words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. They're in the kitchen as Rachel enters.]
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Sure, we'll do that. What are you up to?
Monica: Oh my god.
Monica: Just figured, 'cause you and Ross are...
Monica: You want a job? Turn off "Oprah," and send out a resume!
Monica: Oh, it's perfect.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Emma is there in her playpen, while Chandler is behind the couch.]
(Monica enters from their bedroom with a calendar.)
Monica: Okay, just so you know, I'm gonna be ovulating from tomorrow until the sixth, so don't touch yourself in the next 48 hours.
(Monica looks at him.)
Monica: Yeah.
Monica: No, it's not.
Monica: Oh my god. Today's the sixth?! I may be done ovulating! I may have also served some very questionable meat at the restaurant.
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Hey, where are all my ovulation-sticks? There's only one here.
Monica: Chandler!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica emerges from the bathroom.]
Monica: We're okay. I'm still ovulating.
Monica: So, let's do this.
Monica: Come on. I know you're not eighteen anymore, but give it a minute.
Monica: Oh my god, Emma. Oh, sweetie, I forgot you were here. Oh, you're right, we can't do this. We can't leave her alone.
Monica: Unless... Maybe we do it here. I mean, how much can she even be aware of at this age?
Monica: Canoodling?
Monica: I don't know. I mean, I guess having sex in front of a baby isn't so...
Monica: I guess you're right.
Monica: But what kind of a sick bastard wants to do it in front of a deer?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Emma has fallen asleep in her playpen, and Chandler has fallen asleep right next to her on the floor. He's even sucking on a pacifier.]
Monica: She's asleep. Chandler?
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: She's asleep.
Monica: Yes, but we have to be fast.
Monica (laughs): Okay, I'll try.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. They're done and come out of their bedroom. Emma is still gone.]
Monica: Well, that was weird. You were loud, and I was fast.
Monica: Oh, I wish I didn't have to wait to take a pregnancy test.
Monica: Oh my god, where's Emma? Where's Emma?
Monica: Okay, okay, I'm sure that Rachel came home early and picked up Emma. You go look across the hall, and I'll call her cell.
Monica: Hey, you better hope that we're pregnant, because one way or another, we're giving a baby back to Rachel.
Monica (on phone): Hey, Rach, how's it going?
Rachel (to Steve): Look, you know what, I'm sorry, but did you really think that this was going well? (To Monica.) What's up?
Monica: Hey, did you stop by here?
Monica: Oh my god, then...
Monica: Oh, thank god! Emma, there you are!
Monica: Oh, we were playing "peek-a-boo." She just � she loves it when I'm dramatic.
(Monica hangs up, and Rachel looks at her phone.)
Monica (to Joey): Why the hell did you take her?
Monica: No, we weren't!
Monica: No, please don't. Please, Joey. She will kill us!
Monica: Unless what?
Ross: Monica told me you had a blind date.
Monica: It's worse. The only thing that's getting me through is knowing that I'm gonna be seeing you soon. I think I may even try to get out of here early.
Monica: What we did was wrong. Oh god, I just had sex with somebody that wasn't alive during the Bicentennial.
Monica: -leg?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, except Joey, is there. Phoebe is, well you y'know.]
Monica: Well, now she has no eyebrows, mission accomplished.
(Monica closes the door and slowly walks into Rachel’s old and now empty room.)
Monica: Hey guys check it out! My mom sent me the paper!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the girls are still out on the balcony.]
Monica: Oh my God, I went to high school with her. (to Rachel) Rachel! Hi!
Monica: I cant do it! (Ross falls into Monicas room)
Monica: I will! But not tonight. For dinner music, I thought we could listen to that tape you made me.
Monica: Come on, okay, come on this is for all womankind. Lets kill um!
Monica: Amen.
Chandler: (glaring at her) Well, Monica and Chandler cant go. Were going to dinner remember?!
[Time lapse. Chandler and Joey are making the fire, Monica and Phoebe are inside. Ross enters, carrying luggage.]
MONICA: How can I not do it? I have $127 in the bank.
Monica: (answers the phone) Hello? (Listens.) (To Phoebe) It's Joey. (Phoebe's proud of herself.) (To Joey) I'm so glad you called! Chandler told me what happened. Y'know he's really upset about it.
Monica and Phoebe: Hugh! Hugh Grant!
Monica: Come on! (The girls all run out and Joey holds up Chandler by smiling.)
[Scene: Central Perk, the next day Rachel, Phoebe, and Chandler are there as Monica enters.]
Monica: (laughing) Oh, dont you guys look cute. You guys make such a cute couple.
Parker: No, no, no wait! Dont tell me. Let me guess. (Points as he says their names) Joey, Monica, Ross, Rachel and, Im sorry Phoebe didnt mention you. (Chandler makes a face) Chandler, Im kidding all ready youre my favorite!
Monica: Umm, okay. If its a boy its Daniel.
Rachel: Ohh... (Ross mouths HA-HA at Monica and takes two cookies and she looks at him angrily)
Rachel: (To Monica) Im okay! Im okay! (She knocks on Mr. Heckles's window.) Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
Monica: Oh, so there is gonna be a fifth date?
MONICA: Ok, it is definitely less than a ballpark.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Monica are standing in the kitchen.]
[Scene: Central Perk. The entire gang is there, and Chandler and Monica are handing out presents.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is there as enter except Joey enter.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is holding a book as she, Rachel, and Monica drink some tea as Chandler looks on.]
Chandler: (entering) Hey Monica, here's your broom back.
Chandler: Look, Monica has been working hard all day, she didn't wanna host this thing in the first place, we shouldn't go!
Monica: (to all) Okay, please be good, please. Just remember how much you all like me.
Monica: Right, you only go for them 5 minutes before they get married.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are returning from Central Perk.]
Monica: Ugh, yknow, umm we gotta get up early and catch that plane for New York.
Monica: It's so weird, how did Joey end up kissing Charlie last night? I thought you'd end up kissing Charlie.
PHOEBE: Ok. Listen, just don't say anything about me, ok. [goes over and grabs the phone that's sitting by Monica]
Monica: You know what would be real weird? Is if you werent there. Just say youll think about it, okay?
Ross: Hi. Im uh, Im Ross. I dont, I dont believe weve met. Im Monicas older brother.
Monica: Now you think I wouldn't enjoy that, because it is so fake, (Laughs) but I still do.
Monica: We're just making conversation. (Chandler makes an agreeing-sound)
MONICA: So uh, Joey and Chanlder, I, I think it's time that you take Dr. Greene over to your place.
Monica: Oh good God! If you want a baby so bad just go steal it!
(Janice turns around, Monica sees who it is.)
Monica: So umm, how was your date with Ginger?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time lapse. Rachel is entering the living room from her bedroom as Monica enters.]
[Scene: The beach house, the next morning. Chandler and Monica are in the kitchen eating breakfast.]
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Hold on please. Joey, its your mom. (Hands him the phone.)
Monica: Yeah, apparently theyre turning it into some kinda coffee place.
Monica: Ross, Rachel promised it would be over by now. We seriously have to go, if we want to get to Vermont. I called them and the last train leaves in a half hour.
Monica: Umhmm, umhmm, about the time you told me about New Year's Eve. Where is everybody else?
Monica:: what means if he gets like a disease or kills someone. not if he gets his jollys to jaws!
Rachel: Yeah, Rachel. And this (points to Monica) is Ross' sister, Monica. We met at Thanksgiving. (looks around the room as if searching for something more interesting to do).
Rachel: Monica, what is so amazing? I gave up, like, everything. And for what?
Ross: (to Monica) So, uh, Jules tells me you guys are going shopping tomorrow?
Phoebe: I know, Im sorry! But yknow, this ring is better! Monica never even saw the other ring.
Monica: It's gonna be a problem, isn't it?
Monica: (Reads) Yeah, I'd say so. And there's no 'j' in 'engorged'.
CHANDLER: I'm sorry. �That's the one thing I can't do.� I promised I'd be with Monica.
[Scene: Central Perk, the same scene is continued from before the break. With Joey, Monica, Rachel, and Chandler sitting on the couch.]
Monica: Phoebe and Gary are so gonna hear about this at dinner.
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment: Phoebe, Monica and Mike sitting on the couch]
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica is eating breakfast as Chandler enters.]
Monica: No! Rachel, you didn't find anyone so you can't tell him.
[Time lapse. Now everyone but Ross and Phoebe is back at Monica and Rachel's.]
Monica: You-you gotta take it now. Come on, do it as a present to me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is all there.]
Monica: I cant be fair. Youre my boyfriend.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is finished telling everyone what happened.]
Monica: Well, an-anyway, I justthat night meant a lot to me, I guess Im just trying to say thanks.
Monica: (That annoying competitiveness thing kicks in again, what the heck is that with her and why must the writers show it every flippin' episode?!) Oh, we're not seeing a movie!
(they fight a little, the phone falls and Monica picks it up)
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there except for Chandler. Rachel is writing something and Monica walks up.]
Monica: It's gonna be weird to watch some actor pretending to be Ben's dad.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, morning. Someone knocks on the door and Monica gets it.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone is reading Joeys interview.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and the gang is watching Sumo wrestling on TV.]
Monica: Can you believe it? ...Y'know what? I just don't feel the thing. I mean, they feel the thing, I don't feel the thing.
Rachel: Oh, ok, thank you. (Molly leaves) (to Monica) Do you see what all the guys see in her?
(Monica opens it anyways.)
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Monica are returning from their honeymoon.]
[Scene: the hotel game room. Monica and Mike are still playing ping pong]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Phoebe are telling everyone about their coma guy.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, theyre both unpacked. The big ceramic dog has found a new home in front of the window. Joey screams and runs into the living room.]
Monica: Well, the giraffes okay. And so is the pirate.
(They hear Monica trying to unlock the door. So Phoebe quickly pushes his head down onto the table to make it look like the turkey is just sitting on a platter and not stuck on Joey's head.)
Ross: (to Rachel) Look both, Joey and Monica feel the same way that I do. No-no-no-no.
Monica: Yeah! Oh hes great, I love him. (Walks away and Chandler glares at Phoebe.)
Monica: Oh, please, that is such a lame excuse!
Monica: I wont care, because I know you will be feeling it all in here. (Points to her heart.)
Monica: No youre fine. (Joey checks anyway.) All right well, do you think I could take Rachel?
Joey: Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!
Monica: Hello? (Listens) Oh, hi Ross! (To Rachel) See? Other people call me!
Monica: Hello, people who do not live here.
Monica: (looking at Rachels jeans) Where did you get those jeans?!
Monica: I warned you...
Monica: Sure, we have no money, go ahead.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is on the couch as Monica enters.]