do not think you're obsessive.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle as Rachel enters.]
Chandler: (To Monica) Its a nickname, Ill explain later.
Monica: (shocked) What?!
(Ross gets up to let his dad sit next to Monica.)
Monica: All right!
Monica: (opening it) Whats this?
Monica: Wait, youre giving me your Porsche, youre kidding me right?!
Monica: (entering) Hey guys!
Monica: (grabbing the gift from him and opening it) Okay! There you go! It's two tickets to Vegas!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe is telling Chandler and Monica how she fought crime in her own way with the badge she found.]
Phoebe: I cant believe that! Now the only thing left of my grandmothers legacy is this crumb. (She picks it up with her finger and holds it out to Monica.) I wish you a long and happy marriage.
Monica: Happy birthday!!!
Monica: Its your birthday!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are entering. As Phoebe is sitting down, she recognizes someone sitting at the counter.]
Phoebe: Rachel! Come on out! Monica made breakfast!
[Flashback to Joeys thirtieth birthday party. It is being held in Monica and Chandlers apartment.]
Monica: Well, I mean what about friends of your grandmothers? Wouldnt they have the recipe?
Monica: Rach, youre in a great place in your life. Come on, youve got a great job! Good friends
Monica: Yeah, Ill have a scotch
Monica: Did you eat all the neighbor candy?!
Monica: Oh please! (To Chandler) Did you hear that? Little drops of heaven.
Monica: I'm sure everything's fine. Has her water broke yet?
Monica: So I don't have to sing and I can just sit there and pass judgments on others?
Monica: I cant believe you bought this.
Monica: Oh, my mothers right. Im never going to get married.
Monica: No! No-no! He is totally incompetent. I called the chef who recommended him to me. He said, "Ha-ha! Gotcha!"
Ross: Monica had such a crush on him. Yeah, she used to kiss his poster every night before she went to bed.
Monica: Werent you asked to leave sonny?
Monica: Look at this. (Hands him the newspaper.)
Monica: Chocolate-chip pancakes!
Chandler: (To Joey) Would you put that back on?! Monicas gonna be here any minute!
Monica: Really?! You promise?
Monica: Noo!!
Monica: Noo!!!
Monica: Okay. I love you so much. (Kisses him.)
Monica: Oh no! My parents have never seen me drunk! (Pause) That they know of.
Monica: Okay. I can do that.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
(Phoebe turns and looks at Monica, while Joey frantically motions to Chandler to help him out.)
Monica: Yay!
Monica: Phil!
Monica: (sees someone) Paul!
Monica: Awwwww (Giggles.)
Monica: Well, theyre just gonna have to wait arent they? Ive only got two hands!!
Monica: All right, that's it. You know what? Just get out of my way and stop moping.
Chandler: Monicas wasted.
Chandler: Monicas a little drunk.
Monica: Oh no sweetie, no! This is my fault, I wasnt clear! Im really sorry. And listen, you take as much time as you need to move out okay? Theres absolutely no rush.
Monica: Im sick of the signs! Its too fast, Im happy the way things are!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, Ross, and Chandler are watching Phoebe polish the daisies on her bike outside.]
Monica: All you had to do was buy the card!
Monica: (entering) Hey guys!
Monica: (entering) Hey, you guys.
Monica: For your information, ass munch, I've lost four pounds. Maybe even five with all the dancing. (A guy enters holding a pizza box)
(Monica sits down on the barca lounger.)
Chandler: (To Monica) How are you feeling?
Monica: Ha, ha, very funny, very funny. But I think we'd like to give poker another try. Shall we, ladies?
Mrs. Geller: Speech! Come on Monica!
Monica: Oh man!
Monica: Hes gonna eat the cake!
Monica: What about your breath?! (Breathes on him.)
(They spilt into their sexes and the girls read Monicas and the guys read Chandlers. The girls gasp and groan and the guys laugh hysterically.
Monica: I'm not really here. Just thought I'd drop these off...on the way.. my way... Do you come here a lot? Without me?
Chandler: (To Ross) Monica said wedding.
Monica: Okay, so Ross will be doing the reading.
Monica: Yeah, it's just we don't think of you as really being so much "with the words".
Monica: Do you mind telling us what it is?
Monica: Wouldnt you love to do it just once?! (Raises her hand towards Chandler.)
Monica: Who are they killing off?
Rachel and Monica: Noo!!
PHOE: Ok, all right. We want to hear everything. Monica, get the wine and unplug the phone. Rachel, does this end well or do we need to get tissues?
Monica: Why did I 'woo-hoo'? I mean, what was I hoping would happen? That-that he'd turn round and say 'I love that sound, I must have you now'?
Monica: Mom says it's all of Manhattan, parts of Brooklyn and Queens, and they have no idea when it's coming back on.
Monica: Rosss apartment is nice! How come we don't hang out here more often?
Monica: It sounds like its coming from across the street.
Monica: What is that?
Chandler: (To Monica) Shes not as pretty as she was when she was 29.
Monica: What?
Monica: Nooo!!
Monica: So-so you wouldve just lied?
Monica: Please! I made this game what it is.
[Scene: Monicas birthday, its just after the surprise.]
(Ross angrily throws the kit into one of Monicas new boxes.)
Monica: Do you want some shortbread? Eh thats Scottish like you are.
Monica: What if I turn out the lights? (Runs to shut them off.)
Monica: And y'know what, I just realised, in the last year Ive only gone out with two guys, Richard and Julio. You gotta help me out here, you gotta set me up, you gotta get me back in the game.
JOEY: [Monica walks back in the kitchen] Ok ok ok ok. Monica, we'll bring him, but only if he takes the Jaguar.
Monica: (yelling at the top of her lungs) Im engaged!!!!!! Im engaged!!!!
Monica: No, you said the baby creeps you out.
Monica: Hey. So um, I was thinking that maybe we should start dividing up our stuff.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, the gang minus Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast. Ross and Chandler are sitting at the foosball table and eating.]
Monica: What is DOOL?
Joey: (examining it) Ohh, a hunk of sandwich from last year. (Monica drops the sandwich)
MONICA: Ok, which one of us do you think is gonna be the first one to get married?