words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering]
Monica: Hey, look at me. I'm making jam, been at it since 4 o'clock this morning.
Monica: Went down to the docks. Bet ya didn't know you could get it wholesale.
Monica: I'm going into business people. I'm sick and tired of being depressed about Richard. I needed a plan, a plan to get over my man. What's the opposite of man? Jam. (sees Joey trying some jam from the pot) Oh Joey don't! It's way to hot. (Joey realizes this and spits what he had in his mouth back into the pot.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering]
Rachel: (reading) 'Gone for more jars. Back later. Monica Geller.'
Monica: (entering) Hey guys.
Monica: Joey, this is for you. (gives him a jar of jam) It's blackberry curin.
Monica: Joey, take your time with that. That's my last batch.
Monica: I figured out I need to charge seventeen bucks a jar just to break even. So, I've got a new plan now. Babies.
Monica: I'm talking about me having a baby.
Monica: Yeah. The great thing about the jam plan was, I was taking control of my life. So I asked myself, what is the most important thing to me in the world and that's when I came up with the baby plan.
Monica: It took me 28 years to find one man that I wanna spend my life with, if I have to wait another 28 years then, I'll be 56 before I can have a baby, and that's just stupid.
Monica: I don't need an actual man, just a couple of his best swimmers. And there, there are places you can go to get that stuff.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is eating jam straight out of the jar, and Chandler is staring at him in amazement. Joey offers him some.]
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) Okay, sperm donor number 03815, come on down! Okay, he's 6'2", 170 pounds, and he describes himself as a male Geena Davis.
Monica: You're gonna what?
Monica: What?! Why? Why is this crazy? So this isn't the ideal way to something....
Monica: Lips moving, still talking. I mean it may not be ideal, but I'm so ready. No, I-I-I see the way Ben looks at you. It makes me ache, you know?
Monica: Okay, all right, how's this? 27. Italian-American guy. He's an actor, born in Queens. Wow, big family, seven sisters, and he's the only....boy. (they all turn and look at Joey) Oh my God, under personal comments: 'New York Knicks, rule!'
Monica: Joey, this is you!
Monica: Well, honey, it is pretty competitive. I mean I've got an actual rocket scientist here.
Monica: I think, that if you really like this guy, you should just trust him.
Phoebe: Thank you, Monica.
Monica: Oh, that's what I would do, forget mine.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering]
Monica: Hey.
Monica: To the bank.
Monica: Sperm.
Monica: Oh yeah, picked a guy, 37135.
Monica: 'Fraid so. Brown hair, green eyes...
Monica: What?
Monica: Really? Why?
Monica: Hoyt?
Monica: Really, is he a swimmer?
Monica: I like that. (Joey starts laughing) What?
Monica: We do not have one of those signs.
Monica: Two girls and a boy?
Monica: And, and, and they wear those little water wings, you know. And they're, they're running around on the deck. Then Hoyt wraps this big towel around all three of them.
Joey: Sure! (Monica gets very depressed) But hey, you know this way sounds good too.
Monica: Yeah.
Joey: Oh Monica. (goes over and hugs her, then looks at the form and stops hugging her.) Wow, this guy's an astronaut. That would've been cool, (sees Monica) for like a day. (hugs her again).
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is finishing off the last of the jam]
Joey and Monica: Are you all right?
Monica: He had to go, theres a deer just outside eating fruit from the orchard.
(Joey and Monica rush over to her.)
Monica: I think youre done.
[Cut to Monica and Rachels apartment, all are there.]
Monica: Ohh, everybody at the restaurant still hates me.
Chandler: Love her! That's right, I LOVE HER!!! I love her!! (They walk together and hug.) I love you, Monica.
RACHEL: Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now.
Monica: All right look, if I take Chandler out of the running will you be able to focus?
Chandler: (To Monica) Now all you have to do is just get through a little bit more, okay? Then we can put you in bed, okay? Just smile and dont talk to anyone.
Monica: Run, Marcel, run! Run, Marcel! (Marcel runs off and Luisa runs after him. Monica goes to check up on Phoebe) Are you okay?
[Scene: Allesandros, Monica is cooking.]
Monica: I think I need a drink.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]
Monica: Hi!
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Oh. Why didnt you take her?
Monica: Do you love her?
Monica: You love her!
Monica: (On the phone) Hello? No, he's not here. Yeah, this is his wife. Yeah, well, it came as quite a shock to me too. I guess I should have known. Yeah, I mean, he just kept making me watch Moulin Rouge.
[Scene: The Moondance Diner, Rachel is talking to Monica about her job.]
Monica: Oh good, Im glad thats catching on.
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Joey is entering]
Monica: Where ya going?
Monica: And well, what did she say?
Monica: Oh, youre totally welcome! Whatd she say?
Monica: You know!
Monica: It is not over! Youre over!
Monica: (Entering) What are you guys doing here?
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Are you sure?
[Scene: Central Perk, the whole gang minus Monica is there.]
(Monica hugs her goes and hugs her)
Monica: All right.
Monica: (to Ross) Honey, its not pushy, he gave her his home number.
Monica: (shyly) I dont know.
Monica: Its a globe and, a pencil sharpener.
Monica: Hello.
Monica: If-if-if we ever did what you did a man would never call.
Monica: All right. When is, when is the next flight out?
Monica: Oh.
Monica: All right, I still need a calamari and a Caesar salad.
Monica: That thing is not coming in here.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Monica: That is an excellent excellent question. That is excellent.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is returning from a date with Josh, and when they get the door open, Rachel turns and passionately kisses Josh.]
Monica: Well uh, you and I are just goofing around, I thought, why not goof around with him.
Monica: Well, what kind of food is he looking for?
Monica: (to the mask) I missed you-you ugly, flat faced old freak!
[Scene: Dr. Burkes office, Tim is examining Monica.]
[Flashback to 524 - TOI Vegas, Part II] [Scene: The Gift Shop, Monica and Chandler are entering.]
Chandler: Well this is great. Yknow, those cameras were the only thing that was gonna cheer Monica up today, shes really depressed.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are playing cards at the dinner table.]
Monica: I can cook and you can take care of the money.
Monica: Um-hmm.
Monica: Why dont we just find a place for it?
Monica: Well, nows a good time. Im on my way to have my ears cut off.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are on the couch as Joey enters.]
Monica: What?! You cant shed a tear for your dead wife!! Now, I left you a note from the beyond!
Monica: What is it?! What about Pete?
Monica and Phoebe: (in unison) Thanks.
Phoebe: Hurry! Monicas gonna make you pack! Shes got jobs for everyone! Now, its too late for me, but save your selves! (The guys scramble for the door.)
Joey: (waving) Very funny Ross! Very life-like and funny. Okay. (Notices that a woman is waving back.) Oh no-no-no, I wasn't waving at you lady. (She just stares at him.) (Joey sees how beautiful she is.) Whoa, maybe I was! Hey, Monica, this totally hot girl in Ross's building is flirting with me.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Monica is busy killing Chandle and Joey at foosball.]
Monica: You know what? This is not over. We will play you again, and we will win, and you will lose, and you will beg, and we will laugh, and we will take every last dime you have, and you will hate yourselves forever.
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Ross is entering.]
Monica: No! Were gonna have fun. We can make fudge!
MONICA: Yeah, he's just gotta get a shot.
Video:April Twelve, Eighteen hundred, Sixty-One (Monica lights Richard's cigar butt), 4:30 A.M. on Tuesday, the United States garrison at Fort Sumter was fired upon (knock on door) it is now under bombardment by....
Monica: Well, every, every Thanksgiving um, we used to have a touch football game called the Geller Bowl.
Monica: Oh, no!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is telling Phoebe and Monica of her date.]
Monica: Emilys straight.
Monica: This is so much fun!
Monica: Ok! When I go places with high humidity, it gets a little extra body, ok?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Monica: This totally makes sense!
[Scene: Monicas childhood bedroom (which has been turned into a gym), Monica is lying on the treadmill as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Two in a row! Youve got to use your tongues now! (They kiss again.)
Monica: (entering) Hey!
Monica: Oh no, she's out having drinks with Carl.
Monica: Yeah, what, do you think were stupid?
Monica: What do you say?
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up as her boss, Mr. Waltham, walks in.) Oh! Mr. Waltham, I ah really need to talk to you.
Monica: Oh, let's not tell this story.
Monica: Thanks. (Joeys still patting the burn spot) I think you got it!
(Monica turns to get the wine.� Chandler peeps through the peephole.� Joey, seeing something, peeps back.� Chandler ducks.� Monica returns with two glasses of wine.� She gives one to Joey.)
MONICA: But I thought you wanted to live by yourself.
Monica: Oh man, they think they are so slick messing with us! But see they don't know that we know that they know! So
Monica: Oh, just do it!!
Monica: Y'know when girls sleep with guys with weird things on their body, they tell their friends about it.
Monica: All right, so what do you say?
Monica: Theyre green?
Monica: My God, you cant even look at me! Can you?
Monica: Oh, good.
Monica: Can I ask you guys a question? D'you ever think that Alan is maybe.. sometimes..
Monica: I dont know!